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[Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]

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Douglas D.. Anderson

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Feb 28, 2019, 11:44:45 PM2/28/19
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[Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]
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Version 10.0

Posting Frequency: Every Week, more or less.
Last-modified: September 2, 2018
Maintained by Douglas D. Anderson (douganderson1981.gmail.com)
Formerly by Raymond Jensen (r...@andrew.spam.me.not.cmu.edu)
and before that by Jeroen van Kessel (jvke...@knoware.NOSPAM.nl,
and before that, Dave Pease (dpe...@c-prompt-sd.com)
HTML by Steven Willoughby (ora...@synapse.net)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Introduction

Greetings and welcome to what used to be the funniest place on the
Internet. Unfortunately, through lack of proper use atj is not what it
used to be.

Please read this FAQ if you are a newcomer to the group or if you
think it's okay to flame (racists, England, Minnesota, USA, Hillary
Clinton, Colin Kaepernick, etc.) without writing a joke.

If you don't feel like reading this entire FAQ, please remember the
following 2 rules:

*** DON'T POST TO THE NEWSGROUP WITHOUT INCLUDING A JOKE ***
*** DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU ***

As long as you always abide by this, and others do the same, this
newsgroup will be a much more rewarding endeavor for everyone.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

2. Table of Contents

1. Introduction

2. Table of Contents

3. Safe Use of atj - a note for newbies

4. Frequently Asked Questions

5. Other resources

6. Conclusion

7. objoke

8. Take me to the alt.tasteless.jokes newsgroup

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3. Safe Use of atj - a note for newbies

So you are a new participant in this newsgroup, eh? Well, I hope you
have your asbestos suit handy--because, regardless of what folks say,
atj is a mine field for new members. The people who read this group
are not very patient with silly mistakes, and are not very restrained
in going about flaming them. This place is not for the weak of
spirit...

That being said, if you go over this FAQ carefully, your chances of
posting unburned will be significantly higher. And just remember: if
there's one thing this newsgroup needs, it's new blood, newbies with
new jokes. So, regardless of the result, if you are posting new
material to atj, your work will be appreciated by the (probably
silent) majority.

Good luck.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

4. Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Hi. I don't want to read this whole long FAQ. Got any quick advice
for me?

A: Yes. Don't post anything to this newsgroup without including a
tasteless joke along with it. That's the most important thing I can
tell you.

Q: What is a joke?

A: The word "joke" comes from "yoke", to "join together". A "joke" is
like a koan, joining together two or more thoughts or concepts which
are held to be serious and even sacred, but which are irreconcilable.
For example-

"What would Jesus do?" + "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?"
= "What would Jesus do for a Klondike Bar?"

"Government" + "Intelligence"
= "Government Intelligence"

Some jokes are more complex, such as "Bungee Jumping in Mexico"
and "Death by Rooroo", and "The parable of the wedding guest", but
similarly conjoin irreconcilable concepts.

Q: I see the description of this newsgroup is "sometimes disgusting
rather than tasteless or funny." Does that mean it's proper to post
stuff that is just plain disgusting, even if it's not funny?

A: No. The description was written that way because too many folks
post useless junk instead of tasteless jokes. If everyone posted
appropriate material to this newsgroup, that description would no
longer apply. Let's all work towards this end. Please post only
tasteless jokes here. If you want to become proficient at this, study
the work of such masters of tasteless jokes as Bob Tulk and Blanche
Knott.

Q: Hi, I'm not interested in what this group's about, I'm just testing
my news gateway here, sorry about that, only be a minute-

A: There are places for testing your net connection. This is not one
of them. Neither is any other newsgroup not named alt.test or
something like it. Please take your tests there. Otherwise be prepared
to get flamed.

Q: Hey, I found this *great* book entitled "How to Win Friends and
Influence People" written by this visionary named Dale Carnegie that
I'd like to show to all you guys-

A: Please don't. You won't make any friends here like that.

Q: I like humor, but I don't want to be offended.
Is alt.tasteless.jokes for me?

A: No. Why don't you go to rec.humor.funny (a moderated newsgroup
guaranteed to be inoffensive) or rec.funny (which is probably a safer
bet for the thin-skinned)?

Q: I saw a joke that I liked, and I have a somewhat related joke that
I would like to post under the same thread. How should I go about
doing this?

A: Just go about your business using common sense. If it was a long
story joke that you read, and you want to post a joke relating to it,
you probably do not need to copy the whole joke into your reply.
This is especially inappropriate if you post a one-liner after a five
paragraph story joke. This wastes time, and is generally a good way
to get yourself flamed.

Q: I saw a joke that I liked. I'd like to tell the poster so. What is
the accepted way of doing this?

A: It's always better to do these things via email. Unfortunately
nobody uses real email addresses because of spambots.

Q: I saw a joke that just was not funny. It bothered me because it
made reference to (Hitler, Jews, whites, blacks, homosexuals, etc.)
in a disparaging manner. What can I do about this?

A: Good question. A general rule of thumb in this situation is that no
one cares what you think. If you post to the net with a flame of this
joke, you waste bandwidth and all you are doing is pissing other
people off. If a joke is not funny, just let it die in peace. If you
have a good sense of humor, and have correctly gauged the joke's
value, it will disappear quickly. If not, you, and not the poster, may
be the problem. In this group there is no such thing as political
correctness, and nothing is "taboo", nothing is sacred - "freedom of
speech" is the rule, and if your joke includes terms such as "kikes",
"wops", "niggers", "crackers", "spics" or "fudge-packers", no one is
going to care as long as you are posting a joke and not some
intentionally threatening or inflammatory diatribe.

Q: That's not good enough. I want to let this person know that I do
not appreciate the joke and possibly shame him/her into refraining
from posting in the future. What do I do now?

A: It's always good to have such dedication on this group - keeps us
strong. If you feel the need to flame the poster of this joke, by all
means do it. Hey, it's a free world, right?

Q: It's not possible. I want to tell the world what I think. I'm
posting on the net and if you don't like it then screw off, okay?

A: I was afraid it would get to this point. If you need to post a
flame for everyone to see and appreciate (and I have seen some
flames that qualify as being material that I appreciate) then post a
joke with it. That's what the 'objoke' means on all of these posts
around here. Were this newsgroup used correctly there would be at
least one joke in every post. So if you've got a complaint that you
want the world to hear, include a joke that you want the world to hear
and you will be more appreciated.

Q: Okay, how about this (Mel, Lik_My_Sak, et. al.) guy? He really
pisses me off every time he posts - and he posts a lot. How do I get
him to stop? Flame every one of his posts?

A: It's called a killfile. Look into it.

Q: I saw a joke that was very insensitive to the struggles of (insert
minority here). Isn't that illegal?

A: Look. Can you read the name of this group? Here, let me help you -
alt.tasteless.jokes. When you read a joke about blacks, or Chicanos,
or mathematicians, what you are reading is the epitome of
tastelessness, i.e. judging a group of people based on stereotypes. My
advice to you would be deal with it. I guarantee that for every one of
you who is offended, a bunch of tasteless people found the joke very
funny. So shut yer yap. Remember who you are dealing with here: not
alt.sensitivity, alt.save.the.earth, alt.save.the.whales., or
alt.inner.child. The people who post here are often crude, obnoxious
and un presentable in public. Hence the term tasteless in the
newsgroup title. If you are offended by a joke then perhaps you are in
the wrong place.

And no, it's not illegal to post such a joke.

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5. Other resources

A. Humor newsgroups

* alt.humor.best-of-usenet - The funniest posts from all over the
usenet.
* alt.humor.puns - If you find such things funny...
* rec.humor.funny - A moderated newsgroup. Tame.
* rec.humor - Less caustic than atj.
* talk.bizarre - Funny-peculiar stuff.
* alt.change.lightbulb - pretty self explanatory.

B. Tasteless newsgroups

* alt.tasteless - The drainage culvert below the information
superhighway.
* alt.tasteless.penis - I haven't got a clue and I probably am
better
off that way...
* alt.binaries.pictures.grotesque - Stomach-turning binary posts.

C. Flame newsgroups

* alt.flame - If you'd like to generically piss someone off for no
good
reason, atj is *not* the best place to do it. In alt.flame, they
like
this type of thing. Get off on it or something. Whatever. In any
case,
please post your basic flames here, and not in atj.
* alt.nuke.europe - If you've got a problem with England, this is a
*great* place to check out.
* alt.nuke.the.USA - If you've got a problem with the United
States,
this is a *great* place to check out.

D. Web sites

See the Humor HOTList for other WWW sites.

E. Ghosts to watch out for- if you see new posts from any of these
folks, contact the Ghost Adventures crew immediately-

G - P (aka Girdle Popper), Mr. FBI (aka Mr Funnybone International),
+Wayne, Spitfire, Jule§, Gernot Lachner (aka vampeleon, RIP),
CheechWizard, Blob, OverMuch, Loz, Omar the Camel Humper,
Tropigal, Mi MM ke, Lancome_Girl, Ærchie, ur_droll, Lik Mai Sak,
Leigh, RamSys, Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy), MadMax, Keith E.,
Mel (aka Richard Catto)

F. Keys to the Kingdom:

Terms and abbreviations commonly used in this and other newsgroups:

http://www.harley.com/usenet/usenet-tutorial/

http://mugsy.org/asa_faq/glossary/usenet.shtml

In addition, you may find other abbreviations not so well documented,
such as

ESOD - "Eat shit and die."
ESOL - "Eat shit and live",

etc., which might be best learned by searching the Google Groups
archive. Beware asking regular users, this is like asking a passing
stranger in The Bronx, NY, for directions.

Good advice: when adding to a thread, always post to the bottom, and
avoid leaving a lot of headers on top, unless you intend to be
annoying.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

6. Conclusion

If you want to flame me (or anyone) in the newsgroup please include
an objoke when you do so. Additional suggestion- avoid posting
binaries
here, and avoid crossposting to non-humor groups if at all possible.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

7. objoke

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If you do an operation on a group - such as reading an article,
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Since you have read this dummy article, leafnode will retrieve
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the next time. If you'll look into this group a little later, you
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If you see articles in groups you do not read, that is almost
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If you do not understand this, please talk to your newsmaster.

Leafnode can be found at
http://www.leafnode.org/


8. Take me to the alt.tasteless.jokes newsgroup

gonzo

unread,
Mar 7, 2019, 7:20:47 PM3/7/19
to


"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
news:dvdh7e52dvdhmrogj...@4ax.com...

Nice to see you are still alive, Doug.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Mar 12, 2019, 6:43:17 PM3/12/19
to
On Fri, 8 Mar 2019 00:20:44 -0000, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
wrote:

>
>
>"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
>news:dvdh7e52dvdhmrogj...@4ax.com...
>
>Nice to see you are still alive, Doug.

Likewise gonzo! It would be great if we could renew interest in
usenet, it's still a platform where you can say what's on your mind
without geetting lambasted by the thought police. At least so far the
thought police and PC cops are too stupid to even know what usenet is,
let alone figure out how to ban anyone. heh.

gonzo

unread,
Mar 22, 2019, 12:23:16 AM3/22/19
to


"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
news:3adg8e9asbkdpjrj8...@4ax.com...
Christ, the world is a crazy place these days. It's like I went to sleep,
and woke up in bizarro world.
People being threatened by the cops for mis-gendering some fucking nutcase,
people making
insane amounts of money for showing shit on Youtube, America turned into an
open air asylum,
Europe flooded with knuckle -dragging useless eaters from Crapistan or
wherever.

Most young people have no idea Usenet even exists, alas, but as you say, the
thought police
don't know we are here thinking politically incorrect stuff. I hope it stays
that way.

