LOOKING FOR GOOD NIGGER JOKES
JACMLC
Laurence Hensel
<JAC...@prodigy.net> writes
>DOES ANY ONE HAVE ANY GOOD NIGGER JOKES
>
>
even better, take his computer apart and shove the component parts down
his throat?
--
Yours, "There was this rabbit, and it
Loz walked into a butchers..."
mailto:l...@hensel.demon.co.uk
http://www.hensel.demon.co.uk - The Hub Of Cheese
ExyIe
Look fuckhead how you even know how to turn on your "picture box" is beyond me.
Go outside and rape your pet cow some more you sick freak. The internet is
NON-DISCRIMINATORY.
Blob
and now YOU are discriminating against racists, you hypocritical fuckwad
OverMuch
Could you please explain this a little more for us cow rapists? I really
don't understand what you mean when you say the interenet is
non-discriminatory when 98% of all users are white Americans and hate sites
abound. Really, I'm struggling to understand where you're coming from here.
OverMuch
John
You are too funny.When I was in the Marine Corp my D.I told us only
faggots and sailors were named Laurence.I'm gonna go out on a limb here
and guess that you are not at sea.Now,shut the fuck up and let the man
get some nigger jokes.Who the fuck made you King of this NG?Some faggot
election in the UK?And before you go off on America,just fucking
remember that an American white male invented the internet.You people in
your second class countries wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for
Americans.So shut your jellied eel hole and leave the man alone.
Blob
Hey, John, what do you call a Marine with an IQ of 112?
A Platoon.
Lab
wrote:
>DOES ANY ONE HAVE ANY GOOD NIGGER JOKES
>
>
For all you nigger lovers !!!!!
Q: What do Ku Klux Klansmen do before they play cards?
A: Take out the spades and burn them.
Q: Did you hear about the new chap stick for niggers?
A: It comes in spray cans.
Q: Did you hear about the new version of poker in Los Angeles?
A: Four clubs beat a King.
Q: What do you do for a drowning nigger?
A: Throw him an anchor.
Q: Why do niggers smear shit on the walls at weddings?
A: To keep flies off the bride.
Q: How is a nigger different from a sewer rat?
A: Some people actually like sewer rats.
Q: How do you know dogs are smarter than niggers?
A: They don't step in dog shit, and they have twice as many chances.
Q: What is considered good behavior in a Harlem school?
A: Raising your hand before you pop a cap in the teacher.
Q: Did you hear about the new video game called "Black Man?"
A: It's a pair of lips chasing a watermelon.
Q: How can you tell if a nigger is lying?
A: His lips are moving.
Q: How can you tell if a nigger is well hung?
A: You can't get your finger between his neck and the rope.
Q: What do you throw a nigger when he is drowning.
A: His family.
Q: Why are all niggers fast?
A: Because all the slow ones are in jail.
Q: What's the difference between Batman and a nigger?
A: Batman can survive without Robin.
Q: What is the most common form of transportation in Harlem?
A: Ambulances.
black people are great,
i even have a couple in my family tree.
tommorow morning i'll cut em' dowm.
What qualifies as good behavior in a Harlem school?
...Raising your hand before you pop a cap in the teacher.
What happens every time a nigger gets an abortion?
...Crime Stoppers sends her a check for $500.
What do you call a nigger at a KKK rally?
...Soon to be an ex-nigger.
What do you say to a black man in uniform?
..."I'll have a Big Mac with cheese and a coke."
What is a nigger's favorite anti-perspirant?
...Unemployment.
How can you spot a Black masochist?
...He's the one working for a living.
Hear about the black version of "Shogun"?
...It's called "Shonuff".
What do poor nigger kids use instead of Play-Doh ?
...Fresh dog shit.
Hear about the new bumper sticker that says "Run, Jesse, Run"?
...You put it on the front of your car.
How do you get a black kid to take a shower?
...Open a fire hydrant, and start selling crack on the other side.
How has Jesse Jackson lost the vote of most niggers?
...He promised to create jobs for them if elected.
Hear about the new Chap Stick for niggers?
...It comes in a spray can.
What's the difference between good nigger kids and bad nigger kids?
...Good nigger kids are in medium security prisons.
How do you starve a nigger?
...Hide the food stamps and welfare checks under a bar of soap.
What is the most common form of transportation in Harlem?
...Ambulances.
Did you hear about the nigger and the Mexican who opened a restaurant?
...It's called Nacho Mama.
What do you call 100 parachuting niggers?
...Skeet.
Why did all the blacks die in Vietnam?
...When the sergent said "Get down!", they got up and started dancing.
What did the black kid get for Christmas?
...My bike.
How do you scare a black person?
...Take him to an auction.
What do you call a black-midget in Ireland?
...A lepra-coon.
What are the six words you never ever want to hear?
..."Hi, I be yo' new neighbor."
********sent up to here to zetnet************
How is transportation being improved in Harlem?
...They're planting the trees closer together.
Why do blacks call white people "honkies"?
...That's the last noise they hear before the white people run them
over.
How was break dancing invented?
...By black kids stealing hubcaps from moving cars.
Why does California have so many fags and New York have so many
niggers?
...California had first choice.
What do you call a white guy surrounded by three blacks?
...A victim.
Twenty blacks?
...Coach
Thirty?
...Quarterback
200 blacks?
...warden
What is the difference between a "RAP" group's manager and a
proctologist?
...A proctologist only deals with one asshole at a time.
What's green and pink and purple and orange?
...A nigger dressed for church.
What is the New York State motto? ..."Eat, Drink and be Merry, for
tomorrow you may be killed by a nigger in
Central park."
What do you say to a nigger in a three-piece suit?
..."Will the defendant please rise."
