What is a -dry drunk-?
Keith Jenkins
I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
Yesterday I was so depressed that my head felt full of -sludge- and one
thought could hardly follow another. I wondered if this is what is
sometimes meant by the phrase.
(Feeling somewhat better today btw)
--
Keith
Ke...@Keithj.demon.co.uk
Ms Nomer
When I am in a Dry Drunk, it is when I have behaviors and priorities etc.,
just like while I was a practicing alcoholic. It doesn't usually mean
slurring speech, or falling, it is more crafty in nature. If you ever
witness two sober drunks in a fist fight outside ( or inside for that
matter) or someone in a ng being intolerant of others, hateful, or
resentful, it would be a safe assumption to view that behavior as a 'dry
drunk'. It is a very common state however, that is why it is called
Alcoholism. We (emphasize we) Alcoholics can be prickly people until we
regain focus and get out of the dry drunkenness.
Ms Nomer n A'zona
Keith Jenkins <kei...@keithj.demon.co.uk> wrote in article
<vVVjeAAq...@keithj.demon.co.uk>...
C Toby
Keith Jenkins wrote:
>
> I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
> refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
> curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
> actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
>
> Yesterday I was so depressed that my head felt full of -sludge- and one
> thought could hardly follow another. I wondered if this is what is
> sometimes meant by the phrase.
>
> (Feeling somewhat better today btw)
> --
> Keith
Don't like the expression; never have, so I don't use it. Nine times out
of ten, when I wake up feeling skanky, it's because I'm sick, or smoked
too much the night before, or didn't sleep well. When I was drinking none
of these states bothered me, because I had the 'cure.' Now that I'm
sober, I will sometimes find myself feeling depressed for no good
reason.My first thought is never "Wow, I might be coming down with a
cold," (which is most often the case, thankfully), but rather to begin
taking my emotional temperature every few minutes and try to figure out
'why' I am depressed. I am a fortunate person. Whenever I experience
*real* depression,(meaning not as a precursor to a physical illness),
there is always some event related to it. But as I said, I'm fortunate.
For those who are 'clinically depressed,' no such event is necessary to
trigger an episode of depression.
As for your intial question, 'What is a dry drunk?' I always answer,
'Better than a wet one!' <G>
I prefer to call people who are still locked into old behaviors and
attitudes The Undrunk...you know, like The Undead? But I suppose that's
just semantics....hehehehe
AA love and prayers,
Carla :)
Train
In article <321B10...@bgnet.bgsu.edu>, ca...@bgnet.bgsu.edu
says...
>
>Keith Jenkins wrote:
>>
>> I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>> I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
>> refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
>> curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
>> actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
>>
(No, really. It was Mick Taylor on his come-back and I wanted to hear the
last living ex-Stone.) I was good, I stood up by the band and dug the music.
The next morning I woke up with a hangover, just as bad as usual, but without
dry heaves. A guy at the club said it was a "psychological" hangover. I had
never heard of such a thing. The moral was: If you tend to get stiff in the joints,
stay out of them.
P.S. The music wasn't very good either -- Mick was all strung out on I don't
know what and the group was really uncohesive.
Keep smiling,
Gary
alex
Keith Jenkins wrote:
>
> I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
> I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
> refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
> curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
> actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
>
> thought could hardly follow another. I wondered if this is what is
> sometimes meant by the phrase.
>
> (Feeling somewhat better today btw)
> --
> Keith
Hi Kieth.
For quite some time after i stopped dtinking and before i got active
i was what i and others consider a "dry drunk." Although not a bit of
mind/mood altering substance was in my body, i behaved (except) for the
using) just as i had before i stopped drinking. I stopped drinking
relatively easily, but it was very hard for me to stop behaving as an
alcoholic. The fear, lying, chaeating, stealing, obsessiveness, and
compulsiveness continued long after my last drunk.
Then, all of a sudden, i got real active. I carved out time for me
to go to meetings, joined a group, got a sponser, and made AA friends.