Omega

unread,
Mar 22, 2019, 3:21:34 AM3/22/19
to
I can tell you, the thought police no less virile this side of the pond,
total fucking idiots who have completely forgotten their role to protect
us all and catch real criminals not the soft options they pick on to
make their shift go by.

Fuck me, you can't even say jew or muslim in a light sense and don't
ever say nigger or you're the wrong end of a prosecution, before you can
say yea but!

I remember you both from a decade and more ago, Doug always telling his
lame jokes but soon discovered his formidable intellect if locking horns
with some of the others I recall.

Not sure if you have heard this one: The Tourettes Olympics, on you
marks, get set, fuck off! Doug always insisted we leave a joke, doing
me best.

Say hello to Donald trump. I love the guy.

omega






gonzo

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Mar 22, 2019, 10:59:10 PM3/22/19
to


"Omega" wrote in message news:q722ds$8fq$1...@dont-email.me...
I would like to see the faces of the present-day snowflakes reading the
stuff
posted here 15 years ago, it would have them running to their safe rooms.
I read a depressing article about Portland State, where cracking just about
any kind
of joke gets you reported to the "Bias Response Team" who will rip you a new
one.
Fuck, what happened to people? Dreary humourless cunts. America had some of
the
best comedy around on TV years ago, now it would have all the chat show
hosts choking
on their latte. I'm 69 now (insert tasteless joke here) and I'm all out of
fucks to give about
all this PC shit, if I had to listen to some fuckwit screaming because
he/she/it was referred to
by the wrong pronoun I would lose my shit and kick the fucker. I could
always plead dementia
in court.

Just to keep Doug happy:

Said a randy young man from Berlin,
While filling his girlfriend with gin,
"Have you got your maidenhead?"
"You must be joking" she said,
"But I still have the box it came in!"





Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Mar 25, 2019, 9:05:58 PM3/25/19
to
On Sat, 23 Mar 2019 02:59:07 -0000, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
wrote:
I'm 68 myself, so not far behind you age-wise, and thinking of
entertainment and media years ago, Jack Nicholson in "One Flew Over
The Cukoo's Nest" as the middle-aged pervert who can't seem to
understand what's wrong with hitting on good looking and sexually ripe
underage women... (of course that doen't quite reach the level of the
all-time Nicholson classic "Diner scene" in "Five Easy Pieces")...
even what at the time seemd like mild humor like the Carol Burnett and
Harvey Korman skit with a gay vampire referred to as a "hemosexual"
would be cause for prosecution today.

gonzo

unread,
Mar 26, 2019, 12:13:14 AM3/26/19
to


"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
news:atti9e1re2tg7civg...@4ax.com...
I remember "Married With Children", Al Bundy's jokes would have today's
Social Justice Wankers pass out from sheer rage. Still, I remember back in
the sixties,
the British BBC had "The Black and White Minstrel Show" (Holy Fuck, , I just
checked on
YouTube, it ran until 1978! ) It was hugely popular, such a show now would
be unthinkable.
The world has moved on, things are now weird and scary, as Grandpa Simpson
said "It'll happen to you!"

Formatting looks shitty, what the fuck is wrong with this program...........

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Mar 29, 2019, 1:22:55 PM3/29/19
to
On Tue, 26 Mar 2019 04:13:07 -0000, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
In the early 70's I listed to the arly Firesign Theater albums (for
young people who don't know what the word "album" means, they were 12
inch diameter flat black plastic disks used to record sound before
miccro-SD was invented) so much a lot of the material is still stuck
in my head, like

(describing what is America:)

"It's kikes and wops and niggers and spics,
With noses as big as your arm,
It's girls with pimples and criplies with dimples
And honkeys who never left the farm!...."


gonzo

unread,
Apr 1, 2019, 11:34:56 PM4/1/19
to


"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
news:eoks9e9oeg8nut1nh...@4ax.com...
You forgot us Micks........
Speaking of old tech, I recently revived an old valve (tube to you, sonny!)
radio from around 1955. Works ok now, but there are no AM stations left
around here. So it sounds great, but only if you like static.......I can
cheat by
playing my phone's radio through it. Mystifying technology to young people
now, though. As far as albums are concerned, record players are now back in
vogue, you can now buy the damned things here, bloody hipsters. Now they
are talking about reviving the cassette player, fuck that, they were shitty
when they were in use years ago.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Apr 6, 2019, 9:32:05 PM4/6/19
to
On Tue, 2 Apr 2019 04:34:54 +0100, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
Although "valve" is probably more appropriate than "vacuum tube",
Fleming's original "valve" was just a diode, and a few years later
when Lee De Forest (no clear relation to Gump) discovered the triode
which really is analogous to a "valve" it wound up being called a
"vacuum tube" probably in remembrance of the much earlier "Crookes
Tube"... so I suppose one term is as good as the other.

btw- I modified a late-phonograph-history Fisher multi-pole direct
drive turntable to run between 70-90 RPM, and using a heavy tracking
"DJ cartridge" I occasionally play around with old "78's" It'll do
both "Victrola" and "Edison" type records by using a relay to reverse
the phase of one side of a stereo cartridge. Victrolas tracked
side-to-side while Edisons tracked up-and-down (like a roller
coaster). To maintain comparability with old mono discs, the
engineering geniuses discovered that by running stereo tracks 90
degrees apart and 45 degrees to normal both could be played on the
same record player... unfortunately because Edison records track up
and down the two "sort-of" side to side stereo tracks are out of phase
and cancel out. So flip one side of the cartridge and now both
channels are in phase and "sort-of" up-and-down. I like the pre-swing
"roaring 20's" jazz, which evolved more or less into the "San
Francisco" style of older "modern bands" like Turk Murphy and Lu
Watters.

Basically I can appreciate our ancestors across the pond resurrecting
"valve" amplifiers. And you're right about radios, all radios if fact.
I've got an old Hammerlund "short wave" which sits these many years
collecting dust, When I was young I used to enjoy listening to foreign
English language broadcasts.. all history now. The electric bills to
put out tens of thousands of watts of RF were phenomenal, and now the
Internet has shut down all but a few jungle stations and some Porto
Ricans who use CB instead of international telephone.

Thinking of Micks, I get a chuckle contemplating how my Dad's mother
was descended from American patriots who fought the British in the
American revolution, fought in the Civil War on the side of the North,
etc... and my Dad's father was descended from Irish and Scottish
Loyalists who fought on the British side against the Americans,
settled on Canadian land grants after fleeing, and fought the
Americans in the War of 1812... Somehow that family emigrated to the
US in 1884 and settled in Nebraska at the same time his mother's
family of pioneers settled in Nebraska. My Mother's family was half
Irish Harmons and half Norwegian Haydens, who somehow all came
together in Omaha, Nebraska, with my half patriot half loyalist Dad,
and brought me and my culturally and genetically screwed up siblings
into the world. Then we moved to Chicago where I did most of my
growing up years. So when I hear American nigs talking about how their
problems are cause by white people and white people owe them, all I
can do is think "shut the fuck up you fucking spear chucking
miscreants, you think you have identity problems and past karma
issues? I support your 2nd Amendment right to shoot each other, so get
with it, and while you're at it, take Al Sharpton and Louis Farakhan
to a fentanyl party why don't you."

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Apr 6, 2019, 9:36:18 PM4/6/19
to
On Wed, 03 Apr 2019 14:19:57 -0400, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

>On Tue, 2 Apr 2019 04:34:54 +0100, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
>wrote:
>
>>now, though. As far as albums are concerned, record players are now back in
>>vogue, you can now buy the damned things here, bloody hipsters. Now they
>>are talking about reviving the cassette player, fuck that, they were shitty
>>when they were in use years ago.
>
>I'd cheer the public hanging of the inventor of 8 tracks. By his
>balls. Until they tore off.

I just had a vision of a loud "ca-chunk" halfway through your post and
a brief anxious pause before it continued.. On the other hand you
didn't have to pull the player out of the dashboard every couple of
months to unwind a couple of miles of magnetic tape wound up on sme
wheel or capstan like with cassettes.

gonzo

unread,
Apr 11, 2019, 11:09:12 PM4/11/19
to


"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
news:hghiae5j60b6avn49...@4ax.com...
One of the reasons for the lack of Medium and Shortwave stations now is that
they no longer make
the huge transmitter valves needed. I think the BBC in England bought up the
existing supplies, when
they wear out, that's it. Just short range FM left. The radios though, works
of art in the fifties and sixties.
Polished wooden cabinets, mellow sound, solid engineering. Now, plastic
crap, boring as fuck.

Well, you certainly have a colourful family history.
Ha, aren't the Dems going to make all the whiteys cough up? With pricks like
Beto around,
who promised to sign you all up to reparations in a heartbeat, if he has the
chance. It would all
go so smoothly as well. "Yo ,Whitey! Gimme yo fuckin' money!" and every
white American would
hand it over. Fuckers are living in Cloud Cuckoo Land.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Apr 14, 2019, 9:50:52 PM4/14/19
to
On Fri, 12 Apr 2019 04:09:12 +0100, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
Before I retired there was a black guy in my department who laughed
about the situation here- pointing out that America is still about 75%
white Christians, (you'd never gues that living in a major city, most
of the black population has moved into the cities) he said basically
guess who elected Obama, obviously black Americans who are about 12%
of the population didn't, it was white liberals with a guilt problem.

Latest stupid move in New York State- the legislature voted into law a
huge chunk of money to give free college to illegal aliens at the same
session they killed a bill to give education money to the survivors of
war fighters who died in battle. The plan is to get a whole population
of new people to vote for Democrats, when the morons don't realize it
would be like the Romans hoping the barbarians would help support the
empire.

gonzo

unread,
Apr 24, 2019, 9:35:36 PM4/24/19
to


"Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
news:v8o7be5hdg6g4rdlm...@4ax.com...
But surely this will work for the Dems? If you give all these freebies to
a bunch of people, won't they all vote for you in the hope of getting more
freebies? They might still hate you, but free stuff is free stuff.
Interesting
times for America, the next elections will see some crazy shit happening.
I mean, even crazier stuff than what is going on now.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Apr 26, 2019, 7:08:39 AM4/26/19
to
On Thu, 25 Apr 2019 02:35:35 +0100, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
As wiser men than the Dems have on their side have pointed out, the
people they are inviting in by hoardes are violent anarchists who
obviously won't vote for Democrats or anyone else for that matter...
if they're throwing rocks and killing police to get across the boarder
they'll be throwing rocks and killing police after they get here-
"times change but people don't".