Why don't niggers celebrate Thanksgiving.?
..."Kentucky Fried Chicken" isn't open on holidays
Did you hear about the nigger with insomnia?
...He lept waking up twice a week.
What do niggers say during foreplay?
..."If you scream, bitch, I'll kill you!"
If Tarzan and Jane were black, what would Cheetah be?
...The brains of the outfit.
What is eight miles long and has an I.Q. of 68?
...The "Martin Luther King Day" parade.
How do you stop five niggers from raping a white woman?
...Thrown them a basketball.
What's the first thing taught in a Harlem driving school?
...How to unlock a car with a coat hanger.
What do you call an unborn nigger baby?
...Janitor in a drum.
Why aren't there any sandboxes in Harlem?
...Cats keep trying to bury the baby niggers.
Hear about the new perfume for black women?
...It's called "Eau de doo dah day."
Why are so many niggers moving to Detroit?
...They heard there were no jobs there.
What is white yet has a black asshole?
...The Washington D.C. Mayor's office.
What does cotton have in common with noses?
...Niggers are good at picken both.
What do you call a conversation betwen Jesse Jackson & James Brown?
...Gibberish
Why was the wheelbarrow invented?
...To teach Niggers to walk on their hind legs.
Why do niggers stink?
...So blind people can hate them too.
What is printed on all African products?
..."Untouched by human hands."
What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead nigger
in the road?
...Skid marks in front of the dog.
How many niggers does it take to roof a building?
...Ten, if you slice them thin enough.
a man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.
"wow! where did you get it?" asks the bartender. "africa!" says the
parrot.
what happens when you shoot a black man riding a bike?
you get your bike back.
how do you stop a black man from drowning?
take your foot off his head! second prize: put a rock in the water!
what do you call a black preacher?
holy shit!
jesse jackson calls george at the white house and says "george, i
understand that all of the washing machines at the white house are
white."
george responds,"i dunno jesse, let me check it out and i'll call you
back." next day george calls jesse back and says,"jesse, you were
right. i
checked it out and all the washing machines at the white house are
white,
but all the agitators are black!"
a black man is visiting china when he sees a couple go up to a
fountain and
throw in a coin. it echos "ching chang ching". he asks them why they
did
this and they said, "the echo shows your heritage!" so the black man
threw
in a coin and the sound came back... "chim pan zee".
what did oprah winfrey's husband say when oprah asked to try a new
position?
how now brown cow?
a black man asked a good-looking white woman, "let's play the road
game!"
"what's that?" she said. "you lay down and i'll blacktop you!"
why don't black women make good nuns?
they can't say "superior" after "mother".
what is "fee fi fo fee fi fo fo"?
a black guy's phone number!
what's the difference between a black pussy and a bowling ball?
you can eat a bowling ball.
what color is a nigger after you run over him in the street?
flat black.
what do you call 10 niggers on a white guy?
a fair fight.
what do you get when you cross a nigger with a gorilla?
a dumber gorilla.
what does it say inside a nigger's lips?
"inflate to 20 psi."
what does harlem have in common with florsheim?
10,000 black loafers.
why don't niggers like convertibles?
because their lips flap in the wind.
what do you have when you put 10,000 blacks at the bottom of the
ocean?
a good start.
why does a black man usually keep his fly open?
in case he has to count to eleven.
how do you spell cocoon?
n-nigger.
what do you call four niggers in a cadillac?
grand theft auto.
what does "pontiac" stand for in harlem?
poor old nigger thinks it's a cadillac.
what did jesse jackson say about the abortion bill?
"the check's in the mail."
did you hear about the 4 new legal holidays proposed for blacks?
1. reggie jackson day. 2. michael jackson day. 3. jesse jackson day.
4. september 21, the day new cadillacs come out.
a plane in the air is about to crash. on the plane is jesse jackson,
the
president of the u.s., a priest and a school boy. there are only 3
parachutes left on the plane. as the plane is going down, the
president
says "i'm the smartest white man in america!" he jumps out with a
parachute. jesse jackson says "i'm the smartest black man in america!"
he
jumps out with the 2nd. there is only 1 parachute left now. the priest
then
says to the kid..."listen, child. i have lived my life and i want you
to
have a chance to live yours. you take the lastparachute." the kid
says,
"don't worry, we can both have a parachute, the smartest black man in
america just took my school bag!"
the dirtiest word in harlem and watts? work.
what do you call a black man in thailand? a tycoon.
what's the most confusing day in harlem? father's day.
what do you call a black man in a tree? a branch manager.
the 2 most famous black women in history?
aunt jemima and mutha fucka.
what do they do with dead blacks in florida?
they skin them and use them for wet suits.
what do you call a black smurf? a smigger.
why does georgia have blacks and california have earthquakes?
california had first pick.
how do you tell if a black has been shot in the head?
by the hole in his ghetto blaster.
why did the black not want to marry a mexican?
he didn't want his kids to grow up too lazy to steal.
what do you do when you cross a black with a greek?
a guy who doesn't mind riding in the back of the bus.
what's black, has white eyes and knocks on glass?
a nigger in a microwave.
why don't blacks like blow jobs?
they don't like jobs period.
where did vanessa williams' parents pose nude?
national geographic.
why do blacks always have sex on their minds?
because they have pubic hair growing on their heads.
why do blacks have such big dicks?
because god was so sorry about what he did to their hair.
what do you call a black woman with braces?
a black & decker pecker wrecker.
what do you call a bunch of blacks buried in a field up to their
necks?
afroturf.
in the depression, 2 darkies were screwin' on the railroad tracks when
a
train approached. cried the man to the train, "i's a comin', youse a
comin', but youse the one with the brakes!"
what's long, black & smelly?
an unemployment line in the u.s.
