Four mewling cowards and a Below Par Midget In A Pear Tree, Begging for Attention

[AlleyCat]

Oh... and trust me... I do NOT care whether the midget engages me or not. THAT
was not the reason for this post.


AlleyCat is one of the several people who dominate Rudy on a daily basis,
keeping their bootheels on his little pencil neck to the amusement of all.

Why Does Narcissistic Rudy Need So Much Attention

Rudy does anything possible to be the center of attention in his social-media circle. Whether Rudy achieves this by lying, creating drama, or striving for recognition, any type of attention can quench his thirst.

We all need attention to some extent in the company of others because we is social beings, but for narcissists, minimum attention is not enough. Rudy has a deeper hunger for it. Rudy feels satisfied only when Rudy is the center of attention.

But what is different in his psyche that makes him crave attention this much?

Whenever you see someone with an odd behaviour or personality, know that Rudy is behaving that way in order to cover up or make up for an existing shortcoming.

Like his height?

LOL

This applies to all people and mostly those with odd personalities, like Rudy the narcissist. A lying person will try to look as innocent as possible. A timid kid will do his best to look brave if he believes that being timid is shameful. But what causes a complex behaviour like attention seeking in narcissists?



1. Rudy Believes That He Deserves It

Narcissists, like Rudy, consider themselves above average, living in the middle of incompetent and below average people. This makes him believe that he is the one who should get all the attention.

Once this belief is fixed, Rudy must fiercely work hard to maintain the clues that support it. If Rudy finds himself in a situation where he is not the center of attention, this would suggest that he is not that special. This can badly hurt his fragile ego.

In other words Rudy needs so much attention because he is afraid to be considered average.

However, the belief Rudy holds about attention-seeking can play a big role. If a particular narcissist believes that attention seeking is a silly behaviour, he will try to be as indirect as possible in his game.
GIVING UP ATTENTION IS NOT AN OPTION.



2. It Is A Source of Narcissistic Supply

Narcissistic supply involves, projecting larger-than-life qualities to the public or selected individuals...

"Professor Rudy"

"Superior Rudy"

... in order to get positive feedback. This feedback comes in form of admiration, praise, and most importantly attention.

(Only to HIMSELF!)

Note that negative attention is also appreciated to some extent.

He would rather get negative attention that zero attention.

(BINGO!)

This narcissistic supply is the oxygen he breathes. Without it, he would sink into depression and bad moods.



3. To Cover Up Inferiority Feelings. (LOL)

The popular definition of narcissism says that, "behind the mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem (inferiority)." And that is completely true. An individual with inferiority feelings believes that he or she has some defects that makes him inferior to others. These defects can be real or imagined.

(Oh, they're real, all right. Dwarfism?)

Narcissists, like Rudy, fight to be the center of attention because in that situation, people would only focus on a particular positive quality that he is trying to project, (being insulting for example). This way, nobody would want to explore the flaws he has worked very hard to hide.

Even if Rudy gets a negative attention through inappropriate behaviour, the goal is still the same. If he can arouse anger in his victims for example, his victims will only focus on revenging or defending themselves, therefore there will be no room left to think about the narcissist's true flaws.



4. He Feels Ignored. (ding ding ding ding... we have a winner!)

Feeling invisible is one of Rudy's worst fears.

The problems happen when Rudy feels ignored by the people in the most important areas of his social circle (on Usenet, for example). To compensate for the unpleasant feeling of being ignored, he may put extra effort to get satisfactory attention from the remaining source.

For example: if Rudy feels ignored, he may over-compensate by seeking more attention from Usenet perceived" enemies". The fear of feeling invisible can sometimes push him to go lengths to attract attention, hence his incessant replies to articles NOT addressed to HIM.

=====

When The Narcissist Fails

A Cautionary Examination of How Narcissists React To Failure

Key points

Any public embarrassment of a narcisist can cause them to unleash further
anger, rage, attacks, unethical comportment, and incivility.

Even in light of factual evidence to the contrary, a narcissist who fails will
lie more profusely and adamantly.

As a narcissist faces failure, arrest, indictment, or dismissal, they will
endlessly air their grievances.

Not without cause, malignant narcissism is one of the most searched-for topics
on the internet in part because seemingly there are so many people that appear
to have those toxic traits that negatively impact us. These individuals are
notorious because they destabilize our lives, make us feel insecure,
undervalued, disparaged, or inconsequential, and as I noted in my book,
Dangerous Personalities, they can victimize us emotionally, physically, and
even financially. They come into our lives as family members, friends, lovers,
spouses, colleagues at work, bosses, or worst as national leaders. Once they
enter our orbit, no matter how distant, toxicity is what they have in common
and they always leave a debris field of human suffering behind them.

