ASC Awards Dinner 3/5
Stephen Ratliff
Awards Dinner part 3
Deep Space Nine
Stephen is still in the Next Generation Era Deep Space Nine uniform when
we return from break. The guests are finishing up their soup.
Stephen walks over center stage and begins addressing the crowd. "It's
now time for the Deep Space Nine section of our awards. But before we
get to that, I'd like to explain this year's awards scale. This year if
you commented 1-2 lines, it was worth 1 point, 3-5 was worth 2; 6-10, 5;
11-25, 7. If you commented more than 25 lines it was worth 10 points.
The highest total points won. If there was a tie for first place, a tie
breaker was done by the total lines commented. No tie breakers were
used for second and third place. At least 3 stories had to be commented
on for second and third to be awarded."
"Now presenting our first DS9 award, he runs his own bar and is a
community leader, she's a noted practical joker on her eighth life,
Presenting the award for Best DS9 parody, Quark and Lieutenant Commander
Jadxia Dax."
Quark enters from the right wearing one of his more dressy outfits, and
Dax comes from the left in her wedding attire.
"Apparently, Stephen considers us Deep Space Nine's comic relief," Quark
stated once they reached the podium.
"Aren't all Ferengi," Dax asked.
"I take that as an insult to my race," Quark replied.
"Quark, I don't think you can do anything to me," Dax replied.
"I'll have you know I swing a mean bat'leth," Quark responded.
"Don't you mean throw down," Dax replied.
"I've improved," Quark replied. "In any case, the award for best Deep
Space Nine Parody was a tie."
"The winners were..." Dax announced.
Let's Get Ready to Rumble by JV
and
ST:TDG "In the Maquis"
As the two winners come up to the stage, some background music from
Quark's plays
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After the winner's exit the stage, Stephen stands to announce the next
award presenters. "He's Star Trek's everyman handyman, and his partner
in crime is a genetically enhanced doctor. Presenting the award for
best Deep Space Nine Poem are Chief Miles Edward O'Brien and Doctor
Julian Bashir."
The two enter in full dress uniform from the door in the center of the
backdrop.
O'Brien began, "Cannon to the right of them."
Bashir responded, "Cannon to the left of them."
"Volleyed and thundered," they chorused.
"In to the ranks of death ..." O'Brien said.
"... rode the six hundred," Bashir concluded.
"Poets on ASC are rare," O'Brien said. "Their works are almost drown
out by all the stories."
"So it is with pride that we note that all the series had a best poem
award this year for the first time," Bashir said.
"So without further delay, the best Deep Space Nine Poem was," O'Brien
said.
Nothing or Odoital
the winner walks to the stage, the Deep Space Nine melody is played by a
lone oboe.
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
Stephen announces, "He claims he's a play and simple tailor. His
luncheon companion was second in his class at Star Fleet Medical.
Presenting the Award for Best Garek Bashir Story, Garek and Bashir."
"Will you ever tell me the end of that poem?" Garek asked.
"Boldly they rode out of the valley of Death,
but not the six hundred...
Cannon to the right of them,
Cannon to the left of them,
volley and thundered.
Remember the change they made,
Remember the light brigade,
noble six hundred," Bashir recited.
"Tragic," Garek commented.
"True but the winners fro the Best Garek Bashir Story are hardly
tragic," Bashir commented. "Third Place was ...
Nom de Plume by Arcadia
"Second place was..." Garek announced.
Snake charmer by Arcadia
"And the Best Garek Bashir Story for 1997 was ..." Bashir announced.
Converse Symmetry by Terri Drummonds
As Terri walks up to receive her award, Beautiful Dreamer once again
echoes across the room.
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After Terri returns to her seat, Stephen said, "He was prefect of Bajor
and ruled Cardassia, she was a Bajoran Freedom fighter and now is Deep
Space Nine's First Officer. Presenting the Award for Best Kira Dukat is
Gul Dukat and Major Kira Nerys.
