Random Peeve
cs22...@husky1.stmarys.ca
something, or get embroiled in something. On soc.college it was fraternities.On
alt.tv.twin-peaks, it was wherethe location of the biggest non nuclear
explosion was. I won't tell you what happens when I post to alt.tasteless ;-)
Peeve # Deux : My editor. As I type this, letters are jumping into the text at
random. This means I am guessing at what the spelling and typing looks like, so
my Learned Dissertations (a la Drieux) look like they were typed by a five year
old chimp in the middle of an earthquake ;-)
Peeve numero Trios
The system is slooowwwwww. I type a sentence, then wait a minute for it to
appear.
Later
Mike
Curtis Yarvin
>
>Peeve the First: No matter what newsgroup I post to, I manage to start
>something, or get embroiled in something. On soc.college it was
>fraternities.On alt.tv.twin-peaks, it was wherethe location of the biggest
>non nuclear explosion was. I won't tell you what happens when I post to
>alt.tasteless ;-)
Congratulations! You have reached the first stage of rational thought:
Noticing that something is going on.
This is a huge step. As Woody Allen said, "Ninety percent of life
is just showing up." Perhaps, in time, you will achieve the second
stage:
Making correlations.
But when you realize that the water turning yellow has something to
do with the warm limp feeling in your dick, your ass will be long
gone from here. It hurts me to have to tell you, Mike, but all
those other groups didn't kick you out just 'cause they're mean and
nasty and they can't appreciate intelligent & sensitive folks like
you. No, Mikey my boy, they showed you the door because, deep down,
at a level (alas) beyond the curative powers of medical science, you
just ain't a very interesting fellow.
We're slow to anger, Mike-o, but we play rough. Soc.college might
have given you a quick pat on the rump; if we have to chastise you,
you'll be picking bits of leather out of your ass for the next year.
So pipe down and leave quietly, would you?
c
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Jul30...@husky1.stmarys.ca> cs22...@husky1.stmarys.ca writes:
>>
>>Peeve the First: No matter what newsgroup I post to, I manage to start
>>something, or get embroiled in something. On soc.college it was
>>fraternities.On alt.tv.twin-peaks, it was wherethe location of the biggest
>>non nuclear explosion was. I won't tell you what happens when I post to
>>alt.tasteless ;-)
>
> Congratulations! You have reached the first stage of rational thought:
>
> Noticing that something is going on.
>
> This is a huge step. As Woody Allen said, "Ninety percent of life
> is just showing up." Perhaps, in time, you will achieve the second
> stage:
>
> Making correlations.
>
> But when you realize that the water turning yellow has something to
> do with the warm limp feeling in your dick, your ass will be long
> gone from here. It hurts me to have to tell you, Mike, but all
> those other groups didn't kick you out just 'cause they're mean and
> nasty and they can't appreciate intelligent & sensitive folks like
> you. No, Mikey my boy, they showed you the door because, deep down,
> at a level (alas) beyond the curative powers of medical science, you
> just ain't a very interesting fellow.
>
Actually, Curtis, you chromosomal abberation with USENET access, those other
arguments were more like debates. And if I'm not that interesting, why are
you responding to my article. And they didn't kick me out; I am still
reading and posting to both. Do try to stop jumping to silly conclusions,
will you? Or is that all you are capable of?
> We're slow to anger, Mike-o, but we play rough. Soc.college might
> have given you a quick pat on the rump; if we have to chastise you,
> you'll be picking bits of leather out of your ass for the next year.
>
Sorry pal, but I'm here for the next little while. So why don't you
just pick up your leftist toys and go play somewhere else, hmm...?
Later
Mike
s...@gnv.ifas.ufl.edu
[cogent rebuttal of one Mr. Yarvin in response to a flame-bait
newbie post, deleted]
Caaaaareful mikey. Didn't your mommy ever tell you what happens
to BAAAAAAAAD wittle boys when they play with matches?
You, son, are messing with a contently sleeping pit bull with
a dull pencil nub. My apologies for parsing that metaphor but
we all know what I am trying to say. You will soon be dragging
your entrails out your anus as you make a pathetic crawl to the
virtual exit.
You have been warned.
SACHASSE
Allan Evans
> yar...@highlite.uucp (Curtis Yarvin) congratulates:
> > cs22...@husky1.stmarys.ca notices that something is going on
> >
> > Congratulations! You have reached the first stage of rational thought:
> > Noticing that something is going on.
