Uniform Rant
Chris the Ever Polite
worries - I'm in the public eye for 1 hour a day, my sysadmin doesn't wear
a uniform, and doesn't believe I have a need to, so let's try the bosses
reaction... Subtly suggest that I need a couple o new pairs of pants, or I
could just stop wearing uniform and save company money... Nope, we'll order
new pants, and new shirts, with the new logo on them! [1] OK, No problem,
I've worn uniform the past 4 1/2 years, and it's a tax deduction, and it
doesn't look too horrid, so I'll survive (albeit slightly less happy than
in civies). It arrived today, shirts look great. Pants are Iron free -
great... Wait a minute.. There's a logo embroided WHERE ?! On the
backside, just above the right pocket. Not subtly either - it's dark blue
pants, with a bright gold logo about 2x4 inches. <sigh> I'm _glad_ I
don't spend too long in the public eye with these things... Who's fscking
brilliant idea is this? It will be mentioned tomorrow when boss returns.
</rant>
[1] I Worked for "xxxx Computers", now for "xxxx Internet". Same parent
company, different services and logos. Up until now I've been wearing xxxx
computers shirts.
--
Chris
You wanna .sig? What for? Oh OK, If it makes you happy.....
Baloo Ursidae
> in civies). It arrived today, shirts look great. Pants are Iron free -
> great... Wait a minute.. There's a logo embroided WHERE ?! On the
> backside, just above the right pocket. Not subtly either - it's dark blue
Damn. I'm so glad such butt-ugly uniforms wouldn't fly in the private
security crowd. I wear a pretty decent long-sleeved black and white
uniform. Black iron-free polyesther pants with pockets I have to sew up
every few weeks as keywad[1] digs through the thin cotton fabric of the
pockets, black leather belt with silver buckle, white long-sleeve button
down iron-free shirt (with strategically placed seams that make it look
like it's professionally pressed) with black epaulets, company patch on
left shoulder, badge loops above left pocket.
[1] Lots of keys, too small a ring.
--
Baloo
Dan Birchall
> There's a logo embroided WHERE ?! On the backside, just above the
> right pocket. Not subtly either - it's dark blue pants, with a bright
> gold logo about 2x4 inches.
"Kick Me," right? Or "Your Lips Go Here" perhaps?
--
Please read my address very carefully before sending me any spam.
Queen Of Swords@werk
n...@ratherbeflying.chris (Chris the Ever Polite) banged out :
>There's a logo embroided WHERE ?! On the
>backside, just above the right pocket. Not subtly either - it's dark blue
>pants, with a bright gold logo about 2x4 inches.
Mickey Dee's has a similar arrangement. I think it's a kind of
shorthand for 'your arse belongs to us'.
I wish black army BDU's could be considered business casual. ;p
--
Queen Of Swords, Cubicle Mopeila - "Will swap tapes for food!"
GCS d-@ s++: a-- C++++(----) UL++++>$ P+ L++ E-- W+++$ N+++ K- w M
PS+ PE t+ 5++ X- R+ tv b++ DI++++ D++ G e++ h--- r++ x?
Chris the Ever Polite
queen_o...@removethespamfilter.telstra.com
was heard to mumble:
>Mickey Dee's has a similar arrangement. I think it's a kind of
>shorthand for 'your arse belongs to us'.
That was our theory as well :) Turns out the company we ordered from
screwed up - PHB clearly said NOT to do it when asked apparently... Oh well
<shrugs> Chances are I'm stuck with it now. I'll live - I'll just wear my
shirt untucked more often.
--
- Chris -
"I Have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleave. I Have a history of
loosing my shirt" - Bare Naked Ladies, 'One Week'.
Matt Olson
> I wish black army BDU's could be considered business casual. ;p
They are at my orkplace. <smirk> Mostly, the talks-to-clients
types who occasionally insist on "professional" dress can't or
don't distinguish between BDUs and "cargo pants", which they
class under "khakis" and thus within the realm of business
casual. Nicely polished garrison boots also look much more
"business casual" than runners, which is fun. They still make
me wear a shirt with a collar over the ObBlackTeeShirt, sadly.
Cheers,
Matt
--
Matt "something or other" Olson, speaking for himself.
"Marlowe's my _bitch_!"
-- William Shakespeare, as played by the Hand of God, in Tatsuya Ishida's
_Sinfest_ (http://www.sinfest.net/d/20020119.html)
Baloo Ursidae
> Mickey Dee's has a similar arrangement. I think it's a kind of
> shorthand for 'your arse belongs to us'.
All your ass are belong to us!
