LOL... This IS Too Funny - Rudy Begs for Attention... Again!

[AlleyCat]

I'm pretty sure Rudy chimed in with his usual lies, JUST for the attention,
since no one included him in on this thread.

As usual, the undeserved narcissistic nerd had to try and show everyone how
smart he THINKS he is, but failed miserably again.

I don't have a fucking CLUE as to why Rudy would chime in with THIS, since NO
ONE used the term "unrefutable" in this thread.

I never saw Rudy Canoza's bullshit reply, but did a little research on Google
Groups and saw this:

> Remember when AlleyPussyBitch (the narcissist)

LOL... he's lost so much brain power to liberalism, he can't come up with any
better insults than the ones *I* gave him. EVERYONE knows this psycho is an
undeserved narcissistic nerd, simply by some of the things he writes and
believes. (see below) ("Professor Canoza?" - hahahahahahahaha)

Uh... no one CARES dipshit.

> used to write it as "unrefutable" facts?

Used to? If I think about it, I'll use it again. I never "stopped" using the
term.

> I pointed out there is no such word

Yes, there is.

> and of course the narcissist argued.

For good reason, nerd.

super70s says... "One such pair of WORDS is irrefutable and unrefutable."

The First Known Use of Unrefutable Was In 1594 - Irrefutable? 1607.

https://thecontentauthority.com/blog/irrefutable-vs-unrefutable

Define Unrefutable

Unrefutable is a term that is used as a synonym for irrefutable. It is an
adjective used to describe something that cannot be refuted.

The words "irrefutable" and "unrefutable" may seem similar, but they have
distinct meanings that should be used correctly to avoid confusion.

How To Use Unrefutable In A Sentence

The word "unrefutable" is a less common variant of "irrefutable" that means the
same thing.

Here are some examples of how to use "unrefutable" in a sentence:

The defendant's alibi was unrefutable, but the jury still found them guilty.
The scientist's research provided unrefutable evidence of the harmful effects
of the chemical.
While the evidence was unrefutable, the defense lawyer still tried to cast
doubt on it.

Overall, it is best to stick with the more commonly recognized "irrefutable" to
avoid confusion or potential criticism.

> Now he realizes I am right.

You've NEVER been right about "unrefutable".

> Too funny!

Yes... reading your bullshit is.

============================================================================

AlleyCat is one of the several people who dominate Rudy on a daily basis,
keeping their bootheels on his little pencil neck to the amusement of all.

You probably spend a small amount of time feeling sorry for Rudy, but elated
when this undeserved narcissist starts spouting his hate and bile.

You see how Rudy treats other people (even fellow gays on the left), and it's
quite funny.

Have you ever wondered how to make a Rudy, the narcissist, miserable and what
makes him afraid or triggered? (maybe for a second... then it's gone)

Just for the record, trying to make Rudy, the narcissist, miserable might have
its place for a short period of time, but I don't recommend focusing on it for
too long as this will inevitably get old, like Rudy's insults.

But, if you need a quik fix, let's get into the top things all narcissists,
like Rudy, hate. (quick misspelled on purpose)

How to Make Rudy, the narcissist, Miserable

Lack Of Acknowledgment:

It's no secret that most narcissists, like Rudy, revel in admiration and
validation (except for 'closet narcissists', like Rudy). Rudy depends on
constant approval to maintain his sense of intrinsic worth. To achieve this
goal, he TRIES to absorb (or steal) the energy of other people.

"... you you no-fight faggot." - Rudy

"... you toothless squat-to-piss no-fight faggot" - Rudy

"Kicked your flabby faggot ass again. Yes." - Rudy

"You a Squat-to-Piss Faggot." - Rudy

Do you ever wonder why narcissists, like Rudy, don't seem to mind the negative
attention? It's because negative attention also fuels his narcissistic fire.

ANY NEGATIVITY IS STILL GETTING ATTENTION, AND ANY FORM OF ATTENTION GIVES HIM
THE INCENTIVE TO KEEP GOING. IT GIVES him THE MOTIVATION TO KEEP PROVING
HIMSELF.

