You can sew a stitch with one hand while you're taking it apart.
ubiquity
--
-ubiquity
cometz
> :/
>
> --
> -ubiquity
literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
are observing.
ubiquity
> On Nov 12, 11:28?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>> :/
>
> literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
> are observing.
Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
else.
--
-ubiquity
cometz
yes. seems to be how it works. for us part of the learning was to be
able to unravel less and stitch more. and stop for breaks when
possible.
it stinks. it hurts. is frustrating and despair making. but eventually
the balance shifts. it does. really.
ubiquity
> On Nov 12, 11:44?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>> Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
>> else.
>
> able to unravel less and stitch more. and stop for breaks when
> possible.
> it stinks. it hurts. is frustrating and despair making. but eventually
> the balance shifts. it does. really.
Even when we aren't doing anything, it's one thing after another. There
was a f*re downstairs below this apartment. They evacuated the building.
Now we have to sit here with open windows because it smells really bad
because a neighbor left his stove on and went to work. :(
--
-ubiquity
jill
Yes, one step forward, two steps back. Two steps forward and then fall
off a cliff. Yep, sounds about right :P~~
You are still at the baby steps part. Anything you do to fix you is
still at the tentative trying it out phase and the unraveling is
happening because you are disrupting the 'status quo' that you have
all lived with for so long. Not that status quo is the way to
live mind you cause it is simply surviving, not living.
Reminds me of having kids. If I breathed with it the pain was bigger
cause I was in the moment but it actually worked. If I held my
breath I could go away but then nothing happened. Given that I chose
to not be in labor for eternity I breathed *wry grin*
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
--
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The colors blend, the edges soften. Swirling and mixing
we are becoming white light.
ji...@tuells.org
jill
ACK! Try baking soda left open in boxes. It absorbs odors. It works
very well. Can also sprinkle it around like on the carpet and then let
it sit a bit and vacuum it up. Of course if the smell is still
coming up from below you will simply mask not remove the smell :P
But putting boxes of the stuff around (rip off the top so the box has
a big opening) can help surprisingly well :)
ubiquity
> In article <slrnhfpblm....@asus.zero>,
> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>Even when we aren't doing anything, it's one thing after another. There
>>was a f*re downstairs below this apartment. They evacuated the building.
>>Now we have to sit here with open windows because it smells really bad
>>because a neighbor left his stove on and went to work. :(
>
> very well. Can also sprinkle it around like on the carpet and then let
> it sit a bit and vacuum it up. Of course if the smell is still
> coming up from below you will simply mask not remove the smell :P
>
> But putting boxes of the stuff around (rip off the top so the box has
> a big opening) can help surprisingly well :)
Ok, we will try. So overwhelmed tonight. Bad week. Feel so dizzy right
now. Too much anxiety and our chest h*rts and our stomache b*rns and
head h*rts so so bad and we feel so weak.
--
-ubiquity
ubiquity
> In article <slrnhfoere....@asus.zero>,
> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>On 2009-11-12, cometz wrote...
>>> On Nov 12, 11:28?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>>> :/
>>>
>>> literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
>>> are observing.
>>
>>Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
>>else.
>
> off a cliff. Yep, sounds about right :P~~
We aren't even stepping forward right now. Just trying to not stumble
off the cliff completely, and we're withdrawing because we don't want to
latch on to anybody or anything.
> You are still at the baby steps part. Anything you do to fix you is
> still at the tentative trying it out phase and the unraveling is
> happening because you are disrupting the 'status quo' that you have
> all lived with for so long. Not that status quo is the way to
> live mind you cause it is simply surviving, not living.
I don't even know what living is!
> Reminds me of having kids. If I breathed with it the pain was bigger
> cause I was in the moment but it actually worked. If I held my
> breath I could go away but then nothing happened. Given that I chose
> to not be in labor for eternity I breathed *wry grin*
>
> Rainbow Colors (Jill)
--
-ubiquity
astri
> Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
> else.
bah :P
-- astri
======================
to email send to astri
======================
at volcano dot org
======================
confuzzled
> :/
>
regrets
confuzzled
> On 2009-11-13, jill wrote...
>> In article <slrnhfoere....@asus.zero>,
>> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>> On 2009-11-12, cometz wrote...
>>>> On Nov 12, 11:28?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>>>> :/
>>>> literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
>>>> are observing.
>>> Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
>>> else.
>> Yes, one step forward, two steps back. Two steps forward and then fall
>> off a cliff. Yep, sounds about right :P~~
>
> We aren't even stepping forward right now. Just trying to not stumble
> off the cliff completely, and we're withdrawing because we don't want to
> latch on to anybody or anything.
>
process, learning to not stumble completely off the cliff is very
important skill. pdoc t and i spent lots of sessions talking about the
cliff. we even drew pictures. I'd draw the cliff as a straight line
down. he'd draw the cliff and it wouldn't be straight down. it was at an
angle with flat spots so that if i fell i wasn't crashing all the way to
the bottom
>> You are still at the baby steps part. Anything you do to fix you is
>> still at the tentative trying it out phase and the unraveling is
>> happening because you are disrupting the 'status quo' that you have
>> all lived with for so long. Not that status quo is the way to
>> live mind you cause it is simply surviving, not living.