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 13, 2019, 9:48:07 AM6/13/19
to
On 2/28/2019 9:44 PM, Douglas D.. Anderson wrote:

> [Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]
> ------------------------------------------------
>
> Version 10.0

<clip>

seems new folk are all coming in via G-groups

..might I suggest some sort of Usenet set-up instructional be included
in the FAQ

my 2¢

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 13, 2019, 9:48:19 AM6/13/19
to
..he's attempting froup CPR

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 13, 2019, 9:49:50 AM6/13/19
to
it's getting people to go through the motions of setting up a reader,
hosting (free or not), etc.., that I think people in general, especially
Millennials, wouldn't even begin to consider because it involves a bit
of a thinking process

that, and if you've lurked a few other groups lately, seems each has
developed their own language

it _is_ the last bastion of free speech

I actually tried luring some people here from a forum I would post at
regularly had they not banned every ISP I'd float in with

guess they didn't appreciate my calling them out as worthless cowardly
faggots hiding behind equally-as-cowardice mods


Ṃᴆ

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Jun 13, 2019, 9:50:51 AM6/13/19
to
On 3/22/2019 1:21 AM, Omega wrote:

> Say hello to Donald trump. I love the guy.
>
> omega

Trump support is simply a given these days. Anyone who can't see the
sheer volume of work he's put into getting everything blocked by
Congress or the United States Courts for the Ninth Circuit is beyond
despicable

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 13, 2019, 9:51:25 AM6/13/19
to
On 3/21/2019 10:23 PM, gonzo wrote:
>
>
> "Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
> news:3adg8e9asbkdpjrj8...@4ax.com...
>
> On Fri, 8 Mar 2019 00:20:44 -0000, "gonzo" <gonzot...@hohum.net>
> wrote:
>
>>
>>
>> "Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
>> news:dvdh7e52dvdhmrogj...@4ax.com...
>>
>> Nice to see you are still alive, Doug.
>
> Likewise gonzo! It would be great if we could renew interest in
> usenet, it's still a platform where you can say what's on your mind
> without geetting lambasted by the thought police. At least so far
> the thought police and PC cops are too stupid to even know what
> usenet is, let alone figure out how to ban anyone. heh.
>
>
> Christ, the world is a crazy place these days. It's like I went to
> sleep, and woke up in bizarro world. People being threatened by the
> cops for mis-gendering some fucking nutcase, people making insane
> amounts of money for showing shit on Youtube, America turned into an
> open air asylum, Europe flooded with knuckle -dragging useless eaters
> from Crapistan or wherever.
>
> Most young people have no idea Usenet even exists, alas, but as you
> say, the thought police don't know we are here thinking politically
> incorrect stuff. I hope it stays that way.

I think usenet would've been compromised decades ago if they were going
to do anything. These days, it's like a stretch of desert that anyone
can roam but most find too difficult to even get started. People these
days may also be getting afraid of free speech because they can't even
fathom something as being completely unmoderated -- where would they go
to complain?

Ṃᴆ

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Jun 13, 2019, 9:52:13 AM6/13/19
to
On 3/25/2019 10:13 PM, gonzo wrote:

> "Douglas D.. Anderson" wrote in message
Democrats insist Trump is like a modern-day Archie Bunker, but Trump
couldn't hold a candle to Archie's political incorrectness

They need to bring back blackface comedy in the cartoons, the
Jeffersons, the original unedited "Roots" series, and all the shit that
paints blacks as the niggers they really are. Whole cities are uprooted
and destroyed by niggers, not whitey. They do as much or more damage
than those greasy spic fuckstains and their cartel leaders.

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 14, 2019, 4:16:44 AM6/14/19
to
exactly.. the wheelchair-bound were trolls, "little people" were midgets
or dwarfs, the HIV-infected were freaks wholly rejected by society
(along with albinos, japs/chincs, retards, bums, hobos, trannies --
complete outcasts -- and of course liberals, jews and their camel-raping
counterparts).

Ṃᴆ

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Jun 14, 2019, 4:17:31 AM6/14/19
to
On 4/3/2019 12:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:
> I'd cheer the public hanging of the inventor of 8 tracks. By his
> balls. Until they tore off.

experienced those VR (virtual reality) goggles a few months ago -- some
basketball footage -- and if they're going to use that for pr0n along
with those silicon fuck dolls.. there ain't gonna be anymore night
clubs, strip joints, escorts, massage parlors, or adult-anything that's
even remotely marketable

I don't think Mel realized how cutting-edge his lifestyle really was

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 14, 2019, 4:23:46 AM6/14/19
to
do you balance all that retro stuff with modern-day electronics?

I still use a flip cell with zero data. Having unlimited text and long
distance for $25/mo is all I need.

I remember getting dad torqued when I was in college and charged all my
calls to my girlfriend back home to the company he worked for, he found
out through his secretary and I had to cough up over $300 for what today
would've cost $50 (2 months of unlimited ld)

..the point being, niggers can't handle unlimited ld, don't deserve
modern electronics, and with the universal track record, need to
collectively be harvesting blueberries or cotton, period

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 15, 2019, 4:07:10 PM6/15/19
to
On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Thu, 13 Jun 2019 07:48:07 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>
>> On 2/28/2019 9:44 PM, Douglas D.. Anderson wrote:
>>
>>> [Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]
>>> ------------------------------------------------
>>>
>>> Version 10.0
>>
>> <clip>
>>
>> seems new folk are all coming in via G-groups
>
> It's the new AOL.

I've yet to witness a reply exchanged between any of them. It's like
they're either afraid to communicate or the lack of pics, memes and
colors in general sterilizes 'em

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 15, 2019, 4:07:49 PM6/15/19
to
On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> alt.flame

..Usenet's Millennial safe-space closet w/a free puppy per complaint

Ṃᴆ

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Jun 15, 2019, 4:08:42 PM6/15/19
to
On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> Goddamnit, I like Johnny Winter. Edgar, too.

https://youtu.be/dzStP6vNk3Q

he deserves higher than #63 on Rolling Stone's All-time Greatest

ob joke

A Yale professor travels to Africa to live with a primitive tribe and
spends years with them 'til the Chief's wife gives birth to a white kid.

The chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look, you're the only
white man we've ever seen around here, and this woman just gave birth to
a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"

The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here
is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino.
Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one
black one. Nature does this on occasion."

The chief was silent for a moment, then said, "Tell you what. You don't
say anything more about that sheep and I won't say anything more about
the white kid."


Ṃᴆ

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Jun 15, 2019, 4:09:12 PM6/15/19
to
On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> Damn shame there ain't any VR drugs.

besides Limbaugh, Levin, Bongino, Ingraham and the occasional Jones,
there's always teenslutanalfisting.com

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 16, 2019, 5:38:37 PM6/16/19
to
On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> <sigh> Where's Stepin Fetchit when ya really need him...

he should've been the lead in Blazing Saddles, which should've been a
franchise quadruple trilogy that buried Star Wars, E.T., and Titanic,
collectively

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jun 18, 2019, 7:45:26 PM6/18/19
to
It's funny, Stokely Carmichael, founder of "Black Power", leader of
SNCC and Black Panthers (and associate Charles Hamilton) wrote a book
years ago called "Black Power" in which he states that 99% of deep
south nigs were perfectly content staying on the plantations, and it
was the invention and development of automatic harvesting machines
that put them out of work and started the great migrations north in
the late 40's and early 50's looking for work. So that's when they ran
face to face into the hard ass Irish, Italian and Jewish labor unions
and moguls that didn't want to compete with a bunch of cheap labor
scabs.

So it's the damn mechanical engineers who built the agricultural
machinery ressponsible for fucking everything up. Now the country has
millions of unemployed nigs hanging out selling and using drugs while
the factories crumble. Trump says black unemployment is the lowest
it's ever been... could have fooled me, it looks like it's down to
10,000,000 unemployed from 10,000,007.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jun 18, 2019, 7:56:26 PM6/18/19
to
On Sat, 15 Jun 2019 14:08:42 -0600, ??
Heh... th professor talked his way out of death by rooroo.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jun 18, 2019, 8:03:15 PM6/18/19
to
On Sat, 15 Jun 2019 14:09:10 -0600, ??
And speaking of foreigners influencing American elections, what about
reporters and "journalists" like Christiane Amanpour, Steve Hilton,
Mark Steyn, and other foreign nationals on network news channels,
arrogantly lecturing us about how "we" should be running America?
(The dead give away is the funny accents... no wait a minute, that
doesn't explain Bernie Sanders...)

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 8:59:37 PM6/21/19
to
On 6/18/2019 9:09 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 15 Jun 2019 14:09:10 -0600, ??
> I'm looking forward to DebbieDoesDonkeys.com.

why wait.. they've already got a live version in Tijuana

https://youtu.be/GJ1yg1pKnXE

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 9:04:07 PM6/21/19
to
On 6/18/2019 9:09 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 15 Jun 2019 14:07:48 -0600, ??
> Lots of happy friendly people! . . . ... killing puppies...

<checking>

the bulk have migrated to auk w/ac as the perpetual 'archive' (currently
in some sort of war with acola) - af's got less traffic than atj, if
that's even possible (though atj is likely still the most lurked,
meaning DDA might actually have a shot at reviving it) - and aavfff
looks like af's clone

afkmn & ar, unbelievably, are ghost towns, though 2600 is still thriving
with who knows how many nyms vs socks

<blows snot into trash>

..which reminds me..

I may've inadvertently killed RC

<hic>

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 9:05:40 PM6/21/19
to
On 6/18/2019 9:09 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 15 Jun 2019 14:07:10 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>
>> On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:
>>
>>> On Thu, 13 Jun 2019 07:48:07 -0600, ??
>>> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>>>
>>>> On 2/28/2019 9:44 PM, Douglas D.. Anderson wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> [Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]
>>>>> ------------------------------------------------
>>>>>
>>>>> Version 10.0
>>>>
>>>> <clip>
>>>>
>>>> seems new folk are all coming in via G-groups
>>>
>>> It's the new AOL.
>>
>> I've yet to witness a reply exchanged between any of them. It's
>> like they're either afraid to communicate or the lack of pics,
>> memes and colors in general sterilizes 'em
>
> It just gets too complicated without a 'like' button to click. Plus
> there's always the chance someone might not like what you write and
> denigrate your response. And a non-PC reply is simply unthinkable.

FB is a perpetual "look at me too" community of the most sensitive
whiners there are. PC is just expected out in the open or the 'deep
mods' will eventually catch on and begin phasing out your account.

Twitter is more of an actual communication tool where only the most
blatantly conservative will be weeded out. I suppose the only immunity
from that rule is to become POTUS.

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 9:10:45 PM6/21/19
to
On 6/18/2019 9:09 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 15 Jun 2019 14:08:42 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>
>> On 6/15/2019 10:32 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:
>>
>>> On Fri, 14 Jun 2019 02:16:42 -0600, ??
>>> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>>>
>>>> On 3/29/2019 11:22 AM, Douglas D.. Anderson wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> On Tue, 26 Mar 2019 04:13:07 -0000, "gonzo"
>>>>> <gonzot...@hohum.net> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> In the early 70's I listed to the arly Firesign Theater
>>>>> albums (for young people who don't know what the word "album"
>>>>> means, they were 12 inch diameter flat black plastic disks
>>>>> used to record sound before miccro-SD was invented) so much a
>>>>> lot of the material is still stuck in my head, like
>>>>>
>>>>> (describing what is America:)
>>>>>
>>>>> "It's kikes and wops and niggers and spics, With noses as big
>>>>> as your arm, It's girls with pimples and criplies with
>>>>> dimples And honkeys who never left the farm!...."
>>>>
>>>> exactly.. the wheelchair-bound were trolls, "little people"
>>>> were midgets or dwarfs, the HIV-infected were freaks wholly
>>>> rejected by society (along with albinos, japs/chincs, retards,
>>>> bums, hobos, trannies -- complete outcasts -- and of course
>>>> liberals, jews and their camel-raping counterparts).
>>>
>>> Goddamnit, I like Johnny Winter. Edgar, too.
>>
>> https://youtu.be/dzStP6vNk3Q
>>
>> he deserves higher than #63 on Rolling Stone's All-time Greatest
>
> Jeez, who could you bump to put him higher?

John Lennon, Clarence White and Muddy Waters immediately come to mind


Ṃᴆ

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Jun 21, 2019, 9:11:31 PM6/21/19
to
On 6/18/2019 9:09 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sun, 16 Jun 2019 15:38:36 -0600, ??
> Mel Brooks couldn't make a movie these days.

Last I saw he was living with Carl Reiner. The two of them could reboot
Blazing Saddles if they timed their naps correctly.

