Fic: "The Buffy Effect...VIII..." Part I...
reg...@aol.com
PG 13
Disclaimer: No, Joss, no...I make no claims, put that thing down!
It's all yours and ME's.
Spoilers for Angel to this week...Flee at once!...
Summary: Similar to my Immortal Beloved series of sketches, and my
Semi Parallel Lives bits mostly just short brainstorming ideas for
other tales...As with both of those, some bits may be multipart,
others just a few lines...
Part I...
Fortius, frowning at his greatest, former star…Queen of the
Hippodrome, Augusta and Consort of the greatest…If not perhaps best-
loved…Imperator since Augustus…
Can’t say the blonde really suits her…
“You say you seek your twin?...” he said slowly… “And you believe she
may be acting with Belisarius?...”
“Not necessarily of her own free will…But yes, I think Justy’s…Er, the
Augustus’ good friend and our national hero of the moment…Is up to
something involving her special abilities…”
“Which abilities are similar to your own?...” he eyed her…
“Identical…Not unheard of, eh…Watcher?...” she smiled…
“No…” Fortius nodded slowly… “As we know all too well, Slayers have
coexisted before…But you haven’t died?...Recently?....”
“Not since North Africa…” she put up a hand…
***
“You…” Anne fumed as the Augustus, solitary, entered the corridor in
front of the cell in which the Buffies in their current state, that of
the Augusta minus Slayer power and two female inmates in rather
decrepit as well as utterly human condition sat, trying to brainstorm
a plan of attack…Anne rather miffed that her own brilliant suggestion
to seduce the first guard in range of her charms and strangle him in
the cell had not been gratefully accepted…
“Ladies…” he sighed… “Believe me, I truly didn’t wish to have to do it
this way…”
“Where are our bodies, you miserable son of a bitch…?!” Previous cried…
A slight but distinct tone of hurt…
How could a William…?
“Safe…Ladies, this is for your own protection as much as mine or my
wife’s…”
“Oh?...” Buffy said, stepping to the bars between her and him…
“You would’ve tried to escape, likely succeeded, and we might have
been forced to employ extreme measures…This is only a temporary state,
you’ll be returned to your bodies as soon as we’ve secured what we
need from your other sister and your philosopher…”
“Justy…” Anne tried… “Don’t leave me locked up in here with these two
vengeance-seeking, wrathful bitches…You wouldn’t want me hurt?...”
“Yeah…” Buffy moved to Anne… “And we may only be human now but we
could do mucho hurt…”
“Absolutely…” Previous had taken the hint and come over as well…Though
her missing teeth made her attempt at an ironic smile a bit less
effective…
“Girls…” Justinian frowned… “You know you won’t hurt your own…”
“…demon?...” Buffy noted… “We were gonna stake her if she gave us any
trouble…Breaking a few bones is no biggee…” she picked up an old, worn
stool…
“I know your wife’s retired from the stage but still she probably
won’t appreciate having her pretty face rearranged…” she swung the
stool between her hands…
“William!...” Anne pleaded… “They’re not kidding!...Don’t let them
hurt me!!...Get me outta here, please!!...”
He sighed… “Guards…” he waved a hand…Four stepped in from the door to
the corridor outside…Two pulling swords, one a spear targeted on Buffy…
Flavius the forth, in command… “Take the Augusta’s body to the other
cell there…”
“Hey!...I’m the whatever…Augusta…My husband’s gone mad…Get me outta
here and…” Anne cried…Flavius opening the door and with a sword sweep,
forcing Previous and Buffy back to the rear…The two bearing swords
stepping into the open cell, carefully eyeing the two Buffies…
Sounds like those stories Procopius tells are true after all, one
thought…
“Come along, demon…” Flavius frowned at Anne…The spearman thrusting
slightly at her…
“Hey, don’t any of you guys wanna be Emperor?!...And do an
Empress?...” she tried, backing from the spear…Flavius seizing her
arm… “Oww!!...” she howled…
“Not too rough, Flavius…” Justinian called…
“No, Augustus…” he nodded…
“Oww!!…Oww!!...Honey, he’s hurtin’ me!!!...” Anne sobbed as Flavius
pulled her out of the cell… “I’m back in the body, honey!...The spell
failed…Justy, it’s me…” Flavius removed her gripping hands from the
bars carefully and lifting her in his arms, carried her out over his
shoulder like a sack as she began screaming, twisting, pounding on the
unflinching shoulders of the tribune… “Sweetheart!!...Tell him to put
me down…Justy, I wouldn’t lie to you!!...I can prove it!!!...You put
me down, you…!” Flavius nodded for the spearman following behind him
to open the other cell…
“She’ll kill herself if you don’t let us go!...” Buffy called…The
swordsmen keeping her and Previous at bay…Looking over where Anne now
stared at her from Flavius’ back…
I’ll what?...
