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The revolutionary new video game system that is revolutionary and new!

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Jacob W. Haller

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Jan 4, 2004, 4:07:21 PM1/4/04
to
Introducing the new video game platform that will blow all the old ones
away -- P.L.A.T.O.(tm)!

P.L.A.T.O. stands for Perennially Luminous And Terrific Overmind! It's
the gaming platform so visionary, so amazing, so mind-bendingly perfect,
that it doesn't have any graphics or user interface -- because it
doesn't need them! In fact, having graphics or user interface would
merely mar the perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.!

P.L.A.T.O. comes in many forms, shapes, and sizes, one to suit any
red-blooded American or green-blooded Vulcan! Pick the big
Barcalounger(tm) model, which doubles as a Barcalounger, and nap while
your pulse races as you play the most awesomest video games possible!
Take your P.L.A.T.O. in capsule form and get that extra bolt of
nutrition you need as you take on the conceptual action-based wizardry
strategoism perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.! Release the gaseous form of
P.L.A.T.O. and imbibe its gentle fragrance as you race down the
reflex-challenging mental labyrinth of P.L.A.T.O.! Bath in P.L.A.T.O.'s
gentle rays, and be content!

Buy P.L.A.T.O. now, or be proven genetically inferior forever!
Available soon at Toys R Us and Staples.

-jwgh

--
"I don't advocate responding to rudeness with rudeness, but inducing
fear is always a good option."
-- Paula on alt.religion.kibology, 30 November 2003

swt

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Jan 4, 2004, 5:35:31 PM1/4/04
to
"Jacob W. Haller" <yo...@jwgh.org> wrote in message
news:1g71ogu.74uf4g120uuskN%yo...@jwgh.org...

> Introducing the new video game platform that will blow all the old ones
> away -- P.L.A.T.O.(tm)!

The VIRTUCONE! From Mishima Corporation, in DowntownTokyo!

> P.L.A.T.O. stands for Perennially Luminous And Terrific Overmind! It's
> the gaming platform so visionary, so amazing, so mind-bendingly perfect,
> that it doesn't have any graphics or user interface -- because it
> doesn't need them! In fact, having graphics or user interface would
> merely mar the perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.!

In Utah, there is a building just off I-15 with a sign that says:

VIRTUAL GOLF BARN

I laugh now just thinking about it. I think adding "barn" to almost
anything makes it funny. Dragon Barn. CIA Barn. Ninja Barn. Crunchy Corn
Barn. "Women's Dress Barn" (another actual Utah store) cracks me up,
because (a) "barn" connotes livestock, not fashion, and (b) "women's"?.

I mean to say, really. "Women's"?

> P.L.A.T.O. comes in many forms, shapes, and sizes, one to suit any
> red-blooded American or green-blooded Vulcan! Pick the big
> Barcalounger(tm) model, which doubles as a Barcalounger, and nap while
> your pulse races as you play the most awesomest video games possible!

Note that, in the unregistered version, it takes an extra five minutes to
get to sleep.

> Take your P.L.A.T.O. in capsule form and get that extra bolt of
> nutrition you need as you take on the conceptual action-based wizardry

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

This is where I realized this was a troll. Wizardry was an RPG, not an
action game. Please check your facts before posting nonsense to USENET!

> strategoism perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.! Release the gaseous form of
> P.L.A.T.O. and imbibe its gentle fragrance as you race down the
> reflex-challenging mental labyrinth of P.L.A.T.O.! Bath in P.L.A.T.O.'s
> gentle rays, and be content!

Student: But what if the cave is just a shadow in another cave?
Socrates: There are some mysteries that are hidden from we mortals.
Student: Has the hemlock kicked in?
Socrates: Fear not, I collected enough silver coins, and now I have an extra
life. Thanks, P.L.A.T.O.!

> Buy P.L.A.T.O. now, or be proven genetically inferior forever!
> Available soon at Toys R Us and Staples.

New from LaO tSu!

Zero-day philosophy!

Download now!

Update all information and pod into cosmos!

