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MiSTING: The Field Trip [STNG, Marrissa, Ratliff] [PG] [2/8]

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Dec 27, 1998, 3:00:00 AM12/27/98
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[6 . . . 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . . ]
[Mike, Crow, and Tom enter and sit down.]
Crow: Wow. Weird things are afoot at the Circle K, eh
Tommy?
Tom: Yep.

>From: srat...@runet.edu (Stephen Ratliff)
>Subject: NEW TNG The Field Trip [G] 0/9 (Marrissa Stories)
>Date: 05 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT

Crow: Great - the mere mention of Stephen’s name stopped all
the clocks!

>Message-ID: <71ra5p$q...@newslink.runet.edu>
>Organization: Radford University
>Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
>Title: The Field Trip

Tom: I'm tripping! I'm tripping!!!
Mike: Don't worry, little buddy, I'll talk you down...

>Author: Stephen Ratliff (srat...@runet.edu)

All: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


>Series: TNG, Marrissa Stories
>Rating: [G]
>Codes:
>Part: REV 1/1
>

Tom: Revelations 1:1?
Mike: Well, this *is* the beginning of the Apocalypse, so it's
appropriate.

>Version: 2.0
>

Crow: I hope he fixed that annoying bug where if you mention
"isosceles"-

[The sound of "Sproing!" followed by a loud "Splat!" can be
heard as Crow is catapulted out of his chair, and into the
wall of the theater. Tom and Mike turn to watch as Crow
crawls back to his chair.]

Crow: [muffled] Ow. I guess he didn't.

>This is a work of fiction, any relation to real people, events,
>or places are a product of the author's imagination.
>

Crow: Yeah, like anyone would think a Marrissa story was based on
reality.
Tom: Don't let this happen to you. Don't mix disclaimers. Thank I,
won't you?

>Disclaimer:
>Star Trek and its environment,

Tom: Outer Space?

> and inhabitants are property of
>the great and powerful Paramount.

Crow: [Booming Bass] I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL PARAMOUNT!!! PAY
NO ATTENTION TO THAT DESILU BEHIND THE CURTAIN!!!

> The lowly author is merely
>borrowing them between episodes and seasons. He hopes to return
>them all the better for their journey.

Tom: In other words, he's going to hit the reset button.

> The story is his.
>

Tom: And yet we've wound up with it for the second time!
Crow: So why doesn't the universe just kill us and be done
with it?
Mike: I have a feeling the universe & Pearl are in cahoots.

>Author's Forward
>

Mike: Actually, the author is only a bit forward. More like off
to the side an inch or two.

>I've decided to split up Away From Home.

Tom: All the love had gone out of the marriage. It's better for
the kids this way.

> As I do this, the first
>part of Away From Home, which is known as The Field Trip is being
>revised.

Mike: I thought we were reading the first part now.
Crow: This must've been some attempt to warn us that never got through.

> The other parts may also be revised at a later date,
>but for now, the first part is enough.

Tom: *More* than enough, in fact!
Crow: No kidding.

> You'll notice that though
>the Prologue and Chapter One are very close to the original
>version, but from then on, things change.
>

Crow: That must be the chapter when the line dancing weasels
appear, and when Picard gets turned into a large lemur.
Tom: No, that's when Marrissa resigns from Star Fleet and begins
writing Tom Clancy-esque technothrillers?
Crow: Nonono, she gets appointed head of the Federal Reserve Board
and lowers the prime interest rate to 3.5%, ushering in an
era of moderate but refreshing growth.
Mike: Maybe she'll just get acne, study for her tests, go to the
prom and act like a real teenager.
Tom: C'mon, Mike, try to keep it realistic, okay?

>Why am I doing this?

Mike: That's a question we've asked ourselves many a time.

> Well I think I can do a better job.

Tom: I think Akiva Goldsman could do a better job!!!

> It's
>been 3 years since I first posted the Away From Home trilogy.

Tom: o/~ 5 days since you riffed on me. I still have the postings
on my HD. o/~
Crow: o/~ It's been three days since the afternoon, I realized
that I shouldn't write about showtunes. o/~
Mike: o/~ Yesterday, it just dawned on me, I really, really, really,
really, really shouldn't have posted Time Speeder. o/~

> In
>that time I've taken a class on creative fiction writing,

Mike: [Stephen] Which reminds me, I really should send a bouquet to
poor Mr. Jergenson at the state home.