Dukat enters wearing his usual uniform. Kira, however is dressed in a
stunning pale blue dress.
"Major, you look absolutely lovely in that dress," Dukat commented.
"Can it," Kira replied. "I'm only wearing it because Dax insisted."
"It reminds me of your mother," Dukat commented.
"I am nothing like my mother," Kira replied hostilely.
"No, you're not," Dukat responded. "Kira Dukat Romances have really
only been around since last spring."
"It has become an interesting field," Kira said. "Perhaps this is due
to the contrasts between the two characters."
"That being said, the third place story was ..." Dukat announced.
Wow by Ariana
"Second Place was ..." Kira announced.
The Serpent an the Hawk by Laura Taylor
"And the Best Kira Dukat Romance for 1997 is ..." Dukat said.
Skin deep by Melissa
As Melissa walks up to the stage, Moon River plays.
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After Melissa sits down, Stephen stands up, muttering, "I really should
have hired an orchestra with a longer list of songs." Then he said,
"Now to announce our next award, he's a shape shifting security
chief, she's a Bajoran Freedom fighter, presenting the award for best
Kira Odo Romance is Constable Odo and Major Kira Nyres."
Major Kira enters from the wings in a conservative green dress. Odo is
at her side in a white tux.
"Odo and I have been considered an item on Deep Space Nine for quite
some time," Kira began
"Long before the show thought we were," Odo commented.
"True, but one thing about having a shape shifting lover," Kira began.
"No one notices him entering or exiting."
"I paticularily like the phaser disguise."
"I prefer the combadge disguise... we don't get interrupted that way,"
Kira said.
"There is that," Odo commented.
"In any case the winners for Best Kira Odo Romance are ...
Odo said, "Third Place was ...
Liquid Assets. Written by Carolyn R. Fulton
Kira announced "Second Place was a big tie...
Glimmer. Posted by kyr...@aol.com (Kyroka)
Into You. Written by Tracy Hemenover
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. Posted by grnw...@aol.com
and
"Stage Directions". Written by by schlock
Odo and Kira said, "And the Best Kira Odo Romance for 1997 was ...
Everyday. Written by Elisabeth "Zee" Pinto
While Elizabeth strolls up to the stage, the orchestra plays "A Little
Date" from Ranma 1/2
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After Elizabeth sits down, Stephen introduces, "He's the genetically
enhanced Doctor age 30, she's a trill, age 331. Presenting the award
for Best Dax Bashir (JJ) are Doctor Julian Bashir and Lieutenant
Commander Jadxia Dax."
Dax has changed to a more traditional green satin gown since last we
saw her. Bashir is in dress uniform.
"I see you changed," Bashir commented.
"It wasn't appropriate for this award," Dax responded.
"True," Bashir remarked. "Perhaps we should present the award?"
"That is what we are here for," Dax responded. "The Best Dax Bashir
Romance for 1997 was ..."
Jouer Les Amoureux. Written by Red Skye
As Red walks up to the stage, the orchestra plays, "Moonlight Legend"
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After Red sits down, Stephen announces, "He's the only man who keeps the
station together, she's a botanist and mother of two. Presenting the
Award for Best DS9 General Romance, Miles and Kieko O'Brien."
The O'Briens come on stage, Molly and Kiroshi in tow. They drop them
off with Stephen before going to the podium.
"Stephen asked us to give this award with the hopes of sparking
additional stories about us," Kieko began.
"We are not against it," Miles continued. "This year's General Romance
Category consists of over 27 different pairings. The most of any General
Romance Category."
"We got none together," Kieko said. "Is romance between a married
couple taboo on this newsgroup."
"We got one in '96," Miles said, "But nothing since then."
"In any case third place was a tie..." Kieko announced.
Just for Tonight by Ariana
and
In Captivity by Mark Knasinski
"Second place was..." Miles announced
Voices of the Prophets by Ariana
"And the Best Deep Space Nine General Romance for 1997 was ..." Kieko
announced.