“The hell I will!!...” Anne glared… “Justy, I’m your little Theo…Come
on, baby...” she pleaded… “Let me prove it!!...” Flavius set her down
and stepping back and out of the cell, closed it with a clang…
“Honey!!...” she ran to the bars… “Lovey, please…I musta lost my
Slayer strength from the spell…You gotta believe me, babe!…”
“Fine…” Justinian sighed…Flavius signaling the swordsmen to leave
Buffy and Previous and step out… “What did I say to you when we met
that first day?...”
Ummn…Anne desperately rummaged…Damn…Not a single Theodora memory…She
took everything, bitch…
“Uh…That was a long time ago, honey… ‘You’re the hottest thing I’ve
ever seen, let’s go make out’…?”
“That was the third thing…” he smiled… “Though not quite like that…I’m
afraid, miss, that she retained her memories with the transfer…”
“No…I was thinkin’ of that…Give me one more chance…” she demanded…
“The first time we fought, you said you’d be going out… ‘for a walk,
b***…’?” eager smile…
“Second time…Nice try, though…” Justinian smiled…
“Oh, fine…” Anne fumed… “Well, bring me something to eat at least…
I’m…” she paused in a bit of wonder… “Hungry…God, in fact…I’m
starved…”
Geesh…I haven’t been hungry for food in…Well, never since my rebirth…
she thought…
“Flavius?...” Justinian turned to him…
“Yeah, a nice steak?...And maybe some bread?...And cheese…And some
nice salad?...” Anne called…
“Have the Imperial kitchens fix whatever she wants…” Justinian told
the tribune…
“And some soup?...I like…Hmmn…”Anne pondered… Been so long…?
“Tomato bisque, maybe?...And do you guys have cheesecake?...”
***
“So you don’t have the device with you?...” Procopius frowned at
Warren…Belisarus glaring as well…Antonia, in her chair, satirical look…
No others, even the ubiquitous slaves allowed to attend this meeting
in the master’s study…
“No…The other ladies preferred to keep it with them…” Warren
explained…
Morons…Would I be sitting here in a land where people die of a cold at
25 and there’s not a processor to be had if I didn’t have to?...
“Not good news…” Belisarius eyed Procopius… “But…” he turned back to
Warren… “…you say you created it?...Could you reproduce it?...”
