9 Months, Still Learning
Black Sheep
folks who have lost long term quits and are back to get it right. They
either succumbed to the just one syndrome, or their determination got worn
down by the strength of their addiction, or a personal trigger (like bitter
disappointment, excessive demands at home or work, partying with smoking
friends, anger, grief, etc.) snuck up on them and they were not sufficiently
prepared to fight it off. They all regret losing their quit and sooner or
later most of them start again.
I admire their perseverance and courage. I am not at all sure that I would
be able to start over. I think that's the main reason I am still here
today. It's certainly not because I'm better or smarter or more determined
than they are.
Just one week ago on August 15th I came closer to saying "Screw this" and
smoking than I have during the previous 8M 3W and 2D. That I am posting 9M
today is due to an incredible stroke of luck.
Everyone has at least one hard-to-cope-with trigger. For me this trigger is
anger. Not little daily irritations and frustrations or run of the mill
gits - real sputtering shaking seeing red blood boiling pulse pounding
spitting fire MAD. Doesn't happen very often, but won't respond to counting
to 10 or deep breathing. I NEED a cigarette before I say or do something
unforgivable.
I am one of those who still keeps some cigarettes in my desk drawer to thumb
my nose at. Better have one.
But that'll mean all of them won't it? and then more?
Probably, but I have to.
No.
Yes.
(Imagine a screenful of No. Yes.)
They're all dried out and would taste terrible.
Don't care, gotta have one.
Mustn't.
Need one.
Cope.
Can't.
Opened the drawer, there they are still in the box all bedraggled from being
carried everywhere with me all that first nightmare month.
And there are the last few patches that I'd saved for an emergency that
never happened. No use, they take too long to kick in.
But here also is that years old Nicorette gum. It never did work for me.
Well it would be nicotine right now - I'll give it a try.
I don't believe it helped at all, but the time spent chewing let me regain
my equilibrium. Gave me time to remember that I have to quit smoking, and
having a cigarette is not the way. That I am proud of this meter. That
even though I don't post much I care about this group and the people who
have helped me get here. And that we've also had visits and kind words from
quite a few long term quitters lately, so yes it is possible.
If you are certain there's no way you'd ever smoke another cigarette under
any circumstances, I congratulate (and envy) you. I urge the rest of the
all too error prone to have a plan in place in case.
Be careful. Be very careful.
Dawn
Nine months, 6 minutes and 17 seconds. 8190 cigarettes not smoked, saving
$2,157.45. Life saved: 4 weeks, 10 hours, 30 minutes.
Brenda
Bren
Three weeks, 12 hours, 16 minutes and 27 seconds. 322 cigarettes not smoked,
saving $46.30. Life saved: 1 day, 2 hours, 50 minutes.
"Black Sheep" <da...@bcsupernet.com> wrote in message
news:7LKo5.711$ZU2....@news-west.usenetserver.com...
padders
inspirational post.
C~O~N~G~R~A~T~U~L~A~T~I~O~N~S
on your M M M M M M M M Ms Dawn WTG!
padders (şżş)
CC
cigarette and thanks for encouraging me!!!
If I make it through today......I can make it through tomorrow.
CC - 13 hours, 42 minutes and 44 seconds. 14 cigarettes not smoked,
saving $1.43. Life saved: 1 hour, 10 minutes.
--
Flower Power, CC Shuett
http://www.4friendsflowerfarm.com
flo...@4friendsflowerfarm.com
Yorkies Rule, Cassee
http://www.geocities.com/Petsburgh/Farm/6466
cca...@mindspring.com
snowtree
congratulations, girl!!! ive been watching for your post the last few
days. 3/4 done to OF, YAY.
thank you for your timely warning. i have been a bit disheartened by
the amount of returnees, but you are right, it is a lesson for
everybody. it dosent matter how much time has passed, you have to be
on your guard. someday i hope to live far from a 24 hour convenience
store <g>
thank you for your help, Mother Hen :) is it time for you to throw
out the crumpled dried out ones in the drawer yet? Sachet du Marlboro,
perhaps? i would be pleased to send ya some lemon verbena from my
garden in its place.
snowtree
One month, four weeks, one day, 7 hours, 54 minutes and 45 seconds.
