bored
Jennifer Thomas
bored bored bored.
really, ridiculously bored.
i've been, um, getting up to no good in the last few months, and none
of it was worth talking about here.
but i've been getting myself out of it. problem is, now i'm bored.
ok, i'll talk. sheesh, jill... ;)
spoilered for talk of s*x and non-vanilla stuff
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so, like, i'm a sex addict. anyone surprised?? a *friend* *glares at
friend* *lips twitch* "suggested" that i go to a meeting, and i was
feeling d*ad enough from what i was doing that i found one and went.
fit in really, really, really well.
it's been a rough couple of months since dave left me. my need for
distraction became pretty intense, and i was doing riskier and riskier
things.
until finally i did something incredibly stupid which left me bruised
and injured for about 3 weeks (and that was WITH using my safe word
AND having it respected)...and there was more stupidness involved, but
i think you get the idea.
so i deactivated my profiles on the sites i was trolling for trouble,
and the sex addicts anonymous group i've been going to told me i can
count my clean time from that day. i'm counting (1.) time since i
last screwed around, (2.) clean time since deactivating my profiles,
and (3.) actual clean time from all unhealthy sexual behaviors.
so my numbers are currently: 30/26/2. and those 2 days are hard
fought. said a very difficult goodbye to a "friend" in italy today.
he was upset. i was crying. i couldn't explain it to him. and i
finally just said 'i don't intend to communicate with you again' and
blocked him.
ow ow ow ow ow.....
did a stint at playing freecell online, and got up to 54th in the
world before i lost. *pout* but now i'm bored with freecell again
(it happens). and the other group i've been posting on has been very
slow. and i'm BOOOOOORRRRRRRREEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD!!!!!
and yes, i took my adhd meds today. ;)
well, that's it for me, i guess.
i'll try to be around a bit more.
jt (used to be dyenths)
astri
> really bored.
> bored bored bored.
>
> really, ridiculously bored.
hi
> i've been, um, getting up to no good in the last few months, and none
> of it was worth talking about here.
>
> but i've been getting myself out of it. problem is, now i'm bored.
>
> ok, i'll talk. sheesh, jill... ;)
not that you usually need much encouragement ;)
:(
> so i deactivated my profiles on the sites i was trolling for trouble,
> and the sex addicts anonymous group i've been going to told me i can
> count my clean time from that day. i'm counting (1.) time since i
> last screwed around, (2.) clean time since deactivating my profiles,
> and (3.) actual clean time from all unhealthy sexual behaviors.
>
> so my numbers are currently: 30/26/2. and those 2 days are hard
> fought. said a very difficult goodbye to a "friend" in italy today.
> he was upset. i was crying. i couldn't explain it to him. and i
> finally just said 'i don't intend to communicate with you again' and
> blocked him.
>
> ow ow ow ow ow.....
gotta make choices
hard choices
> did a stint at playing freecell online, and got up to 54th in the
> world before i lost. *pout* but now i'm bored with freecell again
> (it happens). and the other group i've been posting on has been very
> slow. and i'm BOOOOOORRRRRRRREEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD!!!!!
got any other interests?
> and yes, i took my adhd meds today. ;)
>
> well, that's it for me, i guess.
> i'll try to be around a bit more.
k
> jt (used to be dyenths)
hi
-- astri
======================
to email send to astri
======================
at volcano dot org
======================
jill
Jennifer Thomas <jtdg...@gmail.com> wrote:
>really bored.
>bored bored bored.
>
>really, ridiculously bored.
Hmm, ok, so here is what I tell my kids when they say they are bored:
read a book, pick your nose, wash your hair, eat a hat, clean your
room, dance a jig, lick a cat, do a chore, take a nap... I just keep
going until they roll their eyes at the absolute absurdity of it all
and wander away *wicked grin*
>i've been, um, getting up to no good in the last few months, and none
>of it was worth talking about here.
