Jokes for Drunks and ex-drunks

[Old Jinglebollocks]

A huge big fat woman, wearing a sleeveless dress, walks into a bar.
She raises her right arm, as thick as a wrestler's thigh, revealing a
huge, hairy armpit, as she points to all the men at the bar and
demands:
"Which of you is man enough to buy this lady a drink?"

The bar goes deathly silent as the drinkers try to ignore her. But
down at the end of the bar, a retired old drunken sailor slams his
hand down on the bar and bellows,
"Give the ballerina a drink!"
The bartender pours the drink and the woman disposes of it in one
gulp.

She turns to the patrons and again points around at all of them,
revealing the same hairy armpit, and demands:
"Which of you is man enough to buy this lady a drink?"

Once again the same old seaman slapped his money down on the bar and
said,
"Give the ballerina another drink!"

The bartender approached the old drunk and said,
"Look, mister, it's not my business if you want to buy the lady a
drink, but why do you keep calling her a ballerina?"

The drunk replied,
"Any woman who can lift her leg that high, and with no panties on,
has got to be a ballerina."