Animaniacs Fan Purity Test version 4.0 (part 2)
David Kendall
Section VI: Miscellaneous Strange Questions that Don't Fit Anywhere Else
VI.1. Have you ever said, "Boingy! Boingy! Boingy!" while walking in
public?
VI.1.a. ...while making love?
VI.2. Do you quote Animaniacs in conversation?
VI.2.a. ...more than once a day?
VI.2.b. ...besides "Helloooo, nurse!" or <smack> "Goodnight, everybody!"?
VI.3. Do you quote Animaniacs to people who have never seen it?
VI.4. Do you like beans?
VI.5. Do you like George Wendt?
VI.6. Do you eat beans during George Wendt movies?
VI.7. Would you like to see a movie about George Wendt eating beans?
VI.8. Do you like eating beans with George Wendt?
VI.9. Were you waiting for those questions to pop up?
VI.10. Would you have hunted me down and exacted revenge had those
questions
not been included?
VI.11. Have you ever been sued by Warner Bros.?
VI.11.a. ...for something other than the contents of your web site?
VI.12. Have you ever been to Burbank?
VI.12.a. ...was it because of Animaniacs that you went?
VI.12.b. ...did you take a picture of the WB lot water tower?
VI.12.c. ...did you attempt to climb the water tower and look inside?
VI.12.d. ...did you alter it in any way?
VI.12.e. ...did you march outside the front gate of the studio with a
"Free
the Warner Brothers and the Warner Sister" picket sign?
VI.12.e.i. ...did the Warners come out of the tower and complain about the
racket?
VI.12.e.i.A. ...did you get their autograph?
VI.12.e.i.B. ...if you did, will you give it to me? I'm willing to pay.
VI.13. Have you ever gone alpine skiing?
VI.13.a. ...in the winter?
VI.13.a.i. ...was it a Good Idea (tm)?
VI.13.b. ...in the summer?
VI.13.b.i. ...was it a Bad Idea (tm)?
VI.14. Will you use the results of this test to try to impress people?
VI.15. Would the people you hang around with be impressed by your score on
this test?
VI.16. Have you ever administered this test to a decided non-fan?
VI.17. Have you ever guessed what your score will be and got it right?
VI.17.a. ...was it the exact number?
VI.18. Have you ever tried to improve your score on this test?
VI.18.a. ...by adding questions which you can pass?
VI.18.b. ...by memorizing long lists?
VI.18.c. ...by spending lots of money?
VI.18.d. ...as part of an elaborate plan to take a break?
VI.18.e. ...by doing all of the above?
VI.19. Did you write this test?
VI.19.a. ...as part of an elaborate plan to take over the world while
everyone
is busy testing themselves?
VI.20. Are you the current maintainer of this test?
VI.21. Have you ever contributed a question to this test by sending your
suggestion to bd...@cco.caltech.edu or weir...@mbnet.mb.ca?
VI.21.a. ...strictly for the bonus points?
VI.21.b. ...was it added to the test?
VI.21.c. ...more than one question?
VI.21.c.i. ...More than 10?
VI.21.c.ii. ...More than 20?
VI.21.c.iii. ...got a little too much free time, do we?
VI.22. Have you ever written a question #21 in a message sent to
bd...@cco.caltech.edu or weir...@mbnet.mb.ca suggesting additions to the
Animanaics Fan
Purity Test just so you can get a point for the "...contributed over
20?" question?
VI.23. 5 bonus points if it was considered too ridiculous to be included.
VI.23.a. 10 bonus points if VI.23 applies, AND it was something that you'd
actually done.
VI.24. Has this test made such an impact on your life that you feel
compelled to complain to weir...@mbnet.mb.ca about it?
VI.24.a. ...don't you think a p-sychiatrist would be more able to help you
resolve your issues?
VI.24.b. ...did you know that weir...@mbnet.mb.ca is not a licensed
p-sychiatrist?
VI.24.b.i. ...did you know that Dr. Otto Scratchansniff is?
VI.24.b.i.A. ...did you mail Dr. Otto Scratchansniff?
VI.24.b.i.A.I. ...did you get a reply?
VI.24.b.i.A.II. ...were you cured?
VI.25. After taking this test, did you find out that you'd gotten
the lowest recorded score ever?
VI.26. After taking this test, did you find out that you'd gotten the
highest recorded
score ever?
VI.27. Did you know that your self-worth is not contingent upon how well
you do on this test?
VI.28. Have you ever mailed weir...@mbnet.mb.ca just to tell him to get a
life?
VI.28.a. ...did you fully comprehend the irony of such a request?
VI.28.b. ...would you consider doing so after reading this past series of
questions?
