No, I don't think it was false at all. Fields, who I happened to know
personally as a pocket billiards player, frequently had HEATED EXCHANGES
with "Mortimer" on the air. Those exchanges were hilarious and I hope you
are old enough to have listened to a few of them.
BTW, did you know that Fields taught Judy Garland to play pool at about age
16?? She developed a lifelong love of the game. The studios always had
to provide a pool table in her trailer, or wherever she stayed, on all the
movies she made.
Judy met an unfortunate end with drugs, etc.... but she was one more smart
and talented actress. I enjoyed her work immensely; but at the same time
felt sorry for her.
McDave of Maryland, "A Faire Lande of Pleasant Living"
===================================================================
W. C. Fields was a spontaneous humorist, like many from the Vaudeville
days (like Groucho) they worked often enough without a script.
So things just "popped out" in speech and often in movie
takes they just kept what he said because it was funnier than
the script. He would to keep the filming crews in stiches.
He had a running war with Mae West, who wrote many of the scripts
for the movies they both were in. They constantly tried to upstage
one another.
There are several good biographies on Fields, and I recommend
reading some of them for both a visit to the past and a laugh.
Fields did have an alcohol problem so that was not completely
a running gag. His departing comment is on his tomestone is:
""On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia."
Only a pig would try and shut down a nice conversation. Go up to 100
kids under 20 and ask them who wc is and I guar rhone tee you dude,
not 5 or 10% will have a clue. Kids today, do not know shit about
anything that happened 20 years ago.
WC had a large house and a writer came over to work with him and he
ran out of booze. He took him up into the attic which was huge and it
was full of cases of gin from end to end. There was more booze there
than in a large liquor store. The writer said, why, you could not
possibly drink all of this in your life time. Why so much.
Ah yes indeed my boy he said, that is quite true, but just in case I
get unlucky and live longer than I plan to, I don't want to be caught
short and laspse into DT's, ah yessss.......................
He had pals over on the weekends for parties at the pool where every
one got stinko drunk. It broke up when Anthony quinn brought his
little boy over and when they were all smashed the boy fell into the
pool and drowned.
Erroll Flynn threw parties just like it. Before any of the ho's could
drown, he would save them by carrying them into his bedroom to dry
them off. In like flynn. FL
One or your obsessions.
WC Fields died in 1946, which is probably before you were was born.
You could not have heard any of the exchanges on the Charlie McCarthy
show. Anybody born after WWII would not know the radio days first
hand.
So you are not qualified to be in this exchange. Too young.
His official cause of death was pneumonia but he was known for have
cirrhosis of the liver and kidney complications. No matter, he
made his mark.
But he has been often misquoted, I don't remember his saying on the
radio
when asked why he did not drink water
"Fish f*ck in it."
I can't imagine him saying that!
Emily, I do not know about that.
=============================================
> She must have had some impressive trailer to accommodate even a bumper
> pool table.
=====================================
I don't know the details of exactly where the pool table was kept.
Somewhere on the set I must assume. For sure a trailer or any sort of a
mobile home would not be the place for a pool table.
On the other hand pool aficionados enjoy the game in different ways; perhaps
a precisely level/stable table was unimportant to her as long as she could
stroke some balls around...... In 1991 I was told of his teaching Garland
the game by a chap who was a set/scenes worker for many of Field's movies.
He said Fields was a "quirky" individual to say the least. He was also one
of the greatest jugglers around at that time; he had an unequaled sense of
balance (imperative in a really skilled pocket billiards player).
Yes. W.C. Fields was, as they say, "a little off center". . . ..
Heh, heh, heh, heh. . . . . .
Much like a character around nowadays that goes by the name of Fast Laurie
(or something like that)
McDave
==========================================
It was a misquote about fishing fookin in water, he hinted they pooped
in water, which they do if you have ever cleaned out a fishbowl. He
had a medical syndrome named after him - 'W.C. Fields syndrome',
characterized by rhinophyma (rosacea of the nose) associated with
alcoholism. Keith McCreedy has the same thing today. People like WC
hated water and only drink it if it was quite brown with mostly scotch
in it.
