Abo Joke and Nigger Joke
Anonymous
Accent: aus
What are the 3 things you can't give to an Aborigine?
1. A white Face.
2. Straight Hair.
3. A Job.
Accent: usa
What are the 3 things you can't give to a Nigger?
1. A Black Eye.
2. A Fat Lip.
3. A Job.
Ravi Anamalay
(1) You feel inferior to blacks because your dick is under 6""
(2) Your sister & mother lost their virginity to blacks
(3) "" still prefer blacks
(4) You're girlfriend (or boyfriend) prefers blacks over you
(5) You're just a loser with nothing else to do
oh, by the way - tell you're mama I'm having someone else over tonite.
just though I'd try a slut over $5/blowjob for a change.
cheers,
ravi...
ps : is your mum ever going to get her dentures tightened ?
--
Ravi Anamalay
Dept. of Mechanical & Materials Engineering
University of Western Australia, WA 6970, AUSTRALIA.
email : anam...@uniwa.uwa.edu.au
Valerie Hall
>What a brave warrior you are, posting racist jokes anonymously.
>God, I admire you.
>A. Mathis
Boy I wish I'd thought of that one !!
Val
Zabadoo
1) A steady job
2) An education
3) A good paint job on his oversized hillbilly truck or double-wide
trailer (you pick)
What are 3 things white trash can't get?
1) Enough cheap beer
2) A girlfriend over the legal age
3) Enough banjo music and good dentures
The south is as dead as your redneck grandfather's dick. Time to wake up
and smell the 90's Joe Bob, Billy Joe, or whatever you like to be called.
By the way, I *am* white.
Nutter
wrote:
>Accent: aus
>What are the 3 things you can't give to an Aborigine?
>1. A white Face.
>2. Straight Hair.
>3. A Job.
Q. What's got two black eyes and fucks Abo's?
A. A double-barrelled shotgun...
Add the coon joke of your choice here:
Michael HART
One must post some jikes anonymously else one can find oneself on trouble with the
discriminatory anti-discrimination laws.
Jokes about race (Aboriginal), sex (women) etc can be considered harassment and
you can end up in court.
It doesn't matter that it is a 'jokes' forum.
One shouldn't have to be a 'brave warrior' to post a joke but the fact is one does
have to be.
In article <4dg817$k...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>, fres...@aol.com (Fresh816) writes:
|> What a brave warrior you are, posting racist jokes anonymously.
|>
|> God, I admire you.
|>
|> A. Mathis
--
+-------------------------------+------------------------------------+
| Michael HART | "If you want a straight line take |
| Dept of Professional Studies | only two points." |
| University Of New South Wales | "If reproducibility is a problem |
| mh...@solar.profs.unsw.edu.au | do the experiment only once." |
+-------------------------------+------------------------------------+
--
+-------------------------------+------------------------------------+
| Michael HART | "If you want a straight line take |
| Dept of Professional Studies | only two points." |
| University Of New South Wales | "If reproducibility is a problem |
fake
stuff) have a victim.
It is a matter of where you draw then line.
Most of this stuff seems contrived to cause offence and wasn't
humourous anyway.
Shaun Dore
: In article <4djhf1$c...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>, jparh...@aol.com says...
: >
: >Come on people! Black is beautiful!!!
: >
: >Then again, nigger is not a color.
: I can't believe that so many people get all uptight over this.
: It's a JOKE it's meant to be funny.. Now i'm not racist i have friends of all
: differen't creeds and cultures but i still found one of the jokes humerous.
: I mean even when i was 8years old there were Irish Jokes, and then Blond
: jokes, Abo jokes... If we can't laugh at ourselves, then we just can't laugh.
: Wake up and enjoy life, stop taking things so personally.
: Sly!
Couldnt agree more.
--
Paul J Robinson - cg...@firebird.newcastle.edu.au
Geekcoke 3.0 GE d(++) s--:--- a-- C++++ UL+++>++++ US++(+++) P+ L+++(++)>+++++
E--- W+ N++(+++) w--- M-- V-- PS PE Y PGP(+) t+++ 5-- !X R tv++(+) b+++ D+++
G+(++) e>++ h++(+) r++>!r y?
