saner during crisis?

[Just Me]

Does anyone else feel like the playing field gets evened during a time
of broad crisis?

When the nation is panicking and freaking out about stuff, I almost feel
more normal. It's like now all the "normal" people are in "my world".

It's hard to explain, but although crisis affect me too, it's different.
I'm used to living in crisis. I don't like it, but I'm almost always in
crisis mode. Other people are not. It's odd to see so many people in a
mental state similar to or worse than mine.

Does anyone else feel like they're almost more sane during times like
these? Or better equipped to handle things (mentally) because the
outside world suddenly aligns more with "our world"?

- Does this make any sense?

[no...@gmail.com]

Op 14-3-2020 om 22:58 schreef Just Me:

It does make sence. I feel we are better equipped to handle crisis. Now
everybody is doing the headless chicken act I can only watch them and
laugh at their stupidity.
Stockpiling toiletpaper, whatever next he.
Ursus

[Just Me]

Yeah. Like that :) I know people who are so depressed and not handling
things well. And their world seems completely turned upside down. As if
nothing has ever gone wrong for them before in their lives. Even people
I know who HAVE had things go wrong in their lives! Of course I'm
affected too, but not in the same way. Maybe I'll lose my head later.
I'm sad and worried and sad mostly for all the people suffering and who
are scared and who are being mismanaged by our country and not being
taken care of well. I'm angry about that. But it's also what i expect I
guess. It's not surprising to me. It's how my life usually is, but only
with respect to me and maybe a small circle of loved ones. It's odd to
have that expanded to a larger population, but I guess it's so much more
similar to MY normal than "real life" is, that... I don't know... it's
odd.

[no...@gmail.com]

Op 21-3-2020 om 01:29 schreef Just Me:

If it wasn't that serious I would laugh at the situation. Train services
were virtually quarted, yet they were so full today with people goging
to the beach. There even was a short violent outbreak because some part
of the beach was so full that people began quarelling about 'their'
space. ff-ing morons, as if they have nothing better to do.
I walk my daily rounds with the dogs, I go outside into the empty
countryside. Straight back in. But nope, lets celebrate our extra
holidays. Meanwhile 60 more people died in our province today.

yet we know, even in these time, that we are not alone. Insiders and
outsiders.
We have gone through terrible stuff in our lives and lived. If we are
lucky we will still live after ll of this and be much tougher then
Joe-next-door.

[Just Me]

That's a lot :(

>
> yet we know, even in these time, that we are not alone. Insiders and
> outsiders.
> We have gone through terrible stuff in our lives and lived. If we are
> lucky we will still live after ll of this and be much tougher then
> Joe-next-door.

I think we're more used to isolation. To struggle and difficulty. I
think we're used to thinking creatively. I think we're used to not
having help we need. I think we're used to screaming and asking for help
and no one hearing or doing anything except saying "I'm sorry to hear
that" - if we're lucky. I think most "normal" people are not used to any
of that. So not only are they going without, for possibly the first
times in their lives, but that whole mindset is also new for them. So
there's that extra shock and anxiety too.

I have enough food right now so I know I'm ok to stay in for a couple of
weeks. But I have to go out to do laundry, or have someone else do it
for me. That makes me nervous. Public laundries are crowded. And it's
not as if people who didn't have a machine in their home before will
suddenly have one now and use public laundries less. And if someone does
it for me, then I don't have to go out, but I feel like it's kind of
like an STD. I won't just be around them, but with everyone they've been
around.

I also worry about how things will be in a couple of weeks when I need
to get more food. I hope it will be better but it might not be. But for
now, today, I'm good. - And not going to any beaches! Those people are
crazy!

[Queequeg]

Just Me <nos...@nospam.com> wrote:

> Does anyone else feel like the playing field gets evened during a time
> of broad crisis?

Yeah, totally.

I saw it today on FB:
https://www.facebook.com/brittany.wooddowns.3/posts/514840532757187

"I saw someone say that people who have anxiety arent panicking like
everyone else is, were not out here buying 10+ rolls of tp and such, do
you know why? This is our normal state. To us the world is ending, every
single day. And its interesting, watching everyone act the way our brains
think on a daily basis. It sucks doesnt it? To be in this constant state
of fear and helplessness. To feel the impending doom, but feel absolutely
powerless about it. Welcome to our world. This is our every day.
Sincerely
Everyone with severe anxiety."

--
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lSzL1DqQn0

[Queequeg]

no...@gmail.com wrote:

> It does make sence. I feel we are better equipped to handle crisis. Now
> everybody is doing the headless chicken act I can only watch them and
> laugh at their stupidity.