--
swt (http://members.cox.net/swt2/)
Urgg... Break Dancing Leprecauns = Yuk! - Wilbur the Once


Paula

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Jan 4, 2004, 5:50:54 PM1/4/04
to
On Sun, 4 Jan 2004 16:07:21 -0500, yo...@jwgh.org (Jacob W. Haller)
wrote:

>Introducing the new video game platform that will blow all the old ones
>away -- P.L.A.T.O.(tm)!
>
>P.L.A.T.O. stands for Perennially Luminous And Terrific Overmind! It's
>the gaming platform so visionary, so amazing, so mind-bendingly perfect,
>that it doesn't have any graphics or user interface -- because it
>doesn't need them! In fact, having graphics or user interface would
>merely mar the perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.!
>
>P.L.A.T.O. comes in many forms, shapes, and sizes, one to suit any
>red-blooded American or green-blooded Vulcan! Pick the big
>Barcalounger(tm) model, which doubles as a Barcalounger, and nap while
>your pulse races as you play the most awesomest video games possible!
>Take your P.L.A.T.O. in capsule form and get that extra bolt of
>nutrition you need as you take on the conceptual action-based wizardry
>strategoism perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.! Release the gaseous form of
>P.L.A.T.O. and imbibe its gentle fragrance as you race down the
>reflex-challenging mental labyrinth of P.L.A.T.O.! Bath in P.L.A.T.O.'s
>gentle rays, and be content!
>
>Buy P.L.A.T.O. now, or be proven genetically inferior forever!
>Available soon at Toys R Us and Staples.

You've been watching a lot of late night teevee lately, haven't you?
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

--
Paula
"How Assur's gonads became a letter of the Roman alphabet 8000 years
after he lived is too long a story to tell it all here."
(www.resurrectisis.org/B1WebPage.htm)

Glenn Knickerbocker

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Jan 4, 2004, 10:17:30 PM1/4/04
to
On Sun, 4 Jan 2004 14:35:31 -0800, swt wrote:
>Barn. "Women's Dress Barn" (another actual Utah store) cracks me up,
>because (a) "barn" connotes livestock, not fashion, and (b) "women's"?.

Uh, Dress Barn is a national chain originating in Stamford, Connecticut,
and Dress Barn Woman is their "large sizes" store or section (as opposed
to Misses and Petites). I think "barn" was really intended to connote
(a) simple, informal styles (their mission statement says "style is about
character, not about expensive labels") and (b) too many of them to fit
in the house. While "Woman" does fall in the WORST EUPHEMISM EVER
category, that's far too pathetic for it actually to be funny. Not from
a clocktower, anyway.

ŹR http://users.bestweb.net/~notr/cats "Would you like to watch a movie
about George Wendt while eating Chinese food with a cat?" --Andy Simmons

Madge

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Jan 5, 2004, 11:43:36 AM1/5/04
to
Jacob W. Haller wrote:
>
> Introducing the new video game platform that will blow all the old ones
> away -- P.L.A.T.O.(tm)!

I got a pefectly good piece of string, (Colour=Yellow, Length=13cm and
one end chewed), THANKYOUVERYMUCH and I dont need any high tech
medication or sedation.

--
http://www.coolfrenchcomics.com/index.html

Jacob W. Haller

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Jan 5, 2004, 11:54:02 AM1/5/04
to
Madge <deletethisbit...@yahoo.com> wrote:

> I got a pefectly good piece of string, (Colour=Yellow, Length=13cm and
> one end chewed), THANKYOUVERYMUCH and I dont need any high tech
> medication or sedation.

I had no idea they could do that with ordinary string.

Madge

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Jan 5, 2004, 12:05:18 PM1/5/04
to
Jacob W. Haller wrote:
>
> Madge <deletethisbit...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> > I got a pefectly good piece of string, (Colour=Yellow, Length=13cm and
> > one end chewed), THANKYOUVERYMUCH and I dont need any high tech
> > medication or sedation.
>
> I had no idea they could do that with ordinary string.
>
> -jwgh
>

http://www.string.org/ <--- Now thats kiboligical

--
http://www.coolfrenchcomics.com/index.html

robert lindsay

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Jan 6, 2004, 12:27:18 AM1/6/04
to
On Sun, 04 Jan 2004 16:07:21 -0500, Jacob W. Haller wrote:

> Introducing the new video game platform that will blow all the old ones
> away -- P.L.A.T.O.(tm)!
>
> P.L.A.T.O. stands for Perennially Luminous And Terrific Overmind! It's
> the gaming platform so visionary, so amazing, so mind-bendingly perfect,
> that it doesn't have any graphics or user interface -- because it
> doesn't need them! In fact, having graphics or user interface would
> merely mar the perfection that is P.L.A.T.O.!

