College: Puking and Learning
BlakXXJack
It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
getting involved, i.e. drinking. The magic is officially gone for me; a bunch
of college kids standing around getting drunk seemed somehow more enchanting
before tonight. Anyway, I left the residence hall and came back to my room to
think, "Gosh, how nice it is away from all the drunks." My mistake.
There's a knock at the door, and I answer it to find my roommate leaning
on a poor upperclassman named Erin. I have to find her tomorrow to thank her
for getting the roommate back safely. Anyway, she asks me to detach the
roommate from her, and I do so, making sure he isn't in any immediate danger.
I tell him, "Mark, you should drink some water before you get to sleep. You
need to rehydrate, and flush some of the toxins from your system." He goes to
bed, waving away my advice.
Half an hour later, I wake up to hear him retching, and I resist the urge
to say I told you so. I go get him a cup of water so he can start on the
journey to wellness once more, and he drinks a bit of it before dumping the
rest out into a sink in the bathroom before taking a shower. I will never see
that cup again. I don't want to see that cup again. It is the only item I own
that has ever been caked in someone else's vomit, and I thus feel it should be
discarded. Anyway, one of his friends comes into the room, looking for him.
The friend needs a partner for ping-pong. I explain that there is a lot of
vomit on his bed, and he helps me get the sheets off the bed before the stuff
sinks into the mattress. This is the point at which I have to involve the
resident assistant.
Our RA on this floor believes in the moral righteousness of the 21
drinking age. I'm not sure whether this is a good thing since he seems more
worried about the legality of heavy underage drinking than the healtiness of
it. Anyway, the RA helps me get cleaning supplies, through a myriad
bureaucracy, and interrogates Mark about where he was drinking, when he was
drinking, with whom he was drinking, and where he got the drink. He gave
appropriately obfuscatory replies, since he was drinking with friends and I'm
fairly sure one of those friends is old enough to buy liquor and is therefore
very culpable in this matter. I cleared my own name in the matter,
fortunately, and I came to fully appreciate the wisdom of deciding not to drink
tonight. Mark talked to the RA, and then to the area manager, and then to
another RA who I think is the head for our building. I got to clean up the
puke that dripped onto the floor, unfortunately. The room still smells like
disinfectant, which is better than it smelled before.
I know I'm just a college freshman, with a scant 18 years of experience in
this crazy, mixed-up world... but I implore you: drink in moderation. I hate
thinking that Mark might be even worse off if Erin hadn't brought him back from
wherever he was busy getting wasted. When you do drink, get lots of water
after you're done having fun. Your body will be grateful. And don't puke in
your bed. I think that last bit's self-explanatory.
--Mouschi
Beable van Polasm
>
> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here
> on campus. It's the first week I've been here at college, and
> classes start on Tuesday. This is the first big college party of
> the year. I decide to observe without getting involved,
> i.e. drinking.
NOT DRINKING! PL~NK!!!
cheers
Beable van Polasm
--
THE MORE YOU RUN OVER A DEAD CAT, THE FLATTER IT GETS. -- David Pacheco
IQC 78189333
Hong Ooi
> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on campus.
> It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
>This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
>getting involved, i.e. drinking.
NOT DRINKING!!!! PLQNK!
--
Hong Ooi | "Then we went in and watched some porn
hong...@maths.anu.edu.au | on our TV of Plenty."
http://www.zip.com.au/~hong | -- dp
Canberra, Australia |
Ben Wolfson
> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on campus.
> It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
>This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
>getting involved, i.e. drinking.
Not drinking! Anti-PL*NK!
--
Barnabas T. Rumjuggler
You're going to set me up as a kind of slovenly attached pig that
Jack Kornfeld can slice down in his violent zen compassion?
-- Larry Block
Matt McIrvin
blakx...@aol.com (BlakXXJack) wrote:
> I will never see that cup again. I don't want to see that cup again.
> It is the only item I own that has ever been caked in someone else's
> vomit, and I thus feel it should be discarded. Anyway, one of his
> friends comes into the room, looking for him. The friend needs a
> partner for ping-pong. I explain that there is a lot of vomit on his
> bed, and he helps me get the sheets off the bed before the stuff
> sinks into the mattress. This is the point at which I have to
> involve the resident assistant.
Man, am I glad I'm out of college.
Worst I ever saw personally was a guy who, against the advice of
everybody, persisted in mixing alcohol and Xanax. Once he lost bowel
control.
--
Matt McIrvin
Brian 'Jarai' Chase
BlakXXJack <blakx...@aol.com> wrote:
> [...]
> I know I'm just a college freshman, with a scant 18 years of experience in
> this crazy, mixed-up world... but I implore you: drink in moderation. I hate
> thinking that Mark might be even worse off if Erin hadn't brought him back from
> wherever he was busy getting wasted. When you do drink, get lots of water
> after you're done having fun. Your body will be grateful. And don't puke in
> your bed. I think that last bit's self-explanatory.
http://www.thefirsttwins.com/#partyanimal
Everybody is doing it.