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 9:19:19 PM6/21/19
to
there's gotta be a blurb about pre-British/French-conquered African nigs
somewhere, but I've never been able to find it

I just want to know if their extreme socialistic mindset is genetic or
was imparted gradually as Africa was taken over by limeys and frogs

IF there was a time they were responsible, organized, and hard-working
hunter/gatherers, why can't those (supposedly) inherent traits be tapped
into again?


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 9:23:03 PM6/21/19
to
pretty sure this is the only African comedian alive.. improv or otherwise

https://youtu.be/Q9jqoBL5KPU

the professor talked his way out being shish kabobed


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 21, 2019, 9:25:34 PM6/21/19
to
if it weren't for the politically-charged MSM, we wouldn't have needed a
Trump in the first place

what's amazing is their ability to keep false narratives going while
suppressing the obvious truths one could gather from glancing at the
House/Senate committee hearings on CSPAN for 5 minutes a day under the
auspice that ceaseless lying from Democrats & RINOs is an axiom

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jun 23, 2019, 7:26:00 PM6/23/19
to
[Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Version 10.0

Posting Frequency: Every Week, more or less.
Last-modified: September 2, 2018
Maintained by Douglas D. Anderson (douganderson1981.gmail.com)
Formerly by Raymond Jensen (r...@andrew.spam.me.not.cmu.edu)
and before that by Jeroen van Kessel (jvke...@knoware.NOSPAM.nl,
and before that, Dave Pease (dpe...@c-prompt-sd.com)
HTML by Steven Willoughby (ora...@synapse.net)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Introduction

Greetings and welcome to what used to be the funniest place on the
Internet. Unfortunately, through lack of proper use atj is not what it
used to be.

Please read this FAQ if you are a newcomer to the group or if you
think it's okay to flame (racists, England, Minnesota, USA, Hillary
Clinton, Colin Kaepernick, etc.) without writing a joke.

If you don't feel like reading this entire FAQ, please remember the
following 2 rules:

*** DON'T POST TO THE NEWSGROUP WITHOUT INCLUDING A JOKE ***
*** DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU ***

As long as you always abide by this, and others do the same, this
newsgroup will be a much more rewarding endeavor for everyone.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

2. Table of Contents

1. Introduction

2. Table of Contents

3. Safe Use of atj - a note for newbies

4. Frequently Asked Questions

5. Other resources

6. Conclusion

7. objoke

8. Take me to the alt.tasteless.jokes newsgroup

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

3. Safe Use of atj - a note for newbies

So you are a new participant in this newsgroup, eh? Well, I hope you
have your asbestos suit handy--because, regardless of what folks say,
atj is a mine field for new members. The people who read this group
are not very patient with silly mistakes, and are not very restrained
in going about flaming them. This place is not for the weak of
spirit...

That being said, if you go over this FAQ carefully, your chances of
posting unburned will be significantly higher. And just remember: if
there's one thing this newsgroup needs, it's new blood, newbies with
new jokes. So, regardless of the result, if you are posting new
material to atj, your work will be appreciated by the (probably
silent) majority.

Good luck.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

4. Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Hi. I don't want to read this whole long FAQ. Got any quick advice
for me?

A: Yes. Don't post anything to this newsgroup without including a
tasteless joke along with it. That's the most important thing I can
tell you.

Q: What is a joke?

A: The word "joke" comes from "yoke", to "join together". A "joke" is
like a koan, joining together two or more thoughts or concepts which
are held to be serious and even sacred, but which are irreconcilable.
For example-

"What would Jesus do?" + "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?"
= "What would Jesus do for a Klondike Bar?"

"Government" + "Intelligence"
= "Government Intelligence"

Some jokes are more complex, such as "Bungee Jumping in Mexico"
and "Death by Rooroo", and "The parable of the wedding guest", but
similarly conjoin irreconcilable concepts.

Q: I see the description of this newsgroup is "sometimes disgusting
rather than tasteless or funny." Does that mean it's proper to post
stuff that is just plain disgusting, even if it's not funny?

A: No. The description was written that way because too many folks
post useless junk instead of tasteless jokes. If everyone posted
appropriate material to this newsgroup, that description would no
longer apply. Let's all work towards this end. Please post only
tasteless jokes here. If you want to become proficient at this, study
the work of such masters of tasteless jokes as Bob Tulk and Blanche
Knott.

Q: Hi, I'm not interested in what this group's about, I'm just testing
my news gateway here, sorry about that, only be a minute-

A: There are places for testing your net connection. This is not one
of them. Neither is any other newsgroup not named alt.test or
something like it. Please take your tests there. Otherwise be prepared
to get flamed.

Q: Hey, I found this *great* book entitled "How to Win Friends and
Influence People" written by this visionary named Dale Carnegie that
I'd like to show to all you guys-

A: Please don't. You won't make any friends here like that.

Q: I like humor, but I don't want to be offended.
Is alt.tasteless.jokes for me?

A: No. Why don't you go to rec.humor.funny (a moderated newsgroup
guaranteed to be inoffensive) or rec.funny (which is probably a safer
bet for the thin-skinned)?

Q: I saw a joke that I liked, and I have a somewhat related joke that
I would like to post under the same thread. How should I go about
doing this?

A: Just go about your business using common sense. If it was a long
story joke that you read, and you want to post a joke relating to it,
you probably do not need to copy the whole joke into your reply.
This is especially inappropriate if you post a one-liner after a five
paragraph story joke. This wastes time, and is generally a good way
to get yourself flamed.

Q: I saw a joke that I liked. I'd like to tell the poster so. What is
the accepted way of doing this?

A: It's always better to do these things via email. Unfortunately
nobody uses real email addresses because of spambots.

Q: I saw a joke that just was not funny. It bothered me because it
made reference to (Hitler, Jews, whites, blacks, homosexuals, etc.)
in a disparaging manner. What can I do about this?

A: Good question. A general rule of thumb in this situation is that no
one cares what you think. If you post to the net with a flame of this
joke, you waste bandwidth and all you are doing is pissing other
people off. If a joke is not funny, just let it die in peace. If you
have a good sense of humor, and have correctly gauged the joke's
value, it will disappear quickly. If not, you, and not the poster, may
be the problem. In this group there is no such thing as political
correctness, and nothing is "taboo", nothing is sacred - "freedom of
speech" is the rule, and if your joke includes terms such as "kikes",
"wops", "niggers", "crackers", "spics" or "fudge-packers", no one is
going to care as long as you are posting a joke and not some
intentionally threatening or inflammatory diatribe.

Q: That's not good enough. I want to let this person know that I do
not appreciate the joke and possibly shame him/her into refraining
from posting in the future. What do I do now?

A: It's always good to have such dedication on this group - keeps us
strong. If you feel the need to flame the poster of this joke, by all
means do it. Hey, it's a free world, right?

Q: It's not possible. I want to tell the world what I think. I'm
posting on the net and if you don't like it then screw off, okay?

A: I was afraid it would get to this point. If you need to post a
flame for everyone to see and appreciate (and I have seen some
flames that qualify as being material that I appreciate) then post a
joke with it. That's what the 'objoke' means on all of these posts
around here. Were this newsgroup used correctly there would be at
least one joke in every post. So if you've got a complaint that you
want the world to hear, include a joke that you want the world to hear
and you will be more appreciated.

Q: Okay, how about this (Mel, Lik_My_Sak, et. al.) guy? He really
pisses me off every time he posts - and he posts a lot. How do I get
him to stop? Flame every one of his posts?

A: It's called a killfile. Look into it.

Q: I saw a joke that was very insensitive to the struggles of (insert
minority here). Isn't that illegal?

A: Look. Can you read the name of this group? Here, let me help you -
alt.tasteless.jokes. When you read a joke about blacks, or Chicanos,
or mathematicians, what you are reading is the epitome of
tastelessness, i.e. judging a group of people based on stereotypes. My
advice to you would be deal with it. I guarantee that for every one of
you who is offended, a bunch of tasteless people found the joke very
funny. So shut yer yap. Remember who you are dealing with here: not
alt.sensitivity, alt.save.the.earth, alt.save.the.whales., or
alt.inner.child. The people who post here are often crude, obnoxious
and un presentable in public. Hence the term tasteless in the
newsgroup title. If you are offended by a joke then perhaps you are in
the wrong place.

And no, it's not illegal to post such a joke.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

5. Other resources

A. Humor newsgroups

* alt.humor.best-of-usenet - The funniest posts from all over the
usenet.
* alt.humor.puns - If you find such things funny...
* rec.humor.funny - A moderated newsgroup. Tame.
* rec.humor - Less caustic than atj.
* talk.bizarre - Funny-peculiar stuff.
* alt.change.lightbulb - pretty self explanatory.

B. Tasteless newsgroups

* alt.tasteless - The drainage culvert below the information
superhighway.
* alt.tasteless.penis - I haven't got a clue and I probably am
better
off that way...
* alt.binaries.pictures.grotesque - Stomach-turning binary posts.

C. Flame newsgroups

* alt.flame - If you'd like to generically piss someone off for no
good
reason, atj is *not* the best place to do it. In alt.flame, they
like
this type of thing. Get off on it or something. Whatever. In any
case,
please post your basic flames here, and not in atj.
* alt.nuke.europe - If you've got a problem with England, this is a
*great* place to check out.
* alt.nuke.the.USA - If you've got a problem with the United
States,
this is a *great* place to check out.

D. Web sites

See the Humor HOTList for other WWW sites.

E. Ghosts to watch out for- if you see new posts from any of these
folks, contact the Ghost Adventures crew immediately-

G - P (aka Girdle Popper), Mr. FBI (aka Mr Funnybone International),
+Wayne, Spitfire, Jule§, Gernot Lachner (aka vampeleon, RIP),
CheechWizard, Blob, OverMuch, Loz, Omar the Camel Humper,
Tropigal, Mi MM ke, Lancome_Girl, Ærchie, ur_droll, Lik Mai Sak,
Leigh, RamSys, Vanilla Gorilla (Monkey Boy), MadMax, Keith E.,
Mel (aka Richard Catto)

F. Keys to the Kingdom:

Terms and abbreviations commonly used in this and other newsgroups:

http://www.harley.com/usenet/usenet-tutorial/

http://mugsy.org/asa_faq/glossary/usenet.shtml

In addition, you may find other abbreviations not so well documented,
such as

ESOD - "Eat shit and die."
ESOL - "Eat shit and live",

etc., which might be best learned by searching the Google Groups
archive. Beware asking regular users, this is like asking a passing
stranger in The Bronx, NY, for directions.

Good advice: when adding to a thread, always post to the bottom, and
avoid leaving a lot of headers on top, unless you intend to be
annoying.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

6. Conclusion

If you want to flame me (or anyone) in the newsgroup please include
an objoke when you do so. Additional suggestion- avoid posting
binaries
here, and avoid crossposting to non-humor groups if at all possible.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

7. objoke

>From: ka...@earth.without.spam.net (´¯`·.¸¸. Karel .¸¸.·´¯`)
>
>There were two friends in Russia. Both of them were drunks. One of
>them was happy, while another sad. The happy one asked the other:
>"Tell me, what's buggin' ya?"
>"You see, when I come home drunk, my wife locks a door. I have to walk
>the streets for many hours, and get into trouble with police. They
>want to get rid off me at work. Nothing to cheer about."
>"You know, I had that problem in the past, but found a solution. I am
>undressing naked at the stairways, press a bell button. When my wife
>opens a door, I throw my clothes inside. She is affraid of the
>scandal, so she lets me in."
>"You know, I gonna try it."
>Few weeks later they meet again and the sad guy is even worse than
>usual.
>"What happend? Did you try my method?"
>"Let me tell you. I undressed, pressed the button. The door opened. I
>threw all of my clothes, the doors closed. And then I heard: The next
>station - Red Square"

8. Take me to the alt.tasteless.jokes newsgroup

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jun 23, 2019, 7:43:55 PM6/23/19
to
On Fri, 21 Jun 2019 19:19:09 -0600, ??
Most American blacks (except for John Lewis) are as much as 7/8 white,
and typically at least 1/4 to 1/2 white... and a lot, like Obama,
aren't even decended from American slaves... maybe the government
should go ahead with the "reparation" theory, but all claimants would
have too prove what what dna percentage comes from American slaves...
and have to prove who is genetically decended from slave owners, and
what perentage at that. Considering how slow and retarded Congress is,
it would take them several centuries to get that sorted out. (Btw-
if it turns out they are less than 1/2 decended from American slaves
they have to make reparation to themselves ).

