Famous Last Words???
N J A Thorne
source of "famous last words" quotes? Is there
such a thing as a book on the subject??
Any help will be much appreciated.
Nicky Thorne
BadSpeller!
This says it all:
--
Luke
"I don't feel so good."
Last words of Luther Burbank
Rao Akella
"Die, my dear doctor? That's the last thing I shall do."
-- Lord Palmerston (attrib.), 1865
"If this is dying, I don't think much of it."
-- Lytton Strachey (attrib.), 1932
"Either they go, or I do."
-- Oscar Wilde, of his new bedroom curtains (attrib.), 1900
"Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored."
-- George Saunders' dying words
"Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a
conventional thing to happen to him."
-- John Barrymore's dying words
"I wish I'd drunk more champagne."
-- last words of Lord John Maynard Keynes
"Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something."
-- Last words of Pancho Villa
-- Rao Akella <r...@moose.cccs.umn.edu, rao%mo...@umnacvx.bitnet>
Bertram Walsh
VAE, PVTO DEVS FIO
Alas, I think I'm becoming a god ...
-- Vespasian
Bertram Walsh Mathematics Dep't Rutgers University New Brunswick NJ 08903
Carl Christensen
quite a few last words. Here is just a sampling:
"God bless...God damn." -- James Thurber
"I die." -- Leonhard Euler
After his nurse suggested that he was feeling better...
"On the contrary!" -- Henrik Ibsen
"Qualis artifex pereo!" ("How great an artist dies here!")
-- Nero
----
Carl Christensen
Ben Scott
-----
All syllogisms have three parts.
Therefore this is not a syllogism.
-----
"It's the last thing they'll expect - a daylight charge over the minefield."
- Rimmer, _Red Dwarf_, "Meltdown"
. <<<<Infinite K>>>>
--
|Ben Scott, professional goof-off and consultant at The Raster Image, Denver|
|Internet bsc...@nyx.cs.du.edu, or call the Arvada 68K BBS at (303)424-6208.|
|"Don't tug on that - you never know what ][The Raster Image IS responsible |
|it might be attached to." Buckaroo Banzai][for everything I say! | *Amiga* |
Ben Scott
>source of "famous last words" quotes? Is there
>such a thing as a book on the subject??
Well, maybe not, but I've always had a favorite in this category:
-----
"...and always remember the last words of my grandfather,
who said "A truck!"..."
- Emo Philips
-----
"What do you do if you step on a mine, Captain?"
"Well, the usual procedure is to leap 200 feet in the air and spread
yourself over a wide area..."
- Captain Blackadder, _Blackadder Goes Forth_
Andrew Baker Glazier
>A longtime favorite of mine:
>
>-----
>
>All syllogisms have three parts.
>
>Therefore this is not a syllogism.
>
>-----
>
same thing as a vaild argument (that's "valid" not "veiled", and vice versa,
which is not true
--
"A horse! A horse! Somebody give me a horse, man, because|glazier@
I come to bury this dirtball, not to praise him. Whaddya |harvard.isr.edu
think I am? Whether it's nobler for the mind to make people suffer with all
these totally outrageous arrows arrows for a fortune, or what!" -- D.R.
Andrew Baker Glazier
>>Can anyone recommend to me a good (and accurate)
>>source of "famous last words" quotes? Is there
>>such a thing as a book on the subject??
>
>Well, maybe not, but I've always had a favorite in this category:
>
>-----
>
>"...and always remember the last words of my grandfather,
>who said "A truck!"..."
> - Emo Philips
>-----
>
>"What do you do if you step on a mine, Captain?"
>
>"Well, the usual procedure is to leap 200 feet in the air and spread
>yourself over a wide area..."
> - Captain Blackadder, _Blackadder Goes Forth_
>
>. <<<<Infinite K>>>>
>
>--
>|Ben Scott, professional goof-off and consultant at The Raster Image, Denver|
>|Internet bsc...@nyx.cs.du.edu, or call the Arvada 68K BBS at (303)424-6208.|
>|"Don't tug on that - you never know what ][The Raster Image IS responsible |
>|it might be attached to." Buckaroo Banzai][for everything I say! | *Amiga* |
David Brooks
| source of "famous last words" quotes? Is there
| such a thing as a book on the subject??
Since everybody else seems to be ignoring this request, and posting
their favorites...
George V, as reported by the Palace:
"How is the Empire?"
George V, as more reliably reported, when being offered a convalescent
trip to Bognor, a seedy seaside resort:
"Bugger Bognor!"
And an atheist philosopher, but I forget which (Descartes? Voltaire? Hegel?)
"Dieu me pardonnera. C'est son métier"
(God will forgive me. It's his profession)
Goethe:
"More Bud Lite!"
or something like that...
--
David Brooks dbr...@osf.org
Open Software Foundation uunet!osf.org!dbrooks
Shine out, fair sun, with all your heat! Black winter freezes to his seat...
The boneless fish close quaking lies...the stars in icicles arise!
Rao Akella
In article <1992Dec31.1...@osf.org>, dbr...@osf.org (David Brooks) writes:
>
> And an atheist philosopher, but I forget which (Descartes? Voltaire? Hegel?)
>
> "Dieu me pardonnera. C'est son métier"
> (God will forgive me. It's his profession)
Are you quite sure? My references tag this to be something the Empress
Catherine the Great said (I don't think these were her last words, though):
"I shall be an autocrat: that's my trade. And the good Lord will forgive me:
that's his."
There goes a secure person who's "happy-to-be-me." :-)
Aki Taskinen
> "I don't feel so good."
> Last words of Luther Burbank
Perhaps. :) How about this one:
"I'm alive!"
Last words of Aleksis Kivi
Jan Garefelt
How about:
-Don't you think I know what I'm doing?
-You and what army?
-If you are so smart, why are you still a cop?
-You run, I stall them!
-It's just a scratch...
-I'll just close my eyes for a minute... (by freezing people)
--
...
(O-O)
----oOO--( )--OOo----------------------------------------------------------
Jan Garefelt
Phone: Int + 46 8 6617002 Email: d90...@nada.kth.se
Snail-Mail: Jan Garefelt, Sandelsgatan 42(4tr), S-115 33 Stockholm
Student at the Royal Institute of Technology, Stockholm Sweden
(Computer Science)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nathan Otto Siemers
Jan> said: Nntp-Posting-Host: dront.nada.kth.se
Jan> How about:
Jan> -Don't you think I know what I'm doing? -You and what army?