> written
>over a dozen other works, and refined my technics.

All: <snerk>
Tom: There! There is the line that defines Stephen Ratliff!

> Now lets see
>if all that work was worth it.
>

Mike: Too easy.
Tom: Are you going to let that stop you?
Mike: You're right.
All: IT WASN'T!

>Let's journey back in time to the beginning of Marrissa's
>Adventures.

Crow: Back when Marrissa was just a struggling young art student,
not yet the swashbuckling telephone sanitizer she'd one
day become.

> Back when she was just the daughter of two security
>officers,

Tom: Shh! Don't warn them that the horrible spectre of death
will be bearing down upon them soon!

> and had just been nicknamed "Number One" by the
>Captain.

Mike: Ah, the sweet innocent days of "The Next Generation"'s 1st season.
Before Tasha got eaten by an oil slick, before the Warp Five Speed
Limit, and long, long, before Neelix.
Crow: So, this story takes place inside that turbolift then?

> Before her first command,

Tom: Wow, while she was still in the maternity ward of the hospital?

> before all her adventures in
>the center seat of the Enterprise ...
>

Crow: Soon we'll see Marrissa take over the preschool playground!
Tom: [as Hollywood Squares contestant] Ummm, I'll take Lieutenant
Commander Marrissa Amber Flores Flying Buttress Picard, to
block...
Mike: [Sigh] So, we *are* going to see Stephen Ratliff's Marrissa
Babies then.

>Stephen Ratliff
>
>
>--
>Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
>srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496

Crow: Virginia. Home to Washington. Jefferson. Lee. Wilson. And
now - Ratliff.

>rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/FAQs/ FAQ Maintainer for ASC.
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/ascindex/ Index Maintainer too.
>also at: http://archive.nu/
>
>"Put down the pencil. Put down the pencil, Mr. Russell."
> -- Dr. Wychoff, DS9's Shadows and Symbols
>

Mike: [Dr. Wychoff] C'mon, put it down. Put it down. Put it down! OW!
My eye!

>
>From: srat...@runet.edu (Stephen Ratliff)
>Subject: NEW TNG The Field Trip [G] 1/9 (Marrissa Stories)
>Date: 05 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT
>Message-ID: <71ra7e$q...@newslink.runet.edu>
>Organization: Radford University
>Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
>
>
>Title: The Field Trip
>Author: Stephen Ratliff (srat...@runet.edu)

Crow: Mike, how many rats could Ratliff liff if Ratliff could
liff rats?
Mike: Pass.

>Series: TNG, Marrissa Stories
>Parts: NEW 1/9
>Rating: [G]
>Codes:
>
>

>101374

Mike: Oh my God... this is his 101374th story?!?
Crow: Nah, it means something else.
Mike: What?
Crow: Uh... sorry, no idea.

>Prologue
>
>Personal Log
>Marrissa A. Flores

Crow: Wow, it just looks so insignificant without all the, ahem,
"well deserved" titles.

>STARDATE 45924
>

Crow: Hey, let's Kibo the first paragraph!
Mike: Well, we haven't done that for a while. Why not?
Tom: You start, Mike.

> My mom suggested that I start keeping this log as a way to

Mike: work out my megalomania issues. I guess I'll find some
other way to

>express my hopes and dreams and to record my day like I use to

Tom: carve into the walls. But if I destroy any lives, mom
wants me to

>tell her. Mom's been too busy since Lieutenant Worf gave her a

Crow: teddy he bought at Victoria's Secret. He says it's for her
"special"

>new assignment.

Crow: Well, that was fun.
Mike: But tiring. Let's just move on.
Tom: Wait! One more riff! [Marrissa's mom] Honey, be a dear
and write down your feelings, would you? I'll read them
later. That should take the place of conversation and
face-to-face quality time.

> I think I should begin with who I am.

Crow: [Marrissa] Since I need to provide some exposition.

> I'm ten years old and
>I live on the starship Enterprise. I'm an B student for the most
>part.

All : Gasp!
Mike: The Chosen One is *only* a B student?
Tom: Scandalous!
Crow: Ah, she's probably slacking off 'cause she's not
challenged in class.
Tom: Then again, with sentences like "I'm an B student,"
I'm surprised she doesn't have *a* D average.

> My only problem in school is Alien Language. I just can't
>grasp them.