People who like windows 95 havent used it enuf...
Mark Addinall
: One must post some jikes anonymously else one can find oneself on trouble with the
: discriminatory anti-discrimination laws.
So fucking what.
: Jokes about race (Aboriginal), sex (women) etc can be considered harassment and
: you can end up in court.
So any form of humour that deals with abo's or wimmin is banned heh?
What about kikes, slopes, wogs, spicks, paddies, seppos or pommies.
: It doesn't matter that it is a 'jokes' forum.
: One shouldn't have to be a 'brave warrior' to post a joke but the fact is one does
: have to be.
So this is what the society wants to become. Disgusting.
"What's the difference between your dog whinging at the
back door, and your missus whinging at the front door...
The bitch at the backdoor generally shuts up when you let
it in the house"
: In article <4dg817$k...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>, fres...@aol.com (Fresh816) writes:
: |> What a brave warrior you are, posting racist jokes anonymously.
: |>
: |> God, I admire you.
: |>
: |> A. Mathis
: --
: +-------------------------------+------------------------------------+
: | Michael HART | "If you want a straight line take |
: | Dept of Professional Studies | only two points." |
: | University Of New South Wales | "If reproducibility is a problem |
: | mh...@solar.profs.unsw.edu.au | do the experiment only once." |
: +-------------------------------+------------------------------------+
: --
: +-------------------------------+------------------------------------+
: | Michael HART | "If you want a straight line take |
: | Dept of Professional Studies | only two points." |
: | University Of New South Wales | "If reproducibility is a problem |
And do try to get someone to explain how .sigs work
before you come in here again. Fucking idiot.
And what is a Department of Professional Studies anyway? Is
that like secretary school?
Mark.
Avoid normal situations.
a.t.j., et al.)?
Q: What are the "Toys R Us" franchises in black neighborhoods called?
A: We Be Toys.
--
alt.flame Special Forces: Carry on, and dread nought.
Mark
Actually it's not the joke it's the READING that does it.
Do your part and stamp out reading, start with yourself.
Not a student of yours.....
Herbert Rosmanith
: Come on people! Black is beautiful!!!
: Then again, nigger is not a color.
but "niger", from which "negroe" and thus "nigger" comes from, is
latin and means "black".
Lucien Lenoire
scumbags. To wit, or half of same prof. Hart. not pro.Phart.
Michael HART
In article <4dgn1i$n...@styx.uwa.edu.au>, anam...@uniwa.uwa.edu.au (Ravi Anamalay) writes:
|> Well, whoever posted that racist stuff - just remember :
|> (1) You feel inferior to blacks because your dick is under 6""
|> (2) Your sister & mother lost their virginity to blacks
|> (3) "" still prefer blacks
|> (4) You're girlfriend (or boyfriend) prefers blacks over you
Oh! I didn't know my girlfrient saw that black person over me. How kinky.
James Dominguez
Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
protect the unfunny.
---------------------====================---------------------
James Joseph Dominguez -=- Certifying Officer ASO1
Defence Science and Technology Organisation
Aeronautical and Maritime Research Laboratory
All of the opinions expressed in this posting are mine alone
unless of course I plagiarised them, in which case they are
probably not shared by my employer.
I think it is safer not to speculate.
---------------------====================---------------------
Donna
>From: James Dominguez <James.D...@dsto.defence.gov.au>
>Subject: Re: Abo Joke and Nigger Joke
>Date: 22 Jan 1996 02:09:21 GMT
>Here I go again...
> Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
>Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
>have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
>just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
>protect the unfunny.
Thought hard and this is the only one I couldcome up with (sorry)
Q. What was the swagman's name in "Waltzing Matilda"
A. Andy
Andy sang, Andy watched, Andy waited 'til his billy boiled . . .
Donna
evil Beavis
>
> In article <4dr4us$j...@alpha.sky.net>, ed...@sky.net wrote:
>
> > nob...@flame.alias.net (Anonymous) wrote:What are the three things you
> > can't give to "anonymous"?
> >
> > Intelligence
> >
> > a Conscience
> >
> > a LIFE!