what do you get when you cross a black with a sioux indian?
a sioux named boy.
what do you get when you cross a black guy with a japanese guy?
a guy who has an uncontrollable urge on dec. 7th to attack pearl
bailey.
why do blacks keep chickens?
to teach their kids how to walk.
how do you make a black person nervous?
take him to an auction.
why did god invent the climax?
so niggers would know when to stop fucking.
the definition of worthless?
a 7' black with a 4" prick who can't play basketball.
why do blacks wear wide-brimmed hats?
so pigeons can't shit on their lips.
what do you get when you cross a black with a groundhog?
six more weeks of basketball season.
how do we know that adam and eve weren't black?
ever try to take ribs away from a black?
did you hear about the little black kid who had diarrhea?
he thought he was melting.
if a wac is a white woman in the army, what is a black woman in the
army
called?
a waccoon.
why did the black kid have the biggest dick in 5th grade? he was 21.
what do black people call the easter bunny? dinner.
did you hear about the new black french restaurant?
it's called chez what?
what do you call 4 blacks in a '57 chevy? a blood vessel.
what's black and shines in the dark? oakland.
what did lincoln say after his 5-day drunk? "i freed who?"
why do blacks like to wear white gloves?
so they won't bite off their fingers eating tootsie rolls.
why do black men have such narrow hips?
so the roasting pole won't wobble.
what's black and white, black and white, and black, white and red?
a nigger and a pelican fighting over a carp.
what do you get if you put odor eaters in a black's shoes?
half a mile down the road you get a gold tooth, radio, and a
pair of tennis shoes.
what does the "n" stand for in atlanta's spelman (black) college?
"nowledge".
what did buckwheat (of little rascals' fame) call himself when he
became a
basketball player?
kareem a'wheat.
why are the palms and soles of black people white?
they were spray-painted while assuming the position.
how do you get rid of a bunch of libyans?
tell a bunch of cajuns they're good eating and out of season.
what do you call a white cock in a black pussy?
blonde with black roots.
what do you call a white cock in a black pussy?
blackened whitefish.
what do you call a white cock in a black pussy?
reverse evolution.
what do you call a white cock in a black pussy?
white flight to the subhumans.
what do you call a black cock in a white pussy?
forced integration.
what do you call a black cock in a white pussy?
turd in the snow. second prize: cigar in the sand.
what do you call a black cock in a white pussy?
a tight fit.
what do you call a black cock in a white pussy?
paying for white guilt.
what do you call a black cock in a white pussy?
a well-fed cat.
what do you call it when a black man rapes a white woman?
forced bussing.
what do you call it when a white man rapes a black woman?
stocking the plantation.
who won the race down the tunnel, the black or the pollock?
the pollock, because the black had to stop and write "motherfucker" on
the
wall.
the definition of an african momeback?
the black that rides on the back of the garbage truck yelling,
"momeback,
momeback!"
why did god invent golf?
so that white people could dress up like blacks.
what's black and white and red all over?
an interracial couple in an auto wreck.
why is the pubic hair of a negress as stiff as a wire brush?
so she can do housework at the local stream.
why do some white chicks prefer black men?
for the same reason that some black chicks prefer horses.
what has 10 legs and says "hodedo hodedo"?
five blacks running for an elevator.
why do blacks like watermelon?
they finally have something big enough to use those lips on.
why do blacks like chitlins?
they are used to ropes.
why do blacks like ribs?
the sauce paints their faces red.
why did the nigger cross the road?
he smelled chicken.
how did the nigger cross the road?
on another nigger's spear.
what do tourists have to watch out for in african restrooms?
gay limbo dancers.
what's the difference between a nigger and a tire?
a tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it.
why don't black babies like to play in sandboxes?
because cats keep trying to cover them up.
why don't they circumcize niggers?
because there's no end to those pricks.
what did the black man do after he caught a white woman's baby
she threw out of the window during a fire?
spiked it on the ground and shouted "touchdown!"
the 3 greatest lies?
the check's in the mail, black is beautiful, and i won't
cum in your mouth.
why aren't there any black skiers?
because their lips explode at high altitude.
what do you get when you cross a nigger with a monkey?
nothing, no monkey is dumb enough to fuck a nigger.
a nigger, a frenchman, a german, and a pollock were sitting in a bar.
"i
like to fuck white women!" said the nigger. "that's grand!" said the
frenchman. "gut for you!" said the german. "i don't blame you," said
the
pollock, "i don't like fucking those black ones either."
why is a nigger like a miner?
they are both lower than dirt and dig dark cavities.
a white woman was being hit on by a black man in a bar.
"i don't believe in changing colors" she said politely.
what does a pussy have in common with a negro's head?
both have kinky hair, big lips, and smell after a 15-minute workout.
why do they call a half-black half-white child a mulatto?
they don't know whether it is a white shit on by a mule or a black
pissed
on by two.
what did the civil rights activist say after having quintuplets?
"i have overcome!"
in the same room were the presidents of the aclu, naacp, civil rights
commission, and the grand dragon of the kkk. in walks a beautiful
blonde
blue-eyed white woman with a dark chocolate negro husband followed by
some
light chocolate mulatto children. what happened?
they passed the chocolate.
why do condoms come in 7-packs for blacks, 9-packs for mexicans, and
12-packs for whites?
blacks do it every night, mexicans do it every night and twice on
weekends,
and whites do it about once a month.
the definition of endless love?
stevie wonder and ray charles playing tennis.
why does ray charles smile all the time?
he doesn't know he's black.
have you ever seen ray charles's dick?
don't worry, neither has he.
why does ray charles only have a left nut?
'cause you've got the right one, baby.
do you know what n.a.a.c.p stands for?
