About Alcoholism
Anonymous
>I find the depiction of alcoholism on NYPD Blue near terrifying. Do viewers
>with alcohol problems find this realistic, and does it make them feel
better
>understood or merely exploited?
I find it VERY realistic. Those who think this problem is overplayed should
do more research on the terrible things alcoholism does to people's lives. I
am totally convinced that all those who downplay the alcohol plot line on
NYPD Blue have no inkling as to the seriousness of this problem. I think
your question shows a desire to understand the problem more fully, and
hopefully, others will be able to answer your question more completely than
I can.
Yes, alcoholism is terrifying. Sometimes I do not know if my husband will
come home at night. There have been times when he has phoned on a cold
winter's night, barely coherent, and I have to pick him up from a distant
train station because he has missed his stop. I pray that he never passes
out somewhere and dies of hypothermia. I love him very much. This is his
only fault and I don't want to lose him.
Luckily, he does not drive, but there are other alcoholics out there driving
cars, putting themselves and your loved ones at risk. Some police statistics
have stated that after midnight, 1 out of every 2 cars on the road are
driven by someone DWI. It's scary knowing that at any time, a car can veer
toward you and hit you head-on. Every intersection is fraught with peril. If
you stop and think about it, you will get an anxiety attack when you drive
in the wee hours of the morning.
And the worst thing is, lots of alcoholics don't seek help. They are (like
my husband) convinced that they are working on the problem and can do it
themselves. I promised to love him through sickness and health, better or
worse. Well, this is the sickness and it IS worse than I could have
imagined. Luckily, he has learned to control his problem to a certain extent
and we only go through really bad times around the Christmas holidays. I
hate the parties his office throws with lots of unlimited booze. I know
non-drunks should not have to penalized for alcoholics' indiscretions, but I
think companies should be more aware of problems and at least open the
parties to spouses so they can look after their loved ones.
But then, there are those who say that when we protect our alcoholics, we
are "enablers." That unless we allow them to hit rock-bottom, they will
never seek help. It is a horrible, horrible disease, and I do think of it as
a disease, not a character fault.
Nobody chooses to drink too much, vomit, make a fool of themselves and wake
up with a hangover. Nobody willingly decides to jeopardize his marriage, his
home, his job, and his loved ones.
Do not ever underestimate the horrible dilemma Diane faces whenever she
looks at that bottle, or socializes with friends, or simply stares at her
empty apartment. It is so tempting to sink into oblivion, because when you
get drunk, all the problems fade away. Trouble is, you wake up the next
morning.
Incidentally, I speak not only as the wife of an alcoholic, but as a person
who attended AA for six months when I was in college because I thought I was
an alcoholic. Turns out that in my later years, I can control it and never
drive after I've had even one drink, but there's always the temptation to go
overboard in the confines of my own home. I find that it's better if I don't
drink at all, and believe me, that's difficult when I'm sitting at home
worrying about my husband.
Quite frankly, I feel that in those cases, I must stay sober in case the
morgue or the hospital calls ....
I'm sure you understand why I have sent this post anonymously.
Thanks for listening. I hope I have impressed on you a bit how terrifying
alcohol abuse is. I'm sure others have stories that are 10,000 times worse
than mine. I thank my lucky stars that out of 365 days a year, my husband
and I have about 30 bad days. The other 90 percent (good days) help me keep
our marriage going.
Paula
Since I can not respond to you by personal e-mail, I hope that you will read
this. You use the word "enablers" which tells me that you may have already
had some dealings with Al-A-Non, but if not, please, please, please try and
find a local chapter where you live.
If you would like to write to me personally, I would love to hear from you.
Sometimes, it's good to have someone to talk to that's a stranger.
For anyone that doesn't know, Al-A-Non is a support group for family members
of alcoholics. It is a very worthwhile organization, and given time,
members can find some peace. One of the greatest pitfalls with the
situation that was described in the above post is the idea of "well, if I
can't beat it, I'll join it". My eldest sister started drinking so that she
could spend more time with her alcoholic husband. I know that sounds
incredibly stupid and unbelievable, but it happens all the time. My sister
died five years ago at the age of 45. Her husband has stopped drinking.
-Paula
Storitellr
>Thanks for listening. I hope I have impressed on you a bit how terrifying
>alcohol abuse is
You are truly a courageous lady. I was deeply touched by your story. I only
hope your husband realizes the extent of his illness and seeks help. He is
very fortunate to have you as his lifemate. God bless you both - you will be
in my prayers.
Deb
IMSussudio
them, understand how terrifying the whole business is. My husband and I are
recovering alcoholics, and I have always related closely to Andy and Sylvia.
The reality of the disease and how it changes people is more intense than
television ever shows, but I think "Blue" comes close. I hope you and your
husband find help, and I am thinking of you.>Yes, alcoholism is terrifying.
alwaysb...@gmail.com
> Someone wrote (and I lost the post):
> >I find the depiction of alcoholism on NYPD Blue near terrifying. Do viewers
> >with alcohol problems find this realistic, and does it make them feel
> better
> >understood or merely exploited?
>
> I find it VERY realistic. Those who think this problem is overplayed should
> do more research on the terrible things alcoholism does to people's lives. I
> am totally convinced that all those who downplay the alcohol plot line on
> NYPD Blue have no inkling as to the seriousness of this problem. I think
> your question shows a desire to understand the problem more fully, and
> hopefully, others will be able to answer your question more completely than
> I can.
> than mine. I thank my lucky stars that out of 365 days a year, my husband
> and I have about 30 bad days. The other 90 percent (good days) help me keep
> our marriage going.