Jan> -If you are so smart, why are you still a cop? -You run, I
Jan> stall them! -It's just a scratch... -I'll just close my eyes
Jan> for a minute... (by freezing people)
Yikes, how about.
Uh Oh - The last words from the Shuttle Challenger's crew.
--
--
/ | / /__| / /---/ /__| / | / nat...@chemres.tn.cornell.edu
News Administrator
>enp...@gdr.bath.ac.uk (N J A Thorne) writes:
>| Can anyone recommend to me a good (and accurate)
>| source of "famous last words" quotes? Is there
>| such a thing as a book on the subject??
>Since everybody else seems to be ignoring this request, and posting
>their favorites...
Well, I'm not going to ignore the request. I suggest "Panati's Extraordinary
Endings of Practically Everything and Everybody" Charles Panati, ISBN
0-06-055181-X (or 0-06-096279-8 for the paperback). Harper and Row, New
York. It's the only book I've seen with a good collection of "famous last
words". Inspite of the good concept, it was actually a disappointing book -
not as good as his other book "Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things".
--
I'm the News Administrator at this site, and you're not!
I just administer the news, I don't make or state policy.
Ken Kittlitz
Here's a couple. Sorry if there are any inaccuracies, or if someone has
already posted these.
An officer in the US Civil War was inspecting his troops
while enemy snipers were active. When warned to be careful, he said:
"Are you kidding? They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist--"
and collapsed, shot through the head.
A pilot friend of mine mentioned that when the "black box" is recovered
from an airplane crash site, the last words on it are usually something
like "OHHHHHH SHIIIIIITTTT!!!!". But in one instance, the captain is
clearly heard to say:
"Point your toes; we're going in deep!"
Ken
Bertram Walsh
> -- Nero
Well, if you believe Suetonius, these were not even his antepenulti-
mate words. Nero later reproached himself for his troubles in Greek
quite a bit (man of culture, you know). When the horsemen who were to
have captured him alive were heard coming, he quoted the Iliad (quote
on request). He then stabbed himself in the throat. When the horse-
men showed up, he said "Sero!" [Too late!] and then "Haec est fides!"
[Here's fidelity for you!], which were the actual last words as
recorded (at a considerably later time) by Suetonius.
Thayne Forbes
: Well, I'm not going to ignore the request. I suggest "Panati's Extraordinary
: Endings of Practically Everything and Everybody" Charles Panati, ISBN
: 0-06-055181-X (or 0-06-096279-8 for the paperback). Harper and Row, New
: York. It's the only book I've seen with a good collection of "famous last
: words". Inspite of the good concept, it was actually a disappointing book -
: not as good as his other book "Extraordinary Origins of Everyday Things".
Although not exactly what you asked for, Malcolm Forbes wrote a little
book a few years ago (have to be a few years ago huh...) called
'They went that-a-way' It was about the ultimate dimise of lots of
people. A lot of it was quite good, and there were a few last words.
--
Thayne Forbes
tha...@unislc.slc.unisys.com
Haavard Fosseng
And an atheist philosopher, but I forget which (Descartes? Voltaire? Hegel?)
"Dieu me pardonnera. C'est son mitier"
(God will forgive me. It's his profession)
I've seen this attributed top Heinrich Heine, on his deathbed.
H}vard Fosseng
aa...@atlantis.uucp
: A pilot friend of mine mentioned that when the "black box" is recovered
: from an airplane crash site, the last words on it are usually something
: like "OHHHHHH SHIIIIIITTTT!!!!". But in one instance, the captain is
: clearly heard to say:
: "Point your toes; we're going in deep!"
A pilot friend of mine has stated that if she ever knows she's not going to
make it, that she's going to say something to the effect of, "Oh my God,
where's that light coming from? It's so bright!" to get a UFO-hunt on the
move.
--
---Alfvaen(Still looking for "October's Baby")
"I'm gonna follow my feelings...I'm gonna follow my senses...I'm gonna follow my compass!" --Lone Justice
Current Album--Spinal Tap:Break Like The Wind
Current Read--OnSpec Winter '92
William Gathergood
Bible. His visitor asked him: "Bill, what are you doing reading the Bible?"
Fields answered, "Looking for loop-holes."
I don't know if these were his last words, but he did die that day.
Bill Gathergood
John O'Leary
>
> Uh Oh - The last words from the Shuttle Challenger's crew.
Wasn't it "Who let that f***ing woman drive?"
Steve Masticola
- Daniel Webster, Oct. 24, 1852
Ahmad Hashem
me," but shortly afterwards he added fretfully: "And even he did not
understand me."
Pete J Suters
There's a comedian over here in Britain called Jack Dee who came
out with a great string of famous last words. He came up with
the idea of a Black Box Recorder for cars, so that you could
find out the last thing that was said in the car before crashing!
"'Reduce Speed Now'. Hmmmmm, I think I know when to apply MY
brakes ...." <CRASH>
"Here, let ME tune that radio ...." <CRASH>
"Mum, Dad, I want to be a woman!" <CRASH>
pete j suters ---- bath university ---- email: p.j.s...@uk.ac.swurcc
___ ___ /-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|___) | / A Huge Ever Growing Brain That Rules The Centre
| | / Of The Ultraworld
(_/ /=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
John Rickert
>
>In article <1992Dec31.1...@osf.org>, dbr...@osf.org (David Brooks) writes:
>>
>> And an atheist philosopher, but I forget which (Descartes? Voltaire? Hegel?)
>>
>> "Dieu me pardonnera. C'est son métier"
>> (God will forgive me. It's his profession)
>
>Are you quite sure? My references tag this to be something the Empress
>Catherine the Great said (I don't think these were her last words, though):
>
The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations attributes the French saying
to Heinrich Heine.
Rao Akella
In article <1993Jan5.1...@news.vanderbilt.edu>, rick...@athena.cas.vanderbilt.edu (John Rickert) writes:
> >>
> >> "Dieu me pardonnera. C'est son métier"
> >> (God will forgive me. It's his profession)
> >
> to Heinrich Heine.
Looks like we're both right. Heine did say these words on his deathbed, but
Empress Catherine the Great is attributed to have said the nearly similar:
"I shall be an autocrat: that's my trade. And
the good Lord will forgive me: that's his."
In fact the Oxford cross-references the Empress' quotation to Heine's, (though
I don't think there should be any question as to who said it first, since the
Empress died a year before Heine was born).
Patrick Chester
]
]How about:
]
]-Don't you think I know what I'm doing?