>
>but i've been getting myself out of it. problem is, now i'm bored.
Oops. Getting out of no good is, um, good *grin* but being bored while
being up to good is not. If that means you are bored I figure you are
likely to fall back into no good.
>ok, i'll talk. sheesh, jill... ;)
HA! Gotcha
Yep. Sounds stupid. *sigh*
>so i deactivated my profiles on the sites i was trolling for trouble,
>and the sex addicts anonymous group i've been going to told me i can
>count my clean time from that day. i'm counting (1.) time since i
>last screwed around, (2.) clean time since deactivating my profiles,
>and (3.) actual clean time from all unhealthy sexual behaviors.
>
>so my numbers are currently: 30/26/2. and those 2 days are hard
>fought. said a very difficult goodbye to a "friend" in italy today.
>he was upset. i was crying. i couldn't explain it to him. and i
>finally just said 'i don't intend to communicate with you again' and
>blocked him.
>
>ow ow ow ow ow.....
:(
>did a stint at playing freecell online, and got up to 54th in the
>world before i lost. *pout* but now i'm bored with freecell again
>(it happens). and the other group i've been posting on has been very
>slow. and i'm BOOOOOORRRRRRRREEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD!!!!!
>
>and yes, i took my adhd meds today. ;)
You do not sound adhd to me at the moment. I remember _well_ what
that 'sounds' like with you *grin*
>well, that's it for me, i guess.
>i'll try to be around a bit more.
>
>jt (used to be dyenths)
Good, be around more. We can have a jello fight or talk about stuff
or babble aimlessly or whatever.
I am keeping just busy enough with my new business that I feel I am
doing something but it's not getting in the way of my kids. This
is good, for now. I assume I will want to be more busy over time and
will add clients as need be. Today, for example, I had three sessions
one after another and then I was with the kids the rest of the day
(winter break from school). Wed. I will do this again. The SO just
goes into work late on those days and I shift sessions to be earlier
in the day than normal. Some of my clients are taking the break off
anyway so it makes it easier on me as well.
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
--
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The colors blend, the edges soften. Swirling and mixing
we are becoming white light.
ji...@tuells.org
confuzzled
> really bored.
> bored bored bored.
>
> really, ridiculously bored.
>
> i've been, um, getting up to no good in the last few months, and none
> of it was worth talking about here.
>
> but i've been getting myself out of it. problem is, now i'm bored.
>
> ok, i'll talk. sheesh, jill... ;)
>
> spoilered for talk of s*x and non-vanilla stuff
hi
not sure we really know you? maybe we forgot. we have enough trouble
keeping track of selves, sometimes lose track of ohters.
we not going below spoilers but thought we'd say hi. that way you have
something to distract you from boredom for a bit and jill has another
post to read
Jennifer Thomas
wrote:
sounds good. :) i remember seeing your name before. i used to post
here maybe 4 years ago to 9 years ago n stopped because my husband
"strongly disapproved" and made life unbearable for me until i quit
posting here. but that's another story.
thanks for distracting me from boredom. :) it's not quite as bad
today as it was yesterday. i went out and socialized appropriately
and ate salad with chicken n it was good for me.
i should top it off by going to sleep early. and drinknig a big glass
of water, too, come to think of it.
jt
confuzzled
> In article <1d5eeb66-90c5-45f0...@s19g2000vbm.googlegroups.com>,
> Jennifer Thomas <jtdg...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> really bored.
>> bored bored bored.
>>
>> really, ridiculously bored.
>
> Hmm, ok, so here is what I tell my kids when they say they are bored:
> read a book, pick your nose, wash your hair, eat a hat, clean your
> room, dance a jig, lick a cat, do a chore, take a nap... I just keep
> going until they roll their eyes at the absolute absurdity of it all
> and wander away *wicked grin*
>
think when we were way young and said we were bored the m*m would say
"go weed".
we don't get bored. guess maybe we did then? dunno. hard for us to
understand boredom
fuzzy
> On Dec 29, 9:42 pm, confuzzled <nospamsometimesknownas...@gmail.com>
> wrote:
>> Jennifer Thomas wrote:
>>> really bored.