WC was not a little off center, he was a drunk who was smashed all the
time. Drunks do not act normal like me my friend, who nobody has ever
seen me drunk or acting in any manner of that not of the perfect
gentleman. He was a major motion picture star and I have a film of
him playing pool in 1915 in a silent pic.
John Barrymore was one of his drinking pals that would come over to
his weekend get smashed parties at his pool. At the End John slowly
went mad dying in DT's and Errol Flynn took him in to nurse him until
the end came. Both quit drinking after John passes as it affected
both of them greatly. Flynn was back on the sauce in a week but WC
stayed off for a year. It has always been an open debate as to who
could drink the most scotch and still stay standing. It was In like
flynn.
I have the film of wc doing his juggling act in vaudville and he was
world class, plus he had long arms like an orangutang. His best stick
was sheriff honest John. Go to U tube to view it.
His favorite juggling act was to take a cue ball and lay a house stick
out flat holding it on the butt and begin bouncing it into the air
which he could easily do 10 times in a row. When I tried it I would
lose it after 4 or 5. It looks so easy, right, wait and see. I wiped
out half of the lamps in da joint, cue balls were flying all over da
joint bouncing off the head of wonder doggie. .It took me weeks to do
10. On film I did 12 and then 17 and moved on to something else. 17
is another one of my world records I did not even both to claim or
inform bozos land about. Never wise up a chump or give a sucker an
even break my boy, ah yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. He is
doooooooooooooooomed, let him stay that way. It's morally wrong to
allow a sucker to keep his money.
It did give me an appreciation of what the man could do, ah yessssss
indeed my boy, being able to control the ivory up into the air to the
astonishment of all the on looking chumps, marks and bozos was a
thrill for sure. I'll drink to that. But I will drink to anything.
Just don't book me in Phil a del fee I a. I would rather be dead than
there, ah yes.
I drink because I am lonely.
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. Fields
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank
her.
W. C. Fields
Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.
W. C. Fields
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like
having a midget for a butler.
W. C. Fields
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
W. C. Fields
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore
always carry a small snake.
W. C. Fields
Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.
W. C. Fields
Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money,
than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important
than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. Fields
Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.
W. C. Fields
Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
W. C. Fields
Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
W. C. Fields
Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.
W. C. Fields
Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
W. C. Fields
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on
people.
W. C. Fields
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which
I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied
electricity at the state prison.
W. C. Fields
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
W. C. Fields
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. Fields
I drink therefore I am.
W. C. Fields
I like children - fried.
W. C. Fields
I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake,
which I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in
it.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. Fields
I never met a kid I liked.
W. C. Fields
I never worry about being driven to drink; I just worry about being
driven home.
W. C. Fields
I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
W. C. Fields
I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. Fields
I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.).
W. C. Fields
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no
point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. Fields
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
W. C. Fields
If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.
W. C. Fields
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
W. C. Fields
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
W. C. Fields
It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to
thank her for it.
W. C. Fields
It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
W. C. Fields
Last week, I went to Philadelphia, but it was closed.
W. C. Fields
Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a
cold night, she can still survive.
W. C. Fields
My heart is a bargain today. Will you take it?
W. C. Fields
Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.
W. C. Fields
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. Fields
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to
keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
W. C. Fields
No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of
degree.
W. C. Fields
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a
thousand times.
W. C. Fields
On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia.
W. C. Fields
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but
food and water.
W. C. Fields
Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to
swim upstream.
W. C. Fields
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and
for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.
W. C. Fields
Roomservice, Roomservice, don't send up any more ice.
W. C. Fields
Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is
a case of Scotch.
W. C. Fields
Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a
great actress, and you've seen the devil.
W. C. Fields
Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.
W. C. Fields
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's
nothing exactly like it.
W. C. Fields
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. Fields
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. Fields
The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.
W. C. Fields
The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited
breath.
W. C. Fields
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
W. C. Fields
The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would
turn over by themselves.
W. C. Fields
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to
get out of it alive.
W. C. Fields
There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink
it.
W. C. Fields
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by
the tail and face the situation.
W. C. Fields
When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace,
and death a duty.
