Recycled: Don't mess with the Guinness

[Douglas D. Anderson]

A bloke goes into a pub, and the barmaid asks what he wants.
'I want to bury my face in your cleavage and lick the sweat from
between
your tits' he says.
'You dirty git' shouts the barmaid 'get out before I get my husband.'
The bloke apologises and promises not to repeat his gaffe.
The barmaid accepts this and asks him again what he wants.
'I want to pull your pants down, spread yoghurt between the cheeks of
your
arse and lick it all off' he says.
'You dirty filthy pervert. You're banned. Get out!!' she storms.
Again, the bloke apologises and swears never ever to do it again.
'One more chance' says the barmaid. 'Now - what do you want?'
'I want to turn you upside down, open your flaps and fill your pussy
with
Guinness, and then drink every last drop from the hairy cup'
The barmaid is furious at this personal intrusion, and runs upstairs
to
fetch her husband, who's sitting quietly watching the telly.
What's up love?' he asks
There's a bloke in the bar who wants to put his head between my tits
and
lick the sweat off' she says.
I'll kill him. Where is he?' storms the husband.
'Then he said he wanted to pour yoghurt down between my arse cheeks
and lick
it off' she screams.
'Right. He's dead' says the husband, reaching for a cricket bat.
'Then he said he wanted to turn me upside down, fill my fanny with
Guinness
and then drink it all' she cries.
The husband puts down his bat and returns to his armchair, and
switches the
telly back on.
'Aren't you going to do something about it?' she cries hysterically
'Look love. I'm not messing with someone who can drink 15 pints of
Guinness...'


"We choose truth over facts" - Joe Biden