-jarai.
--
--- Brian Chase | b...@world.std.com | http://world.std.com/~bdc/ -----
Tip: In a post-apocalyptic future,
NEVER CHALLENGE THE AUTHORITY OF ANYONE WHOSE NAME IS
"THE ___ MASTER". -- K.
Joseph Michael Bay
> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on campus.
> It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
>This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
>getting involved, i.e. drinking.
NOT DRINKING! PL()NK!
This time I don't want to catch anyone NOT DRINKING
--
"Congress shall make no law ... abridging the freedom of sXXXch, Joe
.. or the right of the people peaceably to XXXemble, and to Bay
peXXXion the government for a redress of grievances." at Stanford
-- from the First Amendment to the US ConsXXXution University
Conmidhe
-C()|\|
>A giant has been awakened and will not be deterrred:
> http://albums.photopoint.com/j/View?u=1297955&a=12581901&p=54149362
>Today we mourn for Superman,
>And all the illusions we'll never have again
>Lying in the arms of a weeping Uncle Sam
>Who is wiping eyes and preparing to stand.
> ~Keith Seher~
cave deum
> It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
>This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
>getting involved, i.e. drinking.
NOT DRINKING! KRANG!! <-- NOT PLONK!!! HAW HAW!!!@
rone
--
Looking for God's underpants since 1985. <ro...@ennui.org>
Jim Vandewalker
{ In article <20010916030146...@mb-cg.aol.com>,
{ BlakXXJack <blakx...@aol.com> wrote:
{ > So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on
campus.
{ > It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on
Tuesday.
{ >This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
{ >getting involved, i.e. drinking.
{
{ NOT DRINKING! KRANG!! <-- NOT CYBAX!!! HAW HAW!!!@
{
KRANG!! NOT ROT 13!!1!! <-- CYBAX!!11! UNJ UNJ!!!
--
Jim the Qrnq Thl
Rid
>In article <20010916030146...@mb-cg.aol.com>,
>BlakXXJack <blakx...@aol.com> wrote:
>> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on campus.
>> It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
>>This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
>>getting involved, i.e. drinking.
>
>NOT DRINKING! KRANG!! <-- NOT PLONK!!! HAW HAW!!!@
Ahyes Krang...
http://www.ninjaturtles.com/html/profil11.htm
one of the more underrated villians in the ninja turtle universe but a
worthy foe nonetheless. a denizen of dimension x he was unfairly
overshadowed by shredder in the villany stakes. mainly due to his
rather diminutive stature.
mock not the undersized pink ones from dimension x!
Beable van Polasm
>
> KRANG!! NOT ROT 13!!1!! <-- CYBAX!!11! UNJ UNJ!!!
Hmmmm. UNJ UNJ! I LIKE IT! UNJ UNJ P00GRE!!1!
cheers
Beable van Polasm
--
I bought a head of Babbage in the grocery store today, it didn't invent any
computers. -- Riboflavin
IQC 78189333
Dag Right-square-bracket-gren
"CYBAX"?
BEST ROT-13 EVER!!!1!!
--
Dag Agren <> d...@c3.cx <> http://www.abo.fi/~dagren/ <> Legalize oregano
The time is nigh / I dreamed a lake
It's greek to me / Your pants are down
Whose Titan Elbow
> In article
> <jim.vandewalker-ya023...@news.newsguy.com>
> you wrote:
>> In article <rone.9o3886$3up$1...@ennui.org>, "cave deum"
>> <^#*&$@ennui.org> wrote:
>
>> { NOT DRINKING! KRANG!! <-- NOT CYBAX!!! HAW HAW!!!@
>
>> KRANG!! NOT ROT 13!!1!! <-- CYBAX!!11! UNJ UNJ!!!
>
> "CYBAX"?
>
> BEST ROT-13 EVER!!!1!!
>
Also, the only commodity exchange to close UP today AND a
healthful source of over 200 essential and non-essential LIVING
GREEN NUTRIENTS!!!
--
CRGRE
``???? Regime phase? thought ? '' -- from Manley Hubbell's
last known transmission
Joseph Michael Bay
>blakx...@aol.com (BlakXXJack) writes:
>>
>> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here
>> on campus. It's the first week I've been here at college, and
>> classes start on Tuesday. This is the first big college party of
>> the year. I decide to observe without getting involved,
>> i.e. drinking.
>NOT DRINKING! PL~NK!!!
NICHT TRINKEN! *PATSCH!*
--
Chimes peal joy. Bah. Joseph Michael Bay
Icy colon barge Cancer Biology
Frosty divine Saturn Stanford University
When encryption is outlawed, fO$t ^@3sVe) %4iG Vx@| /jNGe5x6@^.
Joshua E Millard
>Beable van Polasm <bea...@my-deja.com> writes:
>>NOT DRINKING! PL~NK!!!