]-You and what army?
]-If you are so smart, why are you still a cop?
]-You run, I stall them!
]-It's just a scratch...
]-I'll just close my eyes for a minute... (by freezing people)
From rec.games.frp.misc.....
A whole bunch of them.
If you don't like role-playing games then hit 'n' now
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
FAMOUS LAST WORDS 372 items last change: 12-08-92
collected by Oliver Rosenkranz (ro...@cs.tu-berlin.de)
Thanx to the following persons and groups...
Jens Fiedler
UKC Adventure Gaming Society
Jim Vassilakos
Greg Schmidt
Thomas Mueller
Michael Heggen
vo...@daimi.aau.dk (don't know his real name)
Richie Saunders
Mad Chris
Jani Lahti
Sami Merila
flin...@mta.ca (don't know the real name)
Jeremy L. Hart
Pete ...(20059.2...@ul.ie)
Tom Da Mao
Marko Pirneskoski
Patrick Chester
Keith C. McCormick
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=(please don't remove the Authors)=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
001-"Let's go in."
002-"Let's not go in."
003-"I follow them."
004-"I stab the dragon and tell it to get off me."
005-"I drink the bottle marked POISON on the off-chance that it's the
extra-healing potion."
006-"I kill it."
007-"Let me handle this."
008-"Whaddya mean, a pentagram only has FIVE sides?"
009-"What a useless scroll. It just says, HASTUR HASTUR HASTUR over and over
again..."
010-"I though YOU brough the food!"
011-"Why is your torch flame turning blue?"
012-"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH"
013-"Trust me."
014-"I never get lost."
015-(A corridor ahead is full of brown mold)
"I cast Fireball down the hall, then send my fire elemental to investigate."
016-"Dammit, this thing won't die!"
017-a)"I bet without Mjolnir you're a real wuss."
b)"He looks like a wuss to me."
018-"He hit me for HOW MUCH?????"
019-"They're only kobolds!"
020-"Hey, this chest just bit me!"
021-"I try to move silently in plate armor..."
022-"I didn't find any traps !!"
023-"Wonder what this button does ?"
024-"Don't worry, he is probably just first level."
025-"This 250' wall has so many holes, it should be easy to climb."
026-"I'll just close my eyes and walk up to the dracolisk holding up my mirror"
027-"Can I eat this green slime?"
028-"I'll just walk up to the dragon invisibly"
029-"Why is this man speaking in sign language?"
030-"This type of undead can't drain levels"
031-"I'll open the door, sneak up on him from behind and backstab him!"
032-"We are in luck! The dragon is sleeping"
033-"That's only a statue"
034-"There is no trap on the door, so let's open it"
035-"Look, behind you!!!" Said by a gnome(pc) to an ogre as a disliked
parttymember crept up. End of the other member.
036-"I have this dungeon at home, I know where everything is!"
037-"Don't worry, the DM won't hose me"
038-"We'll untie the prisoners and lock them in the closet."
039-"Why can't we take Clarissa (Disguised evil high priestess) with us?"
040-"How much will you give me for this idol I found (cursed)?"
041-"I'm not powerful enough, can't you just give me second level."
042-"Don't I get the farie fire bonus on my parry."
043-Star Wars:"Stormtroopers can't hit a Wampa at this dist..."
044-Traveller:"Who took the battery out of my grav belt?"
045-"They're wearing blue robes? They must be Druids. Roll for initiative,
suckers." (At which point the polymorphed Bone Devils ate him.)
046-"I see HOW MANY wights?!" (from the crypts of Ravenloft)
047-"Don't worry, wyvern don't attack unless they're provoked."
048-"You watch the door, I'll take out the Gas Spore (Beholder) that's guarding
the treasure."
049-"A Nightmare, huh? I'll attack for one round and prepare to run."
050-"I'll take off my armor so I'm silent and slip past the dragon."
051- "They need a twenty to hit me, I'm invincible"
052-(While trapped in a dungeon..) : "Don't worry, I have a plan!!!"
053-"I bet that without Mjolnir you're a real wimp."
054-"Who's the bitch with the spiders?"
055-"We killed all monsters on this level."
056-"I've been here before. There are no traps in this section."
057-"What do you mean 18 meter long crocodile--you just said crocodile."
058-"Well ...., I'll touch it again"
059-"I attempt to disbelieve"
060-"I cast a fireball" (into a 10'x10'x10' room)
061-"I know if I draw a card I'll get the VOID."
062-GM:"You're very lucky, you all don't know how lucky you are! Save or take
210 points of damage"
063-GM:"You don't get your +5 for being a dwarf, because it's special bodak
power"
064-" It's OK, I trust her..." ... *BOOM!!!!!!*
065-"Stand back you wimps. I'll kill it."
066-"Oops."
067-"OK! I moon the Balrog!"
068-"My first arrow MISSED the magic-user pointing at me?? OK, I shoot again!"
069-"Where'd that thief go now?"
070-"Trap? What trap?"
071-"So what?"
072-"Don't be silly. If this was really the ship's "Self-Destruct Button",
do you think they'd leave it lying around where anyone could press it?"
073-"Hmmm...the sign on the door says, "AIRLOCK". I wonder what's inside."
074-"You're all a bunch of wimps!! I'll prove to you myself that an entire
orc stronghold is no match for your average barbarian."
075-"All right, we're in an unexplored dungeon in total darkness with no
light sources or infravision...Hey, I know!! Let's yell and scream a lot
so we can locate each other by sound!!"
076-"I'm going to kill our captives anyway, and I don't give a damn whether
the other goody-good PC's like it or not."
077-"Y'know, since our druid's been so obnoxious, it would probably serve him
right if we set his precious forest on fire."
078-"A clever bluff, Agent N42, but not clever enough. You see, right away I
recognized your `pistol' as a cleverly disguised cigarette lighter."
079-"A creature with two BABOON heads on a scaly REPTILIAN body? With
TENTACLES for arms? Hunh. Must be some stupid wizard's magical construct.
Let's kill it."
080-"Yes, it's true I humiliated the DM in front of the debating team
Wednesday, but he's much too broad-minded to take it out on my character."
081-"OK, O Mighty Odin, as long as you're not gonna answer my prayers, I'm
gonna tell ya what I REALLY think of ya!"
082-"I drop trough and expose myself to the arch-mage as a gesture of contempt."
083-"Well, guys, I'm sorry my activities in the last town got us all tarred
and feathered, but you're not going to hold that against me, are you?"