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 25, 2019, 5:42:34 PM6/25/19
to
even the direct-line, 100%-related-to generations of the most horribly
treated slaves don't deserve a red cent considering the entire country
belongs to whomever the American Indians originally wiped out when they
migrated here from the then-existing Siberian/North American land bridge

since the Indians wiped them all out, everyone starts with a clean slate
and should let bygones be bygones

..and out of respect for those long-lost American ancestors, all North
_and_ South American land should be entirely free, retroactive back to
the original deed holder, meaning that not only should we be able to
club people over the head and claim any amount of land we'd like to
defend for ourselves, we'd also be justified in pursuing retribution
from the dozens of previous owners of those particular plots

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 4:47:36 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/26/2019 8:33 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 21 Jun 2019 19:11:21 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>> he should've been the lead in Blazing Saddles, which should've
>>>> been a franchise quadruple trilogy that buried Star Wars, E.T.,
>>>> and Titanic, collectively
>>>
>>> Mel Brooks couldn't make a movie these days.
>>
>> Last I saw he was living with Carl Reiner. The two of them could
>> reboot Blazing Saddles if they timed their naps correctly.
>
> It'd end up like every other remake...

apparently you haven't seen any recent remakes


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 4:48:24 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/26/2019 8:33 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 21 Jun 2019 19:10:45 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> exactly.. the wheelchair-bound were trolls, "little
>>>>>> people" were midgets or dwarfs, the HIV-infected were
>>>>>> freaks wholly rejected by society (along with albinos,
>>>>>> japs/chincs, retards, bums, hobos, trannies -- complete
>>>>>> outcasts -- and of course liberals, jews and their
>>>>>> camel-raping counterparts).
>>>>>
>>>>> Goddamnit, I like Johnny Winter. Edgar, too.
>>>>
>>>> https://youtu.be/dzStP6vNk3Q
>>>>
>>>> he deserves higher than #63 on Rolling Stone's All-time
>>>> Greatest
>>>
>>> Jeez, who could you bump to put him higher?
>>
>> John Lennon, Clarence White and Muddy Waters immediately come to
>> mind
>
> Okay, I'll give you Lennon. Just don't let him loose.

Chapman's five hollow-points took care of that


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 4:50:43 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/26/2019 8:33 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> Because they were too busy raiding other tribes for captives to sell
> to slave traders. The captors did the hunting and the slaves they
> kept for their own fun did the gathering.

..and we can't incorporate that system in the U.S. today because...?


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 4:51:29 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/26/2019 8:33 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 21 Jun 2019 18:59:27 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> experienced those VR (virtual reality) goggles a few months
>>>>>> ago -- some basketball footage -- and if they're going to
>>>>>> use that for pr0n along with those silicon fuck dolls..
>>>>>> there ain't gonna be anymore night clubs, strip joints,
>>>>>> escorts, massage parlors, or adult-anything that's even
>>>>>> remotely marketable
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I don't think Mel realized how cutting-edge his lifestyle
>>>>>> really was
>>>>>
>>>>> Damn shame there ain't any VR drugs.
>>>>
>>>> besides Limbaugh, Levin, Bongino, Ingraham and the occasional
>>>> Jones, there's always teenslutanalfisting.com
>>>
>>> I'm looking forward to DebbieDoesDonkeys.com.
>>
>> why wait.. they've already got a live version in Tijuana
>>
>> https://youtu.be/GJ1yg1pKnXE
>
> You need to get a free trial at one of the premium Usenet providers
> and check out the beast groups.

never been even remotely attracted to any bitch who'd allow a horse,
dog, or any non-human mammal/reptile tool inside any orifice


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 4:52:08 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/26/2019 8:33 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 21 Jun 2019 19:03:56 -0600, ??
> Try that with alt.test.
>
> The binary groups are going strong. All the movies, music and pr0n
> any perv needs.

xhamster, spankbang, and reddit provide all the HD Vina Sky, Asuna Fox,
Odette Delacroix, Rebel Lynn, Jade Kush, Hannah Hays, Anjelica Ebbi,
Charity Crawford, Piper Perri, Kenzie Reeves, Alex Grey, and Paisley Rae
I'll ever need (outside Met Art, Amour Angels, and Showy Beauty filling
in the 'stunner' gaps)

that, and there's plenty of nightclubs in my area to keep me going well
into my late nineties, when 18yr olds will finally be out of reach

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 4:52:22 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/26/2019 8:33 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 21 Jun 2019 19:05:30 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> On 2/28/2019 9:44 PM, Douglas D.. Anderson wrote:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> [Alt.Tasteless.Jokes FAQ]
>>>>>>> ------------------------------------------------
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Version 10.0
>>>>>>
>>>>>> <clip>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> seems new folk are all coming in via G-groups
>>>>>
>>>>> It's the new AOL.
>>>>
>>>> I've yet to witness a reply exchanged between any of them.
>>>> It's like they're either afraid to communicate or the lack of
>>>> pics, memes and colors in general sterilizes 'em
>>>
>>> It just gets too complicated without a 'like' button to click.
>>> Plus there's always the chance someone might not like what you
>>> write and denigrate your response. And a non-PC reply is simply
>>> unthinkable.
>>
>> FB is a perpetual "look at me too" community of the most sensitive
>> whiners there are. PC is just expected out in the open or the
>> 'deep mods' will eventually catch on and begin phasing out your
>> account.
>>
>> Twitter is more of an actual communication tool where only the
>> most blatantly conservative will be weeded out. I suppose the only
>> immunity from that rule is to become POTUS.
>
> I have a bunch of fb entries in my HOSTS file. Twitter and
> Instagram are gonna be there soon. I don't use gloogle, either. I'm
> one of those wild eyed privacy kooks who don't like all their data
> collection.

there's plenty of browser plugin/extensions that take care of all that

setting up various secured, wholly anon accounts of various aged,
various sex, various race identities to attract whatever you desire's
pretty much a snap these days

I must have 200+ 'hard-luck' identities siphoning millions in donations
right into an anonymous secured off-shore debit card account that I can
remotely manage from any number of yachts I have scattered in different
WiFi-enabled marinas around six of the seven continents


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 5:08:59 PM6/29/19
to
On 6/27/2019 10:37 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sun, 23 Jun 2019 19:43:53 -0400, Douglas D.. Anderson
> <dougande...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>> Most American blacks (except for John Lewis) are as much as 7/8
>> white, and typically at least 1/4 to 1/2 white... and a lot, like
>> Obama, aren't even decended from American slaves... maybe the
>> government should go ahead with the "reparation" theory, but all
>> claimants would have too prove what what dna percentage comes from
>> American slaves... and have to prove who is genetically decended
>> from slave owners, and what perentage at that. Considering how slow
>> and retarded Congress is, it would take them several centuries to
>> get that sorted out. (Btw- if it turns out they are less than 1/2
>> decended from American slaves they have to make reparation to
>> themselves ).
>
> They've been getting reparations for years. It's called affirmative
> action.

..for which they likely owe reparations to us seeing as they're hardly
'disadvantaged'

they can get jobs easier in most professional sports, waste management,
practically the entire janitorial industry, every fast food joint that
doesn't have a dollar menu, sanctuary city & gang/cartel-led area
convenience stores, shoe shiners, hot dog vendors, and cheap night club
/ strip joint bouncing

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jun 29, 2019, 5:54:31 PM6/29/19
to
On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:52:21 -0600, ??
There's good and bad in everything- when things get slow at some
weekend stoner party it could be fun to Google through a bunch of
"adult" sites, and then switch off to weather.com and watch the ads
for ball gags and dildos pop up alongside the weather forecast.

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jul 1, 2019, 9:25:06 PM7/1/19
to
On Sun, 30 Jun 2019 12:36:30 -0400, i.m....@aol.com wrote:
>Lazy bastards should being paying kickbacks.

Cory Booker and Kamala Harris are a case in point... both of them have
just a bit more African DNA than Elizabeth Warren has Cherokee DNA,
and both have to repeatedly remind their viewers that they identify as
"darkey", otherwise they'd forget... Harris' mother was Tamil Indian
and father was "Jamaican", probably more French Creole than
Rastafarian, Booker "black-washes" his past, but I'd be really
surprised if he could prove he's more than 1/8 African DNA.

Hell, people who are 1/2 African like Obama, Juan Williams, Tiger
Woods make Booker look like a cracker.

So how does that ad up to "White Privilege" if all these people less
than 1/2 Camaroon Coon want people to think they're "African
American"?

Douglas D.. Anderson

unread,
Jul 1, 2019, 9:45:47 PM7/1/19
to
On Sun, 30 Jun 2019 12:45:56 -0400, i.m....@aol.com wrote:
>Justifiable homicide. Or maybe mercy killing, if you factor in Yoko
>Ono.

"Give Ireland back to the Irish,
Give Lapland Back to the Laps,
Give Taiwan back to the Chinese,
and Give Yoko back to the Japs..."

from the National Lampoon album "Radio Dinner"

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:20:20 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:17 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:47:34 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> he should've been the lead in Blazing Saddles, which
>>>>>> should've been a franchise quadruple trilogy that buried
>>>>>> Star Wars, E.T., and Titanic, collectively
>>>>>
>>>>> Mel Brooks couldn't make a movie these days.
>>>>
>>>> Last I saw he was living with Carl Reiner. The two of them
>>>> could reboot Blazing Saddles if they timed their naps
>>>> correctly.
>>>
>>> It'd end up like every other remake...
>>
>> apparently you haven't seen any recent remakes
>
> Nope. Hell, I usually even avoid movie versions of books I've read.

can't think of a book I've read where they made a movie besides a few
flicks they made about 9/11 in an attempt to cover up truth

fiction novels have never appealed to me for some reason

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:21:19 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:26 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:
> Oh, we can. I just enjoy pointing out that jigs sold other jigs.
> It pisses off the spooks.

shouldn't even be a surprise to 'em seeing as they kill each other at a
far greater rate than whitey does, though I think we've covertly built
up the type of laws and communities around them to ensure they keep
drive-bys the norm

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:21:32 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:26 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:48:22 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>> John Lennon, Clarence White and Muddy Waters immediately come
>>>> to mind
>>>
>>> Okay, I'll give you Lennon. Just don't let him loose.
>>
>> Chapman's five hollow-points took care of that
>
> Justifiable homicide. Or maybe mercy killing, if you factor in Yoko
> Ono.