1779 cigarettes not smoked, saving $311.48.
Sally
>snowtree
>
>
>One month, four weeks, one day, 7 hours, 54 minutes and 45 seconds.
>1779 cigarettes not smoked, saving $311.48.
>
>
Ain't that a pretty site or what??!! You go, girl!!!
Sally (who misses her quit buddies)
1M4W2D5H
Shelly Davies
Congratulations on 9M....
Shelly
5M
Marilyn Matte
[snip]
That's a wonderful piece of writing there, Dawn. Congratulations
on working your way through to this milestone.
I'm so glad you're with me on this journey. I'm happy for you in
your achievement and proud *of* you.
Good work!
*hugs*
mmm
9.75M
--
"I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home,
which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls
every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes
home late at night." -*- Marie Corelli
Katie
do I hear you about being careful!!
Katie
Eight months, four days, 9 hours, 14 minutes and 25 seconds. 9935 cigarettes
not smoked, saving $1,241.72. Life saved: 4 weeks, 6 days, 11 hours, 55
minutes.
<b><font color="#0000FF">~*~Katie~*~</font color>
<font color="#FF0000">"Never let your memories be greater than your dreams."
-- Doug Ivester </b></font color>
Jeff T. Taylor
Bob Flemming
nothing like milestone superficiality. What we have here is a bit of
truthful realism about what's really going on with you even after 9
months. It's often been suggested that to voice such insecurities
after a period of being quit may have a dis-encouraging effect on
newbies, but I don't agree. It's a case of tell it like it really is.
I bet you're not the only one who is still learning after 9 months.
bobf
5m
Tammy Mcniff
good on ya for fighting back and winning the battle. This
is a truly courageous post, I'm certain you've helped a number
of people today. Just goes to show how important it is to
know the enemy (trigger). And for me, it always helped to
try to pre-plan my responses to triggers, altho I realize
that's not always possible.
Warm congratulations on your achievement, Dawn.
Tammy
11months3weeks+
sherry9999
"Black Sheep" <da...@bcsupernet.com> wrote:
>
> Be careful. Be very careful.
>
> Dawn
> Nine months, 6 minutes and 17 seconds. 8190 cigarettes not smoked,
saving
> $2,157.45. Life saved: 4 weeks, 10 hours, 30 minutes.
>
>
Hooray, my victorious quit buddy!! It is a struggle, sometimes easier
than others. But never as hard as at the beginning. I, like you, don't
know if I could ever do it again.
BUT... it is nice driving with people and not having to worry. Staying
with people and not having to worry. Going to a hotel or cafe and not
having to worry. My reasons to quit list is still in my purse. I may
pull it out and add to it. It is true that everyday I find more reasons
I am glad I quit, and no reasons to be wishing I was smoking.
If it only didn't tug at our sleeves......
Congratulations.
sherry
9m
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Flying Fitch
And that is a great post. Thanks for the food for thought.
Kate W.
10M
homealan
Erudite and to the point as usual and as expected
I value your posts and I take great pleasure in saying Heart Felt
Congratulations on your 9 Months .
Please make OF I need someone to show me the way :-)
Regards
Alan
"Black Sheep" <da...@bcsupernet.com> wrote in message
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Bald Eagle
I am The Bald Eagle
Alan
"homealan" <home...@ntlworld.com> wrote in message
news:jvWo5.1972$tl4....@news2-win.server.ntlworld.com...
Moocher
Congratulations on your Brilliantly Achieved Nine Months!!!! Three quarters
OF. Criminy - the dizzy heights we're reaching - ain't it grand?
I do hope that whatever it was that made you that mad now knows its place.
Should it try to make you that mad again you just send it around here and
Fred and me will sort it for you - in fact, all you have to do, probably, is
simply threaten it with this grizly fate and it'll probably just reduce
itself to a grease spot on the pavement and trouble you no more. Ok?