Ah, hah…Right…Like in say four or five hundred years if I gain
Immortality and you give me carte blanche to spend every penny this
miserable “empire” of yours can cough up…And I can somehow reinvent
the entire spectra of modern industrial technology from steel
production to microchip manufacturing…
“Absolutely…” he nodded, confident look… “But it would take time…I’d
say it would be a lot faster if we got it from the girls…”
A lot faster…he thought…
“Who are currently under lock and key in the Imperial dungeons…”
Procopius noted… “Excepting of course your ‘sister’…Currently under
our care…”
“Surely the women have been searched and their device secured…”
Belisarus shook his head… “Justinian wouldn’t miss a trick like that…”
“More than likely…” Procopius nodded… “But that’s not necessarily a
disaster…We do have friends in the Palace…”
“Well, then…Lets get our ‘friends’ movin’ and get my transit system…”
Warren rose…
“How do we know this clown is what he claims to be?...”Antonia,
sweetly, eyeing Warren… “He could be nothing but a miserable slave in
his world…And comic relief to boot…Leading us on, thanks to you,
Procopius…While his owners make off…Besides, I’m still not convinced
in them and their future, other world, simply because the girl looks a
bit like the Augusta…”
Hey…Warren glared…
“Speaking of not being convinced in one…” Procopius began, with some
heat…Fuming… “If your husband hadn’t insisted on your being allowed to
attend here…”
“Procopius…” Belisarus eyed him…
God, the last thing I need right now…
“For all we know you are reporting everything to your old friend, the
Augusta…” the white-haired Procopius had turned beet red in the face…
Antonia for her part rising to her feet, fists up…
Oooh…Little rift among friends here…Warren thought…Useful to bear in
mind…
“Now, now…Friends…” Belisarius rose to put hands out to hold the two
apart…
“Old fool…” Antonia fumed… “Putting us all at risk over a wretch’s
fairy tale…”
“I’ve seen their power, you…” Procopius, raging… “And the only one
endangering us is you…”
“Enough, Procopius…” Belisarus, hastily…Realizing matter were about to
move to discussion of Antonia’s past career and perhaps present flaws…
“Antonia has a point…We’ve not seen any proof of the power this fellow
claims to wield…” he pointed out…But put up a hand… “I don’t deny what
you saw but our lives may be at risk in this…”
“People, people…Friends, Romans…Whatever you are…” Warren called…
“Lend me your eyes and have a gander, here…” he pulled a ballpoint pen
from a pocket in the trousers he wore under his tunic and robes…
“Behold, yokels…” he pulled up a small scrap of white paper from his
pocket and began to write “Warren Mears, the new God…” in what he was
fairly certain, particularly from the puzzled and astounded looks, was
English, not Greek…
Though except for the history buff geezer, he doubted anyone else in
the room…The wife who was apparently a retired strumpet or whatever
and the heroic muscle-bound military boy…Could read Greek, let alone
English…
Hmmn, pity it’s not a clicker pen…They’ve probably never seen a spring
before…
“What is that?...” Procopius stared as the blue ink traced letters on
the sheet of what appeared to be silken parchment or cloth…
“I call it…The pen…And ‘tis mightier than the finest sword…” Warren
beamed…
“I invented it myself…” he noted, smiling….
“Nice…” Antonia eyed the pen…Suddenly snatching it from his hand…
Hey…
“Antonia…” Belisarus frowned…
“Oh, get hold of yourself, Bel…This thing is just some kind of…” she
eyed the pen’s barrel…
“…Clear amber?...” she held it up to a window… “With some paint inside…
A nice toy, but…”
“And this?... “ Procopius held up the white paper… “If you can tell me
where fine parchment like this…” he bent the scrap…Unfolded it… “That
can endure such manipulations…Exists…We could probably buy the Empire
in a short time…”
She stared… Belisarus eyed her…Hmmn?...Warren, though a bit miffed at
all the seizing of personal property, deeming it best to let the
monkeys have their see…
She shrugged… “It’s unusual but hardly proof this fellow comes from
the future…Anywhere…And it’s hardly something to bring down Justinian
with…”
“Bring down…?” Belisarus frowned… “I thought I’ve made it clear…We are
simply gaining leverage to persuade the Augustus to make a few reforms
and heed our advice…And see to it that should he die a proper
successor is named and ready to prevent the disaster of a woman coming
to power alone…The Augustus is to remain and we to be his most loyal
subjects and advisors…I’m no friend to treason…Rome has suffered
enough from ambitious, selfish men trying to seize power for their own
interests…Justinian stays on his throne…We are clear on that…?”