084-"No, I'm sure there's some stipulation that says a disintegrate spell
won't work if the spellcaster casts it on himself. Here, I'll prove it."
085-"Oops, I spilled flaming oil on my beard. I'd better wash it off after
we kill this fire lizard."
086-"Well, we know he's LAWFUL evil, so he should keep his word when he
promised not to betray us."
087-"So I'm safely across the pit? Whew! For a minute there I was worried
that you might remember my encumbrance penalties."
088-"Well, as long as I've stumbled into Princess Savitra's bedroom, I might
as well try to seduce her."
089-"Thank God!! A hobgoblin camp up ahead! Maybe they can help heal our
wounded!"
090-"Don't worry! The chances of me blowing a climb walls roll twice, at my
level, are infinitesimal."
091-"All right, I jump...Now on the way down, I activate my ring of feather
fall...no, wait, didn't I lend it to Jim?"
092-"So you're Tiamat, huh? Are you evil? Yes? Would you like to convert?"
093-"I cast a `gate' spell and gate in the Iraqi Air Force."
094-"Well, *I* trust our party thief, and if he says this door isn't trapped,
that's good enough for me."
095-"Well, I didn't much like this character, anyway...Here goes nothing..."
096-"I swing the Toxic Avenger's mop at the grenade so I can bat it across the
room at the aliens...Wait! Isn't that grenade Contact Fused ???"
097-"All right, I guess Toronaga's right. There can't possibly be anything on
the other side of this airlock. Why not open the damned thing."
098-"Whistling sounds? Naw, they can't have a grenade launcher!"
099-"Okay, there's nothing guarding the bridge. I go through the door and find
the helm."
100-"They can't possibly outflank us. We have a multi-scanner!"
101-"Come on! Arrows versus Kevlar?"
102-"What do you mean Tsu Han's pilotting the shuttle? Does he even have
Insystem Pilot? WHY ARE YOU SMILING AND SHAKING YOUR HEAD?"
103-"So that giant fell into the pit? I'll jump over it and get his treasure."
104-"Oh, that sorceress looked a little pale when she examined the mirror which
has the pentagram in front of it on the floor. I think I'll break the
mirror."
105-"It's not trapped, you just want it to yourself."{He still got it for
himself.}
106-"Me first Me first."
107-"Dinosaur? Hey, no problem, right Balinor?"
108-"You call yourself a barbarian, you son of a witch ?"
109-To powerful demon: "Try me sh*t breath!"
110-To sleeping dragon: "Oops, sorry...didn't mean to disturb you."
111-"Come on, we haven't found any traps so far."
112-Ranger: "What do I see?"
DM:"Do you remember the trap that killed Indy's guide in Raiders of the
Lost Ark?"
113-"Diamonds ... Gold... Saphires !!! Terry! Terry, we're rich, we're
rich, we're fabulously wealthy !!!! ...Terry ..... Terry ??"
114-"Let's walk this way."
115-"Hey folks, follow me, I remember the way to the dungeon exit."(Lost)
116-"I never get to have any fun!"
117-"You mean they get to use the critical hit chart too?"
118-"Hey, I know a dragon when I see one."
119-"What do you mean the whole room we're in detects as a trap?"
120-"Hey you! Frost Giant! How's the weather up there?"
121-"Just watch, I bet I get the one item that's cursed."
122-"I'm invincible!"
123-"Don't worry. I know what I'm doing!"
124-"Stop!"
125-"A sign labeled `pit'? I walk up to it."
126-"No problem. That's easy!"
127-"Hey, I found it. I'm keeping it."
128-"I think we'll have to reason with him."
129-"Hah! I'm not dead yet. I still have five hit points."
130-"Oh, no. We're being rescued. How embarrassing!"
131-"Yeah, I know it's dangerous, but think of the experience points."
132-"I stand right underneath the Fire Giant and point my wand straight up."
133-"Don't worry. I've got a plan."
134-"They can't see me. I'm invisible!"
135-"I wonder what's in here?"
136-"He wouldn't try that trick again!"
137-"Trust me, guys."
138-"Just because you're a dragon doesn't mean you can push ME around."
139-"They don't look so tough."
140-"I'm SURE there are no traps."
141-"I actively disbelieve!"
142-"What do you mean trolls regenerate!?!"
143-"Here kitty, kitty, kitty..."
144-"I'll open it."
145-"It seems easy enough"
146-"I think he can be trusted."
147-"Those noises are probably nothing."
148-"I'll pull the lever."
149-"Money!"
150-"Magic is for wimps."
151-"Oh. He'll miss. Just look at my AC."
152-"Oh no! Let's go help them!"
153-"Run away!"
154-"I want to kill something."
155-"All clear, guys."
156-"Gummy werebears? They should be cake to kill once they turn human."
157-"Wait a minute, didn't the old man say something about a curse?"
158-"Hey, where'd all the big spiders come from?"
159-"Okay, Ed, your underwear explodes!"
160-"Bob, you have any grenades left? Throw me one..."
161-"AGAIN!?!?!"
162-"He shot out my eye? Okay, I tear out my other eye and throw it at him
as a gesture of defiance."
163-"I pull the metal ring out of the sphere."(Recognize a Holy Hand Grenade?)
164-"This is a push-over dungeon."
165-"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."
166-"I'll use my taunt skill."
167-"Your mother was a Gully Dwarf."
168-"My God will protect me."
169-"You wouldn't dare!"
170-"Hey, we're out! We're safe!"
171-"I'll try it on."
172-"C'mon! We're a team!"
173-"You don't look like a mage!"
174-"It'd be stupid to trap this!"
175-"I'll kick the door in!"
176-"It could be dangerous!"
177-"Here, hold this rope while I go down."
178-"I thought you brought the food!"
179-"Well, if you didn't belch, who did?"
180-"Isn't there anything exciting in this dungeon?" (said to GM)
181-"Uh guys? Hello? Anyone?"
182-"Dragons give you a lot of Exp."
183-"I know an illusion when I see one."
184-"Who's the bitch with the spiders?" (ahhh! the infamous Lloth)
185-"I sit on the pale lady with the funny teeth." (Ahhh! the infamous vampire)
186-"Mysterious shadows in the room? I'm not scared --- you can't spook me!"
187-"There's a smell of gas, huh? Well, my lantern is hooded. It ought to be
safe."
188-"Take off my armor and try to swim? Forget it --- I worked hard to get this
+3 plate mail. Besides, the DM never lets anyone die --- he wouldn't
let me drown, would he?"
