req. "My town was so small"
John Crowther
Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
the car dealer's showroom only had one car
Where ever you stood you were always on the "out skirts" of town
Thanks :)
philski
In article <5ce5ls$q...@sjx-ixn6.ix.netcom.com> del...@ix.netcom.com(John Crowther) writes:
>From: del...@ix.netcom.com(John Crowther)
>Subject: req. "My town was so small"
>Date: 25 Jan 1997 23:40:44 GMT
>Thanks :)
... The town square was a triangle!
Philski.
Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.
http://www.spirit.net.au/~philski/
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Jeffery Chow
: ... The town square was a triangle!
The <insert town name here> Airport, Game Farm, and Medical building
uses electricity generated by a hamster wheel.
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It was a one whore town.
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Charles Clendenen
philski wrote:
>
> In article <5ce5ls$q...@sjx-ixn6.ix.netcom.com> del...@ix.netcom.com(John Crowther) writes:
> >From: del...@ix.netcom.com(John Crowther)
> >Subject: req. "My town was so small"
> >Date: 25 Jan 1997 23:40:44 GMT
>
> >Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
>
> >the car dealer's showroom only had one car
>
> >Where ever you stood you were always on the "out skirts" of town
>
> >Thanks :)
>
...the "Entering" and "Leaving" signs were on the same post.
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Remove nospam_ from address to reply.
By the way, I never, ever visit sites advertised
in Unsolicited Commercial Email or cross-posted,
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Paul Dietrich
On 25 Jan 1997, John Crowther wrote:
> Date: 25 Jan 1997 23:40:44 GMT
> From: John Crowther <del...@ix.netcom.com>
> Newsgroups: rec.humor, alt.tasteless.jokes
> Subject: req. "My town was so small"
>
> Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
>
> the car dealer's showroom only had one car
>
> Where ever you stood you were always on the "out skirts" of town
>
> Thanks :)
>
>
The "entering" and "leaving" signs were on the same post.
or the sign reads:
Brothers, ORE
Population 2
(and sometimes 3)
ps, this sign really exists
Anne Hilllebrand
Paul Dietrich wrote:
>
> On 25 Jan 1997, John Crowther wrote:
>
> > Date: 25 Jan 1997 23:40:44 GMT
> > From: John Crowther <del...@ix.netcom.com>
> > Newsgroups: rec.humor, alt.tasteless.jokes
> > Subject: req. "My town was so small"
> >
> > Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
> >
Our school was so small, and the students so dumb, that one guy was
outstanding Senior 3 years running.
Our town was so far out in the stick that the last 2 miles to it
were by grape vine.
and the town idiot and the mayor were the same guy.
We had to put a feedbag on the homecoming queen so she wouldn't
graze at halftime.
Elizabeth H.
In article <32EC1E...@texas.net> Charles Clendenen <nospam_...@texas.net> writes:
>philski wrote:
>>
>> In article <5ce5ls$q...@sjx-ixn6.ix.netcom.com> del...@ix.netcom.com(John
>Crowther) writes:
>> >From: del...@ix.netcom.com(John Crowther)
>>
>>
>>
>> >Where ever you stood you were always on the "out skirts" of town
>>
>> >Thanks :)
>>
>> Philski.
>...the "Entering" and "Leaving" signs were on the same post.
If you blinked while driving through, you missed it.
BH
Carl "MOOSE" Moslener
My town was so small nobody used turn signals - we knew where they were
going.
holl...@hotmail.com
In article <5cgftl$n...@panix2.panix.com>,
Har!
Our town was so small:
Our local daily paper came only once a week...
-------------------==== Posted via Deja News ====-----------------------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Post to Usenet
Avital Pilpel
holl...@hotmail.com wrote:
>
> In article <5cgftl$n...@panix2.panix.com>,
> pr...@panix.com (Walter Bushell) wrote:
> >
> >
> > It was a one whore town.
> >
another version:
It was so small the local whore was a virgin.
--
Avital Pilpel.
=====================================
The majority is never right.
-Lazarus Long
=====================================
Hayden
Anne Hilllebrand wrote:
> and the town idiot and the mayor were the same guy.