Hmmn…Antonia frowned…But…
“Yeah…”
“Certainly, sir…” Procopius eyeing her…
Guess we have common ground on one thing, anyway…she thought… “Fine…
But getting back to… ‘Cicero’…here…”
“Just a moment…” Warren interrupted… “I’ve saved the best for last…”
Nice way of expressing himself the lad has…Belisarus eyed him… “…’the
best for last…’ ‘pen(? yes...pen) mightier than the sword…’ ‘Friends,
Romans, whatever…lend me your eyes…’ I could use him on my speech for
the triumph today…
Warren pulled a small black rectangle out from under his toga…
“Guards…” Antonia backed away… Now that had the look of a weapon, even
if a rather flimsy one…
“Hey…Not to worry…” Warren raised a hand… “This is just my device for
making calculations of incredible complexity in record time…Powered by
the energy of the sun…” he moved to the window…The calculator’s LCD
lit up in green…
Whoa…Belisarus and Procopius stared…Antonia cautiously coming to them
and peering…
“Let’s see…How about?...” Warren pondered… “You have, say, 112 slaves
doing 25 things, say making those lousy smoky candles you have here at
night .. In an hour working for 8 hours…How many candles in a day…” he
punched in the numbers… “And here’s your answer...” he held up the
machine…
“What is that?...” Procopius stared at the unfamiliar number…
Ummn… “22,400 candles…” Warren noted…
Antonia looking round…Hmmn…
“I see no candles…”
“No, it’s the number of candles…It’s a calculation…” Stupid…
Nice to know modern blondes haven’t regressed from some high plateau
of intellectual ability…
“Those represent numbers?...” Procopius tapped the screen… “I must
admit…If your figures are right, quite a feat…” He strode to the study
door… “Benvo!?...My abacus…”
“This may take a bit…” he noted, setting himself down at the large
table in the center of the study around which the others sat…Abacus
before him…
Lovely…Warren sighed…
“While you’re running the ole Commodore 64…” he began…
The three stared at him…
Forget it, he waved it off… “What about dear ole ‘sis’?...Have you got
her under proper lock and key?...Cause if you don’t…I can promise
you…”
“Warren…” Belisarus beamed… “We Romans know how to handle troublesome
women…”
Oh yeah…Sure…Procopius rolled eyes…Brief glance at Antonia’s smugly
wry smile at him…
Still, in this case…
“Benvo!...” Procopius called… “Have your…Wife…Bring the wine…”
Warren eyed the smug looks on the Romans cautiously…
Nah…These clowns?...Nah…
“Master…” Third Buffy bowed, entering…Glassy look… “Benvo my husband
said to bring you and the guests…Wine…” she tottered a bit…Lifting a
wine jug…
“Right here, girl…” Belisarus held out his glass…She slowly stumbled
over, pouring…
“Mind that jug, you silly wretch…” Antonia called… “Or it’s the whip
for you…Procopius, you ought to trade this one away…”
“Oh…No…Please…” Third Buffy vaguely pleaded… “Not from my…Husband…
Please…Master…”
“Not to fear, girl…Just try and learn your duties well…” Procopius,
kindly tone…
“Back to the sweepin’, wife…” Benvo told her as they went out of the
room… “And look sharp or it’ll be a hiding for you…Master…” he bowed…
She bowed, clumsily…
Hmmn…Warren pondered…Looking after her…
Have my moment of pleasure in the vague hope she won’t remember when
the…Drugs?...Wear…Or do the sensible thing and make noises about
injustice to cover my ass…?
“Nice job…Magics or drugs?…Or both?...” he asked…
“A formulation from the lotus flower and other ingredients that blinds
memory…And induces susceptibility…Not useful in your case, but
excellent for her…” Procopius noted… “And one of my slaves, a Greek
girl from Athens, is very good at dealing with the susceptible…A
unique gift, really….”
“Can’t believe she’s not faking…She really believes she’s one of your
slaves and that pus-faced little package Benvo’s her…” chuckle…
“Husband?...You can do that and you need help with the Emperor and his
girl?...” Warren, forgetting a moment where his best interests lay…
Keeping these bozos believing he and only he could win them Imperial
power…
“Oh, yes…But you see, the Augustus, Augusta, and the whole Imperial
staff have long ago taken antidote in formidable concentrations…
Routine thing for the Imperial service…Besides we need to armies…Not a
few” Procopius noted, sliding some round balls on his abacus… “Of
course we can’t push it too far…And that reminds me… “ he rose…Went to
the door… “Hera!!...”