Mike: [Marrissa] Why they all can't speak English in the first place,
I'll never understand...
Crow: [Marrissa] And Alien Biology. I keep burning off fingers with
that alien blood.

> I like school on the Enterprise, with one exception.

Tom: [Marrissa] I don't feel like I have enough of a stranglehold
on these crewmembers.

>It's not the subject matter, nor the teacher (although my
>classmates say that Lieutenant Allen was Dead on Arrival),

Tom: Ah! The rarely-seen "Hold you down and bludgeon you
with it" school of foreshadowing. Nice.

> but
>the other students in Computing Fundamentals.

Mike: [Marrissa] All of my problems are other peoples' fault!
Stupid other people!

> Comp Fun is

All : Fundamental!

>generally taught on an interest basis to eight-year-olds,

Mike: Basically, they learn how to download porn from the Internet.

> but
>there wasn't enough interest in the past two years, so I had to
>wait.

Tom: She should've just rolled over her investments into high-risk
CD's. That would've given her a higher rate of interest.

> My problem with my classmates is they don't seem to want to
>learn.

Tom: [Marrissa] I, on the other hand, realize how important knowledge
is to a future Evil Overlord.
Crow: I get the feeling that Marrissa also reminds her teacher
when the class almost misses a quiz.

> Jay and Alexander are always getting caught playing video
>games in class.

Bots: The future is foresaken. The future is foresaken. The future
is foresaken. The future is fo-
Mike: Thank you, that's enough.

> Shayna plays practical jokes on everyone.

Tom: Ooh, more subtle foreshadowing. I'm impressed.

> At
>least Clara appears to be studying in class ... although I don't
>think it's always Comp Fun.

Mike: Oh, how dare she do her Quantum Physics homework in Comp Fun!

> Tomorrow we're going on a Field Trip to the Daystorm
>Institute for Computer Science.

Mike: And we have a title!
Tom: [Marrissa] The day after that, we're going to the Nightstorm
Institute for Spelling.

> It's nothing we can't see on
>the Holodeck,

Mike: [Marrissa] So the obvious thing to do is waste dilithium
crystals and weaken the Federation's defenses by having the
Enterprise take us to the Daystrom Institute.

> but Clara at least thinks it will be interesting.
>

Crow: [Clara] I sense doom and danger... Ooh! And strawberry
pop-tarts!

>Close Personal Log.
>

Crow: And -
All: Flush!
Crow: Am I becoming predictable?
Tom: A tad.

>--
>Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
>srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496
>rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/FAQs/ FAQ Maintainer for ASC.
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/ascindex/ Index Maintainer too.
>also at: http://archive.nu/
>
>"Put down the pencil. Put down the pencil, Mr. Russell."
> -- Dr. Wychoff, DS9's Shadows and Symbols

Tom: Put down that pencil and sing, sing, SING!

>
>
>From: srat...@runet.edu (Stephen Ratliff)
>Subject: NEW TNG The Field Trip 2/9 [G] (Marrissa Stories)
>Date: 11 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT
>Message-ID: <72cibf$l...@newslink.runet.edu>
>Organization: Radford University
>Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
>
>
>Title: The Field Trip
>Author: Stephen Ratliff (srat...@runet.edu)
>Series: TNG, Marrissa Stories #0
>Parts: NEW 2/9
>Rating: [G]
>Codes:
>
>Note: This story is being serialized, posting on Wednesday and
>Saturday.

Crow: Unless the previous Tuesday was a prime integer, in which
case it will be Monday and Thursday, except in months with
"R"'s, when it will be Sundays, Fridays, and dates evenly
divisible by 5.

>
>101374

Mike: He sure has a short Social Security number.
Crow: Or a long area code.

>Chapter One
>

Mike: The Phantom Menace!

> Marrissa was the last to arrive for the field trip.

Tom: [Marrissa] I'm sure you mere mortals didn't mind waiting
while I took a long, relaxing bubble bath. Porter! Start
loading my 48 parcels of beauty supplies into the
shuttle!

>Lieutenant Allen was standing by the shuttle's rear door.

Mike: He's trying to give the rear door "more power".

> "Glad
>you could make it, Marrissa," he said. "Please take a seat."

Tom: Under that suspended piano, preferably.

>Marrissa took the remaining seat.

Mike: Lieutenant Allen then put the stripped shuttlecraft on
cinder blocks, and they all made a run for it!

> As she sat down, a whoopee
>cushion made it's incriminating sound.