>
> I want to hear the joke. I like racialist jokes.
>
> --
> ________________________________
> | Join the National Socialists |
> | Ensure the Prosperity of the |
> |________Aryan Race____________|
>
>
You are a joke - calling yourself Edward Van Halen...
eB
Te...@cps.co.nz
>
> Here I go again...
>
> Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
> Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
> have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
> just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
> protect the unfunny.
>
> Ok you asked for it, it's clean unfortunately.
A guy is driving through Queensland, hot summer's day, 40 degrees and his
car breaks down. Hasn't seen any other traffic all day so has walk to the
nearest town (luckily only about 50 miles). Anyway sun is beating down, he's
dying of thirst but staggering along anyway. A car approaches and the driver
stops and says good afternoon:
Guy: 'Please, please can you give me a lift?'
Driver: 'No sorry mate but I can sell you a tie.'
Guy: 'I don't need a tie, have you got any water?'
Driver: 'No I just sell ties, sure you don't want one?'
Anyway the guy doesn't want a tie so he staggers off down the road and
eventually arrives at the small town of Woolamongaratta. Desperate for a drink,
there's no pub but there is a Returned Serviceman's Association so he drags
himself up to the door but the doorman stops him and says:
'Sorry mate, can't come in here without a tie'.
martin felling
>nob...@flame.alias.net (Anonymous) wrote:What are the three things you
>can't give to "anonymous"?
>Intelligence
>a Conscience
>a LIFE!
Right on, Meg!
Mark Addinall
: > nob...@flame.alias.net (Anonymous) wrote:What are the three things you
: > can't give to "anonymous"?
: >
: > Intelligence
: >
: > a Conscience
: >
: > a LIFE!
: I want to hear the joke. I like racialist jokes.
That's 'racist' my dear little world leader.
: --
: ________________________________
: | Join the National Socialists |
: | Ensure the Prosperity of the |
: |________Aryan Race____________|
:
:
You are a fucking joke.
X-posts trimmed, I wish all these insignificant cunts
would stop giving us the gift of international mirth :-(
Retarded cunt.
Mark.
Keith Moore
qcmw...@kraken.itc.gu.edu.au (Donna ) wrote:
> In article <4durkh$9...@foxhound.dsto.gov.au> James Dominguez
<James.D...@dsto.defence.gov.au> writes:
> >From: James Dominguez <James.D...@dsto.defence.gov.au>
> >Subject: Re: Abo Joke and Nigger Joke
> >Date: 22 Jan 1996 02:09:21 GMT
>
> >Here I go again...
>
> > Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
> >Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
> >have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
> >just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
> >protect the unfunny.
>
> Thought hard and this is the only one I couldcome up with (sorry)
>
> Q. What was the swagman's name in "Waltzing Matilda"
>
> A. Andy
>
> Andy sang, Andy watched, Andy waited 'til his billy boiled . . .
>
> Donna
Donna,
How about this one;
There were two fencers and they had just finished a big fencing contract
for a station owner out the back of New South Wales. It had kept them
going for months out in the heat and the dust. They had just been paid
handsomely and were sitting in the shade of a big tree swatting the flies
and discussing what they would do next.
One says to the other "What are you going to do now we finished the job mate"
The other replied "I thought I might go to Sydney for a spell"
"Oh, mate that's a long way from here. What route will you take"
"Well I thought I might take the wife 'cause she did stand by me all
through the drought"
Keith.
Mark Addinall
: In article <4ds3vh$c...@grissom.powerup.com.au>, addi...@powerup.com.au (Mark Addinall) says:
See, what we have here is, either a retarded newbie, who can not
configure his mailer to (f)ollow-up correctly, or some smart-arse
sheep shagger who wants to change a thread intention (for some bizarre
reason).
: >
: >Michael HART (mh...@solar.csd.unsw.OZ.AU) wrote:
: >
: >: One must post some jikes anonymously else one can find oneself on trouble with the
: >: discriminatory anti-discrimination laws.
: >
This ^^^ is not me...
: >So fucking what.
That ^^^ was me.
: >
: >: Jokes about race (Aboriginal), sex (women) etc can be considered harassment and
: >: you can end up in court.