“Lord?...” a buxom, red-haired lady in white robes and headpiece came
to the study door, waiting…
“Tell that idiot Benvo to leave his ‘wife’ be…As I instructed…He’s to
tell her that she’s been ill and they‘ve pledged themselves to
chastity for the next six months as a thanks for the blessings of
Christ…Make sure he does that in no uncertain terms…You are her
dearest friend among the slaves and are nursing her while she
completes her recovery of her mental faculties…Meaning you can stay
with her and watch them both…Understood?...”
“Yes, Lord…” she bowed…
Pity…Warren thought…I thought they made such a nice couple…
***
Fortius sighed at the angry face of the tall, brown-haired girl in
blue robe now facing the transferred Theodora…Cross in one hand, cross-
bow in the other…
“Claudia…”
“Demon from Hell, a vaunt!...” she cried, waving cross at Theodora…Who
sighed but looked to Fortius…
“Claudia…This is my friend…And a rather important personage…” he
tried…
“What?...” his apprentice…Skilled yet a tad underexperienced, he noted
to Theodora…Stared at the blonde demon in human form before her…Having
risen out of her seat in the back room to the attack on seeing
Fortius’ charms in his ‘study’ vibrate to indicate a demonic presence
in the front shop… “Master Fortius, this be a demon…However pleasing
to you her form may be…The warning system…”
“Yes, yes…” Fortius nodded… “And I commend you, Claudia for your
attentiveness…You will make a fine Watcher one day…But you must sense
deeper…There is a soul presence here as well…Concentrate and you will
sense that…”
“I truly am Fortius’ friend, girl…” Theodora nodded… “Don’t fear,
though I heartily second your master in commendation for your
alertness…”
“Truly, Master?...” Claudia looked to Fortius… “Truly, girl…Rest easy…
And look a bit more closely…The lady is not unknown to you…”
Claudia, rather near-sighted, squinted…Oh-oh…I think I have seen…
“My greatest protégé…Our Slayer…And Augusta of the Roman Empire…” he
smiled…
“Hello, girl…” Theodora smiled…”No fear…You’ve done your duty…Now, let
your master and I talk, eh?...”
“And to your books, Claudia…” Fortius told the girl sternly… “With no
word of this to anyone…”
“Yes, Master Fortius…” Claudia nodded…Eyeing Theodora… “Be the blonde
demon a disguise, most noble Augusta?...”
“Indeed, girl…And I count on you to follow your master’s dictate and
say nothing of me…” Theodora nodded, sternly…
“Ma’am…Master…” Claudia bowed and headed back…
Well, Slayer or no, everyone do say she be demon incarnate…she
thought…
“Glad to see you caught the demon…” Theodora smiled at Fortius… “I
assume you had stake and cross at ready all the time…”
“Naturally…” he nodded… “But your soul has a distinctive aura for me,
girl…And now that my dear apprentice is safely off to her studies…Just
what insanity has prompted you to take a demon’s body and risk seeking
me out, knowing the Council has sanctioned you…?”