--
Baloo
Bill Hay
>great... Wait a minute.. There's a logo embroided WHERE ?! On the
>backside, just above the right pocket. Not subtly either - it's dark blue
--
TANSTAAFM
Queen Of Swords@werk
ol...@csu401.cs.ualberta.ca (Matt Olson) banged out :
>Mostly, the talks-to-clients
>types who occasionally insist on "professional" dress can't or
>don't distinguish between BDUs and "cargo pants", which they
>class under "khakis" and thus within the realm of business
>casual.
I've never seen the standard-issue 'Gap' khakis IRL but I know what
kind of pants I want to be wearing if I have to climb under desks all
day, and it isn't something light-colored and stain-attracting ;p [1].
And as for professional dress being a skirt, I'm not going there. :)
Hope it doesn't become a problem in the future.
Do BDU's have pockets big enough for a Palm and common attachments?
Not the keyboard, of course.
[1] Light-colored pants wouldn't even survive my Monday coffee.
Paul Raj Khangure
> kind of pants I want to be wearing if I have to climb under desks all
> day, and it isn't something light-colored and stain-attracting ;p [1].
> And as for professional dress being a skirt, I'm not going there. :)
I enjoy watching certain people mucking about under desks, especially if
they're wearing a short skirt.
Of course, tight pants can be almost as enjoyable.
> [1] Light-colored pants wouldn't even survive my Monday coffee.
You should try drinking the coffee, and not spilling it in your lap.
Or get an AOL CD to use as a coaster.
Paul Raj Khangure
--
I stayed up all last night playing poker with tarot cards.
I got a full house and four people died. - Stephen Wright
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
Queen Of Swords@werk
<p...@digitaljunkie.net> banged out :
>I enjoy watching certain people mucking about under desks, especially if
>they're wearing a short skirt.
I do not want to encourage this kind of behaviour. ;>
>You should try drinking the coffee, and not spilling it in your lap.
Mondays :
sleep(insufficent)
cat coffee | /dev/mouth
buffer overflow, core dumped
Dean Sabella
Queen Of Swords@werk wrote:
> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
Ahh, there's your problem - you shouldn't drink coffee through a pipe.
They're for tobacco.
Try a mug instead, you might find such an implement gives you more
success.
HTH, etc.
Dean (g,d&r)
Matt Olson
<re: virtues of BDU pants at uptight orkplaces>
> I've never seen the standard-issue 'Gap' khakis IRL but I know what
> kind of pants I want to be wearing if I have to climb under desks all
> day, and it isn't something light-colored and stain-attracting ;p [1].
If your day involves a lot of climbing under desks, you'll be
happy to know that BDU pants have reinforced knees.
Um. That didn't come out quite the way I wanted it to. But
it's amusing, so I'll leave it in.
> Do BDU's have pockets big enough for a Palm and common attachments?
> Not the keyboard, of course.
Mine fit trade paperbacks easily, with room for a cellphone,
a small notebook, and a few pens as well. If you get one of
those folding keyboards, you could probably store all of your
Palm gear in one of the cargo pockets, with plenty of room
for recovery (books, Discman+CDs, etc) in the other.
Pockets are truly one of life's unsung satisfactions.
[1] NMF
Cheers,
Matt
--
Matt "pedant" Olson, speaking for himself.
The answer that does not raise another question is not the right answer.
Baloo Ursidae
> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
This can't work. Pipes require commands. You can't execute a device. I
think what you're trying to get at is
cat coffee > /dev/mouth
That is, concatenate coffee pouring the output into /dev/mouth.
Though if it's bad coffee (like the Valvoline[1] they serve in the vending
machines at Stream), it's probably good to follow it like this:
cat coffee < /dev/mouth
That is, take what's at /dev/mouth and dump it back into the coffee.
[1] I recommend you change your coffee every 3000 miles.
--
Baloo
Mike Raeder
> OK, So my uniform pants are wearing a little thin, and I need new ones.
#include <had_to_be_done.h>
Boxers or y-fronts? :)
--
Mikey Raeder
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine
Posted by news://news.nb.nu
Queen Of Swords@werk
ol...@csu401.cs.ualberta.ca (Matt Olson) banged out :
>If your day involves a lot of climbing under desks, you'll be
>happy to know that BDU pants have reinforced knees.
At the moment, that's just for cabling. Employment situation hasn't
gotten bad enough yet for any other possibilities. ;p
Matt Olson
> ol...@csu401.cs.ualberta.ca (Matt Olson) banged out :
>
>
>>If your day involves a lot of climbing under desks, you'll be
>>happy to know that BDU pants have reinforced knees.