Tom: J'Accuse!
Crow: Marrissa's going to have someone flogged to death for
that.

> Everyone laughed,

Mike: Except for that sourpuss, Alan Dershowitz.

> and
>Marrissa glared at Shayna

Crow: [Marrissa] Damn, have to start a new page on the enemies
list...[as if writing] "Shay-na".

> and handed the whoopee cushion to Lt.
>Allen as he passed by.

Mike: Then an enraged Whoopi stormed the shuttle to retrieve her
cushion.
Tom: First rule of life on the Enterprise: Never Annoy Guinan!
Mike: Or make fun of the Squares.

> As he reached the cockpit he turned and said, "Behave on
>this trip or there won't be any more."

Crow: Any more what? Whoopee cushions?
Tom: [Allen] Oh, and in the event of an emergency, you can
suffocate yourselves with the plastic bags that will drop
from the ceiling, because I've got the only parachute and
your seats will plummet straight to the bottom of the ocean
floor in the event of a water landing.

> He turned back into the
>cockpit and sat down in the Co-Pilot seat

Tom: [Co-Pilot] Hey, I'm sitting here!

> ... on a whoopee
>cushion.

Crow: I'm sensing a motif, here.

> The Lieutenant looked up at the ceiling and shook his
>head,

Tom: I'll get you, you crazy kids! And your mangy dog, too!

> while removing the offending item.

Mike: [Marrissa] Sir! Put your pants back on! There's kids
here!
Tom: [Shayna] Hold on a minute, Marrissa...I like what I see!

> Ensign Throwaway entered the shuttle

[All cheer]
All: Throw-a-WAY! Throw-a-WAY! Throw-a-WAY!!!!
Crow: Wow, can't believe he's alive again.
Mike: [cheerfully as Throwaway]: I look forward to a long
and successful life in Starfleet, sir!

> and sat down.

[pause]
Crow: No whoopee cushion?
Mike: Lt. Allen must've been serious about that!

> The rear
>of the shuttle closed and Lt. Allen said,

Tom: "I'm going to marry my daughter".

> "Shuttle April to
>bridge,

Tom: [singing] Though Shuttle April may come your way, it brings
the flowers, that bloom in the MAAAAAAAY!!!

> Request permission depart for Archer IV from Shuttle bay
>Two."

Tom: Of course, without saying it through the communicator, he
Only made himself look like a dummy.

> "Bridge to Shuttle April," Commander Riker's voice
>said.

Tom: Not Commander Riker, only the ethereal, disembodied voice
of Commander Riker.
Crow: [Riker] Shouldn't you be calling the flight control center?

> "Permission granted, now relaying departure coordinates."

Mike: Departure coordinates: Right here! Arrival coordinates,
still unknown.

> "Coordinates received," Ensign Throwaway announced. "Shuttle
>bay doors opening."

Crow: [Throwaway] Ensign Barclay now floating adrift in the middle
of space.

> "Depart when ready, Bridge out."
> "Leaving shuttle bay 2 now, April out," Lt. Allen said.

Crow: So stop talking about it and leave already! Sheesh!
Tom: [Professorial voice] April is the cruelest shuttle, breeding
lilacs out of the dead land, mixing memory and desire...

> The shuttle moved out of the shuttle bay, between the warp
>engines. It turned right and slightly up and went in to warp.
>

Crow: Running into the port warp nacelle.
Mike: Oh, the humanity!

>Personal Log
>Marrissa Flores
>In route to Archer IV

Crow: That's a superhero team consisting of Green Arrow, Hawkeye,
Robin Hood and William Tell.

> I really wish Shayna would stop those practical jokes.

Mike: [Marrissa] Really, how many blooper reels can they pull out
of this?

> I
>really hate them.

Crow: [Marrissa] She'll be the first against the wall when the
revolution comes.

> That will probably only happen in my dreams,
>of course.

Tom: Wait, does that mean the practical jokes will only happen in
her dreams, or that she's only hate them in her dreams?

> I think my hopes and dreams were the next things I was
>planing to write about.

Mike: [Marrissa] I see a galaxy-wide empire with my picture in
every corner, and planets with "I WAS CONQUERED BY A
BUNCH OF KIDS" burned across their continental shelves!
Crow: She can't write until she performs her basic carpentry duties?

> When I was little, I use to want to be a
>Princess.