VI.29.c. ...did you mail him after pondering the irony of it?
VI.30. Have you ever been offended by a question on this test?
VI.30.a. ...would you like to take a long walk off a short pier?
VI.30.b. ...would you be interested in performing certain anatomically
impossible actions deemed unairable by the Fox censors?
VI.31. Have you ever inspired other people to write questions about you?
VI.32. Do you consider any of the characters to be your role model?
VI.33. When faced with a difficult decision do you resolve it by thinking,
"What would <character> do?"
VI.33.a. 1 bonus point if the character you chose was Wakko, Pinky or
Slappy.
VI.33.b. 2 bonus points if the character you chose was Mr. Skullhead.
VI.33.c. 3 bonus points if the character you chose was Chicken Boo.
VI.34. Do you have any friends that work at Warner Bros.?
VI.34.a. ...have you met them in person?
VI.35. Have you met Tress, Jess, or Rob?
VI.35.a. ...more than once?
VI.35.b. ...more than five times?
VI.35.c. ...did you travel more than four hours to get there?
VI.35.c.i. ...by bus?
VI.35.c.ii. ...during a storm that killed at least half a dozen people?
VI.35.d. ...did they know you already?
VI.35.e. ...did you become a groupie and tag along with the Animaniacs
World
Tour?
VI.35.e.i. ...did they hire you afterwards?
VI.36. Did you brag to Rob, Jess, and Tress that you had every episode on
tape?
VI.36.a. ...were they impressed?
VI.37. Did you offer copies of your tapes to them because they hadn't
taped
the episodes yet themselves?
VI.38. Did they ask if you were on Internet?
VI.38.a. ...without you giving them any hints that you were?
VI.38.b. ...did you admit it?
VI.39. Have you ever met Mo?
VI.39.a. ...did he give you his home address?
VI.40. Do you worship Rob Paulsen?
VI.40.a. ...can you recognize him just by his voice?
VI.40.a.i. ...even Dr. Scratchansniff?
VI.40.b. ...can you remember every cartoon he's done?
VI.40.b.i. ...before 1990?
VI.40.b.ii. ...with Tress?
VI.40.b.iii. ...with Jess?
VI.40.b.iv. ...does he?
VI.41. Can you name the show where he played a blue-haired character with
a Clint Eastwood-
ish voice?
VI.41.a. ...can you give the name of the original Japanese version of the
show?
VI.41.a.i. ...in Japanese?
VI.42. Have you ever taken a tour of Warner Bros. Animation?
VI.42.a. ...did you talk to anyone?
VI.42.b. ...did you notice any of your posts on the wall?
VI.43. Have you ever appeared in an episode?
VI.43.a. ...besides "Please, Please, Please Get A Life Foundation"?
VI.43.b. ...did you know about it?
VI.44. Did you ever apply for a job at Warner Bros.?
VI.44.a. ...did they hire you?
VI.44.a.i. ...as soon as you walked in the door?
VI.44.a.ii. ...was this the job interview from III.16.e.ii?
VI.45. Wanna see me make bubbles with my spit?
VI.46. Have you ever called Fox, Warner Bros., or the WB?
VI.46.a. ...to tell them about how great Animaniacs is?
VI.46.b. ...to get some inside information?
VI.46.c. ...to get new episodes?
VI.46.d. ...to get something nobody else has so you can brag about
VI.47. Do you have copies of the unreleased episodes?
VI.47.a. ...did someone owe you a favor?
VI.47.a.i. ...do they still owe you more?
VI.48. Have you ever argued about the theme song lyrics?
VI.48.a. ...were you right?
VI.48.b. ...did you call the writer to clear things up?
VI.49. Do you like Wakko's new gookie?
VI.50. Do you know why hot dogs come in packages of 10 and hot dog buns in
packages of 8?
VI.51. Have you made an Animaniacs fan out of someone?
VI.51.a. ...more than 5 people?
VI.51.b. ...more than 10?
VI.51.c. ...everyone you know?
VI.51.d. ...everyone you encounter?
VI.52. Are you annoyed that your favorite characters aren't mentioned in
the
theme?
VI.52.a. ...have you tried to get someone to change this?
VI.52.a.i. ...did they try?
VI.53. Have you ever requested an Animaniacs song on the radio?
VI.53.a. ...did it get played?
VI.53.a.i. ...did it become a popular song after?
VI.54. Do you play Animaniacs songs while driving?
VI.54.a. ...to work every day?
VI.54.b. ...while traveling?
VI.54.c. ...while cruising?
VI.55. Does your car's license plate contain the name of an Animaniacs
character?