189-"I cast a lightning bolt at the ochre jelly."
190-"Lightning bolts don't ricochet off stone walls, do they?"
191-"A ballista? What's that? How many dice of damage does it do?" {Twenty.It's like a
crossbow, only MUCH larger.}
192-"So what if he calls the guard? A backwater town like this can't have
a very big militia."
193-"Only six inches long? Ha... Wait, you don't mean six _scale_ inches,
do you?" {said in miniature-figures-game. Character itself was 3/4" high.}
194-"...and then I... Uh, guys? Why are looking at me like that? Guys?"
{After using a spell called "Polymorph Other" }
195-"What do you mean, `It doesn't work' ?" {Item with no more charges left.}
196-"Oh these, I've fought them before..."
197-"Then I'll hit him back!" {spoken at the start of a bar brawl.}
198-"I'm bored..."
199-"Quick! What did that scroll say ?"
200-"How did he dissappear like that ?" {About a hostile warrior with a ring
of invisibility and two attacks per round.}
201-"I'll try to pick his pockets." {Pockets belonged to a level 30 mage.}
202-"Maybe we should just kill him."
203-"Read it to me." {It was a fireball scroll.}
204-"You mean there's more ?" {About undeads which entered the room}
205-"MAGIC ITEMS!"
206-"He looks like a sunburnt elf? Huh."
207-"I'll light a fire." (In the woods at night (attracted bears)}
208-"You'd have to be a GOD to smile after that hit!"
209-GM:"You DID take the swimming skill?" (to a player when character fell
overboard.)
210-"I'll stand guard." (Didn't want to enter orc cave.Orcs were out. Orcs
came back.)
211-"What do you mean I hear water?" {in a tunnel}
212-"I bar the door!" {Door opened inward.}
213-"I'll cover you!"
214-"Take out a Beholder's eyes, and Bingo!"
215-"I can't possibly miss..."
216-"Don't worry, I can hit him! I can hit him!"
217-"Shut up, bird!" {to a parrot who happened to be repeating the True Name of
a demon which subsequently exterminated the party}
218-"But he has to be our friend!"
219-"How would you like to have this sword?"
220-NPC:"Take this ring as a token of my esteem." {This party no longer accepts
gifts from unknown NPC's.}
221-PLAYER:"BEGONE THINGS OF EVIL!!!" REPLY:"Begone thing of good."
222-"I go through the door... Wait, I check for traps!"
223-"Don't be silly. That kind of monster NEVER follows you."
224-"I run up to the monster, throw my magic net over it, and try to take the
jewel from around its neck." {But nets don't stop creatures from biting.}
225-"Hmmm... odd-colored walls. Well, I touch one." {turned to stone}
226-"I wonder what the black-and-yellow striped ring above the seat does?"
{ Ejection Seat. No atmosphere and no vacc-suit.}
227-"What do you mean, vacc-suit proficiency? I thought it was perfectly
straightforward, like wearing clothes..."
[From a character attempting to fight hand-to-hand in one.]
228-"But the directions SAID to `pull pin and throw' !"
[From a beautifully role-played traveller character from a non-
technological world. He was given a scout ship survival pack,
which among other gimcracks, contained concussion grenades.
When he got in trouble, of course, he pulled the pin out of
one and threw it ("it" being the pin, naturally)...]
229-"Uh, what does 'explosive decompression' mean?"
230-"Why the hell do you always put `Graf' before your name? Is that this
backward planet's equivalent of `Duke' or something?"
231-"Don't worry - I have Pilot-7."
232-"What do you mean `energy weapons are illegal' ?"
233-"DO NOT OPEN"
234-"Easy kill."
235-"I've got you now!"
236-"Is this one really able to breath fire?"
237-"Trust me. I know what I'm doing"
238-"I open the door and see who it is." {in response to a knock on the door}
239-"I jump off the roof - He won't get my last HP then."
240-"Oh cute! Look at the fuzzy little cubs!"
241-"Your armor is too noisy. Wait here and I'll scout ahead."
242-"I explain to the ogre that it was an honest mistake."
243-"Oh, he puts those in all of his dungeons. It's a gas spore."
244-"Hubba hubba! The nymph's taking off her clothes!"
245-"Whoever did this must be long gone by now."
246-"Easy, boy. What's this stupid horse's problem?"
247-"You mean ... this ... is the last ... torch?"
248-"Oh don't worry. The poisonous ones have orange stripes."
249-"I really didn't know it was against the law."
250-"You racist! They're elves. So what if they're black?"
251-"This flickering torch light is playing tricks on my eyes. It almost
seemed as though that chest moved by itself."
252-"Demogorgon."
253-"What's the duration of this Fly spell?"
254-"I don't understand. It should be dead by now."
255-"Finally! I thought that troll would never die."
256-"If we look brave and fearless, they won't attack."
257-"I'de feel better if we had some crampons. Oh, what the hell, let's go
for it."
258-"I wouldn't worry about the thieves' guild -- they don't have a clue who
did it."
259-"Aha! So you're the [killer/spy/vampire]!"
260-"It doesn't look very fast; we can easily swim across."
261-"While they're fighting the dragon, I sneak around behind him and examine
his hoard."
262-"I wish we had a 10 foot pole. Oh well."
263-"Ha ha ha! Let's put bookworms in his spell research library."
264-"I rolled a 20. How could that be a miss?"
265-"I've got plenty of spells; I don't need to carry a weapon."
266-"I'm heir to the crown. They wouldn't dare!"
267-"Don't you understand? The odds will be even. If we can't see them, they
can't see us."
268-"Who's bringing up the rear?"
269-"It's only one wight. The others are just ghouls."
270-"But [longbows/match locks/nuclear weapons] haven't been invented yet..."
271-"Look, I don't care what you think of her, or her "demonic smile." She's
hot to trot. So, if you'll excuse us..."
272-"I've got better things to do than run your petty errands, your highness."
273-"What?! I thought you said fifTEEN kobolds."
274-"It'll be a short ocean voyage. One week's worth of food and water will be
enough."
275-"I won't fall in; I just want a better look at what's down there."
276-"Ochre jelly? Ok, everyone, break out the bread and the peanut butter."
277-"Quit clowning around. Look, whichever one of you is doing that, it's not
funny."
278-"Hey! Where's my components?"
279-"For some reason I had always imagined that bugbears were somewhat smaller."
280-"A trap? That's exactly what we're supposed to expect. I think this DM is
more imaginative than that."
