Khadija vs. Aisha: Favorite One?
Ali 209198
It is well-known among Muslims that the best wife of the Prophet (PBUH&HF) was
Khadija (RA). She was the first woman who embraced Islam and spent all her
wealth for the cause of Allah and the Prophet never married another woman as
long as Khadija was alive.
The Messenger of Allah gave the name of the best women of the world in
chronological order and one should not be surprised that the name of Aisha is
missing:
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH&HF) said: "The most excellent of the women of all
worlds whom Allah chose over all women are: Asiya the wife of Pharaoh, Mary the
daughter of Imran, Khadija the daughter of Khuwaylid, and Fatimah the daughter
of Muhammad."
Sunni references:
Sahih al-Tirmidhi, v5, p702
al-Mustadrak, by al-Hakim, v3, p157, who said this tradition is authentic based
on the criteria of two Shaikhs (al-Bukhari and Muslim)
Musnad Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, v3, p135
Fadha'il al-Sahaba, by Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, v2, p755, Tradition #1325
Hilyatul Awliyaa, by Abu Nu'aym, v2, p344
Majma' al-Zawa'id, by al-Haythami, v9, p223
al-Isti'ab, by Ibn Abd al-Barr, v4, p377
al-Awsat by al-Tabarani, as well as Ibn Habban, etc.
Furthermore, Ibn Abbas (RA) narrated:
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH&HF) said: Four women are the mistress of the
worlds: Mary, Asiya (the wife of Pharaoh), Khadija, and Fatimah. And the most
excellent one among them in the world is Fatimah."
Sunni references: Ibn Asakir, as quoted in Tafsir al-Durr al-Manthoor
Moreover, after the demise of Khadija (RA) when the Prophet (PBUH&HF) married
Aisha and others, he explicitly preferred some of them over Aisha and said they
are better than Aisha (see Sahih al-Tirmidhi; al-Isti'ab by Ibn Abd al-Barr;
and al-Isabah, by Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani, in the biography of Safiyya).
Also the verse: "Perhaps if he divorces you, his Lord will give him wives who
are better than you, who submit and believe (Quran 66:5)" clearly indicates
that there were believing women among the Muslims who were much better than
Aisha.
Envy so controlled her heart and her mind that she conducted herself in the
presence of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH&HF) without respect or manners. On one
occasion, Aisha said to the Prophet (PBUH&HF), when he mentioned Khadija in her
presence:
Sahih Bukhari Hadith: 5.168.b
... Narrated Aisha: Once Hala Bint Khuwailid, Khadija's sister, asked the
permission of the Prophet to enter. On that, the Prophet remembered the way
Khadija used to ask permission, and that made him sad. He said, "O Allah!
Hala!" So I became jealous and said, "What makes you remember an old woman
amongst the old women of Quraish an old woman (with a teethless mouth) of red
gums who died long ago, and in whose place Allah has given you somebody better
than her?"
The Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF) became very angry at this until his hair stood.
(also reported in Muslim). Moreover, al-Bukhari narrated that Aisha confessed:
Sahih Bukhari Hadith: 5.166
Narrated Aisha:
I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of
Khadija though I did not see her, but the Prophet used to mention her very
often, and whenever he slaughtered a sheep, he would cut its parts and send
them to the women friends of Khadija. When I sometimes said to him, "(You treat
Khadija in such a way) as if there is no woman on earth except Khadija," he
would say, "Khadija was such-and-such, and from her I had children."
Khadija was the foremost believing woman, to whom Gabriel gave Greetings, and
was given the glad tidings of Paradise:
Sahih Bukhari Hadith: 9.588
Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet said that Gabriel said, "Here is Khadija coming to you with a dish
of food or a tumbler containing something to drink. Convey to her a greeting
from her Lord (Allah) and give her the glad tidings that she will have a palace
in Paradise built of Qasab wherein there will be neither any noise nor any
fatigue (trouble)."
Similar traditions was reported by the authority of Isma'il and Aisha (See
Sahih al-Bukhari, Traditions: 3.19, 5.164, 5.165, 5.167, 5.168, 7.156, 8.33,
and 9.576).
