The only worthwhile art is art that's where it shouldn't be.
James Kibo Parry
->
-> Man smuggles own art into MoMA
->
-> NEW YORK (Reuters) -- Many a visitor to New York's Museum of
-> Modern Art has probably thought, "I could do that."
You know, I _could_ make money overcharging for bad cafeteria food...
-> A British graffiti artist who goes by the name "Banksy" went one
-> step further, by smuggling in his own picture of a soup can and
-> hanging it on a wall, where it stayed for more than three days
-> earlier this month before anybody noticed.
Prank-tacular!
I think I'm in love, even if he's British.
-> The prank was part of a coordinated plan to infiltrate four of
-> New York's top museums on a single day.
->
-> The largest piece, which he smuggled into the Brooklyn Museum, was
-> a 2 foot by 1.5 foot (61cm by 46 cm) oil painting of a
-> colonial-era admiral, to which the artist had added a can of spray
-> paint in his hand and anti-war graffiti in the background.
->
-> The other two targets were the Metropolitan Museum of Art and the
-> American Museum of Natural History, where he hung a glass-encased
-> beetle with fighter jet wings and missiles attached to its body --
-> another comment on war, Banksy told Reuters on Thursday.
->
-> "It was just an outsider's view of the modern American bug,
-> bristling with listening devices and military hardware," he said.
But inside a bug, it's too dark to read.
-> An art Web site called woostercollective.com has posted pictures
-> of the artist -- wearing an Inspector Clouseau-style overcoat, a
-> hat and a fake beard and nose -- hanging up his work at the four
-> museums and describing how he did it.
He made the front page of the New York Times too, right below
"INDIA ALTERS LAW ON DRUG PATENTS" and the price barcode.
Hey, maybe the Indian parliament didn't actually alter the law
on drug patents -- maybe some guy just snuck a new law into the
stack of real ones.
Mr. Banksy, sir, I humbly suggest that your next work of art should
involve sneaking an amendment into the United States Constitution
giving me all the candy in the world.
-> Speaking by telephone from an undisclosed location in Britain,
-> Banksy said he conducted all four operations on March 13, helped
-> by accomplices who filmed him and provided distractions where
-> necessary.
->
-> "They staged a gay tiff (lovers' quarrel), shouting very loudly
-> and obnoxiously," said the artist, declining to give his real name
-> or any personal details beyond his occupation as a professional
-> painter and decorator.
Reuters, the news service for people who don't know what the words
"gay" or "tiff" mean.
By the way, Banksy, I'm available, and I promise I will never have
an _unscripted_ gay tiff with you, as long as you get that amendment
into the Constitution for me.
-> It is not the first time he has staged such stunts.
->
-> Last year he smuggled work into the Louvre in Paris and London's
-> Tate, attracting attention in the British media.
->
-> "My sister inspired me to do it. She was throwing away loads of my
-> pictures one day and I asked her why. She said 'It's not like
-> they're going to be hanging in the Louvre."'
->
-> He took that as a challenge. "I thought why wait until I'm dead,"
-> he said.
Museums normally have a rule that they can't put you on their wall
until ten years after your death, unless you were President.
-> His preferred creative outlet, graffiti on trains, was growing
-> more difficult due to greater security so he decided to branch out
-> into infiltrating museums. "I tend to gravitate to places with
-> less sophisticated security systems," he said.
He should go after the Boston subway system. Worst that could happen
is one of the cops might tell him "If I see you doing that again,
I might take away your spray paint!"
-> Officials at the Natural History Museum declined to comment on
-> security. Museum of Modern Art officials said only that the
-> offending picture was taken down on March 17.
->
-> It was unclear what gave the game away but Banksy's version of
-> Andy Warhol's iconic images of Campbell's Soup Cans showed a can
-> of Tesco value tomato soup, a discounted brand sold by a British
-> supermarket chain.
...as opposed to regular Campbell's, which is the world's highest-quality
food product, except for the fact that it's basically yellow salt water
with one tiny piece of rubberized pigeon cartilage in every can.
(And that's just their tomato soup.)
-> "Obviously they've got their eye a lot more on things leaving than
-> things going in which works in my favor," Banksy said. "I imagine
-> they'll be doing stricter bag checks now."
New idea: Go in wearing a temporary tattoo. Peel it off. Put it on
Whistler's Mother's ass. Retitle the painting "Whistler's Mother's
Ass's Butterfly Of Love".
-> He said the painting in the Metropolitan Museum, a small portrait
-> of a woman wearing a gas mask, had been discovered after one day,
-> while the others stayed up for several days. The paintings were
-> fixed to the wall with extra-strong glue.
In my mind, gas mask plus Krazy Glue equals fine art no matter where
you combine the two. Like, you could glue a gas mask to Andy Rooney's
face and that would be art. Or you could glue Andy Rooney to a gas
mask and that would be art. Or you could glue Andy Rooney to a toilet
while you're wearing a gas mask and that would definitely be art.
-> Asked how he managed to escape notice while putting them up on a
-> busy Sunday at the museums, he said: "They do get pretty full, but
-> not if you put the pictures in the boring bits."
I make this solemn promise to alt.religion.kibology:
Next time I'm in an art museum, I will Krazy Glue a picture of
Andy Rooney above one of the toilets. I don't think they'd let
me wear a gas mask, though, no matter how badly you need them
in stinky museum restrooms. (Degas gives nerds de gas.)
-- K.
Are staged gay tiffs inherently
more distracting than staged
straight tiffs? If so, is that
good or bad?
Karlo X
24030520...@10.0.1.2:
> Reuters, the news service for people who don't know what the words
> "gay" or "tiff" mean.
Maybe they've only seen jpegs.
k.
--
"In spite of everything, I still believe that people are
really good at heart." - Anne Frank
Joseph Michael Bay
>New idea: Go in wearing a temporary tattoo. Peel it off. Put it on
>Whistler's Mother's ass. Retitle the painting "Whistler's Mother's
>Ass's Butterfly Of Love".
Whistler's Mother's Ass's Elusive Butterfly of Love.
--
Chimes peal joy. Bah. Joseph Michael Bay
Icy colon barge Cancer Biology
Frosty divine Saturn Stanford University
www.stanford.edu/~jmbay/ got my mojo properly adjusted
Glenn Knickerbocker
> -> Man smuggles own art into MoMA
Sadly, he probably didn't even know he'd been outdone by TV already. In
a February episode of "Committed," the disappointing new sitcom about
crazy people featuring Tom Poston as a senile clown who can never find a
can opener, the main character's mother snuck off from a mental
institution to hang on a coathook in an installation at the Guggenheim,
in protest of bad art.
ŹR
Kevin S. Wilson
Michael Bay) wrote:
>ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry) writes:
>
>
>>New idea: Go in wearing a temporary tattoo. Peel it off. Put it on
>>Whistler's Mother's ass. Retitle the painting "Whistler's Mother's
>>Ass's Butterfly Of Love".
>
>Whistler's Mother's Ass's Elusive Butterfly of Love.
Worst Iron Butterfly song EVER!