W. C. Fields
Women are like elephants. I like to look at 'em, but I wouldn't want
to own one.
W. C. Fields
You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
W. C. Fields
Biography for
W.C. Fields
advertisement
Date of Birth
29 January 1880, Darby, Pennsylvania, USA
Date of Death
25 December 1946, Pasadena, California, USA. (stomach hemorrhage)
Birth Name
William Claude Dukenfield
Nickname
Bill
Uncle Claudie (self reference)
Height
5' 8" (1.73 m)
Mini Biography
William Claude Dukenfield was the eldest of five children born to
Cockney immigrant James Dukenfield and Philadelphia native Kate
Felton. He went to school for four years, then quit to work with his
father selling vegetables from a horse cart. At eleven, after many
fights with his alcoholic father (who hit him on the head with a
shovel), he ran away from home. For a while he lived in a hole in the
ground, depending on stolen food and clothing. He was often beaten and
spent nights in jail. His first regular job was delivering ice. By age
thirteen he was a skilled pool player and juggler. It was then, at an
amusement park in Norristown PA, that he was first hired as an
entertainer. There he developed the technique of pretending to lose
the things he was juggling. In 1893 he was employed as a juggler at
Fortescue's Pier, Atlantic City. When business was slow he pretended
to drown in the ocean (management thought his fake rescue would draw
customers). By nineteen he was billed as "The Distinguished Comedian"
and began opening bank accounts in every city he played. At age twenty-
three he opened at the Palace in London and played with Sarah
Bernhardt at Buckingham Palace. He starred at the Folies-Bergere
(young Charles Chaplin and Maurice Chevalier were on the program).
He was in each of the Ziegfeld Follies from 1915 through 1921. He
played for a year in the highly praised musical "Poppy" which opened
in New York in 1923. In 1925 D.W. Griffith made a movie of the play,
renamed Sally of the Sawdust (1925), starring Fields. Pool Sharks
(1915), Fields' first movie, was made when he was thirty-six. He
settled into a mansion near Burbank, California and made most of his
thirty-seven movies for Paramount. He appeared in mostly spontaneous
dialogs on Charlie McCarthy's radio shows. In 1939 he switched to
Universal where he made films written mainly by and for himself. He
died after several serious illnesses, including bouts of pneumonia.
IMDb Mini Biography By: Ed Stephan <ste...@cc.wwu.edu>
Spouse
Harriet Hughes (8 August 1900 - 25 December 1946) (his death) 1 child
Trivia
Interred at Forest Lawn, Glendale, California, USA, in the Great
Mausoleum, Holly Terrace entrance, Hall of Inspiration.
He was the second choice to play the title role in The Wizard of Oz
(1939). There are still some arguments as to why he turned the part
down. Some sources say that he refused to play "The Wizard" because
MGM wouldn't pay the salary he wanted, but according to Doug
McClelland, author of "Down The Yellow Brick Road", Fields was too
busy writing and acting in his latest film for Universal Pictures -
You Can't Cheat an Honest Man (1939) - to be loaned out to MGM to play
the part.
Had a lifetime disdain for music; this he attributed to having to hear
his father's singing day and night as a child, loudest when "the old
patriarch" was drunk. (Companion Carlotta Monti claimed Fields once
hit her with a cane, to stop her humming with a guitar.) When expected
to sing in a role, Fields almost always made a complete farce of both
the lyrics and his performance.
Pictured on a 15¢ US commemorative postage stamp in the Performing
Arts and Artists series, issued 29 January 1980 (100th anniversary
year of his birth).
Grandfather of Ronald J. Fields.
Enshrined in the Juggling Hall of Fame.
The lawyer Larsen E. Pettifogger in the comic strip "Wizard of Id" is
drawn to look like him.
While stories of Fields' alcohol consumption (and the consequences
thereof) were a regular part of his act, and he was rarely seen
without a drink at hand, nobody could recall ever actually seeing him
drunk, or out of control.
Reportedly had hidden microphones installed along the front walk to
his Hollywood home; Fields would slip into a small room to listen to
guests talking as they departed. When someone spoke negatively about
him, Fields would amuse himself by alluding to what they'd said, the
next time he saw them.