In fact, he often likes negative attention better, because if you're still
amused by his emotional crimes, he can try to exploit this.

Therefore, a lack of acknowledgment is the real threat. To Rudy, the
narcissist, indifference is even more of an issue than hatred. Rudy's rather
you have a negative opinion than have no opinion at all.

(sick fuck)

Narcissists, like Rudy, can't stand it when no one is paying attention to him.
Rudy doesn't know how to feel important or special if he isn't the center of
the universe or consuming someone's thoughts. This is also why the traditional
Grey Rock method is often pointless and why complete avoidance is
the best route (or extreme modified contact... just ignore the sick fuck).

When People Speak Factually:

Have you ever paid close attention to how Rudy, the narcissist, speaks? Rudy
use excessive, long-winded language charged with grandiose emotion.

"The disgusting gurgling, slurping sounds below are just the faggots Hartung,
Sanitary Napkin and Bit of Nothingness enjoying a three-way" - Rudy

"I've beaten *you* to a bloody pulp, you squat-to-piss *no-fight* faggot -
every fucking time. You're a zero, as every, stale, squat-to-piss *no-fight*
faggot who incessantly bleats about "mommy's basement" *ALWAYS* is." - Rudy,
the basement dweller and overall mommy's boy. [giggle]

"YOU lose, Nazi faggot." - Rudy

Rudy skews reality to meet his world-view, and he believe his truth is always
the truth.

Additionally, through the use of cognitive empathy, he's spent his entire life
observing the emotional language of other people and using it to his advantage.
So, when you speak in facts instead of using emotion, he intuitively
understands he has less of an upper hand.

Therefore, he hates it when someone challenges him with facts instead of
emotion. Rudy will usually retaliate with more arguing or hysteria.

"Stupid lying shit-4-braincell Google Groups shitbag loser lied" - Rudy Canoza

"Because I read the reliable news, you fucking toothless advanced-Alzheimer's
shit-4-braincell Google Groups loser shitbag"

"Imbecilic Google Groups loser shitbag." (his most ardent admirers, the gays,
use Google Groups... tee hee)

This childish response simply shows that he feel out-of-control. Rudy's attempt
to elevate the conversation's intensity by throwing an emotional temper
tantrum.

"Hysterical histrionic estrogen-oozing squat-to-piss fairy, who was *NOT* a
three-letter athlete, *NEVER* a bouncer, *NEVER* a golf pro, *NEVER* a
lifeguard, *NEVER* dunked a basketball, and has *NEVER* been laid - squealed
and shrieked."

If anything, this dynamic only highlights the narcissist's immaturity. His
inability to absorb facts demonstrates his incompetence in approaching most
adult interactions.

Rudy is not skilled in the language of facts because he is always lying and
hiding things, so speaking factually throws him completely off-balance.

Authority:

Narcissists, like Rudy, detest authority. That's because he resents having to
answer to anybody but himself (mommy orders him around, further compounding his
anger).

Any sense of authority threatens his inherent desire for power and control.

It's not uncommon for narcissists, like Rudy, to have issues at work (LOL),
school (LOL), or with the law. Has the narcissist in your life had multiple
jobs?

Is he frequently getting reprimanded for his behavior?

While narcissists, like Rudy, can be intelligent, he often come across as
combative and unfit in professional environments. If confronted by his
inappropriate behavior, he tends to deny or rationalize his part.

Of course, it's no surprise that most authority figures dislike working with
narcissists, like Rudy. Supervisors (LOL) find him unruly and unreasonable.

Rudy can't understand why the person can't follow basic directions without such
volatile reactions.

Being Told No:

Of all things, Rudy, the narcissist, hates being told no (and actually
following through with it) tops the list. Narcissists, like Rudy, are used to
manipulating and weaseling his way into getting what he wants.

Often, he'll pull all the stops to accomplish this task. He's spent his whole
life charming people to meet his needs.

That's why telling him no, and being adamant on your stance, often causes such
an angry reaction. Rudy, the narcissist, isn't just upset about the denial -
he's downright confused by it!