I'm working the steps over with my sponser (I thought i had been through
#3, how wrong i was!)
I consider my father a dry drunk. Often i see his behavior similar
to mine when i was using, although he seldom drinks. i don't do this to
take his inventory or anything, it justs helps me say that he's sick,
not evil...just like me...and then i prey for him.
Hope this helps...
alex
------------------------------------------------------
"The horses and the hounds, and gentlemen in red.
With thunder under hoof, and fire overhead.
The swift and sure can ride, and bend the wild flower,
the hunted, terrified must find a higher power."
-Parallax View
Bruce Johns
ga...@enter.net (Train) wrote:
>In article <321B10...@bgnet.bgsu.edu>, ca...@bgnet.bgsu.edu
>says...
>>
>>Keith Jenkins wrote:
>>>
>>> I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>>> I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
>>> refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
>>> curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
>>> actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
>>>
>After I had been dry for about six months I went to a bar to hear the music.
>(No, really. It was Mick Taylor on his come-back and I wanted to hear the
>last living ex-Stone.) I was good, I stood up by the band and dug the music.
>The next morning I woke up with a hangover, just as bad as usual, but without
>dry heaves. A guy at the club said it was a "psychological" hangover. I had
>never heard of such a thing. The moral was: If you tend to get stiff in the joints,
>stay out of them.
>P.S. The music wasn't very good either -- Mick was all strung out on I don't
>know what and the group was really uncohesive.
>Keep smiling,
>Gary
Hi, I'm Bruce and I'm an alcoholic. It has been explained to me that
a "dry drunk" has nothing to do with acting drunk. It simply
describes a person that is "dry", still full of the same anger, lust,
resentments, etc, etc, as has always been our problem,.....just not
drinking. What a miserable existance....you might as well drink!
Well there is one more option......Do the Deal and Work the Damn
Program!!!!! Thanks.
<b...@e-tex.com>
Janicecool
dry drunk is when you need a drink and you lash out instead of reaching
for the steps or a meeting or a sponsor or a program friend
janice
Ted H.
In article <vVVjeAAq...@keithj.demon.co.uk>,
Keith J <kei...@keithj.demon.co.uk> writes:
>
>I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
>refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
>curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
>actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
>
Hi Keith and welcome! My understanding is that a dry drunk
centers around attitudes. When I am trying hard to manage and
control things around me (usually people) and will not admit it
even though others point it out to me, I consider (later) myself
to be in a dry drunk. Typical symptoms are given in the Big
Book--restless, irritable, and bored. Usually this attitude comes
about as a result of my refusal to accept things as they are. On
reflection I typically find I've been shirking some (or all) of the
actions suggested in the Twelve Steps. When I get back to action,
my symptoms and attitude improve.
For me, the actions that work start with an inventory--what is it
that's bugging me, why, and what can I do about it? Another thing
that often helps is reading A.A. literature--especially the Big Book.
If after taking these actions I still am irritable, I try some
Eleventh Step. If that doesn't improve my attitude, Twelfth Step
work always does. Usually this is either going to a meeting, calling
alcoholics on my phone list to ask how they are, or working on service
committee work. Of course I don't always take these corrective actions
until after I've stewed in things for awhile! Some day maybe I'll
learn, but probably not. :)
Regarding the sludgy feeling you talked about, I don't think that
is a dry drunk, but I sure know the feeling! It may be partly due
to the physical effects of drying out and should pass with time.
Occasionally I still get that same sort of feeling after I have been
excessive--with food, activity, or emotion.
Hope this helps answer some of your questions. Again, welcome!
It's nice to have you here. :)
Ted H. <the...@netins.net> Omaha, NE, USA
RobinH
>
>I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>I have been attending meetings
Hi Keith and thanks for your post.
I first got "dry" almost exactly seven years ago. I stayed that way
for nearly two years, before a massive relapse brought me into AA
*properly*. During that dry period, I dabbled in low-alcohol beer and
wine, and solved my drinking problem "intellectually".