“Rome’s good…” Theodora sighed… “And the knowledge that my old Watcher
would not betray me, even to his beloved Council…”
***
Oh , God…Anne gasped…Her bosom in lovely purple robe girt with gold
chain heaving…Eyes rolling in ecstasy
God, Almighty…
Geesh did I just pray, more or less?...Damn, I am in a human shell…
“Good?...” Justinian asked, smiling…
“Incredible…Oh, sweetie…” she moaned… “I haven’t had it like that
since…Well, since I was human…But I don’t remember specifics from then
so…I guess, ever…”
Oh, brother…Buffy rolled her eyes…Previous shaking head…
“Well, being in a sense your husband…And counterpart of this William
you all seem to adore…” he grinned… “I’m pleased to be of service…”
“Baby…” Anne smiled…Ummn…
“Could I have a little more of that honey cake?...” she pointed
through her bars to the table on which a feast of epic proportions
laid spread…
“Absolutely…” he beamed…Pulling the dish over… “But don’t make
yourself ill…”
Or elephantine…Buffy thought, frowning…
God, tell me I don’t chow like that when I’m hungry…
“What?...” Anne had caught her sisters’ mutual disapproving stare…
“I’ll have you two know I haven’t eaten food except a little to try
and fool Dawn and Willow the second night after I transformed…And the
occasional burger to keep company with Spike when he watched soccer
matches on TV… In three years…Besides, it’s not my body…Permanently…
And she’ll be a Slayer again when she retakes it…So big blowhardies…”
she flounced away from them…
Blowhardies?... Previous blinked…
“Thanks, darling…” she beamed at Justinian as he handed her a plate of
cake through the bars…
“How’s about sex later?...After I digest a little?...” she asked,
hopefully…
“Afraid not…Tempting as it truly is…” he smiled…
“Oh, come on…It’s your wife’s body…Voluntarily handed over…” Anne
noted, seductive leer… “She must have figured we’d get it on…”
“She figured, as you say…” Justinian grinned… “That you’d offer…And
her statement on that was quite Imperial and rather unrepeatable…”
“What she doesn’t know…” Anne teased, munching on the cake…Swilling
down some wine from a bottle…
“She’d know, believe me…” Justinian shook his head… “No, thank you…It
is very tempting but I’ll manage for one night…”
“Without me?...”Anne, heartfelt plea…Sincere stare…Tears in eyes…
Buffy and Previous staring…Whoa…
“You are very good…” Justinian eyed her, smiling… “I can see you must
have been a terrible menace on your world…”
“Devastating…And God, could I show you…” Anne smiled…
“Lady Anne…I hope you do find and save your William…” Justinian
replied… “Tell him, if you do, his counterpart hopes he should be
truly grateful…”
“He is…” Anne agreed… “Even his demon is…So I know…”
“I’d better go now, before you manage to melt even my icy heart…” he
grinned…
“She’s lucky…Honestly…” Anne said, simply…”Sleep well, love…” she blew
a kiss…Swig of wine, gulping…Ahh, that’s so…Belch… “’cuse…” she wiped
her mouth with sleeve…
“Ladies…” he nodded to Buffy and Previous… “Please don’t do anything
foolish…Flavius and your own counterparts will be with the guards…I
swear to you on the Holy Testament that I will keep my promise to
restore you and send you on your way safely when all’s settled…” They
eyed him coolly…
“I’ll…mmphf…Keep an eye on ‘em, honey!...” Anne called, between
mouthfuls of bread…
He bowed to them all and stepped out of the chamber…The large door at
the end of the corridor swinging rustily open to allow him exit, then
slamming…
“ ‘Sleep well, love.’?” Previous frowned through the bars at Anne…
“So, I like him…Besides if Theo bites it, I might decide I like it
here…” she replied… “He’s a Will, after all…”
“What about Spike?…Your Spike?...” Buffy frowned…
“Just bein’ practical…If we can’t leave and I have to stay in this bod
anyway…It’s what he’d want, you know that…” Anne noted…Shrugging…
“Though yeah, he’d still want me to go and get that soul back…And
maybe…If Justy asked nice…” she smiled, a bit fondly…Looking to the
banquet table outside her cell… “Say, uh, Flavius?...Another slice of
that lamb, please?...With lots of that sauce…What is it?...”
“Garum, demon…” Flavius replied, curtly from his seat near the wall…
Fetching a plate and signaling for the nervous cook from the Imperial
kitchen to slice yet another piece…
“Right…Lots of that, ok?...”
Jesus Christos, where does she put it?... The cook blinked at Anne…
“What did Justinian mean…Your counterparts?...” Previous asked…
“Not…?”
“Be prepared for some major humiliation, gals…”Anne grinned… “Lots of
drool…More than your usual, dumber even than you two normally are…And
be very glad our pious Mr. Flavius is in charge tonight…Cause
otherwise when you do find Will, you might have some ‘plainin’ to do
about the buns in the ovens…”
***