Cardassian Hostage by Mary Knasinski
As Mary comes up to the stage, a selection of the Marriage of Figaro
plays.
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After Mary sits down, Stephen tries to stand up, but Kiroshi and Molly
won't let him. "Chief O'Brien, come get your children," Stephen said
politely. "I've got an awards show to run, or I would be happy to watch
them." Miles and Kieko come back out, with a sheepish smile on their
faces. After they take their children backstage, he continues, "He's
the Emissary of the Prophets, commands Deep Space Nine, and is its best
cook. Presenting the Award for Best Deep Space Nine Story is Captain
Benjiman Layfette Sisko."
Sisko beams in in his dress uniform.
"Deep Space Nine is different from other Treks," Sisko began. "Some
have called it Star Sit. It is not. All the Treks in Star Trek are not
physical, and you don't have to be on a roving starship to tell a good
story. The authors of this year's Best Deep Space Nine Story have shown
that."
"So, the third place Deep Space Nine story is ...
Bittersweet Revenge by Laura Taylor
"Second Place is ...
Babylon by Ariana
"And the Best Deep Space Nine Story for 1997 was ...
Kalevian Montar by Marlissa
As Marlissa comes up to the stage, a full orchestra version of the Deep
Space Nine Theme plays.
[The winners speeches will be included on the web version]
After Marlissa finishes her speech, Stephen announces, "That concludes
our Deep Space Nine portion. While the main course is served, we'll go
to break
Main Course:
Butter Glazed Grilled Chicken Breast or
Tufo
Baked Potatoes with your choice of toppings
Green Peas
[Commercials]
{#5}
[A Klingon on in Quark's bends down to pull his knife out of his
opponent. A rip is heard]
Did you just tear your pants?
[Klingon nods]
Then you'll need Garek's Express Taylor Service. No need to go any
where, just simply dial 1-888-SOWN U UP on your communicator and Garek
will be right their.
{#6}
[Tom Servo from MST3k appears]
TOM: Has your robot gone the way of the dodo?
Do you need your room cleaned?
Then come on down to Tom Servo's Used Robots
[Moves down a line of robots]
We've got protocol droids,
R2 units
even Soong type androids
All under 400 bars of latuim. or
try our 36 month payment plan, just 50 down, 15 bars a month.
[Blue Screen with writing]
Tom Servo's Used Robots
3000 Promenade,
Deep Space Nine, Bajor
--
Stephen Ratliff CS Major, Radford University.
srat...@runet.edu Radford, Virginia 24142-7496
rec.arts.tv.mst3k.misc's polite target. Marrissa Stories Author
http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/
http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/FAQs/ FAQ Maintainer for ASC.
The ASC Awards winners will be announce this Friday or Saturday.
http://www.cs.runet.edu/~sratliff/awards/
- "Chief, how does that poem end?" "You don't want to know."
- Garek and O'Brien about "The Charge of the Light Brigade" in
Deep Space Nine's "Sacrifice of Angels"
Niamh Crilly
>
> "Poets on ASC are rare," O'Brien said. "Their works are almost drown
> out by all the stories."
>
> "So it is with pride that we note that all the series had a best poem
> award this year for the first time," Bashir said.
>
> "So without further delay, the best Deep Space Nine Poem was," O'Brien
> said.
>
> Nothing or Odoital
>
> the winner walks to the stage, the Deep Space Nine melody is played by a
> lone oboe.
Niamh steps up on stage and tearfully accepts the award."Okay I'll keep
this short considering I've forgotten everything I wanted to say and how
to breathe as well.Well mainly thanks to everyone who voted in the poems
section and to Odo who I unusually didn't toture too badly in this poem.
Also thanks to everyone who's commented on my poems since I've been here
without those and of course my friends I would have stopped writing only
days after I started".
Niamh
the stunned and very bad speach writer <g>.
--
A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
Paul Valery (1871-1945)
visit my poetry page at
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Forum/3156/
Henry G. Chatroop
Awards Dinner part 3
Deep Space Nine
"And the Best Garek Bashir Story for 1997 was ..." Bashir announced.