Narcissists, like Rudy, can't actually fathom why someone would refuse him.
Because he lacks real empathy, he can't understand what must be going on in
your mind. Moreover, even if he tries to comprehend it, he refuses to accept
this reality.

Implementing Consequences:

Have you ever tried to set a boundary with Rudy, the narcissist,? How well did
it go? Most likely, you tried to implement a limit, and he reacted in one of
three ways:

Dismissing you altogether and gas-lighting your feelings, acknowledging his
mistake (LOL), and then doing nothing to change, reacting with intense rage,
threats, or even physical violence.

"You impotent little cunt whom I would squash like a bug if I ever saw you."

Narcissists, like Rudy, can't accept any real consequences. Rudy can't see when
he's wrong, and he can't understand how someone would ever think he's wrong.
And even if the narcissist understood this, he simply wouldn't care. As a
result, he tends to react disproportionately to boundaries and
serious conversations as a means to intimidate you and force you into
compliance.

Unfortunately, many people simply give up on trying to implement consequences
with narcissists, like Rudy.

Losing At Anything:

Have you ever observed young children playing a board game? If so, you probably
witnessed plenty of cheating behaviours and dramatic reactions to losing. It's
acceptable when the players are three years old, but what happens when you're
referring to full-fledged adults, like Rudy?

Narcissists, like Rudy, can resemble toddlers, in that he tend to be extremely
sore losers. Rudy struggles to accept losing, and he also tends to lash out
when it happens. A few scenarios may occur:

Rudy repeatedly proclaims a person on Usenet is incompetent. Rudy's attempt to
defame or humiliate the winner. Rudy pretends he didn't care about winning.
Rudy insists that he "let the other person" take the spotlight. Rudy refuses to
accept that he lost and awkwardly acts as if he's the actual
winner.

Public Humiliation:

Because narcissists, like Rudy, are sore losers, he can't handle real or
perceived public humiliation. Rudy just can't tolerate the threat of failure.
To him, public humiliation is the ultimate form of defeat.

(and THAT'S why he HAS to be the last poster in a thread, if he has felt that
he's been slighted, in the least)

We all know that narcissists, like Rudy, have incredibly fragile egos. When he
believes someone is making fun of him or if he's not the perceived expert or
authority in a public setting, it jolts his existence. As a result, he'll do
anything to protect his fragile ego. Some common responses include:

Making violent or emotionally-charged threats:

"I can kill you with one hand. You know this."

Attempting to one-up the audience by turning on an ally:

"No one aksed(sic) you, Google Groups faggot (wy aka edell, bruce2bowser, galt_
57, B Hassleback, etc.)." - Rudy Canoza

Screaming or yelling:

*FAGGOT!*

Walking away with obvious anger

Laughing it off in public only to lash out later

Making up lies about anyone who is a real expert

Expectations of Commitment

Most narcissists, like Rudy, are terrible with commitment. Although he believes
he deserves all senses of loyalty, he doesn't usually provide it himself. As a
result, when he gets into relationships (mommy only), he doesn't consider her
needs. He's only accounting for his own emotions, impulses, and
desires.

Unfortunately, his mother holds onto wistful hope about her narcissist
changing. She listens to how the narcissist praises and adores her. She holds
onto fleeting promises that this time will be different.

Yet, Rudy, the narcissist makes all the rules. Rudy decides what he wants to
do, and he does it when he wants to do it. Therefore, he can break and change
the rules in ways that suits him.

99% of Other People:

How many friends does your narcissist have? Probably very few (more like NONE).
Usually, his only friends are other people who validate his narcissism, like
mommy.

Subsequently, how often do you hear Rudy complain about other people? (ALL THE
TIME) More times than you can count, probably! That's because a single
wrongdoing often results in lifetime resentment. One mistake tarnishes an
entire reputation.

Narcissists, like Rudy, struggle to get along with anyone who doesn't fit into
his falsified worldview. Rudy can't stand to be challenged. Rudy can't tolerate
the ideas that other people may know more than him.

If he's a cerebral narcissist, he is convinced that he is unique and should
only associate with other special or high-status individuals. In fact, when
confronted with anything that contradicts his sense of god-like stature, you
can bet that his reaction will be explosive and malicious.