Tom: [Marrissa] Thena I can hire people to prrofread forme.
Mike: Y'know, in most stories, that would remain a childish
fantasy.

> It is my Dad's nickname for me.

Crow: That and "bitch puppy".

> Of course you have to
>be born a Princess, and even though my Mom calls Dad her "Prince
>Charming," I don't think Dad's a Prince.

Crow: [Marrissa] He's more a George Clinton and Parliament
Funkadelic.


> He's too much of a
>rough and ready man for that.

Tom: Her father is Zachary Taylor?

> Princes are supposed to be
>handsome, always dashing to the fair maiden's defense.

Mike: Then they dash off to the King to see if he's dead
yet.
Tom: And they're always changing their names changed to
"Seahorse Trumpet Thingy" and singing in that whiny
high-pitched tone.

> They're
>supposed to dress well, talk well, and be above petty squabbles.

Crow: Well, Marrissa seems to be getting an F in history, too.

>Dad isn't.

Mike: [Marrissa] He's just so - mortal and stuff!

> My teachers think I'd be a good Scientist.

Mike: Not just a scientist, a *Scientist.*
Crow: Maybe scientists have been elevated to god status.
Tom: Well, Science! Is a M/VH skill...

> I probably could
>be, if I gave up my other activities and devoted a lifetime of
>study to it.

Tom: A lifetime of monkish devotion to watching quantum particles
zip around randomly and trying to make sense of their
patterns? Sounds like fun to me!

> I'm not ready to do that yet. I have too much fun
>going camping, riding horses, and playing the piano.

Crow: And she does them all at the same time!
Tom: [Marrissa] As well as plotting for total control over the
Alpha Quadrant.
Mike: Guys, I think we're just a bit before Marrissa's power quest,
here....

> Not that science isn't fun, and I've done some fun things as
>a result of my interest in it.

Tom: Her "Spontaneous Combustion in Anti-Matter Warp Drives" demo
was a real hoot!
Mike: And I kinda liked when she put that cherry photon torpedo
in the waste disposal system.

> Like the tour with the Captain.

Crow: Stubing?
Mike: You know, I can't really picture Marrissa chatting it up with
Gopher.
Tom: [Marrissa] Those six hours that I spent scrubbing the Intermix
Chamber with a toothbrush were the happiest hours of my life!

>I know a tour given by Captain Picard is not exactly known as a
>fun event.

Tom: Don't EVER get him started with his photo album!
Mike: And remember to wear the sunglasses, and never, ever, look
directly at his head.

> He is known for being uncomfortable around children.

Crow: [Marrissa] Which is why he talked to us through a
communicator and always kept a good fifty feet away at
all times.

>And the first try at the tour wasn't exactly a success. He was
>obviously unsure about how to deal with us, but after my science
>project hit,

Mike: [Casey Kasem] And now, climbing to the top of the
charts..."Distribution and Movement of Quantum Filaments."

> he got the idea to make us officers.

Tom: See?!? She *planned* that whole thing! She set it up
herself!
Crow: I always suspected.

> This gave him
>a role that he knew how to deal with us though.

Mike: Because as we all know, without a Starfleet rank you're
lower than dirt.
Crow: [Marrissa] He was the naughty French milkmaid and we were
the German paratroopers.

> I'd say that he learnt quite a bit by the time the second
>time the tour was attempted. We visited the Battle Bridge, the
>Torpedo Bay,

Crow: [Picard] Anyone want to volunteer to show how we fire a
torpedo?
Mike: [Jay] Aww! We've seen that!
Crow: [Picard] From the inside of the tube?
Mike: [Jay] Cool!

> and he even had Commander La Forge show us the
>dilithium crystals.

Crow: [Marrissa] They put us right in the chamber with them, with
no shielding or anything!
Mike: [LaForge] Touch them, kids! You might lose a finger due to
radiation poisoning!
Bots: Cooool!

> But for me the highlight was the visit to
>Stellar Cartography. While working on my science project,
>"Distribution and Movement of Quantum Filaments,"

Crow: Wha?
Mike: I think that has to do with how dustbunnies get under
the coach.
Tom: Ladies and gentlemen, a 10-year-old "B" student!

> I had used many
>3-D projections of the location of the known Filaments. However
>none of them where like Stellar Cartography.

Tom: Where Stellar Cartography? There Stellar Cartography.
There pips. There wolf.

> That display made
>mine look like preschool scribble.
>

Crow: Yeah, in my preschool scribble, I had only solved the most
basic paradoxes of string theory.