Asian women don't count in normal relationship rules.. they always end
up driving their white husbands clinically insane


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:21:55 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:36 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 15:08:57 -0600, ??
> Lazy bastards should being paying kickbacks.

one of the reasons paper money needs to go.. we can charge their credit
cards, bitcoin accounts, or checking accounts with auto withdrawals for
90+% of their share in drug deals, sold stolen items, child support,
parking tickets, DUI/DWI/speeding/eluding/drive-by shooting fines,
fraudulent food stamp ploys, undeserved welfare/SSDI/SSI checks and
Medicaid payments toward their perpetual, ever-increasing variety of
STDs, not to mention everyday fines for disturbing the peace, smelling
up public restrooms, graffiti damages, and being a public nuisance in
general

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:24:55 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:36 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:51:28 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>> You need to get a free trial at one of the premium Usenet
>>> providers and check out the beast groups.
>>
>> never been even remotely attracted to any bitch who'd allow a
>> horse, dog, or any non-human mammal/reptile tool inside any
>> orifice
>
> 'Attracted to' isn't the same as 'laughing at.'

I just think it's sad, though I suppose the type of women who'd actually
do it deserve the humiliation


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:26:37 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:36 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:52:21 -0600, ??
> One HOSTS file does, too. If TAILS was anywhere near solid beta,
> I'd probably give it a shot.

<checking>

apparently used on a memory stick for TOR-browsing the 'dark net', aka,
kp shit

>> setting up various secured, wholly anon accounts of various aged,
>> various sex, various race identities to attract whatever you
>> desire's pretty much a snap these days
>>
>> I must have 200+ 'hard-luck' identities siphoning millions in
>> donations right into an anonymous secured off-shore debit card
>> account that I can remotely manage from any number of yachts I have
>> scattered in different WiFi-enabled marinas around six of the seven
>> continents
>
> Too many fudgesicles in number seven?

assuming we can get 'em cargo-barged out there.. _way_ too many


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:31:21 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:45 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:48:22 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>
> Justifiable homicide. Or maybe mercy killing, if you factor in Yoko
> Ono.

hmmm.. maybe eternal.september's doing the same shit as it did to me

not propagating right away so you're re-sending

that's _really_ giving benefit of the doubt


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 2, 2019, 4:32:09 AM7/2/19
to
On 6/30/2019 10:46 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Sat, 29 Jun 2019 14:47:34 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> he should've been the lead in Blazing Saddles, which
>>>>>> should've been a franchise quadruple trilogy that buried
>>>>>> Star Wars, E.T., and Titanic, collectively
>>>>>
>>>>> Mel Brooks couldn't make a movie these days.
>>>>
>>>> Last I saw he was living with Carl Reiner. The two of them
>>>> could reboot Blazing Saddles if they timed their naps
>>>> correctly.
>>>
>>> It'd end up like every other remake...
>>
>> apparently you haven't seen any recent remakes
>
> Nope. Hell, I usually even avoid movie versions of books I've read.

but you missed a few of my replies, too

<thinking>

how many fingers am I holding up?

<high-fiving screen>

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:44:35 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:20:19 -0600, ??
> I read almost anything. Lotsa WW2 and cowboy era history. Terry
> Pratchett stuff is some of the funniest ever written. Ditto P. G.
> Wodehouse. And the old stuff is good. I read Homer. So sue me.

I'm wondering if Hollywood will ever try making a Discworld saga

here's to the original old fart in a hat

<clink>

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:44:57 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:32:08 -0600, ??
> d'oh?!? FOUR! Jeez, that was too easy.

knew it was the sauce.. my thumb was ripped off in a paragliding
accident and replaced with a second middle finger

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:47:49 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:21:17 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> there's gotta be a blurb about
>>>>>> pre-British/French-conquered African nigs somewhere, but
>>>>>> I've never been able to find it
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I just want to know if their extreme socialistic mindset
>>>>>> is genetic or was imparted gradually as Africa was taken
>>>>>> over by limeys and frogs
>>>>>>
>>>>>> IF there was a time they were responsible, organized, and
>>>>>> hard-working hunter/gatherers, why can't those
>>>>>> (supposedly) inherent traits be tapped into again?
>>>>>
>>>>> Because they were too busy raiding other tribes for captives
>>>>> to sell to slave traders. The captors did the hunting and
>>>>> the slaves they kept for their own fun did the gathering.
>>>>
>>>> ..and we can't incorporate that system in the U.S. today
>>>> because...?
>>>
>>> Oh, we can. I just enjoy pointing out that jigs sold other
>>> jigs. It pisses off the spooks.
>>
>> shouldn't even be a surprise to 'em seeing as they kill each other
>> at a far greater rate than whitey does, though I think we've
>> covertly built up the type of laws and communities around them to
>> ensure they keep drive-bys the norm
>
> Ain't America great?

always wanted to pit a successful gang/cartel against another in such a
manner that they almost completely wipe each other out at a location
away from their cash hoards and grab the cash while the police are still
fumbling about at the kill scene


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:51:31 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:21:31 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> John Lennon, Clarence White and Muddy Waters immediately
>>>>>> come to mind
>>>>>
>>>>> Okay, I'll give you Lennon. Just don't let him loose.
>>>>
>>>> Chapman's five hollow-points took care of that
>>>
>>> Justifiable homicide. Or maybe mercy killing, if you factor in
>>> Yoko Ono.
>>
>> Asian women don't count in normal relationship rules.. they always
>> end up driving their white husbands clinically insane
>
> It's the slanted cooter. Does weird things to a guy.

if they wouldn't pixelate the shaved ones, Japs would already rule the
pr0n industry


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:52:19 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:26:29 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>> I have a bunch of fb entries in my HOSTS file. Twitter and
>>>>> Instagram are gonna be there soon. I don't use gloogle,
>>>>> either. I'm one of those wild eyed privacy kooks who don't
>>>>> like all their data collection.
>>>>
>>>> there's plenty of browser plugin/extensions that take care of
>>>> all that
>>>
>>> One HOSTS file does, too. If TAILS was anywhere near solid
>>> beta, I'd probably give it a shot.
>>
>> <checking>
>>
>> apparently used on a memory stick for TOR-browsing the 'dark net',
>> aka, kp shit
>
> Only more like a TOR based OS rather than just a browser.

from the little I saw, there's stable versions already available

>>>> setting up various secured, wholly anon accounts of various
>>>> aged, various sex, various race identities to attract whatever
>>>> you desire's pretty much a snap these days
>>>>
>>>> I must have 200+ 'hard-luck' identities siphoning millions in
>>>> donations right into an anonymous secured off-shore debit card
>>>> account that I can remotely manage from any number of yachts I
>>>> have scattered in different WiFi-enabled marinas around six of
>>>> the seven continents
>>>
>>> Too many fudgesicles in number seven?
>>
>> assuming we can get 'em cargo-barged out there.. _way_ too many
>
> Should dual purpose rocket launches. I'm sure the fireball of a
> launch would incinerate 1000 or so. Not a complete solution, but it
> would be a start.

I liked Moonraker, too.. they should've shown a successful rendering of
that with a bunch of other victims before letting Bond inevitably escape


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:52:35 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:31:17 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> John Lennon, Clarence White and Muddy Waters immediately come to
>>>>>> mind
>>>>>
>>>>> Okay, I'll give you Lennon. Just don't let him loose.
>>>>
>>>> Chapman's five hollow-points took care of that
>>>
>>> Justifiable homicide. Or maybe mercy killing, if you factor in Yoko
>>> Ono.
>>
>> hmmm.. maybe eternal.september's doing the same shit as it did to me
>>
>> not propagating right away so you're re-sending
>>
>> that's _really_ giving benefit of the doubt
>
> <bzzzzzt> Wrong guess. You can have one more guess OR take a chance
> on curtain number one.

some glitch in Agent?

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 3:52:54 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:24:55 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>> You need to get a free trial at one of the premium Usenet
>>>>> providers and check out the beast groups.
>>>>
>>>> never been even remotely attracted to any bitch who'd allow a
>>>> horse, dog, or any non-human mammal/reptile tool inside any
>>>> orifice
>>>
>>> 'Attracted to' isn't the same as 'laughing at.'
>>
>> I just think it's sad, though I suppose the type of women who'd
>> actually do it deserve the humiliation
>
> And the laughter.

just a matter of time before one of 'em ends up preggers.. hopefully
with a horse ..and in Alabama, so she can't abort it


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 8, 2019, 4:07:12 AM7/8/19
to
On 7/5/2019 8:19 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 2 Jul 2019 02:21:53 -0600, ??
> Great, you want fb and Amazon money. Or are you paying with your
> phone?

my phone's too dumb to do anything outside of talk and text

a cashless society would still have credit/debit cards.. pretty much all
I ever use

cash is for niggers, messicans, whores, the homeless, and cheap Asian
restaurants ..all expendable


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Jul 20, 2019, 12:46:23 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:44:34 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>> fiction novels have never appealed to me for some reason
>>>
>>> I read almost anything. Lotsa WW2 and cowboy era history.
>>> Terry Pratchett stuff is some of the funniest ever written.
>>> Ditto P. G. Wodehouse. And the old stuff is good. I read Homer.
>>> So sue me.
>>
>> I'm wondering if Hollywood will ever try making a Discworld saga
>>
>> here's to the original old fart in a hat
>>
>> <clink>
>
> The limey's have done Hogfather, The Color of Magic, and Going
> Postal. Maybe one more. There are animated versions of three more DW
> novels. And a Johnny and the Dead movie.
>
> GNU Terry Pratchett.

you know there's alt.fan.pratchett, btw..

Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 12:47:08 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:52:34 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>> hmmm.. maybe eternal.september's doing the same shit as it did
>>>> to me
>>>>
>>>> not propagating right away so you're re-sending
>>>>
>>>> that's _really_ giving benefit of the doubt
>>>
>>> <bzzzzzt> Wrong guess. You can have one more guess OR take a
>>> chance on curtain number one.
>>
>> some glitch in Agent?
>
> I posted a batch of messages and when they were gone, a bunch
> reappeared in the outbox. Send them and some show up again. Send
> again. Now you know the whole ugly truth.

had the same happen to a whole batch almost two decades ago

thankfully, we were all in the middle of coming up with new 9/11 jokes
for anyone to notice or care

think I had three or four originals posted before the second tower collapsed




Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 12:48:54 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:47:43 -0600, ??
> You'd need a couple semis and drivers, but I suppose they could
> easily be disposed.

there's so many billions of dollars inside the walls of these cartel
leaders' mansions, the problem would be airlifting the physical weight
of the cash out of the country

semis wouldn't work without a battalion of tanks escorting them out, and
even that's assuming a shitload of air support


Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 12:49:22 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:51:29 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>>>> John Lennon, Clarence White and Muddy Waters
>>>>>>>> immediately come to mind
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Okay, I'll give you Lennon. Just don't let him loose.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Chapman's five hollow-points took care of that
>>>>>
>>>>> Justifiable homicide. Or maybe mercy killing, if you factor
>>>>> in Yoko Ono.
>>>>
>>>> Asian women don't count in normal relationship rules.. they
>>>> always end up driving their white husbands clinically insane
>>>
>>> It's the slanted cooter. Does weird things to a guy.
>>
>> if they wouldn't pixelate the shaved ones, Japs would already rule
>> the pr0n industry
>
> I dunno, their pr0n has some weird shit going on. Gotta be a perv
> freak to get off on some of it. Good for chuckles, though.

it's the faces they make.. like they're being tortured and forced to lie
there against their will

if they all learned to act like Vina Sky, Japan would become a
superpower overnight


Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 12:49:53 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 02:07:12 -0600, ??
> Who you callin' nigger, whitey? I use cash for damn near
> everything, and the card only comes out when it absolutely has to.
> You ain't gettin' auto charges from me, bitch.

musta been a busboy at some cheap Asian restaurant.. or one of your
folks was an albino spook


Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 12:50:51 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:44:57 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>> apparently you haven't seen any recent remakes
>>>>>
>>>>> Nope. Hell, I usually even avoid movie versions of books
>>>>> I've read.
>>>>
>>>> but you missed a few of my replies, too
>>>>
>>>> <thinking>
>>>>
>>>> how many fingers am I holding up?
>>>>
>>>> <high-fiving screen>
>>>
>>> d'oh?!? FOUR! Jeez, that was too easy.
>>
>> knew it was the sauce.. my thumb was ripped off in a paragliding
>> accident and replaced with a second middle finger
>
> Whoa. Dual nose pickers. You must be a professional.

crazy spin control w/a 297 bowling average, and I make chix pass out
from hittin' their g-spot on both sides

Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 1:03:53 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:52:53 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>>> You need to get a free trial at one of the premium
>>>>>>> Usenet providers and check out the beast groups.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> never been even remotely attracted to any bitch who'd allow
>>>>>> a horse, dog, or any non-human mammal/reptile tool inside
>>>>>> any orifice
>>>>>
>>>>> 'Attracted to' isn't the same as 'laughing at.'
>>>>
>>>> I just think it's sad, though I suppose the type of women
>>>> who'd actually do it deserve the humiliation
>>>
>>> And the laughter.
>>
>> just a matter of time before one of 'em ends up preggers..
>> hopefully with a horse ..and in Alabama, so she can't abort it
>
> You get a mule by breeding a horse and donkey. I wonder what you'd
> call a horse/slut combo.