Take care,
SusanandFredninemonthsish
Sassy She-Spock
"Black Sheep" <da...@bcsupernet.com> wrote in message
news:7LKo5.711$ZU2....@news-west.usenetserver.com...
>
> Nine months, 6 minutes and 17 seconds. 8190 cigarettes not smoked,
saving
> $2,157.45. Life saved: 4 weeks, 10 hours, 30 minutes.
Yeah baby! Onwards, always onwards. Shit, look at all that money.
Congratulations! Great post, too.
Sassy She-Spock,
Boldly Going Nowhere
9M+
Moocher
Cracking up faster than usual - that's why I forgot. Sorry.
Great Post!!! Very wise!!
SusanandFredninemonthsish
Moocher <moo...@bristol-9241710.freeserve.co.uk> wrote in message
news:8o1ep8$hhr$1...@news5.svr.pol.co.uk...
> Hello Dawn
>
> Congratulations on your Brilliantly Achieved Nine Months!!!! Three
quarters
> OF. Criminy - the dizzy heights we're reaching - ain't it grand?
>
> I do hope that whatever it was that made you that mad now knows its place.
> Should it try to make you that mad again you just send it around here and
> Fred and me will sort it for you - in fact, all you have to do, probably,
is
> simply threaten it with this grizly fate and it'll probably just reduce
> itself to a grease spot on the pavement and trouble you no more. Ok?
>
> Take care,
> SusanandFredninemonthsish
> Black Sheep <da...@bcsupernet.com> wrote in message
> news:7LKo5.711$ZU2....@news-west.usenetserver.com...
Klaus Werner
those clever tobacco company executives earning fat salaries - most of them
of course non-smokers!
Klaus
Stepper
the entire time I've been here. Congratulations on 9M,
it's great to see it on you!
Stepper
7m
Black Sheep
"Brenda" <bstr...@rrrr.com> wrote in message
news:LJNo5.21401$Fi.1...@typhoon.neo.rr.com...
> Wow Dawn =( Congrats on getting past that moment! =)
>
hide from R&P Rosie :-))
Dawn
9M yes indeedy
Black Sheep
although I know those words are wanted and welcomed by the people they're
addressed to. So I usually leave that to others like yourself who are good
at it, but I try to include a hopefully helpful lesson with my milestone
posts.
Dawn
9M it is pretty isn't it?
Black Sheep
Whatever works for you is the best method Klaus. Just don't underestimate
the power of the unexpected trigger. Be prepared.
Dawn
9M
Black Sheep
Thanks CC. It makes you humble to discover that you're still so vulnerable
after so long. This group really does give you strength you would never
have had by yourself.
Dawn
9 M
Black Sheep
to you soon.
Dawn
9M Yes 9!
Black Sheep
group to draw strength from.
Dawn
9 M
Black Sheep
was way past that kind of problem.
Dawn
9 M by the skin of my teeth
Black Sheep
you makes the time pass much more pleasantly.
Dawn
MMMMMMMMM had to do that once.:-))
Black Sheep
Dawn
9 M
Black Sheep
that day. Even in the middle of the maelstrom I was aware that this was
"normal", that it had happened to others, that they had survived it and I
could too. Thank goodness it doesn't happen every day though, it's very
hard on the blood pressure!
Dawn
9 M and getting smarter, that one can't get me again.
Black Sheep
look possible that I'll be joining you! I've been trying to think of a
response just in case there's a next time. So far it's a double fudge
chocolate sundae and burning (and inhaling) incense!
Dawn
9M
Black Sheep
doesn't have to stick it's foot out and trip me like that!
Dawn
9M
Black Sheep
Thanks Kate. It is a pleasure to have you breaking the trail.
Dawn
9M
Black Sheep
Ah Susan, no irritant could withstand the dynamic duo of youandFred!
Knowing I have you in my corner makes me invincible! Thank you .
Dawn
9M do you see that? 9M and no one's taking that away from me!
Black Sheep
no fear, I may stumble a bit, but I intend to stay on the trail. I'm glad
you're tagging along. Knowing that what I do matters to others gives me
strength when I face a rough day.