I had looked at the Twelve Steps and decided that they contained no
intellectual challenge whatsoever for a man of my outstanding mental
capabilities. Besides which, they were not written by a Brit and were
a typical example of American "painting by numbers".
I certainly had no intention of reading any of the badly-written
evangelical claptrap that you AA groupies described as "literature".
If you wanted to hide money from me, put it in the Big Book.
I was a desperately frightened, angry, bitterly resentful,
self-pitying, arrogant, rictus-grinning, Recovered Alcoholic, for
Crissake, and you had better admire what I was doing for you! You told
me to give up drinking for you and I HAD! But after all my
magnificent, altruistic sacrifice, you bastards didn't change at all!
You and the rest of the world carried right on drinking, and getting
away with it, and I couldn't. Yet after this massive and final change
in my way of life that YOU had imposed on me, I still felt like a shit
and you still treated me like one.
And, by God, there was no way that I was going to let you see how I
really felt. MY feelings were MY business, to be ruthlessly supressed,
even if that meant that my anger was going burst out uncontrollably
sometimes. I needed your sympathy and understanding, didn't I? And
after all you OWED me. It was your and the rest of the world's fault
that I got into the mess I was in before I Recovered. Self-evident.
Obvious. Shaddap, or I might get REALLY angry!
Full of self-hatred for my lack of moral fibre. Shame and guilt for
past behaviour. And the only people prepared to listen to me were
sactimonious, self-satisfied, smiling zombies who said they once had
felt the same way I did, but they had discovered that it was all
caused by a disease, and that God would help me as He had helped them.
So AA was out. Just another bunch of self-righteous, self-deluded,
lying toerags with no possible way of understanding my problems.
Untreated alcoholism. "Living the addiction", as a lady I much admire
expressed it the other evening.
So lets see how you are tackling life:
>
>Yesterday I was so depressed that my head felt full of -sludge- and one
>thought could hardly follow another. I wondered if this is what is
>sometimes meant by the phrase.
>
>(Feeling somewhat better today btw)
>--
>Keith
You are doing what a dry drunk never could: sharing your feelings
honestly with fellow alcoholics. Terrific. Nuff said.
With a lot of love,
RobinH
=======================================
... And meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same ...
(Rudyard Kipling, "If")
John Hurley
alex <ca...@bgnet.bgsu.edu> wrote:
>Keith Jenkins wrote:
>>
>> I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>> I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
>> refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
>> curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
>> actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
>>
>> Yesterday I was so depressed that my head felt full of -sludge- and one
>> thought could hardly follow another. I wondered if this is what is
>> sometimes meant by the phrase.
>>
>> (Feeling somewhat better today btw)
>> --
>> Keith
Hi Kieth.
my last drunk was Nov 1981. I finally came in Aug of 93 to AA. While
not ever being drunk during that time I was not sober either. I would
have frequent raging tantrums. (not that I don't now, but the
operative word is frequent). And as other people have stated there
are the isms...lying, egoism, paranoia.
One of the things I have learned is the 2 rules of life:
Don't sweat the small stuff.
It's all small stuff.
See you at the coffepot
jh
______________________________________________
Stained glass enhances the beauty of any home
Visit "http://www.bv.net/~hurley for info
on our August special
Keith Jenkins
In article <321c67ae...@news.demon.co.uk>, RobinH
<rob...@dunster.demon.co.uk> writes
>On Tue, 20 Aug 1996 23:25:46 +0100, Keith Jenkins
>
>>
>>I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>>I have been attending meetings
>
>
>
>
>You are doing what a dry drunk never could: sharing your feelings
>honestly with fellow alcoholics. Terrific. Nuff said.
>
>With a lot of love,
>
>RobinH
>
Thank you for your wonderful and helpful posting. Made my day!
