Stag Films -- The History
Steven K. Robison
from the Gutenberg press to the Internet, but it was the Lumiere brothers'
first commercial cinema display in 1895 in Paris that inspired creative smut
on an international scale. The first "blue movies" were staid -- pictures
of a couple embracing as in Kiss in the Tunnel (1899) -- or static, women
simply staring at the camera in various states of undress. But soon some
anonymous geniuses recognized the narrative potential of the art form. From
1907, directors in France, Germany, and the United States began making
one-reel films that included live sex acts with prostitutes, to be shown at
bachelor parties. This struck a popular chord particularly in cutting-edge
New York. The oldest surviving American stag movie is A Free Ride (1915),
also known as A Grass Sandwich, which was shot in New Jersey and played for
years in X-rated Manhattan cinemas.
The plot line, not surprisingly, is simple. A wealthy man-about-town gives
a girl a lift in his flashy convertible but stops ten miles from her
destination; he then offers to drive her the rest of the way in exchange for
sex. She indignantly refuses and walks home. In the next scene, the
caddish driver gives her a lift again. This time, he stops twenty miles
from home, with the same offer. Again, she refuses. On the third day, he
drops her fifty miles from home. This time she relents, and they make love
on the grass.
As the girl brushes down her dress, she admits that she had been happy to
walk ten miles, or even twenty miles. "But I'll Be Damned if I Will Walk 50
Miles Just to Stop You" -- cut to her gleeful face -- "From Getting a Dose
of the CLAP."
--Tony Perrottet, Napoleon's Privates -- 2,500 Years of History Unzipped
(2008), pp. 18 - 19 (a delightful little collection of sexually-oriented
tidbits from history, some of which I had heard of, some of which, like this
one, I had not -- SKR)
--
__________
All outgoing original e-mail scanned for virus content by McAfee
VirusScan. -- SKR
SteveMR200
<9dOdnbEtXZwBx-zV...@posted.choiceonecommunications>:
>As the girl brushes down her dress, she admits that she had been happy to
>walk ten miles, or even twenty miles. "But I'll Be Damned if I Will Walk 50
>Miles Just to Stop You" -- cut to her gleeful face -- "From Getting a Dose
>of the CLAP."
>
>--Tony Perrottet, Napoleon's Privates -- 2,500 Years of History Unzipped
>(2008), pp. 18 - 19
Father Mulcahy: (William Christopher)
I received this memo today from my superior at H.Q.
Captain Benjamin "Hawkeye" Pierce: (Alan Alda)
I didn't know they had Father Superiors.
Father Mulcahy:
He is superior in name only. Some green-behind-
the-ears novice, with a bug up his cassock. And
do you know what he wants to know?
Colonel Sherman T. Potter: (Harry Morgan)
No.
Father Mulcahy:
He wants to know what I'm doing about this
company's spiraling VD rate.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter:
Well, that's a barrel of bushwa, Padre. They
can't make a priest responsible for the VD
problem.
Captain Benjamin "Hawkeye" Pierce:
Unless they believe in the theory of immaculate infection.
--Dialogue from the "Give 'Em Hell, Hawkeye"
episode of M*A*S*H; written by Dennis Koenig,
original air date: November 16, 1981
--
Steve
The Fantasy Contessa
> Father Mulcahy:
> He wants to know what I'm doing about this
> company's spiraling VD rate.
>
> Colonel Sherman T. Potter:
> Well, that's a barrel of bushwa, Padre. They
> can't make a priest responsible for the VD
> problem.
Statistically...you'll have more chance of contracting AIDS from a
Catholic priest than from a prostitute.
~ Nina Lopez-Jones, spokeswoman for the English Collective of
Prostitutes quoted in The Independent (Sept. 13, 1992)
--
//The Fantasy Contessa
AQ website: Photos, FAQ, AQers websites
http://www.altquotations.com/
_____________________________________
H.P. Huey
> SteveMR200 wrote:
>
>> Father Mulcahy:
>> He wants to know what I'm doing about this
>> company's spiraling VD rate.
>>
>> Colonel Sherman T. Potter:
>> Well, that's a barrel of bushwa, Padre. They
>> can't make a priest responsible for the VD
>> problem.
> ______________________________________
>
> Statistically...you'll have more chance of contracting AIDS from a
> Catholic priest than from a prostitute.
> ~ Nina Lopez-Jones, spokeswoman for the English Collective of
> Prostitutes quoted in The Independent (Sept. 13, 1992)
"He's sweating more than Michael Jackson at a Boy Scout meeting."
~ Triumph the Insult Comic Dog
--
HellPope Huey
Crab-flavored chewing gum just didn't catch on
"Umm. Hmm. Nope, no giant cows in this town.
But come to think of it,
there is a giant cow about 30 miles south of here."
~ Gas station guy, Carrington.
Mustard's no good without roast beef.
~ Chico Marx
SteveMR200
<O9Aek.12443$cW3....@nlpi064.nbdc.sbc.com>:
> "Umm. Hmm. Nope, no giant cows in this town.
> But come to think of it,
> there is a giant cow about 30 miles south of here."
> ~ Gas station guy, Carrington.
Glimpy: (Huntz Hall)
I milked a cow once, a very intricate affair.
You see, a cow has four faucets.
Danny: (Bobby Jordan)
What for?
Glimpy:
Well, the first faucet is for buttermilk, the
second is for bottled milk, and the third is
for evaporated milk.
Danny:
What's the fourth one for?
Glimpy:
Come to think of it, this cow had only three.
--Dialogue from the film _Spooks Run Wild_ [1941];
screenplay by Carl Foreman, Jack Henley and
Charles R. Marion
--
Steve