software functionality

[hymie!]

It is amazing how many people are under the impression that the primary
purpose of a spreadsheet, such as Microsoft Excel, is to "align my
data into perfect columns".

Case in point number 1:

(Backstory -- I am upstairs watching TV)

My wife is creating a budget. She types "$ 250.00(hard return)per person"
in column B, "19 people" in column C, calls out "hymie, what's 250 times
19?" I think for a couple of seconds and answer "4750," and she types
"$ 4750.00 total" into column D.

Case in point number 2:

My wife is creating an attendance sheet of names and dates.
She types "3/15" in column B, "3/22" in column C, and "3/29" in column D.
She forgets how many days are in March and types "4/6" in column E
and "4/13" in column F. I point out that Excel will do that for you,
and will even do it correctly; and she says "That's too complicated.
This way is easier."

This is always the point where I walk away.

I mean, do these people not know the underlying verb from which we get
the word "computer" ?

--hymie! http://nasalinux.net/~hymie hy...@nasalinux.net

[The Horny Goat]

Great story! I once had my mother ask me for help so being a good son
I did. Turned out to be a loose cable that was only partly out but was
still in the socket. Took about 10 minutes to figure out the problem
and 10 minutes more to explain to her what had happened and what to do
about it next time. Then finished with 'so what's the first thing
you're going to do next time you have this problem?' 'Call you!"

[Jay E. Morris]

On 4/16/2020 9:49 AM, hymie! wrote:
> It is amazing how many people are under the impression that the primary
> purpose of a spreadsheet, such as Microsoft Excel, is to "align my
> data into perfect columns".
>
> Case in point number 1:
>
> (Backstory -- I am upstairs watching TV)
>
> My wife is creating a budget. She types "$ 250.00(hard return)per person"
> in column B, "19 people" in column C, calls out "hymie, what's 250 times
> 19?" I think for a couple of seconds and answer "4750," and she types
> "$ 4750.00 total" into column D.
>

Oh, yeah. I'm running the computer for someone's presentation because
the conference room setup sucks. There is a spreadsheet up and someone
asks how things look if a certain factor changes so I type in the new
value. Nothing else changes.

[Chris Adams]

Once upon a time, hymie! <hy...@nasalinux.net> said:
>It is amazing how many people are under the impression that the primary
>purpose of a spreadsheet, such as Microsoft Excel, is to "align my
>data into perfect columns".

And there's the other end of the spectrum, people who think that Excel
is a database program.
--
Chris Adams <cma...@cmadams.net>

[David Cameron Staples]

On Thu, 16 Apr 2020 14:49:42 +0000, hymie! wrote:

> I mean, do these people not know the underlying verb from which we get
> the word "computer" ?

Of course they do.

Historically, it means "person who grinds through tedious calculations",
so she's identified the computer here: it's you.

[Wojciech Derechowski]

On Sun, 19 Apr 2020 10:59:03 +0000, Satya wrote:
> [...]
> (One of the sheep in this pasture is black on one side.)
>
> BoNFE: Qevirf zr ahgf jura crbcyr trarenyvmr sebz vafhssvpvrag qngn.

All right, all right: one of the sheep in this pasture is black on
at least one side[0].

WD

[0] Apart from continuum many exceptions of such things as Moebius strips
and Kline bottles almost everything has at least two sides.

--
Who is Entscheidungs and what is his problem?

[Jay E. Morris]

On 4/19/2020 5:59 AM, Satya wrote:

> On Thu, 16 Apr 2020 12:04:03 -0500, Jay E. Morris wrote:
>> On 4/16/2020 9:49 AM, hymie! wrote:
>>> My wife is creating a budget. She types "$ 250.00(hard return)per person"
>>> in column B, "19 people" in column C, calls out "hymie, what's 250 times
>>> 19?" I think for a couple of seconds and answer "4750," and she types
>>> "$ 4750.00 total" into column D.

>> the conference room setup sucks. There is a spreadsheet up and someone
>> asks how things look if a certain factor changes so I type in the new
>> value. Nothing else changes.
>

> Clearly that factor has no effect on the outcome, at least with that change.

>
> (One of the sheep in this pasture is black on one side.)
>
> BoNFE: Qevirf zr ahgf jura crbcyr trarenyvmr sebz vafhssvpvrag qngn.
>

> On a related note, I use a spreadsheet to calculate my taxes -- and to
> double-check what I put into the online tax prep thingy.
>

Suppose I could have gone on and on about all the changes that should
have happened but I thought this group would be beyond that need.

[Wojciech Derechowski]

On Sat, 18 Apr 2020 02:12:15 +0000, David Cameron Staples wrote:
[...]

> so she's identified the computer here: it's you.

That could have been the outcome of my attempt to explain deterministic
languages to my wife who studied French. When I mentioned instantaneous
descriptions she laughed in my face.

WD

[The Horny Goat]

On Sun, 19 Apr 2020 10:59:03 -0000 (UTC), Satya
<sat...@satyaonline.cjb.net> wrote:

>On Thu, 16 Apr 2020 12:04:03 -0500, Jay E. Morris wrote:

>> On 4/16/2020 9:49 AM, hymie! wrote:
>>> My wife is creating a budget. She types "$ 250.00(hard return)per person"
>>> in column B, "19 people" in column C, calls out "hymie, what's 250 times
>>> 19?" I think for a couple of seconds and answer "4750," and she types
>>> "$ 4750.00 total" into column D.

>> the conference room setup sucks. There is a spreadsheet up and someone
>> asks how things look if a certain factor changes so I type in the new
>> value. Nothing else changes.
>

>Clearly that factor has no effect on the outcome, at least with that change.
>
>(One of the sheep in this pasture is black on one side.)
>
>BoNFE: Qevirf zr ahgf jura crbcyr trarenyvmr sebz vafhssvpvrag qngn.
>
>On a related note, I use a spreadsheet to calculate my taxes -- and to
>double-check what I put into the online tax prep thingy.

I think the point of the story is that the pointy-haired bastard who
created the 'spreadsheet' entered the data as text rather than numbers
which prevented recalculation (which of course is one of the points of
doing spreadsheets in the first place)

[Robert Pluim]

>>>>> On Tue, 21 Apr 2020 06:24:02 -0700, The Horny Goat <lcr...@home.ca> said:

The Horny Goat> I think the point of the story is that the pointy-haired bastard who
The Horny Goat> created the 'spreadsheet' entered the data as text rather than numbers
The Horny Goat> which prevented recalculation (which of course is one of the points of
The Horny Goat> doing spreadsheets in the first place)

I thought the point of spreadsheets was to hide the details of your
calculations so that 10 years of damaging and misguided economic
policies could be based on them even though you'd made fundamental
mistakes in your arithmetic? Or am I being cynical again?

[The Horny Goat]

On Tue, 21 Apr 2020 16:09:56 +0200, Robert Pluim <rpl...@gmail.com>
wrote:

Too true. In my laughter I momentarily forgot the lessons of the
Sainted Bastard Operator From Hell I learned two decades ago.