Re: Bundchen: 'If the Pats* Lose, I'll Run Naked Through Mid-Town Manhattan'
sam
here explain why
"Brady 3 INT" <gabc1...@verizon.net> wrote in message
news:Xns9A39831...@verizon.net...
> http://www.sportsline.com/spin/story/10613134
>
> FOXBOROUGH, Mass. (Sportsman's Daily Wire Service) -- Winning isn't
> everything, particularly if losing means you get to glimpse Brazilian
> supermodel Gisele Bundchen striding naked down the Great White Way. A
> trip to the Super Bowl has suddenly presented the Patriots with an
> unexpected dilemma: a choice between a perfect record and beholding the
> perfect body, unclad and in motion.
>
> In the aftermath of their 21-12 victory over the San Diego Chargers, Tom
> Brady's celebrated girlfriend startled onlookers by promising to run
> naked down Broadway in the unlikely event the Patriots lose to the
> Arizona-bound N.Y. Giants -- unlikely until the very moment she parted
> her full lips and made the surprise announcement.
>
> "Never in a million years did I think I'd have a problem motivating a
> team heading into the Super Bowl," said Patriots coach Bill Belichick.
> "Gisele opens her big mouth and look at 'em -- half the guys are staring
> into space, the others are leering like they've just stumbled onto their
> uncle's private porn stash. And who can blame them -- that's one fine
> specimen. But this is a completely new wrinkle ... though wrinkle is
> probably the wrong word, as I've seen Gisele in a thong, and trust me,
> that butt's tighter than a fine-tuned snare drum."
>
> Most of the players interviewed refuse to let the indelible image of
> Gisele Bundchen gamboling gazelle-like though the streets -- if a
> gazelle were 5-11 with perfect breasts and generated enough heat to thaw
> 30 square miles of permafrost -- to become a distraction.
>
> "To be perfectly honest, she's been a distraction the moment we saw pics
> of her on the beach with T.B. in the offseason," said linebacker Mike
> Vrabel. "Those legs, that butt, those lips. Thankfully we've got
> football to release the sexual tension. Bringing an erection onto the
> field is never a good idea, particularly for a linebacker who relies on
> lateral pursuit to be effective."
>
> When she learned of the players' reaction to her provocative remark,
> Bundchen immediately tried walking it back.
>
> "It was a mistake and I'm sorry I said it. I don't know what I could
> have been thinking -- Midtown Manhattan is a parking lot any time of day
> or night. It'd take 30 minutes just to make it from the Theater District
> to 34th Street. And what if I ran into the Naked Cowboy and had to pose
> for pictures with every out-of-town Tom, Dick and Harry? Tack on another
> 30 minutes, easily. How 'bout I simply flashed my breasts from a
> billboard in Times Square and call it a day ... will that work?"
>
> Not for Tedy Bruschi it won't.
>
> "To me, a perfect season is winning the Superbowl AND getting to see
> Gisele naked. So no matter how you slice it, a perfect season is no
> longer possible. We win, we have to live with the thought of Gisele's
> legs wrapped around Tom's neck, rolling around on some beach somewhere.
> And if we lose, everything we've accomplished is out the window. I
> wonder if Gisele has a sister*. What's the temperature in Rio this time
> of year?"
>
> Giants coach Tom Coughlin suspects there's more to Bundchen's
> announcement than meets the eye and detects a whiff of classic Belichick
> gamesmanship.
>
> "Belichick is behind this, I can smell it. He wants us going into the
> game thinking his team is distracted and conflicted. First off, I'm not
> going to have the girlfriend of an opposing quarterback run naked on our
> home turf. Second, if Bill wants to play that game, fine. If the
> Patriots win, our offensive line will run buck naked through the streets
> of Foxborough. That's over 1,000 pounds of highly repulsive man-meat.
> Your move, Belichick."
>
> Rich Peltz, a Giants fan from Weehauken, N.J., captured the sentiment
> shared by football fans around the country who've been waiting and
> hoping for the insufferably smug Patriots to stumble.
>
> "I haven't been to a Broadway show in over 20 years. But Gisele Bundchen
> naked, with Tom Brady watching helplessly on the sidelines, now that's
> one show I'd pay Broadway prices to see."
>
> * Gisele has five sisters, one for each of the Patriots' starting
> linebacker corps, with two to divide up among the team's secondary:
> Raquel, Graziela, Gabriela, Rafaela and her fraternal twin Patrícia.
>
GraveDigger
Oh boy, more Brady family home movies...