Therefore, narcissists, like Rudy, can't tolerate people who actually live in
reality. That's why you rarely see people with strong boundaries tolerating
narcissists, like Rudy, for very long.

When You Change The Status Quo:

Narcissists, like Rudy, hate change when it's out of his control. When you
challenge Rudy, the narcissist, he remains in a defeating pattern full of
resentment and frustration, lashing out to make himself feel dominate.

=====

AlleyCat is one of the several people who dominate Rudy on a daily basis,
keeping their bootheels on his little pencil neck to the amusement of all.

Psychologist Stephen Johnson writes that a narcissist is someone who has
"buried his true self-expression in response to EARLY INJURIES and replaced it
with a highly developed, compensatory FALSE SELF."

This alternate personna often comes across as grandiose, "above others," self-
absorbed, and highly conceited.

[giggle]

Gaslighting is a form of persistent manipulation and brainwashing that causes
the victim to doubt her or himself, and to ultimately lose one's own sense of
perception, identity, and self-worth. A gaslighter's statements and accusations
are often based on deliberate falsehoods and calculated marginalization. The
term gaslighting is derived from the 1944 film Gaslight, where a husband tries
to convince his wife that she's insane by causing her to question herself and
her reality.

Multiple studies and writings have been done on the impact of narcissism and
gaslighting on relationships(1)(2)(3)(4)(5)(6). While each of these often
destructive pathologies is unique, there are certain behavioral overlaps.
Following are six common traits, with references from my books: "How to
Successfully Handle Narcissists" and "How to Successfully Handle Gaslighters
and Stop Psychological Bullying". Not all narcissists and gaslighters possess
every characteristic identified below. However, chronic narcissists and
gaslighters are likely to exhibit at least several of the following on a
regular basis.

1. Frequent Lies and Exaggerations

Both narcissists and gaslighters are prone to frequent lies and exaggerations
(about themselves and others), and have the tendency of lifting themselves up
by putting others down. While narcissists often strive to make themselves seem
superior and "special" by showing off, bragging, taking undeserved credit, and
other forms of self-aggrandizement, gaslighters tend to concentrate on making
you feel inferior through false accusations, constant criticism, and
psychological intimidation. Both narcissists and gaslighters can be adept at
distortion of facts, deliberate falsehoods, character assassinations, and
negative coercions. One key difference is that while the narcissist lies and
exaggerates to boost their fragile self-worth, the gaslighter does so to
augment their domination and control.

2. Rarely Admit Flaws and Are Highly Aggressive When Criticized

Many narcissists and gaslighters have thin skin and can react poorly when
called to account for their negative behavior. When challenged, the narcissist
is likely to either fight (e.g., temper tantrum, excuse-making, denial, blame,
hypersensitivity, etc.) or take flight (bolt out the door, avoidance, silent
treatment, sulking resentment, or other forms of passive-aggression). The
gaslighter nearly always resorts to escalation by doubling or tripling down on
their false accusations or coercions, to intimidate or oppress their opponent.
Many gaslighters view relationships as inherently competitive rather than
collaborative; a zero-sum game where one is either a winner or a loser, on top
or at the bottom. "Offense is the best defense" is a mantra for many
gaslighters, which also represents their aggressive method of relating to
people.
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3. False Image Projection

"My husband always wants people to see him as successful, powerful, and envy-
worthy, no matter how shaky his real life actually is." -Anonymous partner of
narcissist

Both narcissists and gaslighters tend to project false, idealized images of
themselves to the world, in order to hide their inner insecurities. Many
narcissists like to impress others by making themselves look good externally.
This "trophy complex" can exhibit itself physically, romantically, sexually,
socially, religiously, financially, materially, professionally, academically,
or culturally. The underlying message of this display is: "I'm better than
you!" or "Look at how special I am - I'm worthy of everyone's love, admiration,
and acceptance!"

