: Mehran Mikail
I'm not as interested in Commercial Break as I am in getting ripped off.
I have been searching for a while now, and to tell you the truth I was
getting ready to pay someone $20 to mug me and take $179 and my watch.
It seems that this deal saves me $20 AND MY WATCH!!! The only thing that
could make this connercial break better is if it's Klapper ready and it
won't pick up the interference from my smokeless ashtray.
There's only one thing wrong with the concept. They don't always
show the blank screen at the beginning and end of commercial breaks.
In fact they seem to put them at the beginning, but not the end.
This means that your VCR will conitnue flying through the shows.
But more importantly...
There's no problem with selling things, but do it on the proper
newsgroup danmmit! These newsgroups exists so that we can discuss
the shows, not for you to have a free way to advertise!!!
M, BATR..
..Steve Bilan
meh...@atlanta.emna.slb.com writes:
>I have some great news for TV fans
<Mike> Let me guess...you'll never be on television
<Crow> That _would_ be great news.
>who record their favorite programs on VCR
>to watch later.
<Tom> I record my programs so I can watch them _ahead_ of time.
>Would you like to watch all your recorded programs withouth
>any commercial interruption?
<All> *Sally Struthers voice* Sure! We all would!
>If the answer is yes, continue to read.
<Crow> What if the answer is "no"?
<Tom> Be afraid...be very, very afraid.
>There is a new device that you hook up to your VCR,
<Mike> so you'll know where it is at all times.
>and when you watch the pre-recorded video tapes,
<Tom> As opposed to what? NON-recorded tapes?
>it skips over the commercials. Instead you will see
>a pleasant blue screen for 1-2 seconds
<Crow> Does this _please_ you? Do you find me _pleasing_?
>and then immediately back to the program.
<Mike> Tense alert! Call in the grammar police!
>The VCR does record the commercial, but on the play back skips the
>commercials entirely.
<Tom> Gee, that's useful.
>The device is called Commercial Brake
<Mike> And I liked it so much, I bought the company!
> and retails for $199
<Crow> $199?? I can hit "fast forward" for free!
>but for a limited time it can be obtained for $179.
<Tom> Oh! Big savings! Bite me, pal!
> If you are interested in getting Commercial Brake,
<All> Don't watch them!
> drop me a line and I will tell you how to get it.
<Tom> Can we drop you off a building instead?
<Mike> Now, Tom, let's be nice here. He's doing us a great service
you know.
<Crow> How? By leaving?
<Mike> Well, that too... Speaking of which, let's do the same....
1 ..... 2 ..... 3 ..... 4 ..... 5 ..... 6 .....
<Mike> In light of today's commercial advertisement, cleverly disguised
as an advertisement, we here on the Satellite of Love would like
to take this time to inform you of this new amazing product,
available from SOL Manufacturing, Inc.
<Tom> *holds up box* This amazing new product, which plugs into your
computer or terminal, is called "Moron-Free", and can be used
to filter out Usenet postings from complete idiots.
<Crow> Yes, now you can make your newsreader moron-free, and save yourself
precious seconds by automatically skipping articles from clueless
net.idiots.
<Tom> Instead of having to read their drivel, you are presented with a
pleasing black screen for 1 or 2 seconds, before skipping to the
next article.
<Mike> Yes, it sounds too good to be true, but with our latest break-
throughs in technology, article filtering is just a snap! Your
"Moron-Free" can even be custom-configured to weed out the following:
<Tom> (1) Articles cross-posted to every newsgroup
<Crow> (2) Articles posted individually to every newsgroup
<Mike> (3) ARTICLES POSTED IN ALL CAPS
<Tom> (4) Commercial advertisements
<Crow> (5) Postings from FidoNet
<Mike> (6) Anything from Robert McElwaine, Melvin Gladstone, or Abian
Alexander
<Tom> How much would you pay for this incredible device? $100? $1000??
<Crow> Well, through this special introductory offer, you can get
"Moron-Free" for the amzing low price of $19995.99!
<Mike> Act now! Don't hesitate! With this device, you'll never have to
waste precious miliseconds pressing the "n" key on your newsreader!
<Tom> To order, place your name, address, and method of payment on a
3" x 5" index card, crumple it up, and throw it away.
<Crow> Disclaimer: "Moron-Free" is not suitable for small pets, children,
or adults. Keep away from hot, cold, and room-temperature
environments. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Some assembly
required. Instructions, directions, and battery not included.
<Mike> What do you think, sirs?
Disclaimer: MST3k is copyright Best Brains, Inc. This was done without
their permission, but I hope they like it
--
John Mechalas \ If you think my opinions are Purdue's, then
mech...@expert.cc.purdue.edu \ you vastly overestimate my importance.
Purdue University \ Stamp out and abolish redundancy.
School of Aeronautical Engineering \ If you can read this you are too close.
Different subject. I once saw someone's sig with an ascii version of
Mike, Crow & Tom but didn't save it. If someone out there has this
could you PULLLEEEZZZEEE email it to me?