Converse Symmetry by Terri Drummonds
As Terri walks up to receive her award, Beautiful Dreamer once again echoes
across the room.
And the audience rise to their feet, unleashing a thunderous clapping and
stomping of their feet.
This was not only the best of 1997 - In my opinion it was one of the best
G/B stories ever written and a well deserved award.
<snip>
After Elizabeth sits down, Stephen introduces, "He's the genetically
enhanced Doctor age 30, she's a trill, age 331. Presenting the award for
Best Dax Bashir (JJ) are Doctor Julian Bashir and Lieutenant Commander
Jadzia Dax."
Dax has changed to a more traditional green satin gown since last we saw
her. Bashir is in dress uniform.
"I see you changed," Bashir commented.
"It wasn't appropriate for this award," Dax responded.
"True," Bashir remarked. "Perhaps we should present the award?"
"That is what we are here for," Dax responded. "The Best Dax Bashir
Romance for 1997 was ..."
Jouer Les Amoureux. Written by Red Skye
And across the furtherest reaches of cyberspace, a scruffily dressed
writer is cackling away as she types on the laptop she borrowed from the
BHM and a big booming voice bellows - R-E-D.. Big mistake since the muse
has bitten our industrious writer, stomping into the computer room, she
then proceeds to use her 3 inch razor sharp claws to rip, tear and shred
the BHM then she picks up a window's manual, tosses it and grabs the How to
Write JAVA(tm) Script in 21 days manual and pummels him with that for a
while. All the while screeching, I was just writing a love scene so hot you
need to be wearing an asbestos suit to read it and *you interrupted me*.
In between pummels he points at the computer, who's little screen is
glowing and gasps out *Look at the computer.*
She looks, and forgets about reprimanding the BHM for breaking in on her
muse, and he drops to the floor, to crawl away and lick his wounds.
"Oh me Oh mi," says Red, before dashing off to make herself presentable.
And thanks to the wonders of matter transportation devices Red walks up to
the stage, as the orchestra plays, "Moonlight Legend". Her hair cascades
down her back in a riot of curls (because there was no time to visit a
stylist) her slim body clad in a blood red skin tight sapphire beaded lycra
cat suit, a belt of red dyed pig skin is brisling with 6 inch sharp thorns
and matches the collar around her throat. He long legs clad in matching pig
skin thorn studded knee high boots, a bull whip studded with more of the
thorns in her hand.
A drooling Worf steps into sight, and she shows him just how well she can
use it, proving that even Klingon's have a pain threshold. He crawls away
to find a dark hole to curl up and die in.
"Thank-you, Thank-you, Thank-you.. This is sooo unexpected. I don't know
what to say, First, I'd like to thank my stepfather, who gave me access to
the net, my mother for bringing me into this world. The wonderful people of
ascem, for inspiring me to write this piece with their stories and
challenge, to Victoria Soo for the J&J fanfic archive, whoever voted for
me.."
The AMBER ALERT - SIGNIFYING WINNER WILL BE SHOT IF THE ACCEPTANCE SPEECH
DOESN'T END SHORTLY GOES OFF.
"And in conclusion, I'd like to borrow the immortal words of the T-800,
I'll be back. I've been learning the art of Slash writing..."
Bashir starts looking nervous. Garak grins from the wings.
"And if Sophie ever gets back to me, I'll get back to work on the G/B
story I was writing before I took my leave of this group."
Then she strolls off stage flicking her whip in search of the Paramount
executive who thought it was a ggggrrrreat idea to put Dax and Worf
together.
Marlissa Campbell
srat...@runet.edu (Stephen Ratliff) wrote:
>
>Awards Dinner part 3
>
>Deep Space Nine
>After Terri returns to her seat, Stephen said, "He was prefect of Bajor
>and ruled Cardassia, she was a Bajoran Freedom fighter and now is Deep
>Space Nine's First Officer. Presenting the Award for Best Kira Dukat is
>Gul Dukat and Major Kira Nerys.