Dawn
9M
Black Sheep
cigs were (and still are) very expensive in B.C. I guess I cheated a bit
and used the average single pack price when setting up my meter. Actually I
bought cartons, (and I refuse to tell where).
Dawn
9M This is a nice one eh?
Black Sheep
do what feels right to you. And if what feels right changes, don't be
afraid to change what you do.
Dawn
9M in spite of it.
Black Sheep
solid source of support for many who are following. Scary isn't it? :-))
Dawn
9 M
Black Sheep
who have successfully defeated a major trigger. They don't seem to realise
what a wonderful thing they have done. Perhaps they are still in full fight
mode, and that carries them to victory. It is so hard to believe the
strength of the desire to smoke when something knocks your feet out from
under you. Now I really do understand how easily a long quit can be lost,
and how lucky I was.
Dawn
9 M
Sally
>If you are certain there's no way you'd ever smoke another cigarette under
>any circumstances, I congratulate (and envy) you. I urge the rest of the
>all too error prone to have a plan in place in case.
>
>
Thank you sooooo much for posting this message, Dawn.....GREAT
timing!!
Sally
One month, four weeks, two days, 18 hours, 25 minutes and 35 seconds.
1823 stinking cigs not smoked, saving a whopping $273.45 for
chocolate. Life saved: 6 days, 7 hours, 55 minutes.
Mel (woman)
Congratulations on your 9 Months !
Thank you for this post also.... feeling a bit shakey tonight and this post
was a
great reminder what happened to me and why I don't want to do it again...
CONGRATULATIONS Again!
Mel
MM
> If you are certain there's no way you'd ever smoke another cigarette under
> any circumstances, I congratulate (and envy) you. I urge the rest of the
> all too error prone to have a plan in place in case.
>
> Be careful. Be very careful.
>
Gwen Watson
A BIG CONGRATULATIONS on getting 9 months.
Totally awesome. Drums rolling for a true spirited
winner! The champagne is on ice and the hot
tubs are getting heated!
Great, inspirational post, thanks so
much. I couldn't agree more
with every word you wrote. In fact this is
a real keeper for me. I have the same anger
trigger, seeing blood and all. This is the trigger
I am most worried about. I have definately dealt
with grief to the max over this past 6 weeks.
Gwen
5m
THIS@arenastage.org Jef.
"Black Sheep" wrote
> > Nine months, 6 minutes and 17 seconds. 8190 cigarettes not smoked,
saving
> $2,157.45. Life saved: 4 weeks, 10 hours, 30 minutes.
Oh, my God.... can this be true?
Then...then...that means..... Oh my God.......
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! Be proud; be very proud!
JEF.
8 months, 4 weeks, 1 day, 23 hours, 15 minutes
My God; I haven't smoked 13,647 cigarettes!
And I've saved $2,388.23!
"It is not necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice.
There are two other possibilities: one is paper work, and the other is
nostalgia."
liz
You have done so terrifically well - to keep going when the triggers are
strong and you are having a hard time is admirable. The nicodemon can't
resist havin a go when it senses you are low, but it has nothing to offer
that will make you feel better or change the situation. Keep in toufh here
for suport, a rant or whatever, and look after yourself first and foremost.
Best wishes,
Liz
One month, one week, one day, 19 hours, 26 minutes and 51 seconds. 796
cigarettes not smoked, saving £155.26. Life saved: 2 days, 18 hours, 20
minutes.
sherry9999
Lookie!! Lookie!!!
Dawn and I are a whole month in front of you.
sherry
9m (and you're not)
In article <n9ap5.1397$Dx1.3...@news.abs.net>,
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Black Sheep
differently under different circumstances. Just knowing it can happen, and
still be a normal part of a successful quit, makes it possible to survive.
Dawn
9 M and you can too
Black Sheep
Damn straight it's true.
> Then...then...that means
Yes - it's your turn next! :-))
Dawn
9M Nyeh, nyeh, I'm at 9 and you're not.
Black Sheep
close to being a disaster that I wanted to warn eager idealistic cheerful
quitters that this sort of thing can happen, and you can survive it.
Dawn
9 M