281-"After what we took, he won't be able to afford an assassin."
282-"They're usually not aggressive. If we leave it alone, it'll leave us
alone."
283-"Wanna see my new spell?"
284-"Something's wrong with my d20."
285-"That was no healing potion! I'm gonna kill that swindler!"
286-"Ha! That's the oldest trick in the book."
287-"Hey, Bill, cast a Detect Invisibility, quick. Bill. Bill? Where's Bill?"
288-"Cover me."
289-"I think it's asleep."
290-"Look at the size of those tracks!"
291-"Can you make out this next rune? It looks like someone spilled coffee on
this scroll."
292-"..23..24..Well, that's the last of his arrows."
293-"Watch this."
294-"Well, if I remember correctly, it's AC 7, 3+1 HD, 1d8 damage. Hmm..."
<scribble> <scribble>
"I should defeat him around the 4th round and still have
about 12.5 hit points left. Ok, let's rock!"
295-"No problem! I'll just cast a ... whoops, I forgot. I'm just 2nd level,
aren't I?"
296-"Did you see that guy's head? I wonder what did this."
297-"Damned be him who first cries, 'Hold, enough!'"
298-"If you cut me down, I will only become more powerful."
299-"Zoinks! I sure hope that's just Scooby behind me."
300-"I ain't afraid of no ghost."
301-"Geez, I'm kind of low on funds. Ok, I'll take 500 gp for the healing
potion."
302-"I bet it's just an illusion."
303-"Well, at least I tried...?"
304-"It's only an illusionary red dragon!"
305-"I'll attempt to patch it up." {...finding a hole in the cargo bay of the
the orbital shuttle}
306-"I'll cut the red wire."
307-"Hey, I'll try to hide in shadows." {Room full of Shadows(kind of monster
in AD&D)}
308-"I cast a powerball." {inside an elevator}
309-"I cast a hellblast." {at a gas station}
310-"Let's blow open the airlock."
311-"I jump from our car into theirs."
312-"YOU are the UGLIEST guy I've ever seen." {to an 8 foot tall troll}
313-"What do you mean 'the bullets are just bouncing off'!"
314-"O.K. pal, take your best shot."
315-"Let's rush them."
316-"There's no way they'll ever find us."
317-"What could possibly go wrong?"
318-"Him? What is HE doing here? I thought we killed him!"
319-"I throw a grenade at them." {in the middle of a weapons storhouse}
320-"Guys, I'm out of ammo."
321-"I tackle her." {She was a wolf shapeshifter in human form}
322-"Dragon? What dragon?"
323-"I shoot a missile at one of the wasps."
324-"Does anybody in the group have Doc Wagon?"
325-"A juggernaught? What the hell's a juggernaught?"
326-"Get him!"
327-"I give him the finger..."
328-"He has a threat rating of WHAT ?"
329-"Guys, there's some giant bugs in the hallway."
330-"Do you think it's a toxic spirit?"
331-"What's with that wierdo with the teeth?"
332-"I put my AK97 under my coat and go to the subway."
333-"How many teeth does it have?" {character used to make chains of the
teeth of his dead opponents}
334-"'Brak'? That's a stupid name for a barbarian!"
335-"Blue, no...wait, Yellow! Aaaaarghhhh" {to a bridgekeeper}
336-"Shit, it's a minefield, leggit !!!"
337-"Call me Kregor the Undying!"
338-"Let's split."
339-"They will flee in terror from my <name of Assault Mech Class>"
340-"Feel like surrendering ?"
341-"Give you my T.O.&E ?! Figure it out yourself..."
342-"It's only infantry."
343- while rolling dices "Please God, not an ammo explosion..."
344-"Stupid fool. Tried to scare me by firing LRMs at my feet. I charge
right at him." {into artillery-layed minefield}
345-"Sure you can use the LRM Carrier platoon in this scenario ."
346-"Airstrike? Sure.....But I get one too."
347-"I'll hide my ship near the planet's ring?" {which is where several hundred
nuclear missile-equipped automated battlesats were hidden}
348-"That's an interesting headband you're wearing pilot Smith."
{kamikaze headband}
349-"I'm sure reinforcements will get here on time. They promised."
350-"Say, what's that red dot on your forehead?" {laser sight}
351-"I'm a vampire. No mortal can kill me."
352-"What a stupid 'bot." {It was a hunter-killer drone}
353-"Jamming at full power, they'll never scan through that!!"
{enemy used anti-radiation missiles}
354-"What kind of idiot would set boobytraps in his own home?"
355-"No, I wasn't reading the module. I was just looking at the pictures."
356-"Black Ice in Mom and Pop's Grocery?!" {front for money launderers}
357-"Funny, doesn't *look* like a cyberpsycho...." {but it was one}
358-"Corporate geek, huh? I throw my beer on his fancy suit!"
{Arasaka exec with bodyguards nearby}
359-"No security force is *that* fast responding."
360-"I have a very bad feeling about this."
361-"I'm sure they didn't trace me."
362-"I throw the grenade..." (Onto a proch less than ten feet away)
363-"We'll let him fire the mortar, he's not to good with a gun."
364-"Um... I charge the machine gun nest."
365-"I think I'll rob that place."
366-"Naah. He's the DM, he never kills PCs."
367-"I turn the red gem so that the little carving points right at the one on
the wall above it. Then I rotate the ..."
368-"No, you idiot, they can't hear us crawling around out here!"
{yelled to another PC}
369-"So they have a tank...big deal! I have an M-16!!! I can kill it."
370-"What do you mean they threw it back ?"
371-"There is only two left..."
372-"No, sir. We're gonna protect this fire base. They won't get past us...
...Arc Light ?!?! What do you mean the B-52s are on their way ???"
{after being ordered to evacuate a camp that will be attacked in four
hours}
--
Patrick Chester |---------------------------------------------------|
Politically Incorrect |"The earth is too fragile a basket in which to keep|
Future Lunar Colonist | all your eggs." Robert A. Heinlein |
Another Damn Exception |"The meek can *have* the Earth. The rest of us are |
claypigeon | going to the stars." Robert A. Heinlein |
Many other stupid titles |---------------------------------------------------|
Janne Himanka
--Dutch Schultz
"It is raining, Anita Huffington[?]."
--Ulysses Grant
"Quien es? [Who is it?]"