VI.56. Have you ever named your car (or other form of transportation)
after a character?
VI.57. Do you have a complete collection indexed by shows relevant to any
given topic?
VI.57.a. ...do you use the index to illustrate points with clips from
Animaniacs when you have friends over to your house?
VI.57.b. ...do you bring the tapes with you so can illustrate points at
your
friend's houses?
VI.57.c. ...do you bring them everywhere so you can illustrate points no
matter
where you go?
VI.57.d. ...do you deliberately start conversations that have relevant
allusions
in Animaniacs just so you can show the clips?
VI.58. Do you have a crush on any of the characters?
VI.58.a. 1 bonus point if you have a crush on Dot.
VI.58.b. 1 bonus point if you have a crush on Wakko.
VI.58.c. 2 bonus points if you have a crush on Rita.
VI.58.d. 2 bonus points if you have a crush on Yakko.
VI.58.e. 3 bonus points if you have a crush on Slappy.
VI.58.f. 10 bonus points if you have a crush on the Godpigeon.
VI.59. Have you ever written WB to get the character's phone number?
VI.59.a. ...did you call the character?
VI.59.a.i. ...did you get a date?
VI.59.a.i.A. ...did you eat pickled bass?
VI.59.a.i.A.I. ...did you use the correct fork for eating pickled bass?
VI.59.b. 10 bonus points if you called Slappy for a date and the phone
blew up
in your face, you yutz!
VI.60. Do you have an obsession with cartoon characters above real people?
VI.60a. ...and do you refuse to seek professional help and get a real
girl/boyfriend?
VI.60.b. ...would it be impossible for someone like you to get a real
girl/boyfriend anyway?
VI.61. Do you try to guess all the Bad Ideas?
VI.62. Do you ever guess right? [Only counts the first time you see it!]
VI.63. Do you always guess right?
VI.64. Do you compose your own "Good Ideas, Bad Ideas"?
VI.65. Did you start watching every episode of TTA to check for writers,
characters, actors, etc. who crossed over to Animaniacs even though
you weren't really a Tiny Toons fan before?
VI.66. Did you check out the names and dates of all the Buddy cartoons
mentioned in the anniversary special?
VI.67. Did you get copies of the original Buddy cartoons to watch?
VI.68. Have you ever given "Water Tower, Warner Bros. Studio, Burbank CA"
as
your mailing address?
VI.68.a. ...did the letters get to you?
VI.69. Have you ever used "Helloooooo, Nurse!" as a pick up line?
VI.69.a. ...did it work?
VI.70. Have you ever considered the Animaniacs theme song as a replacement
for the national anthem?
VI.71. Have you ever shouted out "...and the Warner Sister," when someone
said "Warner Brothers"?
VI.71.a. ...at a WBSS?
VI.71.b. ...when that someone is on TV?
VI.71.c. ...in a crowded movie theater?
VI.71.d. ...to someone who hasn't heard of Animaniacs?
VI.71.e. ...even though you're a 6' 4", 310 pound factory worker from
Hoboken,
NJ?
VI.72. Have you ever emailed the broadcasters of Animaniacs?
VI.73. Have you ever emailed a foreign broadcaster of Animaniacs?
VI.74. Have you ever written to the broadcasters of Animaniacs?
VI.74.a. ...did you get a reply?
VI.74.a.i. ...by fax?
VI.75. Have you ever had a fax sent to you by another Animaniacs fan 'cos
they thought you would be interested?
VI.76. Are you highly annoyed that your score on this test implies you're
not much of a fan?
VI.76.a. ...will you be losing sleep over this?
VI.76.b. ...will you be losing your job over this?
VI.76.c. ...will you be losing your lunch over this?
VI.76.d. ...will you be losing your sanity over this?
VI.76.d.i. ...have you already lost your sanity?
VI.77. Do you keep anything Animaniacs-related from the
newspaper/magazines, etc., whether
it's an article or a picture of a sing-along video that's being
advertisted for $12.99 at Toys'R'Us?
VI.77.a. ...if you couldn't buy said periodical, were you distraught?
VI.77.a.i. ...did you go to your local library so that you colduld
photocopy the article from said
periodical?
VI.77.a.i.A. ...even though you already knew what it said because someone
posted the contents
on a.t.a?
VI.77.b. ...did you want to write in corrections to blatant errors in the
article?
VI.77.b.i. ...did you actually correct it?
VI.78. Have you ever argued what species the Warners are?
VI.78.a. ...were you right?
VI.79. Have you ever looked for Acme Diet Walnut Soda at the grocery
store?
VI.79.a. ...did they have it?
VI.79.b. ...did you make your own?