>NICHT TRINKEN! *PATSCH!*
NICE TRINKET! +++PANSY!+++
--
+---+ With great effort, you move the boulder. ################
|..$| # Josh Millard #
|.@'.##########################################################
|<d.| # pu...@wpi.edu # www.wpi.edu/~pulp - music, words, etc #
+---+ ########################################################
Daniel Buettner
> So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on campus.
> It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
> This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
> getting involved, i.e. drinking.
Not sitting at home by yourself! PL@NQUE!!1!
--
~
~
~
"Daniel Buettner" line 4 of 4 --100%--
Jeremy Impson
> BlakXXJack <blakx...@aol.com> wrote:
> > So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here on campus.
> > It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on Tuesday.
> > This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe without
> > getting involved, i.e. drinking.
Not sitting at home by yourself *AND* and drinking! BLLONQE!
> Not sitting at home by yourself! PL@NQUE!!1!
Forgetting the "and drinking" part! PLORKNIEN!!
--Jeremy
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jeremy Impson
http://nwc.syr.edu/~jdimpson
Tamara
"Jeremy Impson" <jdim...@tasslehoff.nwc.syr.edu> wrote in message
news:Pine.GSO.4.10.101091...@tasslehoff.nwc.syr.edu...
> On 18 Sep 2001, Daniel Buettner wrote:
>
> > BlakXXJack <blakx...@aol.com> wrote:
> > > So, I hear there's going to be a party at one of the dorms here
on campus.
> > > It's the first week I've been here at college, and classes start on
Tuesday.
> > > This is the first big college party of the year. I decide to observe
without
> > > getting involved, i.e. drinking.
>
> Not sitting at home by yourself *AND* and drinking! BLLONQE!
>
> > Not sitting at home by yourself! PL@NQUE!!1!
>
> Forgetting the "and drinking" part! PLORKNIEN!!
IHNJH, I just keep WPing the subject line as "College: Phukking and
Learning."
~T
Beable van Polasm
>
> "Jeremy Impson" <jdim...@tasslehoff.nwc.syr.edu> wrote in message
> news:Pine.GSO.4.10.101091...@tasslehoff.nwc.syr.edu...
> >
>
> IHNJH, I just keep WPing the subject line as "College: Phukking and
> Learning."
Should be "College: Phukking and DRINKING!!1!" PL00NK!
cheers
Beable van Polasm
--
The US, a third-world cryptofeudal region, will move to a
wrasslin-based electoricial system -- Peter Willard
IQC 78189333
Kevin S. Wilson
Is "bowel control" one of those computer games you guys are always
talking about?
Kevin S. Wilson
Tech Writer
Instructional Technology Center--Boise State University
But only a kook <drw...@socal.rr.com> would think I speak for my employer.
Rose Marie Holt
> From: res...@micron.net (Kevin S. Wilson)
> Organization: Instructional Technology Center--Boise State University
> Reply-To: res...@micron.net
> Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology
> Date: Fri, 21 Sep 2001 19:06:04 GMT
> Subject: Re: College: Puking and Learning
>
> On Sun, 16 Sep 2001 15:04:33 GMT, Matt McIrvin
> <mmci...@world.std.com> wrote:
>
>> In article <20010916030146...@mb-cg.aol.com>,
>> blakx...@aol.com (BlakXXJack) wrote:
>>
>>> I will never see that cup again. I don't want to see that cup again.
>>> It is the only item I own that has ever been caked in someone else's
>>> vomit, and I thus feel it should be discarded. Anyway, one of his
>>> friends comes into the room, looking for him. The friend needs a
>>> partner for ping-pong. I explain that there is a lot of vomit on his
>>> bed, and he helps me get the sheets off the bed before the stuff
>>> sinks into the mattress. This is the point at which I have to
>>> involve the resident assistant.
>>
>> Man, am I glad I'm out of college.
>>
>> Worst I ever saw personally was a guy who, against the advice of
>> everybody, persisted in mixing alcohol and Xanax. Once he lost bowel
>> control.
>
> Is "bowel control" one of those computer games you guys are always
> talking about?
>
Yes, and you are holding your joystick IYKWIM HAWHAWHAWHAWHAWpeanus
James Kibo Parry
>
> BlakXXJack (blakx...@aol.com) wrote:
> >
> > I will never see that cup again. I don't want to see that cup again.
> > It is the only item I own that has ever been caked in someone else's
> > vomit, and I thus feel it should be discarded. Anyway, one of his
> > friends comes into the room, looking for him. The friend needs a
> > partner for ping-pong. I explain that there is a lot of vomit on his
> > bed, and he helps me get the sheets off the bed before the stuff
> > sinks into the mattress. This is the point at which I have to
> > involve the resident assistant.
>
> Man, am I glad I'm out of college.
>
> Worst I ever saw personally was a guy who, against the advice of
> everybody, persisted in mixing alcohol and Xanax. Once he lost bowel
> control.
Well, Matt, at least you started making normal friends once that incident
caused you to throw out your "Alf" bedspread.
-- K.
These days, instead of throwing
out barfed-on stuff, you can just
sell it on eBay, at least until eBay
invents Brainostenchic transmission.