>
> At the moment, that's just for cabling. Employment situation hasn't
> gotten bad enough yet for any other possibilities. ;p
Hmm. Network prison.
"Hey, newbie, bend over and plug in my patch cable."
ObOrk: Bad day. Maybe once the shaking subsides, I'll rant
about it (probably in the Other Place, which seems more
amenable to pbx+programming rants). Or maybe I'll just
curl up into a little ball and try to get some sleep.
Phone hardware and phone software, when combined, suck ex-
ponentially, not additively. And when you throw in their
documentation, you get a curve rather reminiscent of the
tower function.
ARGH.
Cheers,
Matt
--
Matt "four letter word" Olson, speaking for himself.
"You chose to be an anal-retentive fuckstain, and I chose to be an insensitive
hedonistic shithead. But I'm sure I'm having a better time."
-- Vinnie Jordan, 1955-2001
SHELLEY MERLE UPTON
Baloo Ursidae <ba...@ursine.dyndns.org> wrote:
>Queen Of Swords@werk <queen_o...@removethespamfilter.telstra.com> wrote:
>
>> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
>
>This can't work. Pipes require commands. You can't execute a device. I
>think what you're trying to get at is
>
>cat coffee > /dev/mouth
>
>That is, concatenate coffee pouring the output into /dev/mouth.
>
>Though if it's bad coffee (like the Valvoline[1] they serve in the vending
>machines at Stream), it's probably good to follow it like this:
>
>cat coffee < /dev/mouth
C|N|K
:)
<UI>
(Where C=coffee, N=nose and K=keyboard)
<\UI>
smu
speaking only for herself and in no way for UWA.
qadn
> >> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
> >
> >This can't work. Pipes require commands. You can't execute a device. I
> >think what you're trying to get at is
> >
> >cat coffee > /dev/mouth
> >
> >That is, concatenate coffee pouring the output into /dev/mouth.
> >
> >Though if it's bad coffee (like the Valvoline[1] they serve in the vending
> >machines at Stream), it's probably good to follow it like this:
> >
> >cat coffee < /dev/mouth
>
> C|N|K
> :)
>
>
qadn
Kenneth Brody
>
> queen_o...@removethespamfilter.telstra.com
> was heard to mumble:
>
> >Mickey Dee's has a similar arrangement. I think it's a kind of
> >shorthand for 'your arse belongs to us'.
>
> That was our theory as well :) Turns out the company we ordered from
> screwed up - PHB clearly said NOT to do it when asked apparently... Oh well
> <shrugs> Chances are I'm stuck with it now. I'll live - I'll just wear my
> shirt untucked more often.
If PHB ordered them without the butt-logo, grab a seam-ripper and
un-embroider them.
--
+---------+----------------------------------+-----------------------------+
| Kenneth | kenb...@bestweb.net | "The opinions expressed |
| J. | | herein are not necessarily |
| Brody | http://www.bestweb.net/~kenbrody | those of fP Technologies." |
+---------+----------------------------------+-----------------------------+
GCS (ver 3.12) d- s+++: a C++$(+++) ULAVHSC^++++$ P+>+++ L+(++) E-(---)
W++ N+ o+ K(---) w@ M@ V- PS++(+) PE@ Y+ PGP-(+) t+ R@ tv+() b+
DI+(++++) D---() G e* h---- r+++ y?
Kenneth Brody
>
> In article <3c71d983...@news.picknowl.com.au>,
> Queen Of Swords@werk wrote:
> > cat coffee | /dev/mouth
>
> Ahh, there's your problem - you shouldn't drink coffee through a pipe.
> They're for tobacco.
And you should keep the cat away from it, too.
> Try a mug instead, you might find such an implement gives you more
> success.
coffee </dev/mug >/dev/mouth
Kenneth Brody
[...]
>
> C|N|K
[...]
ITYM:
C|N>K
Kenneth Brody
>
> Queen Of Swords@werk (queen_o...@removethespamfilter.telstra.com) wrote:
>
> <re: virtues of BDU pants at uptight orkplaces>
> > I've never seen the standard-issue 'Gap' khakis IRL but I know what
> > kind of pants I want to be wearing if I have to climb under desks all
> > day, and it isn't something light-colored and stain-attracting ;p [1].
>
> If your day involves a lot of climbing under desks, you'll be
> happy to know that BDU pants have reinforced knees.
Do they come with the Mokica Lewinsky monogram on the pocket?
> Um. That didn't come out quite the way I wanted it to. But
> it's amusing, so I'll leave it in.
[...]
Baloo Ursidae
> If PHB ordered them without the butt-logo, grab a seam-ripper and
> un-embroider them.