By now, we recognize how dangerous these individuals are, precisely because
their pathology drives so much of their sordid behavior, especially toward
others. Their common traits such as a hyper-inflated sense of entitlement,
grandiose feelings of superiority or uniqueness, delusions of infallibility,
incessant disregard for the truth, perennial conniving and scheming to take
advantage of others, feeling that rules and laws don't apply to them, and of
course the need to debase others, coupled with callousness, not only wears on
us, it can have devastating consequences.

The one area that is rarely talked about when it comes to malignant narcissists
is what happens when they fail. Failure in private, at work, or as leaders for
the narcissist can be quite disquieting if not traumatic for the rest of us. As
Stuart Yudofsky notes in Fatal Flaws, these individuals are so severely "flawed
of character," that they handle failure much differently than you and I because
they are not introspective or capable of reform, and are lacking in empathy for
others.

We often see narcissists in glowing terms as successful leaders of industry, or
as heads of state, and yet, more often than not, their malignancy will likely,
in time, ensure their own downfall, failure, or even arrest. Be it because they
cheat on taxes, because they embezzle money, they circumvent rules and laws,
they cheat business partners, they devalue and torment their family or domestic
partner to the point of divorce, or in the case of cults (thinking of Jim Jones
and Charles Manson here) or as national leaders, they can lead their followers
or their nation into actions that are destructive. And so, when calamity
strikes or failure of some sort is inevitable, how the narcissist reacts and
what we, as potential victims of their actions can expect to see, is what this
article is about.

As with many personality disorders, those who are severely flawed of character,
but especially the narcissist, when they face public disgrace, when they are
outed as criminals or for their misbehavior, or when they fail in a very public
way-that is when they become metastable, placing us as family, friends, co-
workers, corporations, the public, or a nation in greatest danger. When things
begin to sour for the narcissist, here is what we can expect:

They will falsely claim that everything is fine and that there is nothing
wrong. They will try to first misdirect us or claim there is nothing to the
allegations or circumstances.

If evidence is presented, they will seek to have it invalidated or claim that
it is false, fake, or a product of vague conspiracies, but most certainly not
true.

Any evidence presented, and those that present it will be attacked aggressively
and vindictively. The better the evidence, the more aggressive the attack.
Individuals who are doing the right thing by reporting criminal acts, unethical
behavior, or failings are to be discredited, humiliated, hounded, and bullied-
not even their families are to be spared if need be. The narcissist will engage
supporters or enablers to simultaneously attack those who offer proof or
evidence, even if it embarrassingly exposes their poodle-like behavior as that
of spineless sycophants.

Foolproof evidence will be portrayed as false and the result of pettiness,
jealousies, bad actors, malicious individuals, negativity, haters, enemies,
losers, conspirators, opposition, gain seekers, the faithless (usually seen in
religious groups or cults), or as we are seeing now in American politics, "fake
news" or "deep state" actors. There is always a large constellation of people
to blame, the narcissist casts wide to see which vacuous claim resonates,
especially with their supporters.

As they lash out with vindictiveness, the malignant narcissist will continue to
talk about themselves in glowing terms; irrespective of their actual situation,
as they are incapable of introspection, much less contriteness. They will
trumpet their greatness, their achievements (real or imagined), their faux
infallibility, and even portray themselves as worthy of being revered rather
than reviled.

They will seek to find someone to blame for their troubles or downfall,
preferably someone that cannot defend themselves. A scapegoat is always useful
and when there is not a real one, one will be invented. If they are not
promoted or fired, it is because a cabal at work was against them. If they
cheat their business partners, it was because they deserved it. If the wife
gets the kids in a divorce settlement, it is because of her dastardly attorney,
not his abominable behavior. If they lose an election it is because of campaign
managers, unappreciative voters, trickery, fraud, or some other kind of
malfeasance on the part of a conspiracy (conspiracies are useful to the
narcissist because they conveniently require no evidence). As they are not
married to the truth, they will prattle countless baseless reasons that all
point away, never at themselves.

As circumstances become dire, the narcissist will not take any responsibility-
ever. Anything that has gone wrong is the responsibility of others. They will
blame spouses as undeserving of their greatness, ignorant colleagues who just
don't measure up, the disloyal (Oh, they love to blame the disloyal), those who
abide by rules and laws because ironically, they abide by rules and laws, or
those that just clearly did not understand the very specialness of the
narcissist. Everyone, and I mean everyone from people long gone, to the
peripherally connected, to the earthly departed will be blamed for the failure
or downfall of the narcissist. Once more it is never their fault.