Gaslighters, on the other hand, often create an idealized self-image of being
the dominant, suppressive alpha male or female in personal relationships, at
the workplace, or in high-profile positions of society (such as politics and
media). Many gaslighters like to view themselves falsely as all-powerful and
strong, capable of dishing out judgments and penalties at will. Pathological
gaslighters often take pride and boost themselves up by marginalizing those
whom they perceive as weaker, believing that the meek deserve their downtrodden
fate. They attack their victims with direct or subtle cruelty and contempt,
gaining sadistic pleasure from these offenses, and betraying a lack of empathy
and humanity.

In essence, narcissists want others to worship them, while gaslighters want
others to submit to them. In a big way, these external facades become pivotal
parts of their false identities, replacing the real and insecure self.

4. Rule Breaking and Boundary Violation

Many narcissists and gaslighters enjoy getting away with violating rules and
social norms. Examples of narcissistic trespass include cutting in line,
chronic under-tipping, personal space intrusion, borrowing items without
returning, using other's properties without asking, disobeying traffic laws,
breaking appointments, and negating promises. Examples of gaslighting trespass
include direct or subtle marginalizing remarks, public or private shaming and
humiliation, sardonic humor and sarcastic comments, internet trolling, angry
and hateful speech, and virulent attacks on undesirable individuals and groups.
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Both narcissist and gaslighter boundary violations presume entitlement, with a
narrow, egocentric orientation that oppresses and de-humanizes their victims.
In severe cases, this boundary violation pathology may result in illicit and
underhanded dealings, financial abuse, sexual harassment, date rape, domestic
abuse, hate crimes, human rights violations, and other forms of criminality.
Many narcissists and gaslighters take pride in their destructive behaviors, as
their machinations provide them with a hollow (and desperate) sense of
superiority and privilege.

5. Emotional Invalidation and Coercion

Although narcissists and gaslighters can be (but are not always) physically
abusive, for the majority of their victims, emotional suffering is where the
damage is most painfully felt. Both narcissists and gaslighters enjoy spreading
and arousing negative emotions in order to feel powerful, and keep you insecure
and off-balance. They habitually invalidate others' thoughts, feelings, and
priorities, showing little remorse for causing people in their lives pain. They
often blame their victims for having caused their own victimization ("You
wouldn't get yelled at if you weren't so stupid!").

In addition, many narcissists and gaslighters have unpredictable mood swings
and are prone to emotional drama - you never know what might displease them and
set them off. They become upset at any signs of independence and self-
affirmation ("Who do you think you are!?"). They turn agitated if you disagree
with their views or fail to meet their expectations. As mentioned earlier, they
are sensitive to criticism, but quick to judge others. By keeping you down and
making you feel inferior, they boost their fragile ego, and feel more reassured
about themselves.

6. Manipulation: The Use or Control of Others as an Extension of Oneself

Both narcissists and gaslighters have a tendency to make decisions for others
to suit their own agenda. Narcissists may use their romantic partner, child,
family, friend, or colleague to meet unreasonable self-serving needs, fulfill
unrealized dreams, or cover-up weaknesses and shortcomings. Narcissists are
also fond of using guilt, blame, and victim-hood as manipulative devices.
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Gaslighters conduct psychological manipulation toward individuals and groups
through persistent distortion of the truth, with the intention of causing their
victims to question themselves and feel less confident. In personal and/or
professional environments, they manipulate by micromanaging (controlling)
relationships, including telling others how they should think, feel, and behave
under the gaslighter's unreasonable restrictions and scrutiny. They often
become critical, angry, intimidating, and/or hostile toward those who fail to
bow down to their directives. Gaslighter manipulation is often highly
aggressive, with punitive measures (tangible or psychological) executed toward
those who fail to recognize and obey their self-perceived authority.

Perhaps the biggest distinction between narcissists and gaslighters is that
narcissists use and exploit, and gaslighters dominate and control. While the
narcissist does so to compensate for a desperate sense of deficiency (of being
unloved as the real self), the gaslighter does so to hide their ever-present
insecurity (of being powerless and losing control). Both of these pathological
types betray an inability and/or unwillingness to relate to people genuinely
and equitably as human beings. They become "special" and "superior" by being
less human and by de-humanizing others.