When Aisha was jealous, she would exceed her bounds and would do strange things
like breaking dishes or tearing clothes. On another occasion when the Prophet
was in the house of Aisha, one of the mothers of the believers (namely Safiyya)
sent to the Prophet a dish that he really loved. She destroyed the dish,
together with the food in it. Let us see how Aisha herself described this
episode:
Aisha said: "Safiyya, the wife of the Prophet (PBUH&HF), sent a dish she had
made for him when he was with me. When I saw the maidservant, I trembled with
rage and fury, and I took the bowl and hurled it away. The Prophet of Allah
(PBUH&HF) then looked at me; I saw the anger in his face and I said to him: 'I
seek refuge from Allah's Apostle cursing me today.' The Prophet said: 'Undo
it'. I said: 'What is its compensation, O Prophet of Allah?' He said: 'The food
like her food, and a bowl like her bowl.'"
Sunni references:
Musnad, by Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, v6, p227
Sahih al-Nisa'i, v2, p148
al-Bukhari confirms this episode as well:
Sahih al-Bukhari Hadith: 7.152 (The Chapter of Envy)
Narrated Anas:
While the Prophet was in the house of one of his wives, one of the mothers of
the believers sent a meal in a dish. The wife at whose house the Prophet was,
struck the hand of the servant, causing the dish to fall and break. The Prophet
gathered the broken pieces of the dish and then started collecting on them the
food which had been in the dish and said, "Your mother (my wife) felt jealous."
Then he detained the servant till a (sound) dish was brought from the wife at
whose house he was. He gave the sound dish to the wife whose dish had been
broken and kept the broken one at the house where it had been broken.
And on another occasion, speaking of herself:
Aisha said: "I said to the Prophet (PBUH&HF) 'Enough for you about Safiyya is
such and such.' The Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF) said to me: 'You have uttered
words which, if they were mixed with the waters of the sea, would color it.'"
Sunni reference: Sahih al-Tirmidhi, and al-Zamakhshari has related it from him
on, p73
By this Aisha was trying to disclose Safiyya's faults. Glory be to Allah! How
far was this mother of the believers away from the ethics and basic rights
which Islam has enjoined concerning forbidding of backbiting and slander? No
doubt her speech: "Enough for you about Safiyya is such and such" and the
response of the Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF) "You have uttered words which, if
they were mixed with the waters of the sea, would color it" shows what Aisha
had said regarding Safiyya was a grave thing and of immense concern. The
narrators of the Hadith found it repulsive, and since they respected her, they
changed the words to "so and so" as is their normal practice in such scandals.
And here is Aisha, the mother of the believers, narrating, once again, of her
envy of Mariya (another mother of the believers). Aisha said:
"I have never been as jealous of any woman as I have been of Mariya. That was
because she had beautiful ringlets. She used to stay in the house of Haritha
Ibn al-Numan. We frightened her and I became concerned. The Prophet of Allah
(PBUH&HF) sent her to a higher place and he would visit her there. That was
very hard upon us, and then Allah blessed him with a boy through her and we
shunned him".
Sunni references:
al-Tabaqat, by Ibn Sa'd, v8, p212
al-Ansab al-Ashraf, by al-Baladhuri, v1, p339
Aisha's jealousy went beyond the person of Mariya, and was directed even
against Ibrahim, the innocent, newly born suckling baby:
Aisha said: "When Ibrahim was born, the Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF) brought him
to me and said: 'Look how much he resembles me.' I said: 'I do not see any
resemblance.' The Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF) said: 'Don't you see how robust
and fair he is?"' Aisha said: "I said: 'Whoever is fed with the milk of sheep
becomes fair and robust.'"
Sunni references:
al-Tabaqat, by Ibn Sa'd, v1, p37
also in al-Ansab al-Ashraf, by al-Baladhuri
Aisha was very partial and yielded to emotions and selfish motives. When some
people maliciously accused Mariya (the wife of the Prophet), she was Aisha who
supported the accusers and tried to confirm the false blame. But Allah, the
Mighty and Glorious, absolved her from blame and saved her from injustice,
through the Commander of Believers, Imam Ali (AS). (For details refer to the
account of Lady Mariya, may Allah be gracious to her, in al-Mustadrak, by
al-Hakim, v4, p30, or Talkhis of al-Mustadrak, by al-Dhahabi).