>
>Dukat enters wearing his usual uniform. Kira, however is dressed in a
>stunning pale blue dress.
>
>"Major, you look absolutely lovely in that dress," Dukat commented.
>
>"Can it," Kira replied. "I'm only wearing it because Dax insisted."
>
>"It reminds me of your mother," Dukat commented.
>
>"I am nothing like my mother," Kira replied hostilely.
>
>"No, you're not," Dukat responded. "Kira Dukat Romances have really
>only been around since last spring."
>
>"It has become an interesting field," Kira said. "Perhaps this is due
>to the contrasts between the two characters."
>
>"That being said, the third place story was ..." Dukat announced.
>
>Wow by Ariana
>
>"Second Place was ..." Kira announced.
>
>The Serpent an the Hawk by Laura Taylor
>
>"And the Best Kira Dukat Romance for 1997 is ..." Dukat said.
>
>Skin deep by Melissa
>
>As Melissa walks up to the stage, Moon River plays.
All eyes are riveted to Marlissa's form as she steps up onto the
platform. Her pale green Versace gown clings to every alluring curve,
and is cut to reveal her enviable cleavage and shapely legs. Gul
Dukat is clearly impressed by this talented writer. She shakes her
head and tosses back her long red hair, leaving a single lock hanging
flirtatiously over one eye.
In one fluid motion, Marlissa takes her award and elbows Kira away
from Dukat. So petite she has to stretch up on tiptoe to do so,
Marlissa lays a serious liplock on the deposed interstellar despot and
former Cardassian Prefect of Bajor.
The audience looks on in stunned silence as the presenter and the
award winner share a passionate embrace. Major Kira clears her throat
with an audible, "Ahem."
After a long moment, Dukat breaks the spell, and gently admonishes
Marlissa, "You really should just accept the award -- then we can
leave."
Her eyes still glued to the gul, Marlissa waves the hand holding her
award in the general direction of the crowd, and says, "Yeah.
Thanks." Softly, but just loudly enough to be picked up by the
microphone, she adds -- to him alone, "Can we go now?"
Kira snorts as Marlissa and Gul Dukat leave the podium hand in hand.
"Of all the...," the jealous Major hisses at their departing backs.
"Don't be so greedy," Marlissa retorts over her creamy shoulder, "You
never appreciated him anyway -- and besides, you still have Odo."
[snipped]
>
>After Mary sits down, Stephen tries to stand up, but Kiroshi and Molly
>won't let him. "Chief O'Brien, come get your children," Stephen said
>politely. "I've got an awards show to run, or I would be happy to watch
>them." Miles and Kieko come back out, with a sheepish smile on their
>faces. After they take their children backstage, he continues, "He's
>the Emissary of the Prophets, commands Deep Space Nine, and is its best
>cook. Presenting the Award for Best Deep Space Nine Story is Captain
>Benjiman Layfette Sisko."
>
>Sisko beams in in his dress uniform.
>
>"Deep Space Nine is different from other Treks," Sisko began. "Some
>have called it Star Sit. It is not. All the Treks in Star Trek are not
>physical, and you don't have to be on a roving starship to tell a good
>story. The authors of this year's Best Deep Space Nine Story have shown
>that."
>
>"So, the third place Deep Space Nine story is ...
>
>Bittersweet Revenge by Laura Taylor
>
>"Second Place is ...
>
>Babylon by Ariana
>
>"And the Best Deep Space Nine Story for 1997 was ...
>
>Kalevian Montar by Marlissa
>
>As Marlissa comes up to the stage, a full orchestra version of the Deep
>Space Nine Theme plays.
Out of the corner of her eye, as she accepts the award from a smiling
Captain Sisko, Marlissa spies a number of her so-called friends
taking advantage of her brief absence to converge on her date, Gul
Dukat -- *her* Gul Dukat. "Shameless gul-grabbing hussies," she
mutters under her breath.