Thanks,
Ron
--
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ronald J. Beck | IP rb...@ra.csc.ti.com |Do now what others
Member, Group Tech Staff | MaBell (214) 995-0698 |won't so you can do
Texas Instruments | |later what others
Dallas, Texas | |can't!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
>I have some great news for TV fans who record their favorite programs on VCR
>to watch later. Would you like to watch all your recorded programs withouth
>any commercial interruption? If the answer is yes, continue to read.
[ ... ]
My question is: Do you have a device that will allow me to read my
newsgroups without any commercial interruption?
--
Milt Epstein
Department of Computer Science
University of Illinois
eps...@cs.uiuc.edu
Absolutely agree! If I wanted to see a commercial, I'd be watching
television right now.
--
The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the University of
North Carolina at Chapel Hill, the Campus Office for Information
Technology, or the Experimental Bulletin Board Service.
internet: laUNChpad.unc.edu or 152.2.22.80
-McDaniel
..........................
: Henry McDaniel III : "Hello shadow my old friend. . . "
: McDaniel Communications :
: PO BOX 28964 : .............................
: Seattle WA. 98118, USA :...:. Founder & Chief engineer :
.......................... : of The Stellar Genesis :
: : MUD project :
: THIS SPACE FOR RENT :..........................
: call 976.FIFI :
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......................
"Its time we met and talked... again."
This has got to be a joke. The advertising industry would never allow a
product such as this come on the market. They would buy the patent as
soon as it was filed and never produce one. The oil companies do a similar
thing whenever someone invents a 200-mile-per-gallon carbuator (I know
someone who was paid quite a sum of money for his patent).
--
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Josh Carpman | Atheist / Furry fan / Lazy person
Rice U. BSChE '94 | *** DARE TO BE TRUE *** M.A. '90
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Well, I for one thought the original post for this product fit right into
this newsgroup. I thank him for bringing it to my attention. I wish more
people would learn to chill. It was just a harmless post providing a
service that fit right in with our group. Things like that just makes the
group more well rounded. I'm not flaming or anything, I just hate to see
such adament replies about nothing. That's just my opinion. i a
--
---
" I just want to be Bavarian for one | Ernie Williamson
brief, shining moment! Is that so | (The Frankwannabe)
wrong? " TV's Frank | se...@netcom.com
>This has got to be a joke. The advertising industry would never allow a
>product such as this come on the market. They would buy the patent as
>soon as it was filed and never produce one. The oil companies do a similar
>thing whenever someone invents a 200-mile-per-gallon carbuator (I know
>someone who was paid quite a sum of money for his patent).
Must explain why all them mod'ren cars are fuel-in-jected.
* PLONK! *
--
c...@rocket.sw.stratus.com --If you believe that I speak for my company,
OR c...@vos.stratus.com write today for my special Investors' Packet...
--
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
suburbia.apana.org.au
Suburbia Public Access Unix - 24 Hr Internet Connection - +61 3 596 8366
===============================================================================
1. It actually records the ads. What the hell is the use of this?
The ads are still there, so you don't save any tape.
2. The ads will still show if you play it on someone else's VCR
3. There are VCR's (I think Blaupunkt make one) that actually cut
out ads in the recording: save tape, no pause during ads, no FF
4. Why the hell would you pay $179!!!!!!! for something to press FF
for you and clutter up your room. The post should have been called:
WATCH TV COMMERCIAL _FOR_ FREE, PAY $179 NOT TO (OR FF IT)
Michelene
mc...@netcom.com
Don't use such a device while watching "Frasier" (anyone who watches it
knows what I mean).
--GW
Wait, if there are frames of black BETWEEN commercials...
gUNthEr
jra...@gozer.idbsu.edu
Bill Godfrey aka A smarmy, British, git, who hates adverts and almost the
entire output of ITV, Channel 4 and sattelite/cable channels, but loves
BBC tv.
P.S. To whoever orginally posted this orginal article missed out
alt.fan.monty-python.
--
+------------[ Bill Godfrey is the Big Furry Hamster! ]-------------+
| Oh, Mr Belpit, your legs are so swolen. |
+--------+-------[ JANET - godf...@uk.ac.cov.cch ]-------+--------+
+------[ INTERNET - godf...@cch.cov.ac.uk ]------+
I have been informed that Red Dwarf shows in America on public
(ad free) TV, in Britain on the BBC (ad free) and here in Australia
on the ABC (ad free). So none of us have any need for it - RD _IS_
ad - fre. Does anyone live in a country where RD has commercials?
Yes I do. I live in Canada. The only channel that carries RD is YTV
and they have lots of commercials. That's why the rat-bastards have to cut the
shows as well. Therefore not only do they have ads they also do brutal hack jobs
on the episodes and we miss some scenes. Thank goodness a kind soul in Az. sent
me all six seasons of the un-edditted episodes (you know who you are...thanks
again). By the way though, I can get up of the couch and hit the ol' ff button
when the ads come on anyways, so why blow $200. :-)
AVC