> The shuttlecraft shook, jolting Marrissa out of her writing.

Tom: It's a shame that the entire state of Virginia isn't shaken by
violent earthquakes at least four times a day, isn't it?

>Over the speaker came the announcement, "Heave to and prepare to
>be boarded."

Tom: Or just heave and prepare to be bored.
Crow: They've flown into the Pirates of the Caribbean ride!

> The transmission was filled with static and sounded
>old, almost as if the broadcaster had recorded it from an old
>Earth pirate movie.

Tom: It went on to say "And furthermore, I be not afraid of ye,
Blind Pew" and just got confusing from there.

> Lieutenant Allen took the shuttle out of warp,

Mike: Then he hosted the _Tonight Show_, wrote several books,
and invented the Pog.

> diving into a
>nearby planetary system.

Crow: Then he parks behind a billboard, and when the Trakce pass,
he peels out and heads for the state line!

> There was no time to send a distress
>signal, as the red stylized batwing vessel pursued.

Tom: And now, a crossover with the 1950's Batman.
Crow: Bat Mite, Ace the Bat Hound, Flamebird and Nightwing
are onboard that plane, I just know it.

> His co-pilot
>struggled to keep the necessary systems working as the enemy
>pounded on the small craft.

Mike: [muffled, as if from outside] Open up! We just want to
give you a complementary copy of "The Watchtower"!

> It dodged left and right the purple
>phaser bolts of the enemy vessel.

Tom: Then without warning, their active verb fell off!

> As it neared the planet the
>enemy scored an glancing shot on the impulse engine.

Mike: [Ray Stevens] I hollered, "DON'T LOOK, ETHEL!" but ituz too
late - he done glanced at her, right thar on th'impulse engine!

> "Lieutenant, I've lost helm control," Ensign Throwaway
>announced. "We are going to crash land."

Tom: Hey, guys, here it comes - Throwaway's big chance!
Mike: Maybe this time he can break the Ratliff Curse!
Crow: C'mon, Ensign Throwaway, you're the dude!

> Back in the cabin

Mike: Abraham Lincoln was born.

> panic reigned. Then into the chaos the
>shy Marrissa's voice rang out.

Tom: Which Marrissa is that?!?
Crow: I don't think we've seen that particular version before.

> "Take your seats.

Mike: [as Marrissa] Please bring your seats to their upright position,
and put away your tray tables.

> If you sit
>down, turn around and shut up then we will get though this."

Crow: [Marrissa] If you don't, I'll kill you.
Mike: The "shy" Marrissa, ladies and gentlemen.

> Meanwhile in the cockpit things were improving.

Crow: Throwaway's got it goin' on!!!
Tom: Coming soon: "Star Trek: The Throwaway Generation"!!

> "I'm
>regaining helm control," Ensign Throwaway announced.

All: THROWAWAY! THROWAWAY! HE'S OUR MAN!
Mike: You go, Throwaway! Way to mysteriously repair the
navigational system!
Crow: [sharply] Are you questioning Throwaway's omnipotence?

> Then all
>the sudden things got much worse.

Mike: [Throwaway] Oh, no! The IRS!
Tom: <gasp> No! It couldn't be!
Crow: [desperately] There's still a chance that he kept
Throwaway alive!

> A purple bolt hit the shuttle
>sending a pulse of electricity shot thought the hull hitting the
>Star Fleet officers.

Mike: Ah, the highly selective Starfleet Officer Electrocution Bolt!
Bots: NO!
Tom: Wait, maybe he survived the blast!

> They slumped over the console, dead.
>

[pause]
Crow: Well, Throwy whiffed it again!
Mike: So...all the adults are dead? Wow! That came totally out of
left field!

>
>--
>Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
>srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496
>rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/FAQs/ FAQ Maintainer for ASC.
>http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/ascindex/ Index Maintainer too.
>also at: http://archive.nu/
>
>"Put down the pencil. Put down the pencil, Mr. Russell."
> -- Dr. Wychoff, DS9's Shadows and Symbols

Crow & Mike: Shadows and Symbols and Wychoff - oh my!
Shadows and Symbols and Wychoff - oh my!
Tom: Never mind that, you guys - it’s time for the service.
Mike: Service?
Tom: Let’s go.
Crow: Now what?
Mike: Y’got me - let’s go see.

[All exit]

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