>>> bored bored bored.
>>> really, ridiculously bored.
>>> i've been, um, getting up to no good in the last few months, and none
>>> of it was worth talking about here.
>>> but i've been getting myself out of it. problem is, now i'm bored.
>>> ok, i'll talk. sheesh, jill... ;)
>>> spoilered for talk of s*x and non-vanilla stuff
>> hi
>>
>> not sure we really know you? maybe we forgot. we have enough trouble
>> keeping track of selves, sometimes lose track of ohters.
>>
>> we not going below spoilers but thought we'd say hi. that way you have
>> something to distract you from boredom for a bit and jill has another
>> post to read
>
> sounds good. :) i remember seeing your name before. i used to post
> here maybe 4 years ago to 9 years ago n stopped because my husband
> "strongly disapproved" and made life unbearable for me until i quit
> posting here. but that's another story.
>
now we confused again. heh. because we read a post from you and we
thought "oh, I remember this", but we weren't here 4 years ago. maybe
you posted some other time this year. but we remember you talking about
the aspie guy
> thanks for distracting me from boredom. :) it's not quite as bad
> today as it was yesterday. i went out and socialized appropriately
> and ate salad with chicken n it was good for me.
>
sounds like you doing good stuff
we posting lots today. guess we gonna sit around and be on the computer
today so that will give you more distraction
> i should top it off by going to sleep early. and drinknig a big glass
> of water, too, come to think of it.
>
> jt
you just reminded us to drink the water that's right beside us.
and we should eat lunch <sigh>
and maybe we are going to nap. I guess we been sick
fuzzy
>> How are the counts now?
>>
>
> 35/31/2
>
> i'll get there. thanks for asking.
>
> jt
>
k. is maybe none of our business. you can tell us that. and is maybe
something we should understand and we being dumb but we don't understand
what the numbers mean.
sorry if we intruding
astri
> Jennifer Thomas wrote:
>>
>> sounds good. :) i remember seeing your name before. i used to
>> post here maybe 4 years ago to 9 years ago n stopped because my
>> husband "strongly disapproved" and made life unbearable for me until
>> i quit posting here. but that's another story.
>>
> glad you back.
>
> now we confused again. heh. because we read a post from you and we
> thought "oh, I remember this", but we weren't here 4 years ago. maybe
> you posted some other time this year. but we remember you talking
> about the aspie guy
she was a regular until about 4 years ago
then dropped in every now and then but not to stay
that's prolly when you saw her post
Jennifer Thomas
yes.
i know i posted to say that dave left, and maybe i posted something
saying that my ncl d*ed, too. n that was a couple months ago.
sorry for being confusing.
jt
Jennifer Thomas
it's ok, they're confusing and don't mean anything except to me.
the first number is the number of days since i was actively unsafe and
acted out and got h*rt.
the 2nd number is the number of days since i stopped seeking out ways
to be actively unsafe. (deactivated my profile on a site for people
who act out that way)
the 3rd number is the number of days since i did anything that's not
good for me on the computer. and that number was higher a few days
ago, then got reset to zero cuz i did something on the computer that
maybe wasn't so good for me. and then it's been 2 days since i did
that, so i'm up to 2 again.
and tomorrow the numbers should be 36/32/3.
does that make more sense?
you're not intruding at all. :) i'm glad you're asking questions
when you don't understand something. :)
oh, and i can't read a lot of posts cuz i get overwhelmed too easily.
but thank you for posting a bunch for the people who do read all the
posts. :)
jt
fuzzy
it's easy with us. we are confuzzled :P
in fact we used to be confused but that was too confusing
:)
fuzzy
> On Jan 2, 3:01 pm, fuzzy <nospamsometimesknownas...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> Jennifer Thomas wrote:
>>>> How are the counts now?