Have you ever removed embroidery from something that originally had it?
It leaves this nice cheesecloth thin spot in the fabric afterwards. You'd
rip the pants a new asshole.
--
Baloo
Baloo Ursidae
> C|N|K
> (Where C=coffee, N=nose and K=keyboard)
> <\UI>
Wrong. I don't think you're expecting the keyboard to do anything but
collect the results, so more correctly it would be
coffee | nose > keyboard
I especially appreciate the idea of piping coffee through the nose.
--
Baloo
SHELLEY MERLE UPTON
>> Queen Of Swords@werk wrote:
>>> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
>>
>> Ahh, there's your problem - you shouldn't drink coffee through a pipe.
>> They're for tobacco.
>
>
>cat coffee > /dev/mouth
>
Puss snoring beside me reminds me of a long forgotten amusement...
central:~ $ cat tinned_fish
cat: cannot open tinned_fish
:)
Dan Holdsworth
<s...@aber.ac.uk>
>>> In article <3c71d983...@news.picknowl.com.au>,
>>> Queen Of Swords@werk wrote:
>>>> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
>>>
>>> Ahh, there's your problem - you shouldn't drink coffee through a pipe.
>>> They're for tobacco.
>>
>>Or better yet, a funnel:
>>
>>cat coffee > /dev/mouth
>>
>
>Puss snoring beside me reminds me of a long forgotten amusement...
>
>central:~ $ cat tinned_fish
>cat: cannot open tinned_fish
Ahhh, that reminds me of an age-old amusement, that I do sincerely swear will
be tried on the feckless plonker who currently is pleased to call it's self
my line manager:
On $Bill_OS: Take a screen dump.
Set screen dump as background image.
Hide all icons, toolbars and anything useful.
Disable the mouse.
Leave the victim to work it all out...
--
Dan Holdsworth PhD da...@supanet.com
By caffeine alone I set my mind in motion, By the beans of Java
do thoughts acquire speed, hands acquire shaking, the shaking
becomes a warning, By caffeine alone do I set my mind in motion
DaZZa
>In article <3c71d983...@news.picknowl.com.au>,
>Queen Of Swords@werk wrote:
>> cat coffee | /dev/mouth
>
>Ahh, there's your problem - you shouldn't drink coffee through a pipe.
>They're for tobacco.
Sez you.
I find two inch PVC, cleaned first with acetone and with the inner[1] end
slightly bevelled for easy insertion just _perfect_ for caffine intake[2] on
a Monday morning.
DaZZa
[1] Read: End inserted into mouth
[2] I said Caffine, not coffee. My caffine comes cold and with bubbles.
--
Address in header is spamblocked. ROT13 the following for email replies
qn...@mvc.pbz.nh
Bogdan Iamandei [ROT13]
> On 24 Feb 2002 16:31:33 -0000, SHELLEY MERLE UPTON
> <s...@aber.ac.uk>
> was popularly supposed to have said:
>
> On $Bill_OS: Take a screen dump.
> Set screen dump as background image.
> Hide all icons, toolbars and anything useful.
> Disable the mouse.
> Leave the victim to work it all out...
Same configuration. Change all the desktop icons to the same image.
Change all the icon names to the same name. Change the most important
associations with the same thing. Watch them squirm. Leave into the
sunset.
For dubious values of fun - might want to open .doc files with regedit.
Ino!~
--
I have seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire
off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark
near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time,
like tears in rain. Time to die.
Kenneth Brody
[...]
> Ahhh, that reminds me of an age-old amusement, that I do sincerely swear will
> be tried on the feckless plonker who currently is pleased to call it's self
> my line manager:
>
> On $Bill_OS: Take a screen dump.
s/^.*$/On Mac OS, take a screen dump and copy it to .BMP on \$Bill_OS./
> Set screen dump as background image.
>
> Hide all icons, toolbars and anything useful.
>
> Disable the mouse.
>
> Leave the victim to work it all out...
--
+---------+----------------------------------+-----------------------------+
| Kenneth | kenbrody at bestweb.net | "The opinions expressed |
Kenneth Brody
[...]
> Same configuration. Change all the desktop icons to the same image.
> Change all the icon names to the same name. Change the most important
> associations with the same thing. Watch them squirm. Leave into the
> sunset.
>
> For dubious values of fun - might want to open .doc files with regedit.
True story[1]:
Client has a system where clicking just about any of the icons on the
desktop caused WordPerfect to start. Even items off of the start/programs
menu run WordPerfect instead.
Eventually narrowed it down to starting anything on the D: drive would
cause WordPerfect to start instead.