>
> I don't even know what living is!
>
:(
jill
ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>On 2009-11-13, jill wrote...
>> In article <slrnhfoere....@asus.zero>,
>> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>>On 2009-11-12, cometz wrote...
>>>> On Nov 12, 11:28?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>>>> :/
>>>>
>>>> literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
>>>> are observing.
>>>
>>>Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
>>>else.
>>
>> Yes, one step forward, two steps back. Two steps forward and then fall
>> off a cliff. Yep, sounds about right :P~~
>
>We aren't even stepping forward right now. Just trying to not stumble
>off the cliff completely, and we're withdrawing because we don't want to
>latch on to anybody or anything.
Yep *I sling a rope around your middle and tie you off to a stout
tree at the top of the cliff* I know that feeling both literally
(from rock climbing) and metaphorically. Just remember you are
supposed to be taking baby steps right now and keep on breathing.
>> You are still at the baby steps part. Anything you do to fix you is
>> still at the tentative trying it out phase and the unraveling is
>> happening because you are disrupting the 'status quo' that you have
>> all lived with for so long. Not that status quo is the way to
>> live mind you cause it is simply surviving, not living.
>
>I don't even know what living is!
Exactly! You are floundering around with no map or model to follow.
We (asd people) weren't taught how to live just survive. Now, as
adults, we have to figure it out as we go. Makes it really difficult.
Doable though.
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
>> Reminds me of having kids. If I breathed with it the pain was bigger
>> cause I was in the moment but it actually worked. If I held my
>> breath I could go away but then nothing happened. Given that I chose
>> to not be in labor for eternity I breathed *wry grin*
>>
>> Rainbow Colors (Jill)
>
>--
> -ubiquity
jill
confuzzled <nospamsometi...@gmail.com> wrote:
>ubiquity wrote:
>> On 2009-11-13, jill wrote...
>>> In article <slrnhfoere....@asus.zero>,
>>> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>>> On 2009-11-12, cometz wrote...
>>>>> On Nov 12, 11:28?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>>>>> :/
>>>>> literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
>>>>> are observing.
>>>> Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
>>>> else.
>>> Yes, one step forward, two steps back. Two steps forward and then fall
>>> off a cliff. Yep, sounds about right :P~~
>>
>> We aren't even stepping forward right now. Just trying to not stumble
>> off the cliff completely, and we're withdrawing because we don't want to
>> latch on to anybody or anything.
>>
>pdoc t always insisted that was actually progress. is part of the
>process, learning to not stumble completely off the cliff is very
>important skill. pdoc t and i spent lots of sessions talking about the
>cliff. we even drew pictures. I'd draw the cliff as a straight line
>down. he'd draw the cliff and it wouldn't be straight down. it was at an
>angle with flat spots so that if i fell i wasn't crashing all the way to
>the bottom
Having literally been on my share of actual in real cliffs I can tell
you that the pdoc is right. Cliffs aren't just straight down. There
are bumps and ledges and slanty bits along the way so if you were to
fall you would bounce and slide and grab onto this tree root or that
branch until you landed on a ledge a short way down. Then I would just
rappel down to you and hook you into the rope. I've had to do that for
countless pieces of climbing gear over the years. :)
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
>>> You are still at the baby steps part. Anything you do to fix you is
>>> still at the tentative trying it out phase and the unraveling is
>>> happening because you are disrupting the 'status quo' that you have
>>> all lived with for so long. Not that status quo is the way to
>>> live mind you cause it is simply surviving, not living.
>>
>> I don't even know what living is!
>>
>:(
--
ubiquity
> In article <slrnhfpls3....@asus.zero>,
> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>We aren't even stepping forward right now. Just trying to not stumble
>>off the cliff completely, and we're withdrawing because we don't want to
>>latch on to anybody or anything.
>
> Yep *I sling a rope around your middle and tie you off to a stout
> tree at the top of the cliff* I know that feeling both literally
> (from rock climbing) and metaphorically. Just remember you are
> supposed to be taking baby steps right now and keep on breathing.
Trying to.
>>I don't even know what living is!
>
> Exactly! You are floundering around with no map or model to follow.
> We (asd people) weren't taught how to live just survive. Now, as
> adults, we have to figure it out as we go. Makes it really difficult.
> Doable though.
Not fair.
--
-ubiquity
jill
Nope. Not fair at all! Makes me STOMPING mad that my childhood was
so sh*tty! Completely not fair at all that I got the wrong end of
the stick (whatever that saying means *grin*) and I come here and
vent and rant about it to get it out of my system.
Makes me really REALLY mad that my life now is 'different' from normal
because of how I was raised. I just don't know some stuff that other
people know and I have a feeling I will never know it as well as they
do. Totally NOT FAIR!!! STOMP
grr
The difference now is that I get mad at my foo and not myself. It's
not my fault they raised me badly. It's not my fault my parents were
incompetent idiots. I was just a kid and I didn't know any better but
to go along with what they told me. I don't have to be mad at myself
now because of what happened when I was a child. It wasn't my
fault.