"niggers are actually colored pollocks".
why do blacks walk the way they do?
because they spent the first nine months of their lives dodging a coat
hanger.
why do black women eat watermelon with their panties off?
to keep the flies off the watermelon.
what would you call bo derek if she were black?
a ten of spades.
why do black guys wear high-heeled shoes?
to keep from scraping their knuckles when they walk.
why is the n.f.l. going to change to green footballs?
did you ever hear of a black dropping a watermelon?
anybody seen these plays in the football games lately?
nrl: definition.. nigga run left!
nrr: definition.. nigga run right!
spdn: definition.. same play different nigga!
wbcr - white boy can't run
ymgf - yo ma good fuck
have you heard about the new black disaster movie?
it's called a-pack-of-lips now.
how come there were no black people in the flintstones?
they were all apes back then.
what do you call two black motorcycle cops?
chocolate chips.
what do you call a black with a c.b.?
thief! thief!
what is sickle-cell anemia?
aids for spades.
why does mike tyson cry during sex?
mace will do that to you.
what do you get when you cross a black and a frenchman?
jacques cousteaudian.
how come there are so few black astronauts?
they don't like saying "yes nasa, no nasa...".
did you hear about the two black guys on "that's incredible"?
one had a job, and the other knew his father.
what did god say when he made his second black man?
"oops, burned another one."
what is the "harlem rap"?
"watermelon, chitlins, cadillac car, we're not as dumb as you think we
is."
did you hear about the toy store in harlem? it's called "toys'b'us."
what did kunta-kinte say when they chopped his foot? "where my
toe-be?"
this guy has a girlfriend named wendy, and he really wants to impress
her
on their first night, so he goes into the tattoo parlor to get her
name
tattooed on his penis. the tattooist said "most of the time, though,
it
will only read 'wy'". he said that was ok and went ahead and got the
tattoo
done. well his girlfriend was really impressed, and his sex life was
great
from then on.
one day he was at a public washroom and he saw a jamaican guy at the
urinal
beside him. looking down, he saw the guy had 'wy' tattooed on his
penis
too.
"wow, is your girlfriend's name wendy too?" he asked.
"dream on, mine say 'welcome to jamaica and have a nice day'".
two black guys from the city decide to go hunting out in the country.
they're out all day and haven't shot a thing so they are about to give
up.
right about then they manage to shoot a
small furry animal with rings on its tail and what looks like a mask
over
its eyes. well they've never seen such a creature so they decide to
stop at
a farm house on the way back and ask
the people to identify it for them. when the door to the farm house is
opened there stands the farmers wife. the two black men ask "could you
tell
us what we done shot?" to which the farmers wife replies "well that's
a,
it's a, well you see it's what you folks call each other". the one
black
turns to the other and says, "how 'bout that leroy, we done shot us a
mother fucker!!"
two black guys are in a hotel room, and the first one says, "hey man,
let's
get a couple of white girls up here." the second one says, "are you
crazy?
don't you know this is mississippi?"
and the first guy says, "yeah, so? i just want to fuck em not go to
school
with em."
three south africans, two whites and a black, had just recieved their
sentences and were enroute to prison. they rode in silence for a while
until finaly one white addressed the other: "what did you do and what
did
you get?" the second white answered: "killed a black man, got
sentenced to
2 years, but considering the circumstances, i'll be out in a year. how
about you?" the first white responded: "killed a family of blacks, got
sentenced to five years, but considering the circumstances, i'll be
out in
about 2 years". they rode in silence until finaly one white turned to
the
black and said "what did you do and what did you get?" the black
replied "i rode my bycycle without a headlight, got sentencedto 30
years,
but considering it was daylight, i hope to be out in 15 years."
Q: Where do niggers practice birth control?
A: In the delivery room.
Q: What is a black birth certificate?
A: A refund letter from a condom company.
Q: What was the only thing missing at the Million Man March?
A: An auctioneer.
Q: What would you call the Flintstones if they were black?
A: Niggers.
Q: Why was the nigger boy so interested in his family tree?
A: His family was still living in it.
Q: How do you keep niggers out of your back yard?
A: Hang one in the front yard.
Q: What should you do if you see a nigger jogger?
A: Trip him and give the ladiy's purse back to her.
Q: How has Jesse Jackson lost the votes of most niggers?
A: He promised to create jobs for them if elected.
Q: What do poor nigger kids use instead of Play-Doh?
A: Fresh dog shit.
Q: What do you say to a black man in uniform?
A: "I'll have a Big Mac with cheese and a coke."
Q: How do you know that Santa Claus is a colored guy?
A: Because nobody except a nigger would wear a bright red suit.
Hear about the black version of "Shogun?"
It's called "Shonuff."
Q: A nigger and a Puerto Rican are in the same car at the same time.
Who's driving?
A: The cop.
Q: What's the difference between a dead nigger in the road and a dead
dog in the road?
A: Skid marks in front of the dog.
Why did everyone make such a big deal out of the Million Man March?
There's one
outside the welfare office every day.
Q: How come there was such a good turnout at the Million Man March?
A: Only eight of them had to take off work.
Q: Why do niggers tint their car windows?
A: They don't. It's the black rubbing off.
Q: What's the difference between a nigger pussy and a bowling ball?
A: You can eat a bowling ball.
Q: How do you wipe out 250 ape families?
A: Blow up K Mart.
Q: Why don't sharks attack niggers?
A: They mistake them for whale shit.
Q: What do you call two nigger motorcycle cops?
A: Chocolate CHIPS.
Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker?
A: Stranded.
Q: How do you get 400 niggers in an Escort?
A: I don't know, but they figure it out.
Q: How do you get twelve niggers in a volkswagon?
A: Toss a welfare check in hte back seat.