Then I had one of those "aha!" moments.
(Dangerous information follows. Keep all lusers out while reading.
You never know what seed it might plant in their head.)
Lbh xabj ubj "uggc:...", "sgc:...", naq fb ba jvyy fgneg n cebtenz gb
unaqyr gur cebgbpby? Jryy, vg gheaf bhg gung fbzrubj, fbzrjurer, gur
ertvfgel unq na ragel nqqrq gung gbyq vg gung "q:" jnf whfg nabgure
cebgbpby, naq JbeqCresrpg jnf gur cebtenz gb unaqyr vg.
Fortunately[2], Windows itself was on C:. I can just imagine the
havoc[3] that would have been wrought had Windows itself been on the
D: drive.
How to implement this on a victim's system is left as a exercise for
the reader.
[1] I saw it first-hand. No FOAF stuff here.
[2] FSVO.
[3] Well, beyond the havoc already wrought by Windows itself, that is.
Kevin Goebel
>>> be tried on the feckless plonker who currently is pleased to call it's self
>>> my line manager:
>>> On $Bill_OS: Take a screen dump.
>>s/^.*$/On Mac OS, take a screen dump and copy it to .BMP on \$Bill_OS./
>Or, "It is now safe to turn off your computer"
>Or, bogus BSOD
>Or, Solitaire
>etc...
>>> Set screen dump as background image.
>>> Hide all icons, toolbars and anything useful.
>>> Disable the mouse.
>>> Leave the victim to work it all out...
The company of artists is inspiring.
I have a 16 byte COM file that reboots a PC. That would make a fine addition
to a autoexec.bat file. I haven't looked at later MS boxes (2000, XP) to see
how they handle start-up stuff. I wonder if a start-up task would do as
well...
Kevin
Bron Gondwana
That would be:
coffee | nose >> keyboard
(unless it's particularly corrosive coffee...)
Peter Corlett
[...]
> (unless it's particularly corrosive coffee...)
Yes.
My landlord sent a cheerful workman over without notice, who then proceeded
to half destroy my home in an attempt to replace the boiler. Workmen like
cuppas, so I just kept making pots of coffee to my usual recipe, and he kept
drinking it. The following day, the workman wasn't so cheerful. The coffee
had kept him awake all night.
I also had somebody moan about the high they got off half a mug of my
coffee. I drank about six times as much, and never noticed a thing.
c | n | k | desk > floor
DaZZa
>I have a 16 byte COM file that reboots a PC. That would make a fine addition
>to a autoexec.bat file. I haven't looked at later MS boxes (2000, XP) to see
>how they handle start-up stuff. I wonder if a start-up task would do as
>well...
16 bytes? How big do you have to go? :-)
We had one that was 8 bytes - don't know if I've still got a copy of it,
though.
There's also one which was something like _5_ bytes. Don't know if I've still
got a copy of that, either.
The 5 byte one wasn't a true "program", though. It was a fancy combination
of keystrokes converted into an executable in some way I don't recall in my
old age.
DaZZa
Kevin Goebel
>>I have a 16 byte COM file that reboots a PC.
>16 bytes? How big do you have to go? :-)
>We had one that was 8 bytes - don't know if I've still got a copy of it,
>though.
"Mine's bigger than yours,"
Humphrey Bogart to Sydney Greenstreet, 'Across the Pacific, MGM 1942
Kevin
Dean Sabella
> We had one that was 8 bytes - don't know if I've still got a copy of it,
> though.
>
> There's also one which was something like _5_ bytes. Don't know if I've still
> got a copy of that, either.
5 bytes is easy to do. You can get the size down to 2 bytes, with
certain caveats.[1]
Unfortunately, $TOY_OS and friends do trap these BIOS calls, so neither
the 2- nor 5-byte version works in their GUI. Both work fine in
$TOY_OS's version of DOS, though.
But really, if you're in full-blown $TOY_OS there are far more
interesting ways of messing with the machine.
Dean
[1] UI available to the truly sick on private request; I'm not going to
pollute This Place with such severe unrecovery.
Jay Mottern
news:bk515a...@ursine.dyndns.org:
I think he was talking about the people that screwed up the order, not the
pants. No?
-Jay
--
Tech Support: The guys who follow the
'Parade of New Products' with a shovel.
DaZZa
>da...@deadspam.com (DaZZa) wrote:
>>The 5 byte one wasn't a true "program", though. It was a fancy combination
>>of keystrokes converted into an executable in some way I don't recall in my
>>old age.
>
Now *that* is sick.
Besides, that's 6 bytes. :-)
Bloody NUgent! :-)