>>> 35/31/2
>>> i'll get there. thanks for asking.
>>> jt
>> k. is maybe none of our business. you can tell us that. and is maybe
>> something we should understand and we being dumb but we don't understand
>> what the numbers mean.
>>
>> sorry if we intruding
>
> it's ok, they're confusing and don't mean anything except to me.
>
> the first number is the number of days since i was actively unsafe and
> acted out and got h*rt.
glad that number is getting bigger then
>
> the 2nd number is the number of days since i stopped seeking out ways
> to be actively unsafe. (deactivated my profile on a site for people
> who act out that way)
>
aha
> the 3rd number is the number of days since i did anything that's not
> good for me on the computer. and that number was higher a few days
> ago, then got reset to zero cuz i did something on the computer that
> maybe wasn't so good for me. and then it's been 2 days since i did
> that, so i'm up to 2 again.
>
which is good. the number is getting bigger again
guess we sort of got way out control for a time with self-h*rm stuff.
was sort of an addiction for us. we used to keep track of that. now we
don't how long it's been since we did the stuff that leaves sc*rs. some
people say counting doesn't help but there was a time it did help us
> and tomorrow the numbers should be 36/32/3.
>
:)
> does that make more sense?
>
yes. thank you for answering
> you're not intruding at all. :) i'm glad you're asking questions
> when you don't understand something. :)
>
> oh, and i can't read a lot of posts cuz i get overwhelmed too easily.
> but thank you for posting a bunch for the people who do read all the
> posts. :)
>
well, now we all worried we posting too much. we do that :P
lots of times we get overwhelmed and can't read posts
and we never have much to say about relationship posts
and posts about... well... we tried to type and couldn't which is really
dumb but a lot of the posts you making we can't much read or reply to.
sorry.
Jennifer Thomas
good.
:)
> > you're not intruding at all. :) i'm glad you're asking questions
> > when you don't understand something. :)
>
> > oh, and i can't read a lot of posts cuz i get overwhelmed too easily.
> > but thank you for posting a bunch for the people who do read all the
> > posts. :)
>
> well, now we all worried we posting too much. we do that :P
heh - no, no!! jill *always* needs more posts to read! i don't think
you *can* post too much! :)
we usta be scard we post too much, too. n jill said. *nods* post
lots. :)
> lots of times we get overwhelmed and can't read posts
> and we never have much to say about relationship posts
> and posts about... well... we tried to type and couldn't which is really
> dumb but a lot of the posts you making we can't much read or reply to.
> sorry.
's ok.
i try to be careful postin bout my problems here cuz it easily gets
into triggery territory for folk, so i totally get it that you're
keeping yous safe, and i'm glad. :)
jt
jill
Jennifer Thomas <jtdg...@gmail.com> wrote:
>On Jan 2, 10:38=A0pm, fuzzy <nospamsometimesknownas...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> Jennifer Thomas wrote:
>> > On Jan 2, 3:01 pm, fuzzy <nospamsometimesknownas...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> >> Jennifer Thomas wrote:
>> >>>> How are the counts now?
>> >>> 35/31/2
>> >>> jt
>> >> k. is maybe none of our business. you can tell us that. and is maybe
>nd
>> >> what the numbers mean.
>>
>> >> sorry if we intruding
>>
>> > it's ok, they're confusing and don't mean anything except to me.
>>
>> > the first number is the number of days since i was actively unsafe and
>> > acted out and got h*rt.
>>
>> glad that number is getting bigger then
>>
>> > the 2nd number is the number of days since i stopped seeking out ways
>> > who act out that way)
>>
>> aha
>>
>> > the 3rd number is the number of days since i did anything that's not
>> > ago, then got reset to zero cuz i did something on the computer that
>> > that, so i'm up to 2 again.