To be honest, I feel much better during the outbreak than I did before.
Meetings and crowded spaces trigger me, traffic jams trigger me... and now
there are few people at work (the rest works remotely, I decided to work
from the office), streets are empty, meetings (one of my triggers) are
held online (which surprisingly works much better for me), I might even
think about changing the job (remote interview might be something I'd be
able to do -- I always flashed back before face-to-face interviews), I was
planning to buy a house and it looks like prices are dropping... rental
prices are dropping too... my therapy is remote (on skype) too, which from
my dissociation point of view is much, much easier... for now it doesn't
look bad. I'm on Efectin, very slowly withdrawing it, and I might even
think on further lowering its dosage.

Yes, I'm worried about economy and what happens to my savings when
inflation kicks in, but it's a normal worry, it doesn't trigger me. I
opened another account in USD and I'm planning to transfer some of my
savings (which are in PLNs) there as soon as USD price drops.

I'm also worried about my mother (she's a doctor and with her age, smoking
and heart illnesses she's at risk of death from the virus), but now she
works remotely too (doing phone and online consultations -- her clinic is
closed now)... so I hope she'll be OK.

Fortunately, being a software developer I'm in a quite privileged
position. I can work, I can work remotely, I don't need face-to-face
contact with people to work. Some of my friends work in entertainment
industry, some were organizing events, and they're in total crisis now,
not being able to pay their bills.

One of my severe dissociative friends is very happy about this situation
too. All her external triggers went away. She's still fighting with
internal ones (flashbacks, seeing and hearing things, nightmares,
insomnia), but at least she doesn't have to go outside (which triggers her
massively).

It will be OK.

--
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lSzL1DqQn0

[Just Me]

In article <b0d3f874-70af-4ec0...@trust.no1>,

Yup! Like that! :) :)

[Just Me]

In article <d803d678-193d-4589...@trust.no1>,

I can relate to a lot of this too. And I agree. I've been thinking that
I should take morning walks when it's more empty outside. For exercise.

But what's very frustrating for me is I'm having so much trouble with
the things that have become more difficult, like finding groceries, that
it's interfering with my usual secluded-ness. I want to get back to "my
normal" which is usually being a shut-in anyway. But a lot of my time is
spent figuring out and trying to get food and laundry (done elsewhere)
and checking in with a few people. I haven't had a normal "indoors-ness"
in a while. I want to get back to that. I usually have help with these
things, but not at the moment. I don't want anyone to come here and
possibly bring the virus. So big surprise... I'm having trouble with the
very things I usually need help with - outside stuff! I'll probably have
soc svcs send someone to help soon, but I really wanted to do things
myself and avoid someone coming here (and bringing the virus with them!)

I too wanted to buy a home, but I was hoping to get help with loans from
family or the city and I think that's not going to happen any time soon.
If I had savings I agree, this could be a very good time to buy. I wish
prices could come down, while my likelihood to get a loan would go up!

[Just Me]

In article <hfm85i...@mid.individual.net>,
"a@a.a" <inv...@invalid.invalid> wrote:

> haven't been out of the house for months.
>
> OK, short walk to collect meds, wore rubber gloves
>
> shopping gets delivered...
>
> wipe down fridge freezer stuff
>
> leave everything else for at least 3 days
>
> we will survive... just not sure why we want to

Your life and routines for incoming things sounds like ours. Except we
went out in early March for food. and maybe once since then. It's very
hard for us to get shopping delivered. All slots are full. The staying
home part is not so hard for us. Not being able to get food delivered or
laundry done (outside laundromat) is making it difficult for us to
function and do other things we'd normally do indoors. That and no way
to get masks. Our leaders are stupid.

[Just Me]

In article <hgh5tq...@mid.individual.net>,

> We are lucky, our grocery supplier said we were a privileged user because we
> forget to cancel a [can't find the words] stupid ? This is hard. love you
> guys.. may not be many of us left but we are still here

Congratulations on being a 'privileged user" - even if it was accidental!

I've been out 3 times now, since March. It's still scary. Our leaders
are still stupid. I still am having difficulty with masks. Though I
found a place giving out free paper masks. which is something.
Disinfecting wipes are extremely hard to find, and when I do they're
often very overpriced.

Food is getting easier to buy. Delivery slots are more available
(finally!) Laundry is still hard, but I hope to have help with that
soon. I have over a month of laundry to do.

Any time I go out or a delivery comes in, it's still about an hour
disinfecting process. Wiping down the items, the floor, showering... I
often get tired and sloppy by the end and am probably spreading more
than I'm sanitizing. But so far we're still here and ok.

Hope everyone is managing ok.