Meeting people non-naturally
Brent Dunn
In a previous article, ja...@mail.utexas.edu (John McNutt) says:
>But from one of your earlier posts, are parties the better medium for someone
>like you to meet people? Perhaps you should consider joining some clubs or
>organizations which deals with something that you are interested in. Then
>when it comes to conversations, the subject is already defined.
Yes, you're right...parties and related thing (nightclubs, etc) are not the
best area for me. And I really stay away from a lot of them. I prefer to
meet people in situations where we are already together for some reason --
school, work, some other organization -- then, as you say, the common
ground is there. I think of it as meeting people naturally, and parties,
etc. are, to me, "non-natural" ways to meet people (at least for me -- I
realize that for others it's perfectly natural)
Right now most of the people I meet and get to know are through my
church...recently I've become a bit more involved and got myself into a
position where I'm working closely with a small group of people and have
to have at least casual contact with a number of others.
But I still attend parties, etc. because as I meet people naturally, they
invite me to these things, and I go either out of politeness or to have an
opportunity to spend more time with them, or both. Also they are fun, and
sometimes I *do* meet people, or get to know some people better. So while
it's not my medium of choice, I sort of choose to include it sometimes, and
so I wanted to look for a way to be a little better at that sort of thing.
I hope this made sense.
---Brent
--
en...@cleveland.freenet.edu --lives in Tucson, AZ--
--only reads things as short or long as his attention span--
(tho I generally write things longer)
Omicron
: Unfortunately, I missed an invitation for transition. Guys, if you meet a
Transition? sounds like a particularly nasty automotive problem.
: woman and she says, "I have to leave," that isn't necessarily a dismissal.
: The correct response is ALWAYS "May I walk you to your car/the subway
: station/whatever?" I screwed up on this, and my only excuse was that I
: only had known of the transition for a couple of days.
Definition: Transition: walking/accompanying person to their destination?
correct?
: I find walking up to women in pubs to be much more difficult.
I have met new people at parties a couple of times (the trouble is that the
partiesI frequent have all the same people all the time.. need new parties)
one I became solid friends with.. the closest friendship I have ever had.
(but she was engaged and now married damnit all), the second time I was
having an interesting conversation with someone inbetween attacks of their
boyfriend.
oh well, maybe next time.
Jason
--
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Omicron
: Right now most of the people I meet and get to know are through my
: church...recently I've become a bit more involved and got myself into a
: position where I'm working closely with a small group of people and have
: to have at least casual contact with a number of others.
I muust admit that once I was a member of a "bible study/ social group" for
the express purpose of meeting people...
Religion is very good if you want to meet lots of friendly people, you just
have to keep clear of the fundamentalists.
Pity I can't do that now, being an Atheist and all.
Julian Davison
Jason_...@equinox.gen.nz (Omicron) writes:
> Brent Dunn (en...@cleveland.Freenet.Edu) wrote:
>
>
> : Right now most of the people I meet and get to know are through my
> : church...recently I've become a bit more involved and got myself into a
> : position where I'm working closely with a small group of people and have
> : to have at least casual contact with a number of others.
>
> I muust admit that once I was a member of a "bible study/ social group" for
> the express purpose of meeting people...
;) If you're extremely lucky (hahah) you find someone in one of these
that decides to create a 'social club', membership cards and everything!
*giggle* He was bored apparently...
> Religion is very good if you want to meet lots of friendly people, you just
> have to keep clear of the fundamentalists.
Good advice whether you want to meet lots of friendly people or not...
> Pity I can't do that now, being an Atheist and all.
Why not?
--
Julian Davison <j.da...@csc.canterbury.ac.nz>
Courtesy is Owed
Respect is Earned
Love is Given
An' it harm none, do as thou wilt.
Eric Pepke
(Omicron) wrote:
> Definition: Transition: walking/accompanying person to their destination?
> correct?
Sorry I didn't define it. It's one stage in a model of seduction suggested
to me by my girlfriend, which model I have been trying to refine for a
couple of months now. I've been thinking about it so much I forgot the
nomenclature was idiosyncratic. If I ever get the model working properly,
I'll report on it here, as I think the formalism might help some people.
A transition is an event where two people make arrangements to go to a more
private (but still public) place to explore each other further. Walking
someone to a car or other destination is a classic transition, and it's one
of the few which has a completely safe, passive invitation ("I have to go
now") and a completely risk-free response ("May I walk you to your car?").
Other transitions may include stepping out for a breath of fresh air or to
get away from the noise, going to a quieter bar, going for a walk, etc.
Eric Pepke
Supercomputer Computations Research Institute
Florida State University
pe...@scri.fsu.edu
rohw...@netcom.com
Omicron <Jason_...@equinox.gen.nz> wrote:
>Brent Dunn (en...@cleveland.Freenet.Edu) wrote:
>
>: Right now most of the people I meet and get to know are through my
>: church...recently I've become a bit more involved and got myself into a
>: position where I'm working closely with a small group of people and have
>: to have at least casual contact with a number of others.
>
>I muust admit that once I was a member of a "bible study/ social group" for
>the express purpose of meeting people...
>Religion is very good if you want to meet lots of friendly people, you just
>have to keep clear of the fundamentalists.
>Pity I can't do that now, being an Atheist and all.
>
You could always try the Unitarian-Universalist Church. For more
information take a look at these two newsgroups: bit.listserv.uus-l and
soc.religion.unitarian-univ.
Omicron
: In article <38jivv$4...@southern.co.nz>, Jason_...@equinox.gen.nz
: (Omicron) wrote:
: > Definition: Transition: walking/accompanying person to their destination?
: > correct?
: to me by my girlfriend, which model I have been trying to refine for a
: couple of months now. I've been thinking about it so much I forgot the
: nomenclature was idiosyncratic. If I ever get the model working properly,
: I'll report on it here, as I think the formalism might help some people.
Please do, I would be very interested.
: A transition is an event where two people make arrangements to go to a more
: private (but still public) place to explore each other further. Walking
that makes sence.... I _Must_ remember that.
Thanks for the added info.