Q: What's the difference between a pothole and a nigger?
A: You'd swerve to avoid a pothole, wouldn't you?
Q: What do you call a nigger with an IQ of 15?
A: Gifted.
Q: What do you call a nigger with an IQ of 150?
A: Tribe.
Q: What do you call a baby nigger?
A: 1. Niglet
2. Bat
Q: How do you get a nigger to commit suicide?
A: 1. Toss a bucket of KFC into traffic.
2. End welfare.
Q: What do you call three blacks at a Klan barbeque?
1. Charcoal
2. Kentucky Fried Nigger
Q: Why are rectal thermometers banned in Africa?
A: They cause too much brain damage.
Q: What is dumber than a dumb Puerto Rican?
A: A smart nigger.
Q: What do you call a nigger with a war medal?
A: A thief.
Q: Is it better to be born black or gay?
A: Black. Because you don't have to tell your parents.
Q: What is the first lesson you receive at a nigger driving school?
A: How to unlock a car with a bent hanger.
Q: What did the nigger say when his sister had a baby?
A: "I'll be a monkey's uncle!"
Q: What do you get when you cross a nigger with a gorilla?
A: A moron who doesn't have to wear winter underwear.
Q: Why do niggers have big dicks?
A: It's God's apology for putting pubic hair on their heads.
Q: Why do lions in Africa go around licking each others' rear end?
A: To get the taste of nigger out of their mouths.
Q: Why does Georgia have niggers and California have earthquakes?
A: California had first pick.
Q: What do you call a black smurf?
A: A smigger.
Q: What do you call 10,000 niggers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start.
Q: What does PONTIAC stand for?
A: Poor Old Nigger Thinks It's A Cadillac.
Q: What's the definition of black foreplay?
A: Don't scream or I'll kill you.
Q: Why do niggers smell?
A: So blind people can hate them too.
Q: Do you know why all niggers want to go to Taiwan?
A: Because they want to be Tycoons.
Q: Why do niggers have such big nostrils?
A: That's where God held them up to paint them.
Q: Do you know what a worthless nigger is?
A: 7'2"; can't play basketball; has a 2" pecker.
Q: Do you know why there aren't many niggers in Denver?
A: The high altitude will burst their lips.
Q: How do you keep five niggers from raping a white girl?
A: Toss them a basketball.
Q: How many niggers does it take to have a funeral?
A: Seven. Six to carry the casket and one to carry the tape deck.
Q: What do you call a high rise built for niggers?
A: A coon-dominium.
Q: Do you know what color a nigger is that jumps off the Empire State
Building?
A: Flat Black.
Q: Do you know the name of the first nigger scuba diver?
A: Jacques Custodian.
Q: What's transparent and lays in the gutter?
A: A nigger with the shit knocked out of him.
Q: What is the cause of Sickle Cell Anemia?
A: Licking food stamps.
Q: What do you call a twelve year old nigger virgin?
A: U-G-L-Y.
Q: What do you call a nigger with a wooden leg?
A: Shit on a stick.
Q: Why is the national flag of Africa red, black and green?
A: It's the color of a watermelon.
Q: How many niggers does it take to shingle a house?
A: One. Depending on how thin you slice him.
Q: What do you call a nigger with a chain in a dark alley?
A: "Sir."
Q: Why do niggers wear wide brimmed hats?
A: To keep the bird shit off their lips.
Q: How many niggers does it take to pave a blacktop driveway?
A: One. If you spread him real thin.
Q: What does NAACP stand for?
A: Niggers Are Actually Colored Polacks.
Q: What's imprinted on the inside of a nigger's bottom lip?
A: Inflate to forty pounds per square inch.
Q: What's the difference between niggers and snow tires?
A: Snow tires don't sing when we put chains on them.
Q: Why do niggers call white people honkies?
A: That's the last sound they hear before we run over them.
Q: What do you call a nigger that won't work?
A: Average.
Q: What do you call a nigger with no arms and no legs?
A: Trustworthy.
"Hey, Leroy, how'd your sister get that black eye?"
"She was jumping rope and forgot to put her bra on."
Did you hear about the nigger who put odor eaters in his shoes? He
took
two steps and disappeared.
Did you hear about the nigger who died riding in a car going 40 mph?
His
lips beat him to death.
Did you hear about the little black kid who had diarrhea? He thought
he
was melting.
Did you hear that the KKK voted Marvin Gaye Sr. Father Of The Year?
Three niggers on That's Incredible: The first had a job, the second
had auto
insurance and the third was an only child.
Q: What's the difference between good nigger kids and bad nigger kids?
A: Good nigger kids are in medium security prisons.
Q: How do you get niggers to take a shower?
A: Open a fire hydrant on one side of the street, and start selling
crack
on the other.
Person #1: What was the name of the little black boy on "The Jetsons?"
Person #2: There was no little black boy on "The Jetsons."
Person #1: Isn't the future wonderful?
One man was sent to jail, and he was very afraid that the
other
convicts would rape him. He was even more frightened when he found
himself
in a cell with a huge nigger, and the nigger said, "Let's play Mommy &
Daddy. Which do you want to be?"
"Daddy, if you don't mind," replied the man.
"All right," replied the nigger. "Come over here and suck
Momma's
dick."
Tyrone returns home from school following his first day in
sixth
grade. His father asks him how school went and Tyrone begins to tell
his
father everything that happened that day. After describing the day's
events, Tyrone questions his father, "Dad, when all us boys were
showerin'
after gym class, I happened to notice that my dick was much larger
than
all of the other boys'. Is it because I'm black, Daddy?"
"No, Tyrone," his father replies, "It's because you're
nineteen."