Barack


Ṃᴆ

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Jul 20, 2019, 1:11:33 AM7/20/19
to
On 7/11/2019 7:08 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 8 Jul 2019 01:52:19 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>>> I have a bunch of fb entries in my HOSTS file. Twitter
>>>>>>> and Instagram are gonna be there soon. I don't use
>>>>>>> gloogle, either. I'm one of those wild eyed privacy kooks
>>>>>>> who don't like all their data collection.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> there's plenty of browser plugin/extensions that take care
>>>>>> of all that
>>>>>
>>>>> One HOSTS file does, too. If TAILS was anywhere near solid
>>>>> beta, I'd probably give it a shot.
>>>>
>>>> <checking>
>>>>
>>>> apparently used on a memory stick for TOR-browsing the 'dark
>>>> net', aka, kp shit
>>>
>>> Only more like a TOR based OS rather than just a browser.
>>
>> from the little I saw, there's stable versions already available
>
> I haven't checked it for a long time, but it sounded to me like it's
> what an OS _should_ be - PRIVATE! Woulda been cool based on BeOS or
> maybe Plan 9, though.

looked both private and disposable, but I still wouldn't trust TOR in
general

>>>>>> setting up various secured, wholly anon accounts of
>>>>>> various aged, various sex, various race identities to
>>>>>> attract whatever you desire's pretty much a snap these
>>>>>> days
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I must have 200+ 'hard-luck' identities siphoning millions
>>>>>> in donations right into an anonymous secured off-shore
>>>>>> debit card account that I can remotely manage from any
>>>>>> number of yachts I have scattered in different WiFi-enabled
>>>>>> marinas around six of the seven continents
>>>>>
>>>>> Too many fudgesicles in number seven?
>>>>
>>>> assuming we can get 'em cargo-barged out there.. _way_ too
>>>> many
>>>
>>> Should dual purpose rocket launches. I'm sure the fireball of a
>>> launch would incinerate 1000 or so. Not a complete solution, but
>>> it would be a start.
>>
>> I liked Moonraker, too.. they should've shown a successful
>> rendering of that with a bunch of other victims before letting Bond
>> inevitably escape
>
> Y'know, I never thought of that. I have the hots for Jaws' big
> titted blonde, too.

they could've made millions on the adult version -- 'Cervixraker' or
some such, especially with Jaws workin' the teeth on her shaved sweaty clam

Ṃᴆ

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Aug 12, 2019, 7:18:48 AM8/12/19
to
On 8/1/2019 7:04 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 22:46:23 -0600, ??
> Yeah, it was mostly dead when I found it.

history-wise, it's showing 50,000 more posts than in atj since 2003

ttytt ..I just googled his ass.. didn't know a damn thing about him

<blocking awl to eye>

guess I might try picking up one of his books some time

Ṃᴆ

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Aug 12, 2019, 7:21:28 AM8/12/19
to
On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 22:47:08 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>> some glitch in Agent?
>>>
>>> I posted a batch of messages and when they were gone, a bunch
>>> reappeared in the outbox. Send them and some show up again.
>>> Send again. Now you know the whole ugly truth.
>>
>> had the same happen to a whole batch almost two decades ago
>>
>> thankfully, we were all in the middle of coming up with new 9/11
>> jokes for anyone to notice or care
>>
>> think I had three or four originals posted before the second tower
>> collapsed
>
> Good _can_ come from disaster!

yawp.. pretty sure the El Paso and Dayton, OH slaughters've notched up
Trump's approval rating a few points

Ṃᴆ

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Aug 12, 2019, 7:22:29 AM8/12/19
to
On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 22:48:51 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>> always wanted to pit a successful gang/cartel against another
>>>> in such a manner that they almost completely wipe each other
>>>> out at a location away from their cash hoards and grab the cash
>>>> while the police are still fumbling about at the kill scene
>>>
>>> You'd need a couple semis and drivers, but I suppose they could
>>> easily be disposed.
>>
>> there's so many billions of dollars inside the walls of these
>> cartel leaders' mansions, the problem would be airlifting the
>> physical weight of the cash out of the country
>>
>> semis wouldn't work without a battalion of tanks escorting them
>> out, and even that's assuming a shitload of air support
>
> A couple flying cranes, some Apache and Cobra close in support, and
> F35's up high and you'd have it knocked. Ain't like you wouldn't be
> able to afford the troops and hardware. Take out half a dozen and
> buy your own country.

the key's hiring enough to get the money out balanced with the number of
causalities leaving just the truck driver barely alive at the end,
meaning no witnesses left once he's capped

Ṃᴆ

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Aug 12, 2019, 7:22:59 AM8/12/19
to
On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 22:49:53 -0600, ??
> You need to learn the secret to riches. Get paid in cash, declare
> ten percent of what you get on your 1040. That has the added
> advantage of putting your known income low enough to make you
> eligible for welfare benefits.

mine's tied up in real estate -- mainly rehabs flipped to owner-financed
and some wholesale deals, but the latest project's a 60-unit apartment
syndication -- all of which I've sunk none of my own money

on houses, I look forward to foreclosing on deadbeats and selling to
other deadbeats, mainly drug dealers, whom I let get within a few months
of paying off the property before having the cops raid their home so I
can replace 'em with another

a nice bonus is quietly breaking into the house with my master key at
3am to grab their car keys (assuming they've got a $40,000+ vehicle) and
calling the cops to raid the house as I drive their car to the chop shop

Ṃᴆ

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Aug 20, 2019, 6:14:43 AM8/20/19
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On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 22:50:51 -0600, ??
> Add anal and see if they explode.

always wanted to try that while she's taking three strapped-to-a-piston
cucumbers in the vajayjay


Ṃᴆ

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Aug 20, 2019, 6:15:10 AM8/20/19
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On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 22:49:23 -0600, ??
> Was she in "Enema Twister?"

that the adult equivalent to "Gone With the Wind"?

she's already packed on a few pounds and will fade into obscurity after
another 6 months or so

tough for any of these girls to make it big these days unless they can
keep the weight under 80lbs, have the stamina of a Mary Lou Retton, and
a goldfish-looking mouth that can still wrap around a 10-inch diameter cock


Ṃᴆ

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Sep 20, 2019, 6:25:06 AM9/20/19
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On 8/17/2019 8:27 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 12 Aug 2019 05:21:28 -0600, ??
> I don't know where the anti-gunners keep finding those dipshits.
> Wonder what they promise 'em, it's gotta be good.

prolly takes nothing more than putting 'em into witness protection in
Orlando with a lifetime pass to Disney & Universal Studios


Ṃᴆ

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Sep 23, 2019, 9:25:34 AM9/23/19
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On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 23:03:53 -0600, ??
> Hah! Yep. And pig/slut combo turn out a Nancy or Elizabeth.

hyena/slut = Hillary

walrus/slut = Michael Moore

flamingo/slut = Michael Jackson

Bengal tiger/slut = Trump

goat/slut = Biden

Ṃᴆ

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Sep 23, 2019, 9:28:20 AM9/23/19
to
On 8/1/2019 7:09 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 19 Jul 2019 23:11:33 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>>> One HOSTS file does, too. If TAILS was anywhere near
>>>>>>> solid beta, I'd probably give it a shot.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> <checking>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> apparently used on a memory stick for TOR-browsing the
>>>>>> 'dark net', aka, kp shit
>>>>>
>>>>> Only more like a TOR based OS rather than just a browser.
>>>>
>>>> from the little I saw, there's stable versions already
>>>> available
>>>
>>> I haven't checked it for a long time, but it sounded to me like
>>> it's what an OS _should_ be - PRIVATE! Woulda been cool based on
>>> BeOS or maybe Plan 9, though.
>>
>> looked both private and disposable, but I still wouldn't trust TOR
>> in general
>
> <shrug> Cyber criminals seem to trust it, and I'm not hearing much
> any of them getting caught, so it must be good for something.

they must be getting caught.. nuclear, radiological, chemical, and
biological WMD prices are out of control while supplies have vaporized
..since when has buying more than 4 ounces of rocket propellant become a
"crime"?!

>>>>> Should dual purpose rocket launches. I'm sure the fireball
>>>>> of a launch would incinerate 1000 or so. Not a complete
>>>>> solution, but it would be a start.
>>>>
>>>> I liked Moonraker, too.. they should've shown a successful
>>>> rendering of that with a bunch of other victims before letting
>>>> Bond inevitably escape
>>>
>>> Y'know, I never thought of that. I have the hots for Jaws' big
>>> titted blonde, too.
>>
>> they could've made millions on the adult version -- 'Cervixraker'
>> or some such, especially with Jaws workin' the teeth on her shaved
>> sweaty clam
>
> "MoonRaper: Anal Space"

any attempt at putting a theme with an adult flick has been laughable
from day one.. we just need a description of who's nailing who in what
orifice(s) and how it finished

"350lb 6' 7" black anally impales skinny blonde 4' 2" 75lb teen and
explodes on her face"

I suppose, "Mission: Impale Anal" would get across a similar message,
but everyone's gonna be fast-forwarding through any talking or thematic
set-up to get to the good stuff


Ṃᴆ

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Oct 21, 2019, 2:03:10 AM10/21/19
to
On 8/17/2019 8:30 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 12 Aug 2019 05:22:28 -0600, ??
> But I want my army!

so keep buying 'em -- money's all yours, no witnesses, fresh army every time

what might be easier is going after the gold in India scattered
throughout their temples.. just keep holding a cow at gunpoint

Ṃᴆ

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Oct 21, 2019, 2:03:30 AM10/21/19
to
On 8/17/2019 8:30 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 12 Aug 2019 05:18:48 -0600, ??
> Elisabeth started me on Pratchett. Once I started, I couldn't get
> enough. He's good to re-read, too. He does a mix of humor and
> philosophy, and you don't realize the serious part is there until
> after you're done reading and start remembering what you've read.
> Plays with words a lot, too. Fun reading.

seeing as I just upgraded to 1,000Mb/s cable internet and an Android TV
box able to pipe in over 80,000 channels/streams from around the world
w/the ability to find new movies before their actual theatrical
release.. I'm thinkin' I'm all good


Ṃᴆ

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Oct 21, 2019, 2:04:09 AM10/21/19
to
On 8/17/2019 8:30 AM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> Explore the wonderful world of fire insurance!