--Billy the Kid
Janne
--
Most of the girls, as they walked along, seemed to be % sh...@phoenix.oulu.fi
absorbed in silent prayer; but he supposed, on second % TKOP...@FINOU.BITNET
thoughts, it was only gum they were thus incessantly % sh...@nic.funet.fi
ruminating. Gum, not God. (A. Huxley) % Dept. of Libr.&Inf. Sc
Edgar Hellfritsch
>>>>>> On 2 Jan 93 14:28:41 GMT, d90...@nada.kth.se (Jan Garefelt)
> Jan> said: Nntp-Posting-Host: dront.nada.kth.se
> Uh Oh - The last words from the Shuttle Challenger's crew.
I thought they were: 'Hey okay, why not let _her_ steer?'
Edgar
---
--------------------------------------------
| Edgar Hellfritsch: |/ |
| (o) |
| "I've got the habit uu )o |
| of typing the Rabbit." ~~~~~~~~~ |
--------------------------------------------
Greg Givler
"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!' Gen. Dan Sickles,
at the Battle of Cold Harbor, I think.
Greg
--
Greg Givler | "There are lies, damned lies, and statistics"
Commodore Product Assurance | - Mark Twain
giv...@cbmvax.commodore.com |
===============================================================================
Klaus Ole Kristiansen
>Greg Givler | "There are lies, damned lies, and statistics"
>Commodore Product Assurance | - Mark Twain
Statistics are like lampposts: they are good to lean on, but
they don't shed much light.
- Storm P
Klaus O K
Bob Stettler
>> In article <38...@cbmvax.commodore.com>
>> giv...@bermuda.cbm.commodore.com (Greg Givler) writes:
>>
>>
>> My favorite:
>>
>> "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!' Gen. Dan Sickles,
>> at the Battle of Cold Harbor, I think.
Close. It was Gen. John Sedjweck (sp?) at the Battle of Spotsylvania.
Right army and campaign though.
--
+-+
+-+ Bob Stettler, bo...@ichips.intel.com
| | Intel Corporation, M/S JF1-19
+-+ 5200 N.E. Elam Young Pkwy, Hillsboro, OR 97124
Anna Filippone
One of my personal faves, though I don't know who said it:
75% of all statistics are useless.
Anna
--
"Mark but this flea, and mark in this,
Anna Filippone How little that which thou deniest me is:
an...@psych.toronto.edu Me it sucked first, and now sucks thee,
And in this flea our two bloods mingled be." - Donne
Mark Schnitzius
>In article <1993Jan12.1...@odin.diku.dk> kl...@diku.dk (Klaus Ole Kristiansen) writes:
>>giv...@bermuda.cbm.commodore.com (Greg Givler) writes:
>>
>>>Greg Givler | "There are lies, damned lies, and statistics"
>>>Commodore Product Assurance | - Mark Twain
>>
>>Statistics are like lampposts: they are good to lean on, but
>>they don't shed much light.
>> - Storm P
>>
>One of my personal faves, though I don't know who said it:
> 75% of all statistics are useless.
Or, more subtly, my favorite:
50% of the citizens of this country have a below average
understanding of statistics.
I've said this to people, only to have them reply "Yeah, I believe it."
--mark
Steven Hovater
>Commodore Product Assurance | - Mark Twain
Actually, I believe this is generally attributed to Disraeli.
--
Steven V. Hovater (703)318-5839
Senior CASE Engineer
Verdix Corporation EMAIL: s...@verdix.com
Andrew Dunn
But I am afraid I don't know the source.
---
Andrew Dunn
Institute of Astronomy |
Madingley Road |
Cambridge, U.K. |
CB3 0HA |
E-mail: a...@mail.ast.cam.ac.uk
mike
|> One of my personal faves, though I don't know who said it:
|>
|> 75% of all statistics are useless.
|>
|> Anna
|>
75% of all people quoting statistics make them up.
or something like that...
no.sig
Eric Klinker
>
>"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!' Gen. Dan Sickles,
>at the Battle of Cold Harbor, I think.
>
Corps commander) prior to being hit in the face with a minie ball at the
battle for Spotsylvania courthouse.
Eric
--
Eric
Michael Tobis
I have the following posted on my office door, from the Milwaukee Journal,
about two years ago (on the front page, yet):
"MATH TEST RESULTS ADD UP TO A FAILURE - Only 14% of eighth grade students
show average proficiency
Washington DC - AP - Just one in seven eighth grade students nationawide
can exhibit average proficiency in mathematics, according to a federal
survey released Thursday."
I am not making this up. I wish I'd kept the date so people could verify
this without looking at my office door...
mt
Peter Dalg}rd
>I have the following posted on my office door, from the Milwaukee Journal,
>about two years ago (on the front page, yet):
>"MATH TEST RESULTS ADD UP TO A FAILURE - Only 14% of eighth grade students
>show average proficiency
>Washington DC - AP - Just one in seven eighth grade students nationawide
>can exhibit average proficiency in mathematics, according to a federal
>survey released Thursday."
>I am not making this up. I wish I'd kept the date so people could verify
>this without looking at my office door...
0,0,0,0,0,0,1 -- average = 1/7 -- number above average = 1/7
HAH! GOTCHA!
(Not to say that the journalists know what they're talking about
of course)
Peter Dalgaard
Statistical(!!) Research Unit
Univ. Copenhagen
(p...@kubism.ku.dk)
Ummm... me!
>an...@psych.toronto.edu (Anna Filippone) writes:
>
>
>> 75% of all statistics are useless.
>
>Or, more subtly, my favorite:
>
> 50% of the citizens of this country have a below average
> understanding of statistics.
One of my fave "stat-type" quotations is:
"The world is divided into two types of people -- those who divide people
into two types, and those who don't."
-- (Does anyone know the author?)
Cheers,
-Mark-
Eric Meeks
>One of my fave "stat-type" quotations is:
>
> "The world is divided into two types of people -- those who divide people
>into two types, and those who don't."
>
> -- (Does anyone know the author?)
You didn't get the quote verbatim, I can't either, but I do remember
where it comes from. It's from Tom Robbins "Still Life with Woodpecker"
and it goes something like:
... Actually there are two types of people in the world, those who
beleive that there are two types of people in the world and those
who are smart enough to know better.
I'm in the first group.
Eric Meeks <me...@icecream.princeton.edu>
"It's got a painful beginning and a predictable ending, if it were
a book, no one would read it" -- semi-drunk friend, slurring on life
Chandra Reddy
Said by an actuarian: "There are three kinds of actuarians --
those can count; and, those who can't!"
Cheers, Chandra.