Stopped drinking for over a year during his career, when a friend died
of alcohol-related causes, but eventually went back to it.
Fields' wife Hattie became his partner in his juggling act after their
marriage; he sent her home to his parents when she became pregnant.
After Fields returned from the road, they discovered they'd grown
apart, but Hattie wouldn't give him a divorce, and when Fields refused
to "find a regular job", she began badmouthing him to their young son,
William Jr.. Fields predicted that the boy would grow up to see the
truth of the situation (Fields never failed to support his family,
however much or little he was earning)... and it happened. While
father and son rarely saw each other over the years, Fields was
proudly introduced to his firstborn grandson (W.C. Fields III) before
his death.
Could juggle or balance practically anything he could lift or carry;
Fields unnerved his despised mother-in-law by keeping a lit cigar or
candle (in holder) balanced atop his head at mealtimes, never seeming
to notice its presence.
Although one of his most famous quotes is "Never work with animals or
children." he secretly admired children.
Biography in: "Who's Who in Comedy" by Ronald L. Smith, pg. 160-163.
New York: Facts on File, 1992. ISBN 0816023387
Has a medical syndrome named after him - 'W.C. Fields syndrome',
characterized by rhinophyma (rosacea of the nose) associated with
alcoholism.
His wife was born in 1878. She died November 7, 1963.
His son, with wife Hattie, William C. "Claude" Dukenfield,was born on
July 28, 1904. He had another son, born on August 15, 1917, with
girlfriend Bessie Poole, named William Rexford Fields Morris.
Grandchildren: Ruthie, Everett, and Bill.
Appears on sleeve of The Beatles' "Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club
Band".
According to film historians, he performed in only one motion picture
exactly according to script and as directed. That one was MGM's The
Personal History, Adventures, Experience, and Observation of David
Copperfield, the Younger (1935), in which he co-starred with Freddie
Bartholomew, who was only ten years old. Fields admired the Dickens
book, and wanted desperately to play Mr. Micawber in the movie, so he
agreed to forego his usual ad libs, and put aside his distaste at
working with child actors.
Slipped a dose of gin into Baby LeRoy's milk bottle during a movie
shoot, when the set nurse left for a bathroom break; production had to
stop for a day, until he could sober up. (Fields reportedly sent money
later to LeRoy's family, after the boy's screen career ended and they
had financial trouble.)
Usually wrote or co-wrote the screenplays to his movies; the aliases
he used ("Mahatma Kane Jeeves", "Otis Criblecoblis", etc.) for the
writing credits came from the unusual names he encountered on the
road, in his vaudeville days.
Legend has it that on the set of You Can't Cheat an Honest Man (1939),
a stagehand was cleaning out Fields' dressing room and accidentally
bumped into a table on which Fields had placed a bottle of whiskey. He
caught the bottle before it hit the floor, but the cork had popped out
and he couldn't find it. He placed the bottle back on the table and
left. Later Fields came back to the dressing room, and a few minutes
afterwards stormed out, roaring "Who took the cork out of my lunch?"
It was generally assumed that his prominent proboscis was the result
of his drinking, an assumption he himself fueled in his comedy.
However, it is believed to have actually been a physical
characteristic inherited from his mother's side of the family.
Through much of his early career, he was a silent juggler. It wasn't
until he was in his mid-30s that be began to add verbal comedy to his
act
Fields said that the Marx Brothers were the only act he couldn't
follow on the live stage. He is known to have appeared on the same
bill with them only once, during an engagement at Keith's Orpheum
Theatre in Columbus, Ohio, January 1915. At the time, the Marx
Brothers were touring 'Home Again', and it didn't take Fields long to
realize how his quiet comedy juggling act was faring against the
anarchy of the Marxes. Fields later wrote of the engagement (and the
Marxes), "They sang, danced, played harp and kidded in zany style.
Never saw so much nepotism or such hilarious laughter in one act in my
life. The only act I could never follow...I told the manager I broke
my wrist and quit."
Was an accomplished amateur cartoonist. He often provided his own
illustrations for his publicity material during his Vaudeville days,
and sent sketches and self-drawn holiday cards to his friends, all his
life.