VI.79.c. ...did you make your own, print up cans, and distribute it among
your
unsuspecting friends?
VI.79.c.i. ...did they die from poisoning?
VI.80. Have you ever accused anyone who's never watched Animaniacs of
being
a giant chicken?
VI.80.a. ...did they think you were insane?
VI.80.a.i. ...were you already insane[y]?
VI.82.b. ...were they actually a giant chicken?
VI.83. Have you ever driven the Alaska Highway?
VI.83.a. ...just to say you'd gone from Warner, Alberta to Dot Lake,
Alaska?
VI.84. Have you dressed up as an A! character for Halloween?
VI.84.a. ...as Brain?
VI.84.a.i. ...did random strangers come up and ask you what you were doing
tonight?
VI.85. Have you ever dressed as a Warner whether it was Halloween or not?
VI.85.a. ...in a public place?
VI.85.b. ...in a mall?
VI.85.b.i. ...and ridden an escalator?
VI.85.b.i.A. ...near survey ladies?
VI.85.c. ...in an official WB role?
VI.85.d. ...and done the Hokey Pokey on an Ice Rink?
VI.85.d.i. ...and have proof?
VI.85.e. ...and been mistaken for Mickey Mouse?
VI.86. Would you want Randy Beaman as a son?
VI.86.a. ...Katie Ka-boom as a daughter?
VI.86.b. ...Mindy as a daughter?
VI.86.c. ...Slappy as an aunt?
VI.86.d. ...Skippy as a nephew?
VI.86.e. ...Pinky as an assistant?
VI.86.f. ...The Brain as your boss?
VI.87. Would you want to be an Animaniacs character (yourself, not an
existing one)?
VI.87.a. ...even if you could never go back to "real life" again?
VI.87.a.i. ...ESPECIALLY if it meant you could never go back?
VI.87.b. ...even if Slappy would drop anvils on you and blow you up in
every
episode you're on?
VI.87.c. ...even if becoming an Animaniacs character required you to first
spend one year as Elmyra's pet?
VI.88. Would you want Chicken Boo over for dinner?
VI.89. Would you want Chicken Boo *for* dinner?
VI.90. Would you want to be stuck in an elelator with Wakko for over ten
hours?
VI.91. Do you play the piano?
VI.91.a. ...with white gloves that can play by themselves?
VI.92. Do you want to deliver the Warners' Christmas presents this year?
VI.93. Have you ever used the Warners as a mascot for a club?
VI.93.a. ...for a fraternity?
VI.93.b. ...for an organization not mentioned above?
VI.94. Has anybody asked you the question, "What are Animaniacs?"
VI.94.a. ...did you tell them?
VI.94.b. ...did you sing them the theme song?
VI.94.c. ...did you sing all the songs from the show?
VI.94.c.i. ...did they sit there and listen to them all?
VI.95. Do you run a radio show based on Animaniacs?
VI.95.a. ...do you play Animaniacs songs on it?
VI.95.b. ...do you have Animaniacs contests on it?
VI.96. When asked to give the password, do you say "Froinlaven!"?
VI.96.a. ...do you actually know how to spell that word?
VI.96.a.i. ...before I told you just now?
VI.97. Did you actually see the Pirates of Penzance and the H.M.S.
Pinafore
to get the original songs that were parodied in H.M.S. Yakko?
VI.98. Have you ever thought about Animaniacs while in an intimate
situation?
SCORING
Compute the number of "yes" answers you had for sections 1-6, and add any
bonus points. Now find the category you fit into:
0 Mr. Skullhead: Apparently taking this test was a BAD IDEA.
1-25 The Hip Hippos: You're too trendy for cartoons.
26-50 Chicken Boo: B'gark? You keep pecking the channel changer.
51-75 Buttons & Mindy: Your attention span is too short for Animaniacs.
76-100 Goodfeathers: Bada-bing! Another fan!
101-125 Runt: Definitely a good show, definitely.
126-150 Rita: It's almost as hip as you are.
151-175 Skippy: You watch it whenever your aunt is on.
176-200 Slappy: You watch it whenever _you're_ on.
201-225 Pinky: You have to be physically dragged away from the TV.
226-250 Brain: You need just a few more points to achieve world conquest.
251-275 Dot: You think you are related to the Warner Brothers.
276-300 Wakko: You think you _are_ a Warner Brother.
301-325 Yakko: You think you are a Warner Brother, and you have proof.
326-350 Steven: You're an inmate at the Please, Please, Please Get A Life
Foundation.
351+ You're not a Warner, but there's a good chance you're going to be
locked up for 65 years or so.