"Something wrong?" Captain Sisko asks solicitously.
"No, of course not," Marlissa hastily covers her distraction. "Let's
just get this over with, okay? It's getting late and everybody wants
to get on to the other awards."
The poor award-winner is clearly upset. Helplessly trapped, as she
is, on the podium, she's unable to miss the sight of Laura Taylor
peeling grapes and feeding them, one by one, to Gul Dukat. Worse yet,
Mary Knasinski has climbed right into his lap! At least Ariana is
showing some modicum of decency, and is simply trying to engage the
Cardassian in an animated conversation.
"Uh," Marlissa starts with hesitation, tears welling up in her
beautiful blue eyes, "I just want to thank the organizers of the
contest -- I'm truly grateful for all your hard work, and -- of course
-- a million, zillion thank yous to everyone who supported my story
for this award. It is indeed a great honor to stand here tonight."
She chokes a bit, clears her throat, and manages to get out one last,
almost whispered, "Thank you."
Captain Sisko smiles broadly and opens his arms to give her a
congratulatory hug, but Marlissa has eyes only for Gul Dukat and the
mass of femininity surrounding him. 'Uh, thanks," she says, almost
rudely, "but I have to leave now," as she dodges the Captain's
embrace and nearly runs back to her table.
Laura Taylor
Marlissa Campbell wrote:
> All eyes are riveted to Marlissa's form as she steps up onto the
> platform. Her pale green Versace gown clings to every alluring curve,
> and is cut to reveal her enviable cleavage and shapely legs. Gul
> Dukat is clearly impressed by this talented writer. She shakes her
> head and tosses back her long red hair, leaving a single lock hanging
> flirtatiously over one eye.
>
> In one fluid motion, Marlissa takes her award and elbows Kira away
> from Dukat. So petite she has to stretch up on tiptoe to do so,
> Marlissa lays a serious liplock on the deposed interstellar despot and
> former Cardassian Prefect of Bajor.
>
> The audience looks on in stunned silence
With the notable exception of a group of 8 attractive and talented
women of varying ages and nationalities seated in the same row
Marlissa came from, who jump up and shout with a joyous cheer, "It's
about time!"
as the presenter and the
> award winner share a passionate embrace. Major Kira clears her throat
> with an audible, "Ahem."
<snip>
> Out of the corner of her eye, as she accepts the award from a smiling
> Captain Sisko, Marlissa spies a number of her so-called friends
> taking advantage of her brief absence to converge on her date, Gul
> Dukat -- *her* Gul Dukat. "Shameless gul-grabbing hussies," she
> mutters under her breath.
>
> "Something wrong?" Captain Sisko asks solicitously.
>
> "No, of course not," Marlissa hastily covers her distraction. "Let's
> just get this over with, okay? It's getting late and everybody wants
> to get on to the other awards."
>
> The poor award-winner is clearly upset. Helplessly trapped, as she
> is, on the podium, she's unable to miss the sight of Laura Taylor
> peeling grapes and feeding them, one by one, to Gul Dukat.
As Marlissa attempts to give her friend and biggest fan 'the look',
Laura looks up and bats sinfully long lashes over green eyes that
would make any Mary Sue-wanna-be envious and says, "But, Marlissa,
you're a happily married woman. We're not. Shouldn't you be setting a
proper example for those darling children of yours and *sharing*?"
Worse yet,
> Mary Knasinski has climbed right into his lap! At least Ariana is
> showing some modicum of decency, and is simply trying to engage the
> Cardassian in an animated conversation.
Congratulations to Marlissa, Ariana, Terrie, Mary, Arcady, and
everybody esle who outdid themselves in the DS9 category this year!
Laura, wondering where Marlissa hid Dukat after she rescued him from
the torture chamber AKA "Wrongs Darker than Death or Night".
"Marlissa!" she calls with some urgency. "What did you *do* with him?
I need to borrow him for a story! *Please*?"