Jeffrey Shallit
>>Greg Givler | "There are lies, damned lies, and statistics"
>>Commodore Product Assurance | - Mark Twain
>
>Actually, I believe this is generally attributed to Disraeli.
Apparently, it is only attributed to Disraeli by Twain himself.
See Ralph Keyes' _Nice Guys Finish Seventh: False Phrases, Spurious
Sayings, and Familiar Misquotations_, HarperCollins, 1992,
pp. 49-50.
>Steven V. Hovater (703)318-5839
>Senior CASE Engineer
>Verdix Corporation EMAIL: s...@verdix.com
Jeff Shallit
Sean Gugler
>In article <schnitzi....@eola.cs.ucf.edu> schn...@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius) writes:
>>
>>Or, more subtly, my favorite:
>>
>> 50% of the citizens of this country have a below average
>> understanding of statistics.
Presuming equal distribution of "understanding," of course. (Pick an
arbitrary scale for measuring understanding. If most samples occur
at the low end and only a few at the high end, far more than 50% will
have a below average understanding.)
In a similar vein, though,
50% of the high school graduates in this country graduated in the
bottom half of their class.
- Sean
--
Sean Gugler gugle...@cs.yale.edu <-- Internet
P.O. Box 1902 Yale Station gugseap@yalevm <-- Bitnet
New Haven, CT 06520 USA sgu...@music.yale.edu <-- NeXT
(203)-436-0861 We both have truths; are mine the same as yours?
Andrew McRae
> In article <1993Jan14....@jarvis.csri.toronto.edu> ema...@csri.toronto.edu (Ummm... me!) writes:
>>In article <schnitzi....@eola.cs.ucf.edu> schn...@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius) writes:
>>> 50% of the citizens of this country have a below average
>>> understanding of statistics.
> In a similar vein, though,
>
> 50% of the high school graduates in this country graduated in the
> bottom half of their class.
And another variation:
"50% of this country's schoolchildren have IQ's below
average. Under our education policy, we can turn that
around!"
(For what it's worth, I was told it appeared in a New Zealand National
Party candidate's campaign statement, but it's probably completely
apocryphal.)
--
Andrew McRae mc...@husc.harvard.edu
mc...@husc.bitnet
They call me Ren
: In article <1993Jan14....@jarvis.csri.toronto.edu> ema...@csri.toronto.edu (Ummm... me!) writes:
: >In article <schnitzi....@eola.cs.ucf.edu> schn...@cs.ucf.edu (Mark Schnitzius) writes:
: >>
: >>Or, more subtly, my favorite:
: >>
: >> 50% of the citizens of this country have a below average
: >> understanding of statistics.
: 50% of the high school graduates in this country graduated in the
: bottom half of their class.
:
: - Sean
furthermore, 50% of all doctors were in the bottom half of their class at med
school!
--
kewa...@cs.amherst.edu _|_ "the philosophers have only interpreted
kewa...@unix.amherst.edu | the world, in various ways; the point,
kewasi...@amh.amherst.edu | however, is to change it." -k. marx
Seth the Lesser
>
>Presuming equal distribution of "understanding," of course. (Pick an
>arbitrary scale for measuring understanding. If most samples occur
>at the low end and only a few at the high end, far more than 50% will
>have a below average understanding.)
Wrong-o. The word "average" can mean any of three different statistics, not
necessarily (or even often) equal: "mean," "median," and "mode." You are
thinking of the mean here; the quotation uses it to mean the median.
For future reference:
mean = the sum of the data divided by the number of data
median = the value such that exactly 50% of all data not equal
to it are less than it, and 50% greater than it
mode = the most common datum value
Followups to alt.math.flame .
Seth L. Blumberg \ "The whole thing was an accident. No saboteur
sl...@columbia.edu (play) \ could have been so wildly optimistic as to think
se...@ctr.columbia.edu (work) \ he could destroy an airplane this way."
> No one I know shares my opinions, least of all Columbia University. <
Dennis Weeks
> "There are lies, damn lies, and statistics"
have reminded me of a similar remark I saw last July, in The Australian
(for those unfamiliar with it, it's an Aussie newspaper distributed all
over the country, sort of like USA Today), in a rather skeptical review
of Stephen Hawking's books:
"There is speculation, wild speculation, and cosmology"
I believe it was attributed to a professor at some Australian university
but I can't remember who.
Wowbagger The Infinitely Prolonged
Statistics are like bikinis: what they show is important, but what they hide
is vital.
(author unknown)
--
sl...@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu ***** Glen A. Graham *****
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You can't make anything foolproof, | "I have something to say... it is better
Because fools are so ingenious! | to burn out than to fade away!" - Kurgen
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sean Gugler
> 50% of the citizens of this country have a below average
> understanding of statistics.
gugle...@cs.yale.edu (Sean Gugler) writes:
>Presuming equal distribution of "understanding," of course.
sl...@cunixb.cc.columbia.edu (Seth "the Lesser") writes:
>Wrong-o. The word "average" can mean any of three different statistics
Thereby demonstrating my membership of the 50%.
From Tom Robbins, my favorite source of quotes:
Amnesia is not knowing who one is and wanting desperately to find
out. Euphoria is not knowing who one is and not caring. Ecstasy is
knowing exactly who one is -- and still not caring.
Chandra Reddy
|> Statistics:
|>
|> Statistics are like bikinis: what they show is important, but what they hide
|> is vital.
|> (author unknown)
I heard 'the above' as follows:
Statistics are like bikinis; what they reveal is suggestive, and what they
conceal is vital.
I, too, do not know the author..
cheers, chandra.
Michael Chaplin
"Numbers are like people; torture them enough
and they'll tell you anything."
-- unknown to me
Chaplin.
--
=========================================================================
Michael A. Chaplin If you want *their* opinions, ask *them*.
mic...@albert.bu.edu ....The Einstein Papers Project, Boston, Mass., USA
cha...@husc.harvard.edu ....Harvard University, Cambridge, Mass., USA
Jonathan Butt
49 % of all statistics.....are wrong.
- Statistics Canada 1985
--
|----------------------------------------------------------------------------
: Jonathan D. Butt | "You dont need to be a Rocket Surgeon to |
| jb...@garfield.cs.mun.ca | figure that one out !" - Don Cherry |
| jb...@odie.cs.mun.ca | | -----------------------------------------------------------------------------
David C Daye
"Statistician probably on board."
David Daye.
------------------
Daniel L. Reese
51% of all Americans are in the majority.
SNL