CREDITS
Additional questions by:
de...@muddcs.cs.hmc.edu (Denis Moskowitz)
ee...@po.cwru.edu (Eric E. Katz)
moi...@bronze.lcs.mit.edu (David Moisan)
bc...@trumpet.aix.calpoly.edu
tad...@mantis.com (Scott Tadman)
sh...@rmii.com (Shane Bodrero)
pe...@127.0.0.1 (Travis T. Scriptman)
Vladimir J. Len" <vlad...@interaccess.com>
xter...@Gallif.VE6mgs.AMpr.Ab.cA (Daffy Duck)
msd...@hellcat.ecn.uoknor.edu (Scott Lagaly)
jason.b...@channel1.com (Jason Bosinoff)
Slakko <dun...@student.adelaide.edu.au>
PAULA O'KEEFE" <POK...@AOAMH4.SSW.DHHS.GOV>
David Thomas Stott <ds...@andrew.cmu.edu>
DOR...@EAGLE.WESLEYAN.EDU (David Orozco)
Jono Nicholson <jo...@acme.demon.co.uk>
bpel...@maestro.mitre.org (Brant Pellett)
James P Kufrovich <jpks...@pitt.edu>
asmi...@127.0.0.1 (Alan Smithee)
Wakko Warner <ph...@s-cwis.unomaha.edu>
Greg Sand (gs...@moon.doane.edu)
Phantasm <jeff...@indiana.edu>
dav...@MIT.EDU
pl...@gallif.ERSYS.EDMONTON.AB.CA (Plato)
SPU...@POMONA.EDU
mku...@eagle.ais.net (Matthew Kurth)
michae...@nla.com (Michael Jones)
jennet...@servcent.org (Jennette Owen)
OdosB...@aol.com (Lara Benton Little)
Erich Schulman (KTN4CA) -- Team OS/2" <ac...@use.usit.net>
Mike Jolly <mjo...@pacifier.com>
Malaka <splu...@abacus.bates.edu>
wood...@io.com (Jonathan Woodward)
Gilbert A. Esquerdo" <esqu...@GAS.UUG.Arizona.EDU>
Good Idea: Reading Zach's Post" <zwh...@efn.org>
Jay Maynard <jmay...@admin5.hsc.uth.tmc.edu>
Runt...@aol.com
Kane Leung <ka...@seas.ucla.edu>
MANNISTO, JESSIE L" <MANN...@clab2.northville.k12.mi.us>
The...@aol.com
spot (jwat...@reed.edu)
Jaime J. Weinman
Rex Wheeler
Lincoln Hills <hil...@eosc.osshe.edu>
Joseph Pfeister <Elwoo...@msn.com>
Heidi Goltz <heidi...@sparky.mps.org>
Ken & Janet Jacobson <k...@pangea.ca>
Mike Kocharhook <pa...@svpal.org>
Ryan Nutling <rhu...@gloria.cord.edu>
Bryan Chaney <z940...@cc.mita.keio.ac.jp>
John C. O'Brien <j...@po.cwru.edu>
Shmoo <go...@utkvx.utcc.utk.edu>
kmwi...@iastate.edu
Ricky Foltz <ricky...@yob.com>
Jenn Scott <abrams53%snypolv...@ubvm.cc.buffalo,edu>
Ryan Hilman <rhi...@oasis.quay.com>
Kacey Craig <kcr...@scrapps.claremont.edu>
Luke Sather <lsa...@eagle.wbm.ca>
paclf...@aol.com
Jeff Williams <Willi...@msn.com>
Mike <arow...@ix.netcom.com>
Agen...@aol.com
Andrew J. "Neuracnu" Chinnici <neur...@inlink.com>
th...@iquest.net
Scoring system 2.0 by wood...@io.com (Jonathan Woodward) and
bd...@cco.caltech.edu (Brendan Dunn).
Significant reformatting of version 3.0 by The...@aol.com.
I reserve the right to edit all questions to correct spelling, grammar,
format, factual errors, obsolete information, or my personal whim. %=)
***weir...@mbnet.mb.ca***uvr...@freenet.mb.ca***
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[Animaniacs Code] A! JW22 YK++ir WK++ir DT++i P&B++/++^i HN/+++! MS+ ME+i P0>++ I++ Dpifo Tow2* $++{dva} {Vrjtmfsc} T200 E35 Ee74 H48a PonFeather XSire A24 M
[Simpsons Code] S1.2 HOM+ MRG BAR++ ABE+ BUR+ NED+ MOL++ APU++(@) I&S++ f++/+++ n+ Io $ 8F02,7F04 M24
***Normal is only a setting on your dryer***