I am so ashamed
Këiö
> My name is Tom,
>
Hello, Tom. The first thing you need to do is take a deep breath and
relax. Your post is very confusing, but I can understand that you are
under a great deal of stress. So calm yourself. As long as there is life,
there is hope.
>
> and my dad delivers pizza's for a living. he's retired,
>
First you say he's making a living, but then you say he's retired. Maybe
you meant his POSmobile has been re-treaded? Or maybe you meant he earns
tips by delivering pizzas to THE living, as opposed to delivering pizzas to
the dead, who are notorious for being stiffers, what with the rigor mortis
and all.
>
> and runs around the city with a old car delivering pizza all
> night.
>
When you say *runs* around the city with an old car, is he carrying a Hot
Wheels in his shirt pocket? Or is he actually driving his POSmobile à la
Fred Flintstone, sticking his legs through the gaping holes in the rusted
out floorboards, so he can save his Sunoco Gold for the bong where it
belongs instead of wasting it in the gas tank.
>
> The car smells horrid,
>
One word: otorhinolaryngologist.
Or cottage cheese.
Depends upon what Fred's been up to.
>
> his friends from work are all idiots,
>
Now, Tom. I can assure you that this isn't the case, so put your fears
aside. It's a well known fact that pizzaboys don't *have* friends. So
ease your furrowed brow and throw away the notion that your father has
idiots for friends, and take comfort in the realization that your father is
simply conjuring fanciful tales of co-worker comraderie in an effort to
hide his shame. There, now, doesn't that feel better?
>
> and he brings home pizza everynight.
>
May I suggest mixing it with Tequila...and setting the blender on my
personal favorite--"liquefy". Ta dah! TequizZa!
(when you begin to pronounce it "li QUEFF' ee", you've had enough
Tequila--now it's time to start on the Creme de Menthe)
>
>
> Please help
>
We here at apdd will try our best. You've come to the right place.
Now, if you'll excuse me a moment...
<bzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZ>
Mmmmm, liQUEFFee....