City Morgue:
You stab 'em, we slab 'em.
You kill 'em, we chill 'em.
You snuff 'em, we stuff 'em.
Here's one a friend of mine a few years back came up with...
"Hello, Sherwood forest...Maid Marion speaking"
..howz 'bout: 'hello mabels whorehouse, where
the customer always comes first'.........................
> What would be some good answers to say on the phone?
> I'll start it off... "Hello, city morgue..."
> Tell me some good ones!
.. you stiff 'em we stuff 'em -
do a search on the subject, the thread was recently sucked dry
..
--
the BAT ~..~
I read this on somebody's sig file a while back,
Incontenance hot line, could you please hold!
FLETCH
--
Note: to reply by e-mail, remove " .nospam " from my
address. FLETCH
Thank you for calling the alzeheimer's research uumm, uhhh
"Joe's Whorehouse, where the customer comes first"
And for the Star Trek fans....
Enterprise... Kirk here
Hello, I'd like to order a pepperoni pizza please.
(this blows people's minds)
Hello, Netherhells day care center, you breed 'em, we lead 'em.
Hi, Lisi and Tara's Amputation clinic and bakery. We have a special
today on ladyfingers.
Angel
Hello, wrong number!
Hello, Vulcan Central Command!
Hello, Altar of Sin!
Hello, House of Satan, Lucifer speaking!
Speak!
and my own,
Hello, House of Evil!
It gets interesting when people's parents call :)
---
jOANNE wOJTYSIAK joa...@cs.ualberta.ca
nECROMANCER
You don't take LSD to expand your consciousness.
You take it to turn your toaster into a home entertainment centre.
Richard Sparrow <rspa...@ipa.net> wrote in article
<346223...@ipa.net>...
> carman ryan elijah wrote:
> >
> > Trajectory Sperm Bank, you squirt 'em we insert 'em.
> >
> > On Mon, 3 Nov 1997, Anarchy wrote:<snip>
Or "Wolf's Abortion Clinic. YOu rape 'em, we scrape 'em. No fetus can beat us!"
or "House of Lords; God speaking..."
In French (but you might get it):
answer the phone saying: "- Sardine !"
caller: "Allo ???"
"Mais non, à l'huile..."
OK, not really tasteless...
---------------------------------
Guillaume "Kill Your TV" Dargaud
http://sung3.ifsi.rm.cnr.it/~dargaud/Humor/QuotesSexual.html#Sex
"The pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous and the expense
damnable." — Earl of Chesterfield about sex
> Hello city pound...you tag them or we snag them...
>
> Hello Jakes Bird Santuary...they tweet or their meat...
>
>
> On Thu, 6 Nov 1997, Richard Sparrow wrote:
>
"Suicide hotline - hold please..."
--
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[Devo] Remembers F.o.C. on 8-Track!
[G.W.] REVEL IN THE DIVINE RADIANT GLORY !!!
[Gary] CdB...@Worldnet.ATT.Net
http://home.att.net/~cdbd3rd/home.html
>What would be some good answers to say on the phone?
>I'll start it off... "Hello, city morgue..."
>Tell me some good ones.
Instead of saying hello ask for a person. Usually the person calling me will
tell me that i have a wrong number and then hang up. A few minutes later they
call back rather annoyed with me. You can have so much fun with peoples heads.
It's lotsa fun.
Jeff
Answer the phone in your best "Phony FM DJ Voice" and say "Congratulations,
you're our 10th caller! Now for $1000 tell me who plays the best rock in <your
city> ?!" If they even attempt to guess an answer, tell them they're wrong and
hang up on them.
--
Joe's Whorehouse, where it's a business to do pleasure
with you.
Gernot Lachner <glac...@iafrica.com> wrote in article
<N.110397....@196-31-20-161.iafrica.com>...
>
> > What would be some good answers to say on the phone?
> > I'll start it off... "Hello, city morgue..."
> > Tell me some good ones!
>
> .. you stiff 'em we stuff 'em -
>
>
... you stab'em we slab 'em
or "Hello, City Crematorium, you kill 'em we grill 'em"
Pedro
Anarchy <hipl...@alphalink.com.au> wrote:
>What would be some good answers to say on the phone?
>I'll start it off... "Hello, city morgue..."
>Tell me some good ones!
NOSPAMming in effect in email address.
Wanna send me something, don't use SPAM
Come and check out the I Don't Know Lounge at
www.geocities.com/NapaValley/6899/idkbar.html
(or just immitate your answering machine, then say "beeeeeep", and wait).
"Steven's Mortuary.... You stab em' we slab em'"
a.j.
Kelly's woodyard...........
want a root?
I always liked:
County Abortion Clinic...you rape 'em, we scrape 'em.
liana
> > >What would be some good answers to say on the phone?
> > >I'll start it off... "Hello, city morgue..."
> > >Tell me some good ones.
>
> Answer the phone in your best "Phony FM DJ Voice" and say "Congratulations,
> you're our 10th caller! Now for $1000 tell me who plays the best rock in <your
> city> ?!" If they even attempt to guess an answer, tell them they're wrong and
> hang up on them.
>
Crisis Center...please hold!...your call is important to us,
please continue to hold...etc
Fartman
When the phone rings. pick it up but wait for the other party to speak
first. Not only is it a good way to deal with unwanted callers, but it's
interesting the reactions you get.
David
you stab 'em, we slab 'em
you slice 'em, we ice 'em
you kill 'em, we chill 'em
you burn 'em, we urn 'em
you whack 'em, we pack 'em
... what can we do for you today?
phoenix
Unleash the DOGS to respond to email
PHOENIX wrote in message <346A86AC...@earthlink.net>...
Joe Bob's Movers
You Call We Haul
If We can't Truck it
Fuck it.