--
~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed together. The chicken, smoking
a cigarette, looks very self-satisfied, but the egg does not look at
all happy. "Well," the egg mutters, "I guess we answered *that*
question."
from "A Prairie Home Companion"
Mary Kay Knasinski
Laura Taylor <dre...@roanoke.infi.net> wrote:
: Marlissa Campbell wrote:
:> The poor award-winner is clearly upset. Helplessly trapped, as she
:> is, on the podium, she's unable to miss the sight of Laura Taylor
:> peeling grapes and feeding them, one by one, to Gul Dukat.
: Worse yet,
:> Mary Knasinski has climbed right into his lap! At least Ariana is
:> showing some modicum of decency, and is simply trying to engage the
:> Cardassian in an animated conversation.
Mary Knasinski, her arms wrapped tightly around the Gul's neck, tries to
explain to him, between grape-tasting kisses, that her story with
Christine Collins, "Cardassian Hostage," was only meant in FUN! She is
well aware that the Gul's sense of humor vanishes where his manhood and
dignity are concerned. Mary breathlessly mumbles her thanks to all those
kind souls who voted for the story, as Dukat climbs to his feet and
prepares to carry Mary out of the room.
But wait! A breathless Weyoun rushes in, brandishing a copy of "In
Captivity" with an evil gleam in his blue eyes. Mary sighs loudly as a
distracted Gul Dukat lowers her to the floor.
*****
Thank you again, and congratulatiions to ALL the winners!
Mary
Douglas A. McLeod
Stephen Ratliff (srat...@runet.edu) writes:
>
> "I've improved," Quark replied. "In any case, the award for best Deep
> Space Nine Parody was a tie."
>
> "The winners were..." Dax announced.
>
> Let's Get Ready to Rumble by JV
> and
> ST:TDG "In the Maquis"
>
> As the two winners come up to the stage, some background music from
> Quark's plays.
Douglas, author of the Door Repair Guy series, who has seen two chances
at the podium slip by tonight already, knowing that this nomination is
the last opportunity to justify the expense of tuxedo and limousine (both
purchased), realizing however that this is a tie vote requiring extra
measures of magnanimity and grace, drops his shrimp fork and dashes for
the stage, reaching the microphone as the syllable 'quis' floats from Dax's
lips.
Douglas: "I would like to thank every one of you for this great honour.
As this is the parody category you may all be expecting some drole remarks,
but I would like instead to use this moment to bring to your attention the
plight of an imprisoned individual, a person undeservedly incarerated and
unjustly abandoned by his own government. He may be Maquis, yes, but is
there a one among those present today who can say unequivocally that he or
she does not hold some grudging respect for that cause? The prisoner I
speak of, as some of you have no doubt guessed, is Thomas -- "
Voice from the back: "Streaker!"
Everyone twists around to see a naked man sprint down one side of the
hall, across the front, and back up the other side, with several tuxedoed
security guards in pursuit.
Streaker: "Woo hooooooo!!!!!"
Douglas: "Door Repair Guy!"
DRG: "You tell'em, baby!!"
The guards swarm the naked streaker and hustle him out.
Douglas (doing his best David Niven): "Such a big fuss over such a little
thing. Heh heh."
The ladies don't seem to think so. Many are fanning themselves with their
menues, and staring toward the exit. The tables are alive with conversation.
Quark shrugs. Dax smiles.
Douglas returns to his seat.
--
http://www.ncf.carleton.ca:12345/freeport/sigs/futurist/star-trek/
creative/menu
Grnwoman
<"In any case the winners for Best Kira Odo Romance are ...
<Odo said, "Third Place was ...
<Liquid Assets. Written by Carolyn R. Fulton
<Kira announced "Second Place was a big tie...
<Glimmer. Posted by kyr...@aol.com (Kyroka)
Into You. Written by Tracy Hemenover
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. Posted by grnw...@aol.com
and
"Stage Directions". Written by by schlock
<Odo and Kira said, "And the Best Kira Odo Romance for 1997 was ...
