off; their hearts they
think are grown harder, and by this means their fears of perishing
greatly increase. But though they are disappointed, they renew their
attempts again and again; and still as their attempts are multiplied, so
are their disappointments. All fails, they see no token of having
inclined God's heart to them, they do not see that He hears their
prayers at all, as they expected He would; and sometimes there have been
great temptations arising hence to leave off seeking, and to yield up
the case. But as they are still more terrified with fears of perishing,
and their former hopes of prevailing on God to be merciful to them in a
great measure fail, sometimes their religious affections have turned
into heart risings against God, because He will not pity them, and seems
to have little regard to their distress, and piteous cries, and to all
the pains they take. They think of the mercy God has shown to others;
how soon and how easily others have obtained comfort, and those too who
were worse than they, and have not labored so much as they have done;
and sometimes they have had even dreadful blasphemous thoughts, in these
circumstances.
But when they reflect on these wicked workings of heart against God-if
their convictions are continued, and the Spirit of God is not provoked
utterly to forsake them-they have more distressing apprehensions of the
anger of God towards those whose hearts work after such a sinful manner
about Him; a