Again, not me...
: Look mate, fuck off. Your politically correct bullshit isn't appreciated around here,
: OK.
This dickhead.
: *****************************************************
: * *
: * proficiency at politics and electioneering *
: * *
: * is a sign of a misspent old age. *
: * *
: *****************************************************
Try harder you stupid cunt.
Mark.
Mr Gerhard M F R Kutt
: Here I go again...
: Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
: Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
: have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
: just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
: protect the unfunny.
1st Australian joke:
3 men at a party discussing their wives and what it takes to get out of
trouble with their wives.
1. English - I go out and buy my wife a Versace outfit costing a few
hundred quid and a bottle of her favourite perfume. I can do no wrong
for 2 weeks.
2. American - I buy my wife a Karl Lagerfeld outfit costing US$10,000
and jewelry from Cartier, and I can do no wrong for more than a month.
3. Australian - I buy my wife a slinky red dress for 10 bucks and a
dildo - that does the job for me.
Puzzled the other two men looked surprised and ask what the two have to
do with each other.
"Simple mate, if she don't like the dress - she can go fuck herself!"
-------
What is Australian Male Foreplay?
Sheila - are you awake?
What is Australian Women's Foreplay?
Is it hard?
-------
Gerhard
Mr Gerhard M F R Kutt
: This goes to you and all your other redneck friends. There's nothing
: worse than you little racist bigots out there who think that you rule the
: world. Chances are the person who wrote this so called " joke" is
: probably a lazy fat @ss who can't get a job himself !!
--
Hey "Ms. Flame" this is like er "tasteless jokes" - piss on you - might
cure your "flame."
Gerhard
Douglas Stalker
>In article <4durkh$9...@foxhound.dsto.gov.au> James Dominguez <James.D...@dsto.defence.gov.au> writes:
>>Here I go again...
>> Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
>>Australian joke?
>Thought hard and this is the only one I couldcome up with (sorry)
>Q. What was the swagman's name in "Waltzing Matilda"
I went through the entire Penguin Book of Aussie Jokes and the only
one I could find that was a real aussie joke as opposed to a generic
ethnic joke was the following:
Two men in a small country town shared a sizable lottery prize. When
asked what they would do with the money the first, a bussiness man,
replied that he would buy a car, take a trip around the world and then
set up a business.
The other, a farmer, said "I dunno. I think I'll just keep farming
untill it's all gone."
Billy Wheeler
Bruce & Blue are drivin' through the outback and they get to Alice
Springs (a little town). As they arrive at the gas station, Bruce
notices a new shop with a sign saying "Taxidermist". He asks Blue
"What the hell's a taxidermist?"
Blue says "I dunno - tell you what, I'll go fill up the Jeep, you go
ask the man about the shop."
Bruce wanders into the shop and a dapper little man comes out, says
"Can I help you?"
Bruce says "Yeah, I was just wonderin' what a taxidermist was."
The little bloke says "I stuff animals."
Bruce says "Oh."
The little bloke says "Yeah - for a livin'."
Bruce says "What kind of animals?"
Tlb says "Anything. Domestic animals, wild animals, the lot."
Bruce says "How about sheep?"
Tlb: "Yeah, hundreds."
B: "Cows, ever done cows?"
Tlb: "Oh, yeah, done a few of those."
B: "'Roos, ever stuffed a 'roo?"
Tlb: "One or two."
B: "How about an abo - you ever stuffed an abo?"
Tlb: "Nah - their skins are too tight."
So Bruce says "Well, thanks for your time mate - cheers."
Gets back in the jeep and Blue says "So, what's a taxidermist?"
"Ah, he's just a regular bloke like you or me!"
The gracious and admired moo...@darwin.ntu.edu.au (Keith Moore) spake
thusly:
--Donna,
--How about this one;
--There were two fencers and they had just finished a big fencing
contract
--for a station owner out the back of New South Wales. It had kept
them
--going for months out in the heat and the dust. They had just been
paid
--handsomely and were sitting in the shade of a big tree swatting the
flies
--and discussing what they would do next.