--
Keith
Ke...@Keithj.demon.co.uk
Robbo
(Everything but the title snipped for brevity, *not* criticism) :-)
I differentiate between 'dry' and 'sober'. To me a 'dry person' is one
who has stopped drinking but nothing whatsoever about how they react
to life - for an alcoholic this is a 'dry drunk'. The alcoholic who is
'sober' is one following a recovery programme that helps them change
themselves and the way they react to life's stimuli.
I use the twelve step programme of AA on a 24-hour a day basis. I
attempt to apply the principles in all my affairs, sometimes with more
success than others. I am able to respond to what life presents me
with in a manner that is acceptable to me and the society in which I
live. This was not true when I drank.
The bottom line is a 'dry drunk' is a non-drinking alcoholic with all
the 'isms' of the disease.
Happy day.
{{{ AA hugs all round }}}
---
Robbo
------
rob...@globalnet.co.uk
htp://village.vossnet.co.uk/d/dforever
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Education kills by degrees.
WIGGET26
A dry -drunk is a state where somebody acually wants to drink but knows
they can't. They fight with their inner self over this obssession.
Grudges, resentments , and fear dominate their life. This is just my
opinion not necessarily fact.
Gimpguy
In article <vVVjeAAq...@keithj.demon.co.uk>, Keith Jenkins
<kei...@keithj.demon.co.uk> writes:
>
>
>I have heard the expression -dry drunk- a few times in the short period
>I have been attending meetings (a couple of weeks now). It appears to
>refer to people acting in a drunk manner but without drinking. I am
>curious as to what people think is meant by the phrase and if it is
>actually possible -physiologically- to experience such a state.
Dry Drunk implies a state of mind and behavior which is poisonous to the
alcoholic's well being.
Signs or symptoms of the Dry Drunk.
1. Grandoise behavior. Lack of insight, exaggerates own importance at the
expense of others. Overestimation of abilities, intelligence and
judgement. Unaware of the need and feelings of others.
2. Rigidly judgemental: Usually sees things in terms of goodness and
badness.
3. Tense impatience: With others or about life. Wanting immediate release
from any stress or strain: if not instant satisfaction, the person becomes
indigant or depressed.
4. Childish behavior: Easily bored, distracted or disorganized. Feelings
can change from moment to moment. Cannot enjoy being with others,
conversation, movies, TV, etc. Often "picks up their ball" and runs home.
5. Unrealistic behavior: Denial of the truth about oneself. Criticism by
others covered up by explainations or excuses. Finds fault with others,
their attitudes and behaviors, looks outward, not inward. Sees in others
what he cannot accept in himself. Lack of insight. Reasons may have some
truth in them but ignores the fact that he needs help. Examples: Cussing
someone will get them to do what we want. Laying on a horn in a traffic
jam will change the situations.
6. Over-reaction: " Know all the answers." Has a lot of resentments
towards other people or things. Anger; "blows up" over nothing. Often cops
out by saying or implying, "after all, I'm an alcoholic".
>
>Yesterday I was so depressed that my head felt full of -sludge- and one
>thought could hardly follow another. I wondered if this is what is
>sometimes meant by the phrase.
Not likely. You've already described you problem from yesterday. You were
depressed. It IS difficult to put one thought in front of another while
being depressed.
The 12 steps are good tools in fighting depression, unless the depression
has physical causes. Only your doctor will know for sure.
I was on a dry drunk the day I left treatment. The best benefit of my
treatment center was the 6 month head start it provided for AA. My only
text book was the BB. And the only home work my counselor suggested, was
to "do" the 1st 5 steps. Now, 28 days isn't enough time for me to do these
steps, but, it was good practice for the real world. BTW my dry drunk
turned wet in a few weeks. I was simply too sick to "get over" a dry drunk
at that time. Hell, I couldn't even recognize my dry drunk while I was
reading about it.
That was over 13 years ago. I can recognize an impending dry drunk and
take the necessary actions to make sure the dry drunk stays dry til its
gone.
Mickey
*No matter where I go, there I am.*