A Swedish blonde girl marries a Swedish blonde guy. A couple
of
months later they are waiting for a new baby. Well, time passes and
the
new baby is born. At the hospital, soon after delivery, the happy
father
receives the visit from the doctor.
"Doc, how is my baby?"
"Well, I have good news and bad news. Bad news first. The baby
is
black. Nigger, black, Afro American, whatever you like, but it is a
black
baby."
"It's not possible. My wife and me are white. I can't believe
it.
Is it possible to have any good news?"
"Well, the good news is that the baby died."
Q: Why are black babies jealous of cabbage patch dolls?
A: Because each cabbage patch doll comes with a birth certificate.
Q: Why did God give niggers 2% more brains than horses?
A: Because he didn't want them shitting in the streets during parades.
A black man was climbing the ghostly stairs to heaven. As he
approached the golden gates, St. Peter asked the man, "Hold it right
there. What have you done in your life that would grant you entry to
eternal life?"
"Well," the black man replied, "I went to the Grand Dragon of
the Ku Klux Klan, during a ceremony, and told him to his face he was a
scum sucking faggot."
"Oh, really," and unbelieving St. Peter snorted, "And when did
you do this?"
The black man replied, "Oh, about two minutes ago."
Q: How come there were so many wrong estimates of how many niggers
there
were at the Million Man March?
A 1: They forgot to count the ones in the trees.
A 2: They got the crowd estimate by counting the beer cans and
multiplying by six.
CheechWizard
>> does anyone have a screwdriver to lever up this fuckwit's shift key - or
>> even better, take his computer apart and shove the component parts down
>> his throat?
>> --
>> Yours, "There was this rabbit, and it
>> Loz walked into a butchers..."
>> mailto:l...@hensel.demon.co.uk
>> http://www.hensel.demon.co.uk - The Hub Of Cheese
>
>You are too funny.When I was in the Marine Corp my D.I told us only
>faggots and sailors were named Laurence.I'm gonna go out on a limb here
>and guess that you are not at sea.Now,shut the fuck up and let the man
>get some nigger jokes.Who the fuck made you King of this NG?Some faggot
>election in the UK?And before you go off on America,just fucking
>remember that an American white male invented the internet.You people in
>your second class countries wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for
>Americans.So shut your jellied eel hole and leave the man alone.
..damn...larry.....looks like you just
the proverbial bone up the ass........
RamSys
> You are too funny.When I was in the Marine Corp my D.I told us only
> faggots and sailors were named Laurence.I'm gonna go out on a limb here
> and guess that you are not at sea.Now,shut the fuck up and let the man
> get some nigger jokes.Who the fuck made you King of this NG?Some faggot
> election in the UK?And before you go off on America,just fucking
> remember that an American white male invented the internet.You people in
> your second class countries wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for
> Americans.So shut your jellied eel hole and leave the man alone.
>
And you claim you have been in this ng for years? Goddamn you're one
ignorant motherfucker... And if you don't know what i'm talking about, I
suggest you learn to read first...
You call us second class countries?? You fucking admitted that you are
italian you moron!! And if there is one second-class country in western
europe... (Don't get me wrong, I love the place, they only have a problem
with getting their financials straightened out).
So, as I have stated before... If it wasn't for "us second class
countries", there would BE no U.S.A. you fuckwit!!
And who the fuck is this american white male you refer to? It better not
be Tim Berners-Lee, because he was... british! And I KNOW he "only"
invented the WWW, but Arpanet was a teameffort so let's see you come up
with a name here.
Btw, I guess a D.I. means a Dick Inserter? The homosexual practices in
the U.S. army are well known, even though everyone is doing their
utmost to hide them... Loz, maybe you should get yourself drafted?
--
_________________________________________________________
OBJ: A blonde walks into a grocery and wants to buy
a cucumber... Then she asks for the dressingroom...
+Wayne
>Hey, John, what do you call a Marine with an IQ of 112?
>
>
>
>
>
>A Platoon.
This entire post is a ruse started by John Cassella at j-b...@home.com
who is actually Bigdick6 still trying to get us to flame that address.
For some reason he likes to start shit and then act like "why all this
shit?". He's the biggest (or smallest) ybf in the group.
___________________________________________________________________
Main cause of death for hummingbirds: Crashing ass-first into trees.
+Wayne
OBJpunchline: "Here, let me hold your monkey."
+Wayne
>You are too funny.When I was in the Marine Corp my D.I told us only
>faggots and sailors were named Laurence.I'm gonna go out on a limb here
>and guess that you are not at sea.Now,shut the fuck up and let the man
>get some nigger jokes.Who the fuck made you King of this NG?Some faggot
>election in the UK?And before you go off on America,just fucking
>remember that an American white male invented the internet.You people in
>your second class countries wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for
>Americans.So shut your jellied eel hole and leave the man alone.
Who the fuck made you the king of this NG? Your just some faggot asshole
who doesn't even read what was posted. The attack was on the man's use
of all capital letters, asshole! Just like I am now attacking you for
not using a fucking space bar. But I'm sure you'll mistake this for some
kind of rant about racism. You trully are the biggest ass I've ever met.
Fucking marine faggot.
Your wife sends her best...her blow jobs could use some work.
Laurence Hensel
>You are too funny.When I was in the Marine Corp my D.I told us only
>faggots and sailors were named Laurence.I'm gonna go out on a limb here
>and guess that you are not at sea.
exact fact less that two weeks ago?
>Now,shut the fuck up and let the man
>get some nigger jokes.
It was the fact that he was quite obviously a total cunt of a fuckwitted
ybf that pissed me off...
>Who the fuck made you King of this NG?
I seem to vaguely remembert claiming to be God at least once - I still
have a following outside the NG
>Some faggot
>election in the UK?And before you go off on America,just fucking
>remember that an American white male invented the internet.
