The dream of pickled okra

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Jacob W. Haller

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Nov 16, 2002, 8:46:54 AM11/16/02
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James Bond has been CAPTURED! So I go to the castle where he's being
held, along with the beautiful journalist I met up with earlier at
school, where there was a sort of recital where you had to tell a riddle
and sing a Peter Gabriel song. (My riddle was, "Why are sandwiches
sometimes gritty? Because of the sand which is there." My Peter
Gabriel song was "In Your Eyes".)

At the castle, the guards catch us, but I manage to escape. I run
around and find the journalist and we make it to the exit. But there's
an earthquake and the bridge that leads from the castle to the
surrounding land doesn't quit reach, so we have to jump for it! We make
it, but then we see that the mountain that the castle is on is actually
a volcano, and that the volcano is erupting! The castle is about to be
consumed in lava! The journalist and I look at each other. "We have to
go back and save the others," I say, and she nods agreement.

We go through the castle and free all the prisoners, who all make it to
safety. (Except I don't see James Bond anywhere for some reason.) The
one problem is Ray Charles, who, being blind, can't see the volcano or
anything and refuses to believe that he's in any danger. After some
argument back and forth, I finally pick him up bodily and jump across
the gap in the bridge. We make it across safely, and as we collapse on
the other side, Ray sings a short bit of gospel-tinged scat singing:
"Oh-oh-whooooah."

-jwgh

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"PS. Please take note of the fact that, in conformity with the
regulations of this office, all information contained in the above
letter is false, for reasons of military security."
- Umberto Eco, /How to Travel with a Salmon & Other Essays/

Leo Sgouros

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Nov 16, 2002, 11:48:34 AM11/16/02
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Jacob W. Haller <sp...@jwgh.org> wrote in message
news:1flqg9n.br3eh9ge15iqN%sp...@jwgh.org...

<snip sequence>

>
> We go through the castle and free all the prisoners, who all make it to
> safety. (Except I don't see James Bond anywhere for some reason.) The
> one problem is Ray Charles, who, being blind, can't see the volcano or
> anything and refuses to believe that he's in any danger. After some
> argument back and forth, I finally pick him up bodily and jump across
> the gap in the bridge. We make it across safely, and as we collapse on
> the other side, Ray sings a short bit of gospel-tinged scat singing:
> "Oh-oh-whooooah."
>

Dear Jacob,

I have been singing with my parish for years now and not once have they,
or I for that matter, ever composed or "belted out" a church-themed (or
church approved, for that matter)ditty about poop.
Your fan,
Laszlo Pallazo

talysman

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Nov 16, 2002, 2:48:48 PM11/16/02
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sp...@jwgh.org (Jacob W. Haller) writes:

> James Bond has been CAPTURED!

and Jake has to rescue him from the lava!

> We go through the castle and free all the prisoners, who all make it to
> safety. (Except I don't see James Bond anywhere for some reason.) The
> one problem is Ray Charles, who, being blind, can't see the volcano or
> anything and refuses to believe that he's in any danger.

you should have stuck his hand in the lava. THEN he'd believe!

either that, or learn to speak braille before dreaming.

Zixia

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Nov 16, 2002, 3:01:10 PM11/16/02
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talysman devised a cunning plan:

> sp...@jwgh.org (Jacob W. Haller) writes:
>
>> We go through the castle and free all the prisoners, who all make
>> it to safety. (Except I don't see James Bond anywhere for some
>> reason.) The one problem is Ray Charles, who, being blind, can't
>> see the volcano or anything and refuses to believe that he's in
>> any danger.
>
> you should have stuck his hand in the lava. THEN he'd believe!

Or just pull out the Glaive before opening his eyes to reveal that he
has been replaced by the Beast in another ruse to kill Prince Colwyn.

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