Is portrayed by Chuck McCann in Mae West (1982) (TV) and by Rod
Steiger in W.C. Fields and Me (1976)
Lived with Carlotta Monti for fourteen years.
Was good friends with John Barrymore
According to friends, the biggest laugh he ever got as a stage
performer was when a monologue he was giving on-stage was interrupted
by a long, loud crash of objects backstage. After the crashing
stopped, and the audience was silent, Fields gave a one-word comment
in a stage whisper: "Mice!"
Although his marriage to Harriet Hughes lasted until his death in
1946, they separated as early as in 1904.
Father of W. C. Fields, Jr. (b. 1903)
Although he is quoted as saying that he was "The best ballet dancer in
the world.", secretly he was extremely jealous of Charlie Chaplin,
whom he had known when he was younger, for achieving worldwide fame
and adoration.
Rock'n'Roll legend Jerry Lee Lewis has said on several occasions that
W.C. Fields is his favorite comedian.
Personal Quotes
"'Twas a woman drove me to drink. I never had the courtesy to thank
her."
"I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast."
When asked why he never drank water: "I'm afraid it will become habit-
forming."
When asked what he would like his epitaph to read: "on the whole, I'd
rather be in Philadelphia"
(When asked whether he liked children) "Ah yes...boiled or fried."
(When "caught" reading a Bible) "Just looking for loopholes."
"Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which
prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria
than by drinking alcohol?"
"I like, in an audience, the fellow who roars continuously at the
troubles of the character I am portraying on the stage, but he
probably has a mean streak in him and, if I needed ten dollars, he'd
be the last person I'd call upon. I'd go first to the old lady and old
gentleman back in Row S who keep wondering what there is to laugh at."
"Horse sense is what a horse has which keeps it from betting on
people."
"What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?"
"What fiend put pineapple juice in my pineapple juice?"
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then give up. No use
being a damned fool about it."
"Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and
furthermore always carry a small snake."
"Once during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but
food and water."
"What a gorgeous day. What effulgent sunshine. It was a day of this
sort the McGillicuddy brothers murdered their mother with an axe."
"Hell, I never vote for anybody. I always vote against."
"Children should neither be seen nor heard from...ever again."
(looking back on his life) "You know, I'd like to see how I would've
made out without liquor."
"I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally."
"The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his
mother."
"Start every day with a smile, and get it over with."
"I remember Shakespeare's words because he was a great writer. I can't
remember Hollywood lines; just as I may well recall a wonderful meal
at Delmonico's many years ago, but not the contents of the garbage
pail last Tuesday at Joe's Fountain Grill."
"Women are like elephants. They are interesting to look at, but I
wouldn't like to own one."
(on reading the Bible) I admit I scanned it once, searching for some
movie plots...but I found only a pack of wild lies.
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
Marriage is better than leprosy, because it's easier to get rid of.
More people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by
drinking alcohol.
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by
the tail and face the situation.
(About comedian Bert Williams) "He was the funniest man I ever saw,
and the saddest man I ever knew."
On Chaplin: "He's the best ballet dancer in the World."
"Hollywood is the gold cap on a tooth that should have been pulled out
years ago."
"I gargle with whiskey several times a day, and I haven't had a cold
in years."
"The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart."
"After two days in the hospital, I took a turn for the nurse."
"The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep."
Salary
The Big Broadcast of 1938 (1938) $20,000
The Dentist (1932) $5,000/week
Fast Laurie;
Well, you've finally done it !!! Produced a post that I truly found
interesting. There's a lot of stuff in this one that even I had not heard
of before. Of course, when I knew him I was only 5 years old and we never
talked of serious stuff. In fact, he did not even like to talk to little
kids such as I was; just preparing to go into the First Grade of Elementary
School. I remember him telling me once; "Children !!! The ONLY thing
they're good for is spreading diseeeeeeeas; yess, that's the only
thing - - - - ...... "
You post is so good that I'm going to re-post it with a better subject-line
so that many more will benefit from it.
McDave
=======================================================================
"Fast Larry" <fast...@gmail.com> wrote in message
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