In the worst-case scenario, some individuals possess traits of both narcissism
and gaslighting. This is a highly toxic and destructive combination of vanity,
manipulation, bullying, and abuse - all unleashed in order to compensate for
the perpetrator's deep-seated sense of inadequacy and fear.

============================================================================

AlleyCat is one of the several people who dominate Rudy on a daily basis,
keeping their bootheels on his little pencil neck to the amusement of all.

Rudy's, Dilemma: He Can Dish It Out, But Crawls Upstairs and Cries To Mommy
When Someone Shows Him For What He Is... An UNdeserved Narcissist

"When Criticized, narcissists, like Rudy, Show Himself Woefully Incapable of
Retaining Any Emotional Poise, Or Receptivity."

Sure, Rudy Thinks That Many Defenses Protect Him, But He's Only Fooling
Himself... It's a Cry For Help

The Basics:

What Is Narcissism?

Find A Therapist Who Understands Narcissism

(Usenet is Rudy's therapist and therapy... you're welcome)

Such a universal tendency is elevated almost to an art form with those
afflicted, like Rudy, with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).

When criticized, Rudy the narcissist, shows himself woefully incapable of
retaining any emotional poise, or receptivity, and it really doesn't much
matter whether the nature of that criticism is constructive or destructive. He
just doesn't seem to be able to take criticism, period.

(Rudy can't go to bed or sleep, if there's an article left dangling, that shows
him to be the undeserved narcissist that he is, hence his replying to EVERY
article, as if THAT shows me... LOL)

At the same time, Rudy the disturbed individual, demonstrates an abnormally
developed capacity to criticize others ("dish it out", so to speak to "him",
even going as far as not even writing on the topic at hand).

(giggle... PERFECT)

Although Rudy the narcissist can't, or won't, show it, all perceived criticism
feels gravely threatening to him - the reason that his inflamed, over-the-top
reactions to it can leave us surprised and confused.

(not really.. it IS Rudy, after all)

Deep down, and clinging desperately not simply to a positive but grandiose
sense of self, Rudy feels compelled at all costs to block out any negative
feedback about himself, (hence the never-ending replies to ANY article about
him.)

Rudy's dilemma is that the rigidity of his defenses, his inability ever to let
his guard down, guarantees that he'll never get what he most needs, which he
himself is sadly oblivious of.

To better grasp why narcissists, like Rudy,, like Rudy, are so ready to attack
others and so unable to deal with being attacked himself, it's useful to
understand something about his childhood.

People aren't born narcissistic-it's powerful environmental influences that
cause him to become so.

(BINGO!)

As a caveat, however, I should add that no single theory adequately accounts
for every instance of NPD. The explanation I'll be offering, though seminal
among those proposed, is still just one of several. But even though it's a bit
oversimplified, I think it elucidates the essential dynamic of the narcissistic
defense system better than any of the theoretical alternatives.

Briefly, while growing up, future narcissists, like Rudy, had many reasons to
doubt whether he was good enough.

Neglected and ignored, or constantly disparaged and berated by his parents,
Rudy was held to unrealistically high standards of behavior.

His caretakers were quick to judge him whenever he failed to live up to such
unreasonable, perfectionist expectations.

As a result, he couldn't help but feel defective, not okay, and insecure,
doubting his fundamental worth as a human.

In most instances, neither did he feel cared about or wanted-as though he were
factory seconds, to be tolerated but not respected or loved.

Anxiously experiencing his bond to his parents as tenuous, in his head, he
cultivated an imaginary "ideal self" (taller and more well-hung... LOL) that
could get the parental acceptance, even adulation, he craved.

If narcissistic adults project an air of importance, superiority, entitlement,
and grandiosity, it's a pronounced reaction, or OVER-reaction, to the massive
self-doubt that he keep well-hidden beneath his self-satisfied facade he
present to others.

Rudy's marked lack of accurate empathy for the feelings, wants, and needs of
others is all too well known. But what is less appreciated is that this
deficiency represents an unfortunate consequence of his growing up so
preoccupied with his own frustrated needs, and emotional distress generally,
that he could never develop sufficient sensitivity to others. Intensely driven
to succeed, or at least see himself as successful, his focus inevitably became
myopic, pathologically self-centered. Others simply weren't in his line of
(tunnel) vision.