Blazemonger 'customer service' does this better than you.

James Kibo Parry

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Jan 6, 2004, 7:37:13 PM1/6/04
to
"swt" (sw...@cox.net) wrote:
>
> In Utah, there is a building just off I-15 with a sign that says:
>
> VIRTUAL GOLF BARN
>
> I laugh now just thinking about it. I think adding "barn" to almost
> anything makes it funny. Dragon Barn. CIA Barn. Ninja Barn. Crunchy Corn
> Barn. "Women's Dress Barn" (another actual Utah store) cracks me up,
> because (a) "barn" connotes livestock, not fashion, and (b) "women's"?.
>
> I mean to say, really. "Women's"?

Let's test your theory.

Lint Barn

Potato Barn

Map Barn

Underoos Barn

Hermit Crab Repellent Barn

Fart Barn

I'm not sure the barn really makes the fart that much funnier.

-- K.

However, Steve Allen would
tell you that "Bart Farn" would
be the funniest thing ever.

Whosetitanelbow

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Jan 6, 2004, 10:02:26 PM1/6/04
to
bar...@bookpro.com schreef in
berichtnieuws...news:btfnvb$e5k$2...@news1.radix.net:

>>Lint Barn
>
> and Hatchery
>
>
Quit making fun of Idaho!

--
"So the gamers and the scammers say it's the fault of the critics who tried
to carve through the mumbo-jumbo in the first place." -- Josh Marshall

Whosetitanelbow

unread,
Jan 7, 2004, 1:41:44 PM1/7/04
to
bar...@bookpro.com schreef in
berichtnieuws...news:bth05i$15v$2...@news1.radix.net:

> On 7 Jan 2004 03:02:26 GMT, Whosetitanelbow


><crgre02...@newsguy.com> wrote:
>
>>bar...@bookpro.com schreef in
>>berichtnieuws...news:btfnvb$e5k$2...@news1.radix.net:
>>
>>>>Lint Barn
>>>
>>> and Hatchery
>>>
>>>
>>Quit making fun of Idaho!
>

> Oh, all right. Is it okay if I make fun of Aldous Huxley instead?
>
> BW
>

END SOMA DANGLING!

robert lindsay

unread,
Jan 8, 2004, 12:10:29 AM1/8/04
to
On Wed, 07 Jan 2004 18:41:44 +0000, Whosetitanelbow wrote:

> bar...@bookpro.com schreef in
> berichtnieuws...news:bth05i$15v$2...@news1.radix.net:
>
>> On 7 Jan 2004 03:02:26 GMT, Whosetitanelbow
>><crgre02...@newsguy.com> wrote:
>>
>>>bar...@bookpro.com schreef in
>>>berichtnieuws...news:btfnvb$e5k$2...@news1.radix.net:
>>>
>>>>>Lint Barn
>>>>
>>>> and Hatchery
>>>>
>>>>
>>>Quit making fun of Idaho!
>>
>> Oh, all right. Is it okay if I make fun of Aldous Huxley instead?
>>
>> BW
>>
>
> END SOMA DANGLING!

IN YOUR OWB PRIVATE IDAHO!!!!!

Schwa Love

unread,
Jan 11, 2004, 3:30:09 AM1/11/04
to
ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry) wrote in
news:kibo-06010...@10.0.1.2:

> "swt" (sw...@cox.net) wrote:
>>
>> In Utah, there is a building just off I-15 with a sign that says:
>>
>> VIRTUAL GOLF BARN
>>
>> I laugh now just thinking about it. I think adding "barn" to almost
>> anything makes it funny. Dragon Barn. CIA Barn. Ninja Barn.
>> Crunchy Corn Barn. "Women's Dress Barn" (another actual Utah store)
>> cracks me up, because (a) "barn" connotes livestock, not fashion,
>> and (b) "women's"?.
>>
>> I mean to say, really. "Women's"?
>
> Let's test your theory.
>
> Lint Barn
>
> Potato Barn
>
> Map Barn
>
> Underoos Barn
>
> Hermit Crab Repellent Barn
>
> Fart Barn
>
> I'm not sure the barn really makes the fart that much funnier.

Barn Barn.

Nope, that one just doesn't work for me. Perhaps it's one of those, "Sets
that contain all sets except sets that contain themselves," sort of things.

-- Schwa ---

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