And this is unusual, even for a big city?
Hayden
add rabbit to Subject: line to override spamgard{tm}
Hayden <hfle...@postoffice.newnham.utas.edu.au> wrote:
Say, aren't you running for Mayor of Los Angeles?
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mjg
My hometown was so small, the "Welcome" and "Come Back" were on opposite
sides of the SAME sign!
Andrew Scott
John Crowther (del...@ix.netcom.com) wrote:
: Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
: the car dealer's showroom only had one car
: Where ever you stood you were always on the "out skirts" of town
: Thanks :)
It was so small, it didnt even show up on a map of the town!
(taken from a Discworld novel)
--
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Chad Long
> We had to put a feedbag on the homecoming queen so she wouldn't
> graze at halftime.
The local hooker was a virgin...
Eminence Grise
In article <32ED6B...@worldnet.att.net>,
annehil...@worldnet.att.net says...
> Paul Dietrich wrote:
> >
> > On 25 Jan 1997, John Crowther wrote:
> >
> > >
> > > Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
> > >
>
> Our school was so small, and the students so dumb, that one guy was
> outstanding Senior 3 years running.
>
> Our town was so far out in the stick that the last 2 miles to it
> were by grape vine.
>
>
> graze at halftime.
>
This one is a fact : our island country (Singapore) is so small (one
fifth the size of Rhode Island) when one of our planes take off we are
immediately in other countries' airspace (Malaysia, Indonesia, etc)
--
Now using Gravity -
"the best newsgroup reader around.
Neither Forte Agent nor the readers
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can match Gravity."
- PC Computing January 1997
Bru
add "rabbit" to Subject: line to override spamgard{tm} <w...@netcom.com>
wrote in article <1997012905225...@netcom.com>...
> Hayden <hfle...@postoffice.newnham.utas.edu.au> wrote:
> :Anne Hilllebrand wrote:
> :
> :> and the town idiot and the mayor were the same guy.
> :
> :And this is unusual, even for a big city?
> :
> :Hayden
>
> Say, aren't you running for Mayor of Los Angeles?
Why, is there something wrong with the mayor that he can't run?
add rabbit to Subject: line to override spamgard{tm}
+++Warning: check newsgroups+++
"Bru" <bruno....@olivetti.com.au> wrote:
:add "rabbit" to Subject: line to override spamgard{tm} <w...@netcom.com>:> Say, aren't you running for Mayor of Los Angeles?
:
:Why, is there something wrong with the mayor that he can't run?
Not fast enough, apparently.
space for rent
My town was so small we had to take turns being the village idiot.
Stuart A. Bronstein
In our town the roadsigns "You Are Now Entering" and "You Are Now
Leaving" were on the same sign.
Stu
David Harmon
How about:
My town is so small, the stop light gets rolled up with the sidewalks.
My town is so small, they had to take down the stop sign so they could have
room for the speed limit sign.
My town is so small, they had to pay a fee before we could be listed on a
map.
My town is so small, the town council had to ask the surrounding towns for
permission to post the "you are leaving . . ." and the "you are entering .
." signs in their jurisdictions.
My town is so small, the telephone numbers were only 1 digit long, and even
then, they stopped at "6".
My town is so small, the phone company prints the phone directory on the
backs of matchbooks.
My town is so small, they had to lease a ZIP code.
My town is so small, we can't even afford a post office - a mailman from a
nearby town stands outside in our town square between noon and 12:15 and
hands out the mail as people walk by.
My town is so small, the water department consists of one hand-pumped well
and 10 buckets; two of those buckets are spares just in case a fire
breaks out.
My town is so small, the town parade has to be held in another town.
My town is so small, the Ethiopian government is sending us development
aid.
My town is so small, the town meetings are held in my brother's Winnebago.
My town is so small, the 7-11 is only open from 9 to 5.
My town is so small, there are no minorities. We have two people of each
race.
My town is so small, the town doubled in size when Wal_Mart built a store.
My town is so small, we don't have room for drive-in windows.
My town is so small, the town drunk is also the deputy sheriff.
