Prisoner (MSTed)

[LoneIdiot]

My first MSTing, so please don't hit me with pieces of wood. The host segments
refer to a guy on a newsgroup who sent roughly 700 posts a day asking what the
"rules" are for MSTing his own work. I asked him to give it to me so I could
shut him up. And now, the results of the MSTing...

Oh, yeah. This takes place in between "Mitchell" and "The Brain/Head That
Wouldn't Die", during the training process the bot's give to Mike.

In the not to distant future....
6...5....4....3....2.....1....
Tom Servo is dressed in a Tux, Crow and Mike are no where to be seen.
Tom Servo: Welcome to the Tom Servo show! {sings-} It's the Servo show,
starring me I'm Servo! It's the Servo show, and I've got lots of good guest
Crow enters stage left
Crow: What are you doing?
Tom Servo:I'm taking advantage of my power as ship's captain
Crow: You're not captain anymore, we have a new guy.
Tom Servo: Are you kidding? He won't last long, Dr. F is gonna show "The Brain
That Wouldn't Die".
Crow: I think maybe we should train him so he dosen't break so easy. He looks
like the kinda guy who could easily blow up two or three planets.
Tom Servo: Ok, I don't have anything to do today. I'll trick Mitch into the
theater and meet you there, you find something easy for us to sit through
Crow: Ok, hey we got commercial sign.
Commercial Sign
Dead Leaves. Ever Blunder?
Crow is looking through the hexfield viewscreen. Kevin Murphy is in the
viewscreen playing "Knight5", the writer of todays fanfic
Crow: Hello
Knight5: I want to MSTie my own work.
Crow: That's nice, but I don't care.
Knight5: What are the rules for MSTing my own work
Crow: You're frigtening me
Knight5: What are the rules? Why don't you answer me?
Crow: Huh?
Knight5: What are the rules?
Crow: Please go away
Knight5: I want to MSTie my own work
Crow: I'm sure anything thought up by you needs it, but please go away
Knight5: What are the rules
Crow: Leave me alone!
Knight5: The rules? Is it freestyle?
Crow: Please die soon
Knight5: You're rude. What are the rules.
Crow: Just send it to me, I'll show you
Knight5: Yes, show me the rules. Next I'm going to heckle spam
Crow: I really couldn't care less if I tried.
Movie Sign goes off-
5....4.....3.....2......1.....

{Crow enters. Mike and Tom are already in the theater}
Crow: What a dickweed

"The Prisoner"
Crow: Number 6?
Tom Servo: That's the chicken Mcnugget meal, right?

Mike: Hello? Story?
Crow: Wanna play 20 questions again?
Tom Servo: Just wait...

IN
{All Scream}
a world where cataracts is finished with a laser
Tom Servo: Hooked on ebonics worked for me
and fax with the touch of a button,
Crow (as Dr. Forrester): Push the button Frank
Mike: I don't get it...
we miss the inconsistences
Tom Servo: I miss them already
and techno folly with startling, and fatal affects. We have advanced so much
it has incompacitated bussinesses
Mike: Yeah, just look at Microsoft
and governments to a sometimes stained
Crow: Go change your armor
existence. We have been bloated with with junk that clouds the mind
Mike: Such as this story
so much that we are overtaken by small cultish groups who say "Come
flock,be one" Consider the case of Johnny
Tom: Tremain?
Crow: Appleseed?
Mike: B. Goode?
Crow: What? That one wasn't dirty!
Mike: Nevermind
Swain.
Crow (as Frenchman from "Monty Python): You swain! I scoff at you! Scoff Scoff!
Circa 1997
*************

John opened the letter.
Tom Servo: Wow, the tension starts building immidietly!
He turned his head back,
Crow: Like in poltergeist?
somehow the mentality shook him into disbelief. "Guess what, Kara- I got a
job"
"Wow." Kara said "Whatcha gonna do?"
All (singing): Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?
"It's Ashridge. I got a job as a art professor there."
Late afternoon, the next day
**********************************
Mike: That was an emotinal, powerful scene
Johnny sat at his desk. pooped.
Crow: In that order?
He never slept,
Tom Servo: That was an X-Files Episode! (1 point if you can name it)
watched tv or used a computer. He just worked, hours on end, completing a
masterpiece for his first lesson-impressionism.
Crow (as Johnny): I slave over a desk all day creating a 1st level
impressionism, and you come home at an undecent hour of the night- this is not
a hotel young man!- asking what's for dinner! I'll tell you what's for dinner-
HUMBLE PIE!
Mike: Calm down, boy
Crow: Sorry
Soon came a loud thump! Johnny looked up, and before him stood two young
men, stocky, and in their thirties.
Tom Servo: Wow, they went from young to their thirties in one sentance
Mike: They grow up so fast...

The Lab, 9:00 P.M.
**********
Mike: Not just a lab, the lab
Johnny Swain woke up.
Crow: What a shame
What he saw looked vague.
Crow: That's a fashion magazine, right?
Mike: That's "Vouge"
Metal cabinets lined the room. Everything looked Grainy, like those Alien
Autopsy films
Tom Servo: Something tells me we'll have to watch one of those at one point
Mike: Let's not give anyone any ideas, here
Crow: But think of the comic potentil of Jonathan Frakes!
Tom Servo: Just read the story
frequenly on television.
Crow: He dosen't watch TV...
Tom Servo: Don't question the narrarrator
He tried to struggle out of his restraints, but now the men tranqulized him.
Mike: Tense change! Duck!
{Mike and 'bot's duck under their seats}
But he managed
Mike: I think we're ok now
{Mike and 'bots get back up}
to catch a "Century
29" over it.
Crow: Ah, it's a moving company
That was the last thing he saw.
****************************************************