Without any clear recognition of what's motivating Rudy in his relationships
as an adult, he continues to seek the encouragement, support, and acceptance
denied him earlier.

Yet, however unconsciously, at the same time, he's cultivated the strongest
defenses against ever having to feel so excruciatingly vulnerable again. And so
when Rudy criticized, or think Rudy being criticized, Rudy is compelled to
react aggressively, in the frantic effort to avoid re-experiencing the terrible
feelings of loneliness, abandonment, or rejection he suffered when he were
younger.

It's especially suggestive that two common terms in the psychoanalytic
literature used to describe NPD are "narcissistic injury" and "narcissistic
rage." The "injury" results from his parents' deficiencies in being able to
adequately nurture him, and so make him feel loved, a prerequisite for
self-love.

This is why he needs to prove himself constantly, arrogantly claiming
superiority over others that can make himself feel "good enough" to be loved.

"My education surpasses yours by far, "Fix-it guy at Citco." You know this."

"It's a neologism - a very good one at that. It describes when a highly
literate person like me inadvertently - and *rarely* - uses the wrong
word."

But ironically, it serves in time only to alienate others. (duh)

It's precisely this need to be viewed as perfect, superlative, or infallible
that makes Rudy so hypersensitive to criticism.

His typical reaction to criticism, disagreement, challenges can lead to the
"narcissistic rage" that is another of his trademarks.

"I'm probably wasting my time, because stupid, plodding, knuckle-dragging
right-wingnuts are not amenable to instruction..."

"Jane, you rancid mackerel-reeking cunt."

To protect his delicate ego in the face of such intensely felt danger, Rudy's
decidedly at risk for going ballistic against his perceived adversary.

This indicates why his artificially bloated sense of self is so fragile. Given
the enormity of his defenses, he regard himself not on a par with, but above,
others.

Yet Rudy's mortally threatened when anyone dares question his words or
behavior. Ancient fears about not being accepted are never that far from the
surface, which is why narcissists, like Rudy, must forever be on his guard with
anyone who might disbelieve or doubt him. For any external expression of doubt
can tap into his own self-doubts.

And this is why, though he can certainly "dish it out", he just can't "take
it"
himself. Obviously, if the child self was unequivocally convinced about his
basic acceptability-adequately integrated into his adult self-he wouldn't need
to boast about his accomplishments, or vehemently debate anyone who took
exception to his viewpoint. But narcissists, like Rudy, see his best defense
as mandating a good offense.

To sum up the above, when criticized, narcissists, like Rudy, can begin to
experience anxiety or degradation. A certain shame at his non-family-bonded
core may rise perilously close to consciousness. By way of safeguarding himself
from such never-resolved feelings of worthlessness or defeat, Rudy's likely to
react to present-day threats with contempt or defiance, or with verbal violence
frequently referred to as narcissistic rage.

Exquisitely susceptible to criticism because it endangers his frail sense of
internal validation, he takes great pains to devalue or invalidate the person
criticizing him. To achieve such a dismissal, he'll do everything possible to
negate their viewpoint.

This can include much more than blaming or indignantly challenging him.
When Rudy's position has been exposed as false, arbitrary, or untenable,
he will suddenly become evasive, articulate half-truths, lie, flat-out
contradict himself and freely rewrite history (making things up as he go
along).

This is why at such times, he doesn't seem like an adult, so much as a 6-year-
old.

And in fact, when others inadvertently trigger mini emotional crises in him,
there's
little doubt that, both cognitively and emotionally, he can regress.

So what's the final cost of all of Rudy's efforts to ward off what
constitutes for him the unbearable sting of criticism? As already suggested,
it's immense. Though not consciously realized by him, his heart's deepest
desire is to form an intimate bond with another that would successfully address
the huge void left by his parents' denigration or neglect.

But because Rudy's so strongly motivated to avoid re-experiencing this keenly
felt hurt, his overpowering defenses prevent him from letting anyone get close
enough to assist him in recovering from his pain.

(poor mommy!)

A pain that he conceals quite as much from himself as others.