My town is so small, the town council bought a fax machine and brought the
phone system to it's knees.
My town is so small, the town's only newspaper folded when the subscriber
died.
My town is so small, the grapevine is just a twig.
J. Larry B.
Eminence Grise wrote:
>
> In article <32ED6B...@worldnet.att.net>,
> annehil...@worldnet.att.net says...
> > Paul Dietrich wrote:
> > >
> > > On 25 Jan 1997, John Crowther wrote:
> > >
> > > > Date: 25 Jan 1997 23:40:44 GMT
> > > > From: John Crowther <del...@ix.netcom.com>
> > > > Newsgroups: rec.humor, alt.tasteless.jokes
> > > > Subject: req. "My town was so small"
> > > >
> > > > Could someone please help me with jokes in this area? IE
> > > >
> > > > Our town was so small that our Chamber of Commerce had it's office in the next town over.
> >
> > Our school was so small, and the students so dumb, that one guy was
> > outstanding Senior 3 years running.
> >
> > Our town was so far out in the stick that the last 2 miles to it
> > were by grape vine.
> >
> >
> > graze at halftime.
> >
>
> This one is a fact : our island country (Singapore) is so small (one
> fifth the size of Rhode Island) when one of our planes take off we are
> immediately in other countries' airspace (Malaysia, Indonesia, etc)
>
> --
> Now using Gravity -
> "the best newsgroup reader around.
> Neither Forte Agent nor the readers
> in Netscape Navigator and
> Microsoft Internet Explorer
> can match Gravity."
>
> - PC Computing January 1997
Can't help you. Used to live so far out in the country that any way you
went was toward town.
--
John Crowther
In <Pine.PMDF.3.91.9701300...@MHFP.SWMED.EDU> space
for rent <fp...@MHFP.SWMED.EDU> writes:
>
>
>My town was so small we had to take turns being the village idiot.
>
>On Tue, 28 Jan 1997, Carl "MOOSE" Moslener wrote:
>
>> My town was so small nobody used turn signals - we knew where they
were
>> going.
>>
>>
Brian Near
>My town was so small we had to take turns being the village idiot.
We had to cancel our Santa Claus parade this year.
The horse died...
McOuille
In article <philski.19...@spirit.com.au>, philski
<phi...@spirit.com.au> writes
>... The town square was a triangle!
>
>
>
>Philski.
--
McOuille
Ian Wiles
In article <01bc0fa0$c159c0c0$02cb...@dharmon.custard>, David Harmon
<dha...@custard.com> writes
>
>My town is so small, the town meetings are held in my brother's Winnebago.
>
>
--
Ian Wiles
Bryan Morris
Rhode Island is the only state in the nation that is shown actual size
on the map!
Dave McNeil
Not really a "My town was so small", but it fits the subject matter:
Near where I live there is a "four-corners" place called Apto. There
is only one business there, and it has gas pumps, and a convenience
store, and at various points in time housed a body shop or service
station. At one time the guy sold used cars. His business card read
was "Apto Used Cars. Apto's largest automotive retailer."
The sign over the store? The "Apto Mall".
Hey, at least he *thought* big.
Michael Pompey
My town is so small that the Entering and Leaving city limits
signs are on the same stick.
Bryan Morris <mor...@pegasus.cc.ucf.edu> wrote in article
<32F5ED...@pegasus.cc.ucf.edu>...
The Doctor
My town is so small that the Coke Machine at the gas station is the
only street light.
space for rent
A vistor asked where's the nightlife. We answered "she moved to
the county seat.
dal...@freenet.edmonton.ab.ca
Dave McNeil (dgmc...@on.bell.ca) wrote:
: Not really a "My town was so small", but it fits the subject matter:
--
: My hometown was so small, the town hooker was a virgin.
: My town was so small the bus line only had one stop.
: (With thanks to Rodney Dangerfield and whoever he stole them from.)
email: dal...@freenet.edmonton.ab.ca
Don Alkerton
Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Carlhallen
... the local hooker was a virgin.
Carlhallen
Gaven Miller
My town was so small that the sign with the towns name was larger than
the town itself.
--
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