It wasn't your fault that your childhood was the way it was either!
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
ubiquity
> Nope. Not fair at all! Makes me STOMPING mad that my childhood was
> so sh*tty! Completely not fair at all that I got the wrong end of
> the stick (whatever that saying means *grin*) and I come here and
> vent and rant about it to get it out of my system.
>
> Makes me really REALLY mad that my life now is 'different' from normal
> because of how I was raised. I just don't know some stuff that other
> people know and I have a feeling I will never know it as well as they
> do. Totally NOT FAIR!!! STOMP
>
> grr
>
> The difference now is that I get mad at my foo and not myself. It's
> not my fault they raised me badly. It's not my fault my parents were
> incompetent idiots. I was just a kid and I didn't know any better but
> to go along with what they told me. I don't have to be mad at myself
> now because of what happened when I was a child. It wasn't my
> fault.
>
> It wasn't your fault that your childhood was the way it was either!
So sad you went through that. So sad for you that you never got good
rents. Always tell the others inside, we had it good. We got to go home.
We are luckier than most.
--
-ubiquity
russiandolly
that's the kind of thing we're scared of doing
he must be feeling a little bit silly right now
russiandolly
wrote:
> ubiquity wrote:
> > On 2009-11-13, jill wrote...
> >> ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
> >>> On 2009-11-12, cometz wrote...
> >>>> On Nov 12, 11:28?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
> >>>>> :/
> >>>> literally or metaphorically? both are true, just wondering which you
> >>>> are observing.
> >>> Metaphorically. Anything we try to do to fix us unravels everything
> >>> else.
> >> Yes, one step forward, two steps back. Two steps forward and then fall
> >> off a cliff. Yep, sounds about right :P~~
>
> > We aren't even stepping forward right now. Just trying to not stumble
> > off the cliff completely, and we're withdrawing because we don't want to
> > latch on to anybody or anything.
>
> pdoc t always insisted that was actually progress. is part of the
> process, learning to not stumble completely off the cliff is very
> important skill. pdoc t and i spent lots of sessions talking about the
> cliff. we even drew pictures. I'd draw the cliff as a straight line
> down. he'd draw the cliff and it wouldn't be straight down. it was at an
> angle with flat spots so that if i fell i wasn't crashing all the way to
> the bottom
>
even trying not to stumble off the cliff is work in the right
direction, you *could* be taking a huge running jump but you're not.
hanging on in there can be d*mn hard work at times, and i think
everyone at asd knows it.
ubiquity
> On Nov 13, 12:56?am, ubiquity <ubiqu...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>> Even when we aren't doing anything, it's one thing after another. There
>> was a f*re downstairs below this apartment. They evacuated the building.
>> Now we have to sit here with open windows because it smells really bad
>> because a neighbor left his stove on and went to work. :(
>
> he must be feeling a little bit silly right now
Probably. The manager yelled at him lots, and they're going to charge
him thirty dollars an hour plus supplies to repair it. (That apartment
was just renovated a second time for him to move in.) They are not
happy. The firefighters kicked in the door and broke the frame. It will
cost him a lot.
--
-ubiquity
jill
We were lucky too. We lived through it. Supposedly that's unusual for
what happened. :P
It's not fair that you got ab*sed. It is not fair that things got
messed up for you so that your life didn't go smoothly. It is not
fair that you didn't get a good t'pist right away and get stuff
figured out sooner.
I can get STOMPING mad about the unfairness for you if it would help!
It is NOT FAIR that some people get a good childhood and others don't.
Every kid should get a good childhood! Adulthood is hard enough
without adding that to the past.
ubiquity
> In article <slrnhfs955....@asus.zero>,
> ubiquity <ubiq...@cryptobug.com> wrote:
>>So sad you went through that. So sad for you that you never got good
>>rents. Always tell the others inside, we had it good. We got to go home.
>>We are luckier than most.
>
> what happened. :P
>
> It's not fair that you got ab*sed. It is not fair that things got
> messed up for you so that your life didn't go smoothly. It is not
> fair that you didn't get a good t'pist right away and get stuff
> figured out sooner.
>
> I can get STOMPING mad about the unfairness for you if it would help!
Don't need to get mad. Doesn't matter, but thanks.
> It is NOT FAIR that some people get a good childhood and others don't.
> Every kid should get a good childhood! Adulthood is hard enough
> without adding that to the past.
Used to work at a cultured marble place, and the guy we would help
install sinks with (because two tonne double sink vanities are
impossible to carry up a flight of stairs alone) always asked everybody
about their childhoods because he liked hearing about normal families
and normal growing up. He asked us, and we almost laughed when we asked
why he was asking us that. Guess he was one of the "Lost Boys" from
Colorado City.
(For those who don't know, lost boys are young males who are banished
from p*lygamy s*cts to reduce competativeness for wives to the older
men. Is literally being thrown into the real world with nothing.)
--
-ubiquity