Not everything he's cracked up to be...

[G. P.]

My furniture goes back to Louis the 14th (It will, if Louis
doesn't get paid before the 14th).

I have a big following (Five finance companies, 3 department
stores, 2 landlords and one collection agency).

My ancestores go back as far as Columbus. (Some of them even
went back as far as Chicago.)

I dabble in oils. (He's a gas station attendant.)

My brother occupied a chair of applied electricity in a
famous institution. (He went to the electric chair in the
state pen.)