--One says to the other "What are you going to do now we finished the
job mate"
--The other replied "I thought I might go to Sydney for a spell"
--"Oh, mate that's a long way from here. What route will you take"
--"Well I thought I might take the wife 'cause she did stand by me all
--through the drought"
--Keith.
--
Cheers,
Billy
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
-- New, improved and shorter .sig!!
John Detombe
: Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
: Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
: have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
: just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
: protect the unfunny.
I did hear about that Australian experiment of crossbreeding kangaroos
and sheep in an effort to make woolen jumpers, is this true?
--
John Detombe (416) 751-4122
bn...@freenet.toronto.ca dutc...@idirect.com
Dean Licheri
Fuckin asshole. Your joke stinks, if I catch your ass , i'll fuck it then fry it.
Donna
>From: ger...@news.hk.super.net (Mr Gerhard M F R Kutt)
>Subject: Re: Abo Joke and Nigger Joke
>James Dominguez (James.D...@dsto.defence.gov.au) wrote:
>: Here I go again...
>: Please please please please please could somebody tell me a genuine
>: Australian joke? I really want to know at least one in my lifetime. I
>: have requested such a thing before, and all the replies I get are usually
>: just New Zealander / Irishman / Blonde jokes with the names changed to
>: protect the unfunny.
This one is best told with the appropriate accents.
An Italian man, a French man and an Australian man were in a bar and boasting
about their sexual prowess.
The Italian man said "When I make love to my woman, I lightly tickle her all
over with a feather, and she rises one foot off the bed".
The French man said "When I make love to a woman, I cover her with cream and
when I lick it off, she rises three feet above the bed"
The Australian man says: "That's nuthin. When I make love to me missus, I
wipe me dick on the curtains and she hits the fuckin' roof"
Gary Gambino Sr.
> Date: Thu, 25 JAN 1996 03:36:22 GMT
> From: -Lurch- <bria...@a.crl.com>
> Newgroups: alt.tasteless.jokes
> Subject: Re: Abo Joke and Nigger Joke
>
> The gracious words of rpa...@nwlink.com were:
>
> >>>WDH...@prodigy.com (Brenda Hall) wrote:
>
> >>>>This goes to you and all your other redneck friends. There's nothing
> >>>>worse than you little racist bigots out there who think that you rule the
> >>>>world. Chances are the person who wrote this so called " joke" is
> >>>>probably a lazy fat @ss who can't get a job himself !!
>
> >>>Well smell her! Ms. Uppity Bitch!
> >>>Bitch- can you say "tasteless"? good.. now go look it up!
>
> What do you expect from an AOL wannabe?
>>
...with chronic PMS who hasn't had any in a long time...
> ========================================
> | Thou mayst obtain mine attention at: |
> | home: bria...@a.crl.com |
> | work: cat...@penril.com |
> | My webserver: http://www.penril.com |
> ========================================
>
>
>
Gary Gambino Sr.
gdga...@homer.louisville.edu
Tom Osborn
>One must post some jikes anonymously else one can find oneself on trouble with the
>discriminatory anti-discrimination laws.
>Jokes about race (Aboriginal), sex (women) etc can be considered harassment and
>you can end up in court.
>It doesn't matter that it is a 'jokes' forum.
>One shouldn't have to be a 'brave warrior' to post a joke but the fact is one does
>have to be.
>In article <4dg817$k...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>, fres...@aol.com (Fresh816) writes:
>|> What a brave warrior you are, posting racist jokes anonymously.
>|>
>|> God, I admire you.
>|>
>|> A. Mathis
By "brave warrior", I presume these people mean 'bellicose prick'.
Tom Osborn - who acknowledges that people who 'stir possum' *almost*
*always* have a hidden agenda (and a really fucked up psyche).
Aston Webb 1 Cluster
>
>
>Fuckin asshole. Your joke stinks, if I catch your ass , i'll fuck it then fry it.
>
Edward Van Halen
>
> By "brave warrior", I presume these people mean 'bellicose prick'.
>
> Tom Osborn - who acknowledges that people who 'stir possum' *almost*
> *always* have a hidden agenda (and a really fucked up psyche).
--