helluva point.. 'specially when coupled with $10M term life policies on
the occupants

Ṃᴆ

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Oct 21, 2019, 2:04:50 AM10/21/19
to
On 8/24/2019 6:41 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 20 Aug 2019 04:15:10 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>>>> Asian women don't count in normal relationship rules..
>>>>>>>> they always end up driving their white husbands
>>>>>>>> clinically insane
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> It's the slanted cooter. Does weird things to a guy.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> if they wouldn't pixelate the shaved ones, Japs would
>>>>>> already rule the pr0n industry
>>>>>
>>>>> I dunno, their pr0n has some weird shit going on. Gotta be
>>>>> a perv freak to get off on some of it. Good for chuckles,
>>>>> though.
>>>>
>>>> it's the faces they make.. like they're being tortured and
>>>> forced to lie there against their will
>>>>
>>>> if they all learned to act like Vina Sky, Japan would become a
>>>> superpower overnight
>>>
>>> Was she in "Enema Twister?"
>>
>> that the adult equivalent to "Gone With the Wind"?
>
> Two nip chicks playing Twister, each getting a pint after so many
> turns. Loser is the one who can't hold things together, so to
> speak.

she doesn't do much gg ..too much of a cock tease

>> she's already packed on a few pounds and will fade into obscurity
>> after another 6 months or so
>>
>> tough for any of these girls to make it big these days unless they
>> can keep the weight under 80lbs, have the stamina of a Mary Lou
>> Retton, and a goldfish-looking mouth that can still wrap around a
>> 10-inch diameter cock
>
> Hey, porn gets old fast without new faces. Look at it as a positive
> thing.

hope the tattoo/body piercing thing's a passing fad.. never seen one
that's even remotely appealing


Douglas D.. Anderson

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Oct 23, 2019, 2:54:29 PM10/23/19
to
Sounds good. Spectrum provides about 1000 channels, but here in the
urban milieu I can get about 10 of these off my antenna and 20+ more
off the antenna that Spectrum doesn't provide, and considering I don't
plan on learning Spanish, Farsi, Polish, etc., or plan to watch 100
channels of High School la Crosse or backwoods "A" level baseball,
100 more channels of My Little Pony and Spongebob Squarepants, or
listening to obnoxious foreign political commentators like to Cretin
Amanpour tell us what's wrong with the United States, the whole thing
boils down to about 50 useful channels. And regarding movies, 95% of
them aren't worth watching a week after they're released, let alone
before.

ObJ: Scene in Zombieland where after getting shot, Bill Murray
apologizes for dressing up like a zombie.

Ṃᴆ

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Nov 6, 2019, 1:05:00 PM11/6/19
to
On 8/24/2019 6:41 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Tue, 20 Aug 2019 04:14:43 -0600, ??
> Wonder if you can get an elephant dick dildo.

could finally bring a smile to those 400+ pound glops of fat you see
rolling around in Walmarts


Ṃᴆ

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Nov 9, 2019, 5:47:53 AM11/9/19
to
On 9/25/2019 7:13 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Fri, 20 Sep 2019 04:25:05 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>> Good _can_ come from disaster!
>>>>
>>>> yawp.. pretty sure the El Paso and Dayton, OH slaughters've
>>>> notched up Trump's approval rating a few points
>>>
>>> I don't know where the anti-gunners keep finding those dipshits.
>>> Wonder what they promise 'em, it's gotta be good.
>>
>> prolly takes nothing more than putting 'em into witness protection
>> in Orlando with a lifetime pass to Disney & Universal Studios
>
> And all the 5.56 they want.

..along with Jacketed Hollow Point, V-MAX, and Polymer Tip

gotta be able to penetrate character costumes and baby strollers without
altering trajectory


Ṃᴆ

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Nov 10, 2019, 1:23:19 AM11/10/19
to
On 9/28/2019 9:36 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 23 Sep 2019 07:25:28 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>>>>>>> never been even remotely attracted to any bitch
>>>>>>>>>> who'd allow a horse, dog, or any non-human
>>>>>>>>>> mammal/reptile tool inside any orifice
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> 'Attracted to' isn't the same as 'laughing at.'
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> I just think it's sad, though I suppose the type of
>>>>>>>> women who'd actually do it deserve the humiliation
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> And the laughter.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> just a matter of time before one of 'em ends up preggers..
>>>>>> hopefully with a horse ..and in Alabama, so she can't abort
>>>>>> it
>>>>>
>>>>> You get a mule by breeding a horse and donkey. I wonder
>>>>> what you'd call a horse/slut combo.
>>>>
>>>> Barack
>>>
>>> Hah! Yep. And pig/slut combo turn out a Nancy or Elizabeth.
>>
>> hyena/slut = Hillary
>>
>> walrus/slut = Michael Moore
>>
>> flamingo/slut = Michael Jackson
>>
>> Bengal tiger/slut = Trump
>>
>> goat/slut = Biden
>
> Sounds like a retroactive slut sterilization program is vital.
> Maybe post-birth abortions will work.

..which they oughtta legislate up to 18 years old.. determined from the
moment they decide to become LGBT-whatever, Democrat/Progressive,
anti-gun, anti-Trump, AntiFa, anti-wall, socialist/communist,
pro-immigration, pro-black/muzzie/messican, a fuckin' Joo (the exception
being a conservative President's daughter), or anything further left
than Abraham Lincoln

Ṃᴆ

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Nov 10, 2019, 1:24:41 AM11/10/19
to
On 9/28/2019 9:36 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 23 Sep 2019 07:28:18 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

> <TAILS OS>
>>>>>
>>>>> I haven't checked it for a long time, but it sounded to me
>>>>> like it's what an OS _should_ be - PRIVATE! Woulda been cool
>>>>> based on BeOS or maybe Plan 9, though.
>>>>
>>>> looked both private and disposable, but I still wouldn't trust
>>>> TOR in general
>>>
>>> <shrug> Cyber criminals seem to trust it, and I'm not hearing
>>> much any of them getting caught, so it must be good for
>>> something.
>>
>> they must be getting caught.. nuclear, radiological, chemical, and
>> biological WMD prices are out of control while supplies have
>> vaporized ..since when has buying more than 4 ounces of rocket
>> propellant become a "crime"?!
>
> Didn't know it was. Demand is just greater than supply. There are
> a lot of pissed off Dems out there.

they're getting closer to morphing into the world's largest terrorist
network on a daily basis largely because they swallow everything the MSM
shovels

>>>>>>> Should dual purpose rocket launches. I'm sure the
>>>>>>> fireball of a launch would incinerate 1000 or so. Not a
>>>>>>> complete solution, but it would be a start.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I liked Moonraker, too.. they should've shown a successful
>>>>>> rendering of that with a bunch of other victims before
>>>>>> letting Bond inevitably escape
>>>>>
>>>>> Y'know, I never thought of that. I have the hots for Jaws'
>>>>> big titted blonde, too.
>>>>
>>>> they could've made millions on the adult version --
>>>> 'Cervixraker' or some such, especially with Jaws workin' the
>>>> teeth on her shaved sweaty clam
>>>
>>> "MoonRaper: Anal Space"
>>
>> any attempt at putting a theme with an adult flick has been
>> laughable from day one.. we just need a description of who's
>> nailing who in what orifice(s) and how it finished
>>
>> "350lb 6' 7" black anally impales skinny blonde 4' 2" 75lb teen
>> and explodes on her face"
>>
>> I suppose, "Mission: Impale Anal" would get across a similar
>> message, but everyone's gonna be fast-forwarding through any
>> talking or thematic set-up to get to the good stuff
>
> Could do "Mission: ImpregnateHer." Get that jig with the 18"
> schlong and half a dozen pre-teens. There are all kinds of creative
> eating ideas for zombie flicks, too.

"Legless Zombie Pre-teen Spinners vs. King Schlong" sounds promising


Ṃᴆ

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Nov 10, 2019, 1:25:39 AM11/10/19
to
anything newer than 2 weeks old is likely a cam capture from some nutjob
with a Canon Visio who slipped a manager a few hundred bucks to play it
after closing while the janitors are cleaning the other theaters

not a bad quality picture, but the audio has a concert hallish echo, and
the videographer who captured it later splices in some stupid ads that
roll up the screen during a few parts at the beginning of the flick

still not bad considering I can watch stuff as early as a week or two
before it's released in the US (if the stream exists, the box will find it)

the best feature (so far) is the ability to watch any episode of any TV
series all the way back to the forties (and further, I'd imagine), which
is kinda cool considering I can catch up on missed Bonanza and Big
Valley episodes after watching a whole season of 'Dexter', 'Lost',
'Criminal Minds' or "The Walking Dead"

strangely enough, I can find any episode of any of "The Apprentice"
spin-offs but not a single episode from any of the sixteen seasons of
the original

> ObJ: Scene in Zombieland where after getting shot, Bill Murray
> apologizes for dressing up like a zombie.

watched 'Zombieland: Double Tap' a week before it was released .. just a
tad bit funnier than the original but with a much higher zombie kill count

Ṃᴆ

unread,
Nov 21, 2019, 10:10:33 PM11/21/19
to
On 10/24/2019 7:29 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 21 Oct 2019 00:03:09 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>>
>> what might be easier is going after the gold in India scattered
>> throughout their temples.. just keep holding a cow at gunpoint
>
> hmm... I wonder is McDonald's has many franchises in Bombay...

they'd just have to switch to rat, dog, and horse meat, exclusively


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Nov 21, 2019, 10:10:48 PM11/21/19
to
On 10/24/2019 7:29 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 21 Oct 2019 00:03:29 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:
>>
>> seeing as I just upgraded to 1,000Mb/s cable internet and an
>> Android TV box able to pipe in over 80,000 channels/streams from
>> around the world w/the ability to find new movies before their
>> actual theatrical release.. I'm thinkin' I'm all good
>
> 80,000 channels and there's nothing on. I haven't watched anything
> except 'Mr Pickle' for a couple weeks.

that an adult version of 'Mr. Pickles'?


Ṃᴆ

unread,
Nov 21, 2019, 10:11:08 PM11/21/19
to
On 10/24/2019 7:29 PM, i.m....@aol.com wrote:

> On Mon, 21 Oct 2019 00:04:08 -0600, ??
> <mAd...@pNeUmAtIcFlAtRiVeTjAcKhAmMeR.cOm> wrote:

>>>>> You need to learn the secret to riches. Get paid in cash,
>>>>> declare ten percent of what you get on your 1040. That has
>>>>> the added advantage of putting your known income low enough
>>>>> to make you eligible for welfare benefits.
>>>>
>>>> mine's tied up in real estate -- mainly rehabs flipped to
>>>> owner-financed and some wholesale deals, but the latest
>>>> project's a 60-unit apartment syndication -- all of which I've
>>>> sunk none of my own money
>>>>
>>>> on houses, I look forward to foreclosing on deadbeats and
>>>> selling to other deadbeats, mainly drug dealers, whom I let get
>>>> within a few months of paying off the property before having
>>>> the cops raid their home so I can replace 'em with another
>>>>
>>>> a nice bonus is quietly breaking into the house with my master
>>>> key at 3am to grab their car keys (assuming they've got a
>>>> $40,000+ vehicle) and calling the cops to raid the house as I
>>>> drive their car to the chop shop
>>>
>>> Explore the wonderful world of fire insurance!
>>
>> helluva point.. 'specially when coupled with $10M term life
>> policies on the occupants
>
> Then all ya gotta do is announce an urban renewal project. Hit the
> kickback gravy train.

can't think of a better use for government money


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