Ever heard of Turing? - he didn't invent it because the technology
didn't really exist, buy he certainly thought of the idea (that and made
huge advances in AI) - To my knowledge he was British, but I could be
wrong. He was also apparently gay... And there's one theory that
Skakespeare was too...
>You people in
>your second class countries wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for
>Americans.So shut your jellied eel hole and leave the man alone.
No - I'm expressing that very right to be heard, and don't try to claim
you have any right to take it away...
Laurence Hensel
>Hey, John, what do you call a Marine with an IQ of 112?
>
>
>
>
>
>A Platoon.
I think you stuttered on the "1" key in the set-up line...
Laurence Hensel
<ramsys...@bigfoot.com> writes
>
>Btw, I guess a D.I. means a Dick Inserter? The homosexual practices in
>the U.S. army are well known, even though everyone is doing their
>utmost to hide them... Loz, maybe you should get yourself drafted?
I can't stand the authoritarian bastards in control - I'm not into
domination in any form... And anyway, how are you supposed to fight for
freedom when you are in one of the most regimented and controled
organisations in existance...
Incedentally, here in the UK the terms sailor and ducky are synonyms for
uphill gardener...
OverMuch
>>
>>A Platoon.
>
>I think you stuttered on the "1" key in the set-up line...
SLAM!
Next!
Laughing my ass off,
OverMuch
John
+Wayne wrote:
>
> Blob <rfl...@flash.net> wrote:
>
> >Hey, John, what do you call a Marine with an IQ of 112?
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >A Platoon.
>
> This entire post is a ruse started by John Cassella at j-b...@home.com
> who is actually Bigdick6 still trying to get us to flame that address.
> For some reason he likes to start shit and then act like "why all this
> shit?". He's the biggest (or smallest) ybf in the group.
John
two years.Who gets called when your freedom is at risk? ME!! I never had
to fight,but if I was told to I would have.Gee,I guess I was stupid to
join up.I gave up two years of my life so that an admited ass fucking,
cocksucking fruit loop could tell some one else to be quiet when he used
a word you didn't like.So,I guess that means a Marine's I.Q. is even
lower than what you think.But at least we have the basic instinct to put
our dicks in women rather than each others assholes.Go catch AIDS,you
fucking jiz sucker.
RamSys
Give it up kid, we're not going to bite. And if I did, you'd be too busy
cleaning up your mailbox for the next week or so. I've got some nice big
Oracle help-files here...
RamSys
> In article <MPG.108c2c5f...@news.worldonline.nl>, RamSys
> <ramsys...@bigfoot.com> writes
> >
> >Btw, I guess a D.I. means a Dick Inserter? The homosexual practices in
> >the U.S. army are well known, even though everyone is doing their
> >utmost to hide them... Loz, maybe you should get yourself drafted?
>
> I can't stand the authoritarian bastards in control - I'm not into
> domination in any form... And anyway, how are you supposed to fight for
> freedom when you are in one of the most regimented and controled
> organisations in existance...
>
> Incedentally, here in the UK the terms sailor and ducky are synonyms for
> uphill gardener...
You lost me on that last bit buddy... my english isn't perfect you
know... :-)
+Wayne
>I'm still waiting for that mail,asshole.I am who I say.
If your mail fits in your asshole then I am certainly finished with you.
*plonk*
+Wayne
>Asshole,How do you figure I'm trying to take it away?I was a Marine for
>two years.
Two years? Was this the prison plan? How can you only serve for 2 years?
>Who gets called when your freedom is at risk? ME!! I never had
>to fight,but if I was told to I would have.
Then how do you know you are the one to get called if you were never
called. Seems to me that a lot of calling was done in the last decade
and yet you say you were never called. I guess I owe you as much as you
think I do.
>Gee,I guess I was stupid to
>join up.I gave up two years of my life so that an admited ass fucking,
>cocksucking fruit loop could tell some one else to be quiet when he used
>a word you didn't like.
Oh so you joined the Marines for an *unheard of* 2 year stint so you
could police the newsgroups on the internet. Fuck! Where do I sign?
>So,I guess that means a Marine's I.Q. is even
>lower than what you think.But at least we have the basic instinct to put
>our dicks in women rather than each others assholes.Go catch AIDS,you
>fucking jiz sucker.
Shit! Biggest fucking jizwiz fags are marines. You probably know half of
them. Go look in the mirror and introduce yourself.
OverMuch
>to fight,but if I was told to I would have.
TWO YEARS? You fucking pussy. You goddamn, chicken shit, momma's
tit-suckling pussy. Couldn't handle it, could you? Maybe you should have
gotten the hell out of the way and let a SOLDIER do the job, you cunt.
BTW, I WAS called up, and I DID fight....take your TWO years and shove it
directly up your ass with the rest of the Marine Corps. Fucking glorified
sailor.
OverMuch
Unknown
wrote:
>This entire post is a ruse started by John Cassella at j-b...@home.com
>who is actually Bigdick6 still trying to get us to flame that address.
>For some reason he likes to start shit and then act like "why all this
>shit?". He's the biggest (or smallest) ybf in the group.
>Main cause of death for hummingbirds: Crashing ass-first into trees.
>+Wayne
>OBJpunchline: "Here, let me hold your monkey."
handle tagged to some other mother fucker. i'm not john, i'm not
j-bone, i'm not at home...so fuck off!
just thought i'ld let your dumbass know before you gits yourself into
a spam war.
bigduke6
ps-your welcome
+Wayne
>sorry asswipe, but you got the wrong name, wrong email, and wrong
>handle tagged to some other mother fucker. i'm not john, i'm not
>j-bone, i'm not at home...so fuck off!
