What I Hate About Airwolf

Mr. Logical

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Apr 25, 1998, 3:00:00 AM4/25/98

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A few rules about the show which really tick me off.

1. Air-to-air missiles are notoriously inaccurate, except when fired by
Stringfellow Hawke, who very rarely misses.

Everyone else can't seem to hit the broad side of a barn. Doesn't matter
if Airwolf is taking evasive action, flying straight, at point-blank range,
or whatever.

2. A single missile hit is invariably fatal, except for Airwolf.

For anyone else, if you get hit once, you blow up, period. This even
applied to Redwolf, the second Airwolf. This episode is also an excellent
example of rule #1, by the way, where Redwolf fires four times at
point-blank range and misses every time.

I remember another episode where two Phantoms blast Airwolf twice with
air-to-air missiles and merely damage it. If it were any other aircraft it
would have been blown to hell. Unless, of course, they were "Leech"
missiles, which are allowed to hit Airwolf since they won't blow it up.

3. Airwolf is capable of carrying an almost unlimited number of missiles
in that dinky little three-tube thing under the fuselage.

I only remember Airwolf running out of missiles once, in the pilot. I lost
count after 12 shots.

Copperheads, Hellfires, Mavericks(this last one, incidentally, is an
air-to-ground missile), are all pretty big. Aircraft generally can only
carry about six or so under their wings, so where the hell is a puny little
copter like Airwolf keeping them all?

4. The slow missile syndome.

Most of the time, when a missile is fired, it flies toward its target like
a big bullet and is there (or misses) before you know it. But every now
and then, a missile spontaneously slows down, giving String time to fly
around playing tag with iit, use a sunburst, or have Dom do some fancy
computer thing and jam it.

Of, course, this never happens to Airwolf (it did happen to Redwolf),
except when you need the time to get clear of a nuclear explosion, which
incidentally managed to go relatively unnoticed by the rest of the world.

5. Archangel never thinks of following Dom or String out to where they
keep Airwolf whenever he gives them a mission.

Be nice, or I'll sic Mr. Sarcasm on you

Roger Godfrey

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Apr 26, 1998, 3:00:00 AM4/26/98

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If I remember correctly Air to Air missiles (Aim9 and AMRAAM) have proximity
fuses. On a twin engined jet (such as the Mig 29) there is a fair chance
that it would survive a 'hit'.

Sorry - just being pedantic. :)

Roger

Mr. Logical wrote in message <35417...@news.vphos.net>...

>
>A few rules about the show which really tick me off.
>
>

Aatif Nawaz

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Apr 28, 1998, 3:00:00 AM4/28/98

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I saw airwolf as a kid and haven't seen any of the episodes in quite a
while. The only missiles I remember airwolf having are mavericks,
chapparels, and some "air-to-air" missiles which I can't recall if they
were either sidewinders of amraams. What were the chapparels for and
which air-air ones did they use?

Roger Godfrey (ra...@globalnet.co.uk) wrote:
: If I remember correctly Air to Air missiles (Aim9 and AMRAAM) have proximity

: Roger

: >

--
______________________________________________________________________________
Aatif Nawaz | "The sooner you fall behind,
aatif...@uidaho.edu | the more time you'll have to catch up!"
http://www.uidaho.edu/~nawa9425 | -- fortune program
______________________________________________________________________________

Roger Godfrey

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Apr 28, 1998, 3:00:00 AM4/28/98

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To be honest I can't remember what missiles A-A missiles Air Wolf was
equiped with. However I do remember that in at least one episode an
aircraft was taken out with a Hellfire (an air to ground missile usually
used on the Apache in the real world). I don't think that all the writers
who worked on Air Wolf were conversent with real military weaponry.

Still, it never made the program unwatchable.

Roger

Aatif Nawaz wrote in message <6i39j9$88a$1...@newshound.csrv.uidaho.edu>...

Mr. Logical

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Apr 30, 1998, 3:00:00 AM4/30/98

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"Roger Godfrey" <ra...@globalnet.co.uk> wrote:

>To be honest I can't remember what missiles A-A missiles Air Wolf was
>equiped with. However I do remember that in at least one episode an
>aircraft was taken out with a Hellfire (an air to ground missile usually
>used on the Apache in the real world). I don't think that all the writers
>who worked on Air Wolf were conversent with real military weaponry.

>Still, it never made the program unwatchable.

>Roger

>Aatif Nawaz wrote in message <6i39j9$88a$1...@newshound.csrv.uidaho.edu>...
>>
>>
>>I saw airwolf as a kid and haven't seen any of the episodes in quite a
>>while. The only missiles I remember airwolf having are mavericks,
>>chapparels, and some "air-to-air" missiles which I can't recall if they
>>were either sidewinders of amraams. What were the chapparels for and
>>which air-air ones did they use?

Well the previous author was mistaken about Chapparels - that's a ground to
air missile. I recall in the pilot episode Airwolf fired a Bullpup, which
is an air-to-ground missile, and they showed a little three-button console
marked "weapon select" which had Copperheads (a-g), Mavericks (a-g), and
Hellfires, which I understand can in a pinch be used against airborne
targets.

I recall many times when Airwolf took out enemy aircraft with Mavericks or
Copperheads, even though in real life this would be impossible.