When she was overcome by suspicion and devilish insinuation, her jealousy
crossed all boundaries and was beyond the expression of words, leading her to
suspect the Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF). Quite often, she used to pretend to be
asleep when the Prophet stayed the night at her house, but, in fact, she would
closely observe her husband, spying upon him in the darkness, following behind
where he went. Here is a report, in her own words, which was narrated by Muslim
in his Sahih, and Ahmad Ibn Hanbal in his Musnad and other Sunni scholars:
Aisha said: When it was my turn for Allah's Messenger to spend the night with
me, he turned his side, put on his mantle, and took off his shoes and placed
them near his feet and spread the corner of his shawl on his bed and then lay
down till he thought that I had gone to sleep. He then took hold of his mantle
and put on the shoes slowly, and opened the door and went out and then closed
the door lightly. I covered my head, put on my veil, and tightened my waist
wrapper, and then went out following his steps till he reached (the cemetery
of) al-Baqi. He stood there for a long time and then he lifted his hand three
times and then returned, and I also returned. He hastened his steps and I also
hastened my steps. He ran and I also ran. He came (to the home) and I also came
(to the home). I, however, preceded him and entered and lay down on the bed. He
entered and said: Why is it, O Aisha, that you are out of breath? I said: There
is nothing. He said: Tell me or the Subtle and the Aware will inform me. I told
him the story. He said: Was it the darkness (of your shadow) that I saw in
front of me? I said: Yes. He struck me on the chest which caused me pain and
the said: Did you think Allah and His Apostle would deal unjustly with you?
Sunni references:
Sahih Muslim, English version, chapter CCCLII (titled: What is to be said while
visiting the graveyard), v2, pp 461-462, Tradition #2127
Sahih Muslim, Arabic version, 1980 Edition Pub. in Saudi Arabia, v2, pp
669-670, Tradition #103
Musnad, by Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, v6, p147
On another occasion, she said:
"I lost track of the Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF), and I suspected that he had
gone to another of his wives. I went looking for him and I found him in
prostration, saying. "O My Lord! Forgive me"
Sunni reference: Musnad, by Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, v6, p147
On another occasion:
Aisha said: "One night, when he was with me, the Messenger of Allah (PBUH&HF)
went out". She said: "I became jealous. When he came and saw what I had done,
he said: 'What is the matter, O Aisha? Are you jealous?' I replied: 'And why
should not those like me be jealous of those like you?' The Prophet of Allah
(PBUH&HF) then said: 'Has your devil taken possession of you?'".
Sunni reference: Musnad, by Ahmad Ibn Hanbal, v6, p115
No doubt Aisha was quite often overcome or confused by her devil, for he found
a way to her heart through jealousy. It has been narrated that the Prophet
(PBUH&HF) said: "Jealousy for a man is faith and for a woman disbelief",
meaning that a man may get jealous concerning his wife, for his wife is not
religiously allowed to have sexual relation with another man. The woman,
however, does not have the right to be jealous of her husband, because Allah,
Glory be to Him, has allowed him to marry more than one wife. An upright and
believing woman who submits to the rulings of Allah, accepts her co-wife
wholeheartedly, especially if her husband is just, upright, and God-fearing.
How about the leader of humanity, the symbol of perfection and justice, and the
most noble character, the Messenger of Allah?
Once the Prophet asked Aisha to collect certain information about a particular
woman, namely, Sharraf, the sister of Dihya al-Kalbi. The information that she
conveyed to him was not the information she had gathered, but wrong information
prompted by selfish motives. When the Prophet (PBUH&HF) informed her of the
truth of what she had observed, Aisha replied: "O Prophet of Allah! No secret
is unknown to you. Who is able to hide anything from you?"
Sunni references:
Kanz al-Ummal, by al-Muttaqi al-Hindi, v6, p294
al-Tabaqat, by Ibn Sa'd, v8, p115
She said once she addressed to the Messenger of Allah: "I smell Maghafir (a
kind of flower having a very bad odor) from you." She said this in order to
prevent him from visiting the house of Umm al-Mu'minin Zainab (RA) and eating
honey there. This is the claim of Aisha. No other people mentioned this. As I
will point out shortly, the story said by Umar regarding the revelation of
divorce verses, is much different than the context of what Aisha said.
Sahih Bukhari Hadith: 6.434
Narrated Aisha:
Allah's Apostle used to drink honey in the house of Zainab, the daughter of
Jahsh, and would stay there with her. So Hafsa and I agreed secretly that, if
he come to either of us, she would say to him "It seems you have eaten Maghafir
(a kind of bad-smelling resin), for I smell in you the smell of Maghafir."