<Everyday. Written by Elisabeth "Zee" Pinto
Congratulations, Zee! %-) "Everyday" is a wonderful story ... as are also
"Liquid Assets," "Glimmer," "Into You," and "Stage Directions." I am grateful
to have my story included in such distinguished company, and pleased to see the
membership of RAFL (the Rene Auberjonois Fan List) so well-represented here.
Gratefully,
GreenWoman
* * *
There is humor in everything, no matter how grim. - Warren Zevon -
If I wasn't crazy, I would go insane. - Jimmy Buffett -
Be cool, but care. - Buckaroo Banzai -
Elisabeth Pinto
<Zee almost trips over as she scrambles up the stairs to the podium. She
crushes Kira's bone in a hug and plants a very and very sloppy kiss on
Odo's mouth>
I really can't believe that so many people liked "Everyday" so much.
Thank you for making your feelings known and voting it as your favourite
O/K, when there are so many more experienced writers out there.
This is all rather humbling. I'd like to thank Judith Medina for her
support in my various crazed endeavours, and Tracy Hemenover who was so
nice on my first ever O/K story, a long time ago. :)
Thanks again!
Zee <giving Odo a wink>
TDrummonds
In article <6hat3i$q...@newslink.runet.edu>, srat...@runet.edu (Stephen
Ratliff) writes:
>"True but the winners fro the Best Garek Bashir Story are hardly
>tragic," Bashir commented. "Third Place was ...
>
>Nom de Plume by Arcadia
>
>"Second place was..." Garek announced.
>
>Snake charmer by Arcadia
>
>"And the Best Garek Bashir Story for 1997 was ..." Bashir announced.
>
>Converse Symmetry by Terri Drummonds
Garak and Bashir look around, trying to figure out just where the award winner
is sitting. They wait patiently for a few seconds and then Bashir mutters,
"Great. Another Golden Globe Awards moment. You'd think after Christine La...."
Suddenly, a squeal echoes from the back of the awards hall, followed by the
clickety-clack of high heels against the parque dance floor. A short women
dressed in a navy silk Liz Claiborne wrap dress stops just in time to not trip
up the stairs before trying to gracefully ascend the stairs.
The two award presenters simply look on for a moment before Bashir gestures to
the microphone. "Your speech," he quietly reminds her.
Ter smiles weakly, turns to the audience, and shrugs. "Capital gains rates,"
she confesses. "Rom was having problems calculating the tax on his short term
capital gains."
The audience sniggers. Ter's eyes widen. "No, *really.* That's what happened!"
The audience shakes their heads. She gives up. "There has been some fantastic
G/B this year and I've had the honor of getting to know quite a few authors
because of this story. I'd like to thank Mary for converting me to G/B, Kit for
inspiring wicked plot twists, Ariana for suffering through the numerous drafts,
Sophie for her wealth of G/B, Andrea for all the Kardasi, and Joanne and Karen
for such wonderful support. To all those who've sent messages and feedback,
THANK YOU!"
Ter turns and gives a shy smile to the boys. "You guys... you're quite an
inspiration."
"Well," Bashir sniffs, "if we're such an inspiration, why can't you see fit to
get us to...."
"Now, Julian," the Cardassian whispers and pats the doctor on the shoulder,
"all in good time."
***((()))***
**********************<<<>>>**********************
ralph buttigieg
Henry G. Chatroop wrote in message <01bd6b1c$f6728ac0$050000c0@hydra5>...
>
>
>"That is what we are here for," Dax responded. "The Best Dax Bashir
>Romance for 1997 was ..."
>
>Jouer Les Amoureux. Written by Red Skye
>
> And across the furtherest reaches of cyberspace, a scruffily dressed
>writer is cackling away as she types on the laptop she borrowed from the
>BHM and a big booming voice bellows - R-E-D.. Big mistake since the muse.
I would really like to read this story. Can someone please send me a copy or
point me to an archive.
ta
Ralph