>just thought i'ld let your dumbass know before you gits yourself into
>a spam war.
>bigduke6
>ps-your welcome
Bullshit punkfucker. You didn't show up until someone says your name?
Huh? That proves you're a lurking troll. What an ass...and thanks to
you...it was proven in full.
___________________________________________________________________
Main cause of death for hummingbirds: Crashing ass-first into trees.
+Wayne
OBJjoke: Typhoon rips through cemetary: Hundreds dead.
CheechWizard
>(bigduke6) wrote:
>
>>sorry asswipe, but you got the wrong name, wrong email, and wrong
>>handle tagged to some other mother fucker. i'm not john, i'm not
>>j-bone, i'm not at home...so fuck off!
>>just thought i'ld let your dumbass know before you gits yourself into
>>a spam war.
>>bigduke6
>>ps-your welcome
>
>Bullshit punkfucker. You didn't show up until someone says your name?
>Huh? That proves you're a lurking troll. What an ass...and thanks to
>you...it was proven in full.
...now, now, now...you gotz to
go easy on deep6duke....you see
the the bastard was a regular here but
he systematically got his ass reemed
.....it was just too much for him and
as a result he sulked....ran away in
tears and has resorted to the spineless
task of lurking........show the turd burger
some empathy......give generously.......
Unknown
wrote:
>Bullshit punkfucker. You didn't show up until someone says your name?
>Huh? That proves you're a lurking troll. What an ass...and thanks to
>you...it was proven in full.
>Main cause of death for hummingbirds: Crashing ass-first into trees.
>+Wayne
bigduke6
ps-please let us all know exactly what your foot tastes like
Ten
CheechWizard wrote in message <702e3v$t...@hermes.acs.unt.edu>...
>In article <362d8ba1...@news.donet.com>, wa...@NOSPAMS.no-way.com
(+Wayne) wrote:
>>(bigduke6) wrote:
>>
>>>sorry asswipe, but you got the wrong name, wrong email, and wrong
>>>handle tagged to some other mother fucker. i'm not john, i'm not
>>>j-bone, i'm not at home...so fuck off!
>>>just thought i'ld let your dumbass know before you gits yourself into
>>>a spam war.
>>>bigduke6
>>>ps-your welcome
>>
>>Huh? That proves you're a lurking troll. What an ass...and thanks to
>>you...it was proven in full.
>
>go easy on deep6duke....you see
>the the bastard was a regular here but
>he systematically got his ass reemed
>.....it was just too much for him and
>as a result he sulked....ran away in
>tears and has resorted to the spineless
>task of lurking........show the turd burger
>some empathy......give generously.......
bigduke6....are you going to just sit there and take this?
yo'll come back now yo hear.
10
*****
The meek shall inherit the Earth after we're done with it.
JEParham65
>>go easy on deep6duke....
Wait a fucking minute..... I thought it was BigDouche6...... when did it get
changed???>
-----
I didn't ask to be on your list, so don't expect me to
ask to be removed from it.
I am a confirmed Net Terrorist, Cabal (tinc) Secret Agent #13, and Unit #679 of
the Lumber Cartel (tinlc).
Spam me, and you will find out what that means.
Rhinestone Womble
RW>> I'm still waiting for that mail,asshole.I am who I say.
RW>
RW>Give it up kid,
What is this obsession with age here. i for one couldn't care less if I
was the only adult here and everyone else was spotty adolescents as long
as we get some funny jokes. Is anybody with me on this one...
CheechWizard
>>>Bullshit punkfucker. You didn't show up until someone says your name?
>>>Huh? That proves you're a lurking troll. What an ass...and thanks to
>>>you...it was proven in full.
>>
>>...now, now, now...you gotz to
>>go easy on deep6duke....you see
>>the the bastard was a regular here but
>>he systematically got his ass reemed
>>.....it was just too much for him and
>>as a result he sulked....ran away in
>>tears and has resorted to the spineless
>>task of lurking........show the turd burger
>>some empathy......give generously.......
>
>bigduke6....are you going to just sit there and take this?
>yo'll come back now yo hear.
...of course he is.......
CheechWizard
>...now, now, now...you gotz to
>
>
>Wait a fucking minute..... I thought it was BigDouche6...... when did it get
>changed???>
....right after we dropped the
name deepshit6..................
Gernot Lachner
> RW>Give it up kid,
> What is this obsession with age here.
we are all geriatrics in our second childhood fantasizing about tender meat.
> i for one couldn't care less if I was the only adult here
me for two.
> and everyone else was spotty adolescents as long as we get some
> funny jokes.
nothing wrong with spotty ones, you just need to fry them a bit longer to
disinfect them completely.
> Is anybody with me on this one...
sure - care to come over for dinner ?
--
sciathán leathair ~..~
"what's the matter, bat got your tongue?"
bd
> This entire post is a ruse started by John Cassella at j-b...@home.com
> who is actually Bigdick6 still trying to get us to flame that address.
So you had to go and spoil it for me - I hadn't seen the bagduck boy
around, and here I thought you folks had made an honest-to-God
improvement to atj.
> Main cause of death for hummingbirds: Crashing ass-first into trees.
Cool! Suddenly I feel so... immortal!
bd
--
"Send lawyers, guns, and money - the shit has hit the fan"
- W. Zevon
dodging the junk-mailers: remove the REMOVE from e-dress to reply
obj:
> test
Rhinestone Womble
RW> > funny jokes.
RW>nothing wrong with spotty ones, you just need to fry them a bit longer to
RW>disinfect them completely.
RW>
RW> > Is anybody with me on this one...
RW>sure - care to come over for dinner ?
Yeah, why not. Can we adolescents for the main course - roasted with a
little broccoline stuffing...