Sahih al-Bukhari Hadith 7.192
Narrated 'Ubaid bin Umar:
I heard Aisha saying, "The Prophet used to stay for a long while with Zainab
Bint Jahsh and drink honey at her house. So Hafsa and I decided that if the
Prophet came to anyone of us, she should say him, "I detect the smell of
Maghafir (a nasty smelling gum) in you. Have you eaten Maghafir?'... So there
was revealed: 'O Prophet ! Why do you ban (for you) that which Allah has made
lawful for you . . . If you two (wives of Prophet) turn in repentance to
Allah,' (66:1-4) addressing Aisha and Hafsa. 'When the Prophet disclosed a
matter in confidence to some of his wives.'(66:3)
Tradition 8.682 of Sahih al-Bukhari is also similar to above and is narrated by
Aisha himself. No other person narrated the story of honey in connection with
the divorce verses. Please also see the previous article where we mentioned
Sahih al-Bukhari, Tradition 7.119. In that tradition which is narrated by Umar,
the Prophet (PBUH&HF) did not enter to the house of Aisha and Hafsa for one
full month as a punishment for their aggressive actions. Considering the
compassionate and the gentle personality of the Prophet (PBUH&HF), such severe
punishment and the threat to divorce just for their saying to the Prophet "You
smell Maghafir" (as Aisha claimed) does not seem reasonable. Quran confirms
that the charges against Hafsa and Aisha was revealing a secret news:
When the Prophet disclosed a matter in confidence to one of his wives (i.e.,
Hafsa) and she then divulged it (i.e., to Aisha) and Allah made it known to
him, he made known (to her) part thereof and passed over part. Then when he
(i.e., the Prophet) told her thereof, she said: "Who told you this?" He said
"He who knows and is well-aware (of all things) told me." (Quran 66.3)
It seems that the report of Umar is more accurate. Umar said: "The Prophet kept
away from his wives for twenty-nine days because of the story which Hafsa had
disclosed to Aisha." (See Sahih al-Bukhari 7.119 and 6.435). This is much
different than the story made by Aisha about honey.
After one month that the Prophet deserted his wives, and when the words of
Allah: "You may defer any one of them you wish and take to your self any you
wish and there is no sin for you to take back any of them you have
(temporarily) set aside (33:51)" were revealed, Aisha said to the Prophet:
"It seems to me that your Lord hastens to satisfy your desire!"
Sunni references:
Sahih Muslim, English version, Chapter DLXXII (titled: Permissibility of
bestowing the turn on one's fellow wife), v2, pp 748-749, Traditions #3453-3454
Sahih Muslim, Arabic version, 1980 Edition Pub. in Saudi Arabia, v2, pp
1085-1086, Traditions #49-50
Her evil conduct in the presence of the Prophet of Allah (PBUH&HF) reached a
point that while he was praying, she would spread her feet towards his
direction of prostration. When he prostrated and pinched them, she retracted
them. When he stood up for the rest of the prayer, she would spread her feet
out again:
Sahih Bukhari Hadith: 1.492 & 1.379
Narrated Aisha:
"I used to sleep in front of Allah's Apostle with my legs opposite his Qibla
(facing him); and whenever he prostrated, he pushed my feet and I withdrew them
and whenever he stood, I stretched them."
One day, in the presence of her father, she started a quarrel with the Prophet
and told him: "Be just." Her father punished her for the impudence by giving a
powerful a slap on her face so that she bled profusely and the blood ran onto
her clothes.
Sunni references:
Kanz al-Ummal, by al-Muttaqi al-Hindi, v7, p116, Tradition #1020
Ihyaa al-Ulum, by al-Ghazzali, Chapter 3, Bab al-Nikah, v2, p35
Mukashifat al-Qulub, by al-Ghazzali, Chapter 94, p238
If Aisha got angry at the Prophet - which she did quite often - she would avoid
uttering the name of the Prophet (PBUH&HF). She would not mention the name of
Muhammad, but rather used to say: "By the Lord of Abraham" (Sahih al-Bukhari,
Arabic-English version, Tradition #7.155 and #8.101, The Chapter of Jealousy
and Wiles of a woman).
Once she angrily said to the Messenger of Allah (PBUH&HF):
"It is you who pretend to be a prophet from Allah."
Sunni references:
- Ihyaa al-Ulum, by al-Ghazzali, Chapter 3, v2, p29, The Book on the Etiquettes
of Marriage
- Mukashifat al-Qulub, by al-Ghazzali, Chapter 94
Subhana Allah!!! This is the Messenger of Allah, and submitting to his order is
obligatory for every believing men and women. Disputing him is a sign of great
impurity and the one who does that can not be regarded as pure and righteous
since s/he has committed a grave sin, let alone casting doubt on the
prophethood of Muhammad (PBUH&HF).
"The greatest joy in Islam is to kill and be killed for the sake of Allah
(SWT)"