Ch.2.
Tom Servo: Is no where near as good as the Sci-Fi channel
Crow: Nice plug there
Tom Servo: Thanks

Some where in Kansas, 9:00 A.M.The morning was young and for Witchita
Fall,Kansas, another day.
Mike: But for everywhere else, another mid-afternoon
First Falls bank was getting yet another "Customer"- They planned to
enter the real estate market. The broker walked in, said hello, and
sat down. A client came down and sat in a chair, adjedcant
Mike: Hey, it's spelled wrong!
Tom Servo: We've seen it all before
to him. s they engaged in conversations, the "broker pulled a gun out. No
later than when he pulled the firearm did the builder become a body.
Tom Servo: An easy two step evolution process
The scene, a body lay dead in cold blood.
Crow: Oh, he was a lizardman
In bread daylight.
Mike {chuckling}: Bread...
Crow: We get in trouble for grammer flares, Mike
Mike: Sorry
Somewhere,
Tom Servo: Over the rainbow....
N.C. 7:
Crow: The new story rating system comes into play
30 P.M.
********************************
Mike: A chicken wire fence!
Kara looked up at the T.V.
Mike: I'm sure what's on the T.V. is much more intresting than this story
Blank.
Tom Servo: Yep. Way more intresting
She thought for a few seconds,
Crow: Vainly trying to figure out what the heck is going on in this story
laughed.
Mike: We all are
and went back to work. Life with Johnny was hard enough-strict parents forced
them to elope 11 years ago.
Crow: I thought people eloped to get away from strict parents
Dammit, she thought, I ain't gonna
Tom Servo: Pay a lot for this muffler
get beat down again. She was young then. "A 17 year old shoud be party'n she
would say, and that haunted her.
Mike: Yeah, that is pretty chilling
Tom Servo: This guy should write for the Twilight Zone
Kara started the washing machine, licked every stamp, sealed every
envelope.
Mike: Ate all the meatloaf, killed the chickens, read a Tom Clancy book,
summarized her life in two words or less, juged the spelling bee, ran for
President, killed three people, bent a paperclip, ate a waffle, saw "It's A
Wonderful Life", digitally remastered "Vertigo", got a recording contract,
shot a man in Reno just to watch him die-
Tom Servo: Please stop, you're frightening me
Darn!
Crow: I used up my allotment of curse words!
Another bill!
Mike: But....she's sending mail....
Just then the doorbell rung. She opened the door and let in the dishleveled
stranger inside. "My gosh, John,
Tom Servo: So, not quite a stranger per say, I guess
What happend to you?"
Mike: I'm wondering the same thing
"Uh, I don't know. Been kidnapped or something."
Crow: He's awfully perky
Tom Servo: Played by Joel Hodgson
Mike: Who's he?
Crow: He's a stand up comic with a really funny show on cable...
Tom Servo: He's pretty funny
Mike: Is he as funny as I am
Crow amd Tom Servo: NEVER ASK THAT QUESTION! NEVER NEVER EVER BRING IT UP
AGAIN!
Mike: Sorry
His rugged thirty year okd smile was pleasing, considering the event
of the last two days.
Tom Servo: WHAT EVENT? NOTHING HAS HAPPENED THIS WHOLE STORY? IT'S LIKE AN
EPISODE OF SEINFEILD WITHOUT ANY JOKES! MAKE THE BAD MEN GO AWAY! AHHHHHHHH!
Crow: You ok?
Tom Servo: Fine, thanks.
"kidnapped? Geez, John, let's call the police."
Mike: What should we call them?
"No,no." He smiled "let's not."
Crow: Let's call phsycic Friends
Johnny hugged Kara, then gave a kiss on Kara's cheek."
Tom Servo: He's so romantic!
"I love you"
Crow: Wow, a steamy love scene!
Then came another blackout.
Mike: Like in New York! (1 point if you can name the year of the famous New
York blackout)
Tom Servo: This story left me feeling strangely empty
Crow: It's like the first 500 pages of any Tom Clancy Book
{Mike and Bot's leave theater}
1...2....3....4....5....6....
Tom Servo: Usually we would have a host segment here, Mike, but I'm stumped.
Mike: Host segments are probably easier when some sort of event happens in the
story. Hey, where's Crow?
Tom Servo: Oh, he's at a discussion group about the rules to MSTing a story.
Let's watch.
Hexfield Viewscreen opens. Around a table sits Knight5 (played by Kevin
Murphy), Crow, and TV's Frank.
Knight5: What are the rules to MSTing?
Crow: Sorry, we already milked the little inherent humor in thast back in the
beggining
Knight5: Oh.
TV's Frank (wide eyed, talking like the guy from "Scream"): "There are rules to
a funny MSTing!
Crow (interrupts under his breath): Shame the writer of this netMST didn't
follow them....
Knight5: Shutup golden spider monkey! What are the rules?
(Crow goes under the table, and comes back up with a baseball bat in his hand.
He breaks Knight5's kneecaps and leaves as the hexfield closes)
Mike: I'm worried about this MSTing thing....
Tom Servo: Joe Don Baker
Mike: Bad!
Tom Servo: Beverly Garland
Mike: Good!
Tom Servo: You'll do fine. See 'ya next week everybody
FWOOSH-
All copyright belong to whomever they belong too. Imitation is the sincerist
form of flattery. It is not intended that the writer take offensse at the
harshness directed to him in the host segments or MSTing, but I didn't use a
lot of my more evil ideas, so take it like a man!

Stinger- His rugged thirty year okd smile was pleasing, considering the event
of the last two days.