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Holiday shopping survival horror

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harmfulguy

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:29:07 PM11/21/09
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Is there any reliable way to distinguish between the average mall shopper
and a zombie, that won't get me ejected from the mall and/or arrested?

Dr. Phineas J. Martian

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:46:50 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 21, 2:29 pm, harmfulguy <harmful...@considered-harmful.org>
wrote:

> Is there any reliable way to distinguish between the average mall shopper
> and a zombie, that won't get me ejected from the mall and/or arrested?

Wave a dollar in their face and see if they go for it or your brain.
If they go for your brain, take their wallet and move on.

Popess Pantiara Evokovitch

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:53:39 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 21, 5:29 pm, harmfulguy <harmful...@considered-harmful.org>
wrote:

> Is there any reliable way to distinguish between the average mall shopper
> and a zombie, that won't get me ejected from the mall and/or arrested?

Shoot them in the arm. If they scream, they're human, if they die,
they're a zombie.
Oh, that WON'T

Popess Pantiara Evokovitch

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:54:50 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 21, 5:53 pm, Popess Pantiara Evokovitch <panti...@gmail.com>
wrote:

fuck, hit the send key.
What i meant was:
Oh, that WON'T get you arrested.... oooohhh. Well nevermind.

Popess Pantiara Evokovitch

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:56:06 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 21, 5:54 pm, Popess Pantiara Evokovitch <panti...@gmail.com>

FUCK! AND IT WASN'T EVEN RIGHT!!!
Gaaaahhh! Ok, this is what I really meant to say:

Shoot them in the arm. If they scream, they're human, if they keep
going for your brain, they're a zombie.

Don Stockbauer

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Nov 21, 2009, 5:58:54 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 21, 4:56 pm, Popess Pantiara Evokovitch <panti...@gmail.com>

Just go to the mall, put on a blank expression to match everyone else,
you'll do fine.

Toilet Pepper

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Nov 21, 2009, 6:11:09 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 22, 6:56 am, Popess Pantiara Evokovitch <panti...@gmail.com>

What the sweet lady was trying to say is shoot everybody. Everyone is
a zombie except you.

NeuroManson

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Nov 21, 2009, 6:14:03 PM11/21/09
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"Popess Pantiara Evokovitch" <pant...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:9d7e631e-6899-4a5b...@g27g2000yqn.googlegroups.com...

-----------
tl:dr


Popess Pantiara Evokovitch

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Nov 21, 2009, 6:18:01 PM11/21/09
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whenever anyone calls me "lady" all i can think of is:
"OOYYYman, sweet LAAYYYdyyyy!!"
(Jerry Lewis.. apparently...)

Rev. Richard Skull

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Nov 21, 2009, 6:45:28 PM11/21/09
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On Nov 21, 5:29 pm, harmfulguy <harmful...@considered-harmful.org>
wrote:
> Is there any reliable way to distinguish between the average mall shopper
> and a zombie, that won't get me ejected from the mall and/or arrested?

The best way is to use an axe of pic-mattack.

Hit the suspected Zombie in the head with it. IF it falls over with
lots of blood and barins, its a Pink Shopper.

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