>>
>> which is good. the number is getting bigger again
>>
>> guess we sort of got way out control for a time with self-h*rm stuff.
>> was sort of an addiction for us. we used to keep track of that. now we
>> don't how long it's been since we did the stuff that leaves sc*rs. some
>> people say counting doesn't help but there was a time it did help us
>>
>> > and tomorrow the numbers should be 36/32/3.
>>
>> :)
>>
>> > does that make more sense?
>>
>> yes. thank you for answering
>>
>
>good.
>:)
>
>> > when you don't understand something. =A0:)
>>
>> > oh, and i can't read a lot of posts cuz i get overwhelmed too easily.
>> > but thank you for posting a bunch for the people who do read all the
>> > posts. :)
>>
>> well, now we all worried we posting too much. we do that :P
>
>heh - no, no!! jill *always* needs more posts to read! i don't think
>you *can* post too much! :)
>
>we usta be scard we post too much, too. n jill said. *nods* post
>lots. :)
You weren't here when someone asked for a more definitive answer than
'post lots' so I randomly picked '1,000 posts per day per insider'
as a limit. No one has even come _close_ to this *small pout*.
Now that I have a new fancy shmancy laptop battery I could take it
with me all over and read and read and read *sigh* that would be
wonderful!
>> lots of times we get overwhelmed and can't read posts
>> and we never have much to say about relationship posts
>> and posts about... well... we tried to type and couldn't which is really
>> dumb but a lot of the posts you making we can't much read or reply to.
>> sorry.
>
>'s ok.
>
>i try to be careful postin bout my problems here cuz it easily gets
>into triggery territory for folk, so i totally get it that you're
>keeping yous safe, and i'm glad. :)
>
>jt
Yep, and there are always spoilers and splats to keep you safe and/or
others in asd safe.
fuzzy
that's cuz it's not a real number!! you made it up because it's
impossible. you wouldn't really want 1,000 posts
> Now that I have a new fancy shmancy laptop battery I could take it
> with me all over and read and read and read *sigh* that would be
> wonderful!
>
:P
>>> lots of times we get overwhelmed and can't read posts
>>> and we never have much to say about relationship posts
>>> and posts about... well... we tried to type and couldn't which is really
>>> dumb but a lot of the posts you making we can't much read or reply to.
>>> sorry.
>> 's ok.
>>
>> i try to be careful postin bout my problems here cuz it easily gets
>> into triggery territory for folk, so i totally get it that you're
>> keeping yous safe, and i'm glad. :)
we missed this maybe. we think you are reall careful and we appreciate it
Shiyiya
you'd have to make one post every 1.44 minutes and not sleep! or if you
slept 12 hours you'd have to make a post every .72 minutes!
fuzzy
are you encouraging her!?!?!?!
Shiyiya
I dunno, am I?
jill
Per insider! That's important. A simple 1,000 posts I have had before
and can handle nicely. But 1,000 times however many real members we
have would be a HUGE number.
I just wanted people to stop worrying about being too much. I had
5,000 posts to read once and I handled it in a day (of course there
were lots of 'me too' replies so that made it easier). My point is
that if you post you can assume that at least one person in the group
is going to read it AND appreciate it :)
Rainbow Colors (Jill)
>> Now that I have a new fancy shmancy laptop battery I could take it
>> with me all over and read and read and read *sigh* that would be
>> wonderful!
>>
>:P
>
>>>> lots of times we get overwhelmed and can't read posts
>>>> and we never have much to say about relationship posts
>>>> and posts about... well... we tried to type and couldn't which is really
>>>> dumb but a lot of the posts you making we can't much read or reply to.
>>>> sorry.
>>> 's ok.
>>>
>>> i try to be careful postin bout my problems here cuz it easily gets
>>> into triggery territory for folk, so i totally get it that you're
>>> keeping yous safe, and i'm glad. :)
>
>we missed this maybe. we think you are reall careful and we appreciate it