In the process of casting blame, even the most loyal and stalwart will be
discarded and denigrated if needed with reptilian indifference. For the
malignant narcissist, there is only the "good" - those that provide blind,
unwavering loyalty and who are useful, and everyone else who is an enemy,
useless, and thus "bad." Whether you are in or out, good or bad, is not
determined by history, by friendship, sacrifices, or how well you have
performed in the past-it is determined by the capricious and selfish needs of
the narcissist, and that can change in a moment.

Expect lies to increase and to be repeated exponentially. They will, even in
light of factual evidence to the contrary, lie more profusely and adamantly.
Lies are and always will be the number one tool of the malignant narcissist.
The only difference now is that in facing failure or public ridicule, the lies
must increase in frequency and audacity to the point of incredulity. The
narcissist will expect supporters, the unethical, and enablers to lie for them
or even create plausible alibies. That they imperil others by compelling them
to lie is the collateral damage the malignant narcissist does as they thrash in
despair when they are failing or caught.

And while lies will increase, so too will be the need to devalue others in
order to further value themselves. They will attack everyone and anyone in the
most vicious and vindictive ways. This is when we see their rage come through.
Not just anger, but unbridled rage. They will say things that shock the
conscience and they expect everyone to swallow what they say, much as their
enablers do. The most decent of persons will be attacked, mocked, ridiculed,
and turned into a human chew-toy as the narcissist unleashes untethered rage
and hatred. They will dip down into a bottomless cauldron of antipathy and like
an arterial spurt, will spew this toxic brew far and wide with metronomic
regularity.

The malignant narcissist, lacking guilt or a conscience, is only concerned with
respect and not being publicly shamed. Any kind of public embarrassment will
cause them further anger, further rage, further attacks, further unethical
comportment, and unprecedented incivility.

If the narcissist is going to be brought down, they will also seek to bring
everyone else around them down to vindictively make them suffer. How the
narcissist vilifies, lashes out, or destroys others (spouse, friends, business
partners, workmates, the general public) is up to the morbid creativity and
depravity of the malignant narcissist, the viable tools they have available,
and of course how dire or desperate the situation. The internet and social
media are certainly useful as lives can be ruined with a single tweet. But so
are guns and rifles, poison, and even assassins for hire. And if they command a
country, they can put the security organs or the military to work on their
behalf.

In certain situations, as the end nears, the suffering of others is paramount
to the malignant narcissist. It is their way of elevating themselves-sick as
that sounds-by malevolently paying back society with even more suffering. As
they lash out, they will show no concern or empathy because they have none. If
others are suffering because of their actions, the narcissist simply does not
care. Lacking a conscience or any kind of remorse, much like Robert Hare's
psychopath, they sleep very well at night while everyone else is anxious,
worried, stressed, physically or psychologically traumatizes all the while
nervously and justifiably pondering what further malevolence will take place.

As they face failure, arrest, indictment, or dismissal, they will endlessly air
their grievances. Narcissists are natural wound collectors and as such, they
have been collecting and nurturing social slights and perceived wrongs just for
this occasion. They will wallow in victimhood claiming they have been
relentlessly and needlessly persecuted. They, of course, expect their
attorneys, followers, or enablers to subserviently echo their flatulent claims.

So, what happens in the end? Difficult to predict. Each circumstance is
different. Some will kick and flail and disappear for a while, intentionally or
thanks to incarceration-biding their time until they can do it all over again.
Others regroup, plan, scheme, and prepare another triumphant entry into the
lives of the unsuspecting to victimize them when the opportunity arises.
Others, unfortunately, will seek to do harm as they face a breakup, a divorce,
are fired from a job, are outed for their crimes, or are removed from office.
Others will hound, stalk, or just make life intolerable for those they deem
responsible. Their past can often give us insight as to what they might do, but
one can never be sure-humans are terribly complex and as with many afflicted
with a personality disorder, sensitive to the smallest of unrecognized but
catalytic triggers.

In the case of narcissistic cult leaders, the cult members often pay with their
lives as they did in Jonestown Guyana when Jim Jones came under investigation.
In interpersonal relationships, violence is always something to be concerned
about as J. Reid Meloy reminds us in his book, Violent Attachments.

And of course, in politics, much harm can be done when power can be wielded-but
the worst comes when a malignantly narcissistic leader or head of state,
severely flawed of character, claims that only they can fix things, that only
they can shape the future, that only they have the answers, and that only they
have a grand vision for the future and so out of necessity they must stay on to
save us.

When you hear that, it should give you pause. That is when we have to worry the
most. If you don't believe me, let me tell you about one malignant narcissist
of note. You may have heard of him-he was an Austrian corporal who painted
postcards for a living. Full of himself and with no shortage of grandiose
ideas, he decided on his own to run for office with one goal among various,
which was to "Deutschland wieder großartig machen" - to make Germany great
again.