Elephant Jokes
John Burns
Q. Why are elephants big gray and wrinkly?
A. Becuase is they were small white and smooth they would be an aspirin!
The Joker
How many steps does it take to put a giraffe in a fridge - 3, you open the
door, you put the giraffe in and you close the door
How many steps does it take to put an elephant in a fridge - 4, you open the
door, you take out the giraffe, you put the elephant in and you close the
door
How do you kill a blue elephant - you shoot it with a blue elephant gun
How do you kill a pink elephant - you hold its nose until it turns blue and
you shoot it with a blue elephant gun
Why do elephants paint themselves green with red polka dots - so they can
hide themselves in the strawberry patch
Have you ever seen an elephant that's green with red polka dots - shows you
how good their camouflage is
How do you sit four elephants in a car - two in front and two behind
How do you sit four elephants and seven astronauts in a car - two in front
and two behind with the seven astronauts in the ashtray - they're from the
Space Shuttle that blew up
What's grey and zooms around at a 100 m.p.h. - an elephant on a motobike
How do you know when an elephant has raided your fridge - when you see the
motobike parked next to it
What did Tarzan say when he saw an elephant charging towards him -
"AAAHHHGGG elephant coming!"
What did the charging elephant say when it saw Tarzan swinging towards
m -
Elephants can't talk!!
Sabre Man
What's the biggest drawback in the jungle?
The elephant's foreskin.
What do you do when you come across an elephant in the jungle?
Apologise and wipe it off.
Why do elephants paint their bollocks red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.
What's the loudest noise in the jungle?
A monkey eating cherries.
Why don't elephants have trunks?
They do!
gb
please, no more of this dribble......by the way, when is your fourth
birthday?
The Joker
gb wrote in message <01bce9a3$dba9a340$2797...@pgbingha.connectnet.com>...
>please, no more of this dribble......by the way, when is your fourth
>birthday?
>
Right after your FIRST!!
Anyway, on the subject of little children...
There was this boy who was born blind and had lived for nine years of his
life in total darkness. One day his mom came to him and said, "Johnny, I
had a dream last night in which Buddha came to you and healed your eyes.
Buddha also told me that in order for you to receive this healing, you would
need to pray real hard for the rest of tonight and once more tomorrow
morning."
Johnny was really exited and began praying and praying until he fell asleep.
Next morning, his mom woke him up and reminded him to pray one more time,
"Just close your eyes, pray and when you open them, you'll be able to see."
Johnny closed his eyes, prayed harder than before and opened his eyes ...
"MOM!" he shouted, "I can't see!"... His mom said, "I know dear, April
Fool!"
Flux Wildly
The Joker wrote:
>
> How many steps does it take to put a giraffe in a fridge - 3, you open the
> door, you put the giraffe in and you close the door
>
> How many steps does it take to put an elephant in a fridge - 4, you open the
> door, you take out the giraffe, you put the elephant in and you close the
> door
>
If there's a fire on the African plains, which animal will be safe?
The giraffe - it's in the fridge!
us...@msn.com
What does ice cream and an elephant have in common???
They both cum in gallons!!!
High Commander Cylar
> What does ice cream and an elephant have in common???
>
> They both cum in gallons!!!
Where are an elephant's sex organs?
In his feet - if he steps on you, you're fucked!
Why does an elephant have four feet?
Eight inches isn't enough.
Chicken joke:
Why don't chickens wear underwear?
Their peckers are on their faces.
Matt
------------------------------------------------------------------------
cy...@ecst.csuchico.edu http://www.ecst.csuchico.edu/~cylar
President - Chico State Chapter, Association of Computing Machinery
http://www.ecst.csuchico.edu/acmchico
Mark Bartman
us...@msn.com wrote:
>
> What does ice cream and an elephant have in common???
>
> They both cum in gallons!!!
So they can hide in apple trees..
Whats the loudest sound in the jungle?
giraffes eating apples!