> >
> > This is a huge step. As Woody Allen said, "Ninety percent of life
> > is just showing up." Perhaps, in time, you will achieve the second
> > stage: Making correlations.
> >
> > Translation for Canadians: "Thats YELLOW snow thar, BOY!"
>
> Actually, Curtis, you chromosomal abberation with USENET access, those other
> arguments were more like debates. And if I'm not that interesting, why are
> you responding to my article. And they didn't kick me out; I am still
> reading and posting to both. Do try to stop jumping to silly conclusions,
> will you? Or is that all you are capable of?
One thing that I have noticed is that many Canadians that post to this
group tend to start out with a very self-congratulatory, know-it-all
attitude. Mike, there are some things that you must learn:
1) Quit taking yourself so Fucking seriously. No one else does.
2) Don't eat yellow snow.
3) You may be reading and posting, but I have known people that eat, breathe
and shit (the equivalent biological processes) but that doesn't mean
Jack Shit in the real world (let alone the NetWorld). (Note the Woody
Allen reference).
4) Debates do not belong in alt.peeves. A debate implies reasoned, thoughtful
discourse, none of which belong in alt.peeves. Take your debate to
alt.pud.pulling.wanking.hamsters
5) Fuck Off.
> > We're slow to anger, Mike-o, but we play rough. Soc.college might
> > have given you a quick pat on the rump; if we have to chastise you,
> > you'll be picking bits of leather out of your ass for the next year.
Curtis... don't forget the steel slivers from the chains...
> Sorry pal, but I'm here for the next little while. So why don't you
> just pick up your leftist toys and go play somewhere else, hmm...?
Isn't calling someone a "Leftist" (as if it were somehow derogatory)
somewhat dated? C'mon Mike, you can do better. Stop PudWanking, grab
your balls, and THROW something truely imaginative, insulting, and
totally irrelevent out into the forum. You will be a better Man for it.
Al
a Canadian in Oz
_______________________________________________________________________________
| Yes, I know my return address is messed up. Petition my sysadmin.......... |
| Allan H. Evans * School of Geography * UNSW * PO Box 1 Kensington 2033 Aust.|
| all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU Remote Sensing and Spatial Information Systems |
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> [flame-bait newbie post, deleted]
>
> [cogent rebuttal of one Mr. Yarvin in response to a flame-bait
> newbie post, deleted]
>
> Caaaaareful mikey. Didn't your mommy ever tell you what happens
> to BAAAAAAAAD wittle boys when they play with matches?
>
She did, then I had her killed. If Curtis is bad, then I'm worse. You're
right. I was a Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddddddd little boy. I am now a *woooorse*
man. It runs in the family. My aunt was once told by a menber of Anthrax
(she was attending a party they also were attending) that she had attitude,
and I take after her.
> You, son, are messing with a contently sleeping pit bull with
> a dull pencil nub. My apologies for parsing that metaphor but
> we all know what I am trying to say. You will soon be dragging
> your entrails out your anus as you make a pathetic crawl to the
> virtual exit.
>
Well, I've yet to see anything terribly original from Monseiur Yarvin.
If the worst he can come up with is "Frat boy" then I'm reasonably certain
I can withstand the (blunt) edge of his (half) wit.
> You have been warned.
>
Thanks, I'll keep it in mind.
Mike (pokepokeprodprodbootbootboot)
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> 01s...@ac.dal.ca (Mike the Man from Dalhousie) writes:
>> yar...@highlite.uucp (Curtis Yarvin) congratulates:
>> > cs22...@husky1.stmarys.ca notices that something is going on
>> >
>> > Congratulations! You have reached the first stage of rational thought:
>> > Noticing that something is going on.
>> >
>> > This is a huge step. As Woody Allen said, "Ninety percent of life
>> > is just showing up." Perhaps, in time, you will achieve the second
>> > stage: Making correlations.
>> >
>> > [CY points out that Mike was pissing his pants]
>> > Translation for Canadians: "Thats YELLOW snow thar, BOY!"
>>
>> Actually, Curtis, you chromosomal abberation with USENET access, those other
>> arguments were more like debates. And if I'm not that interesting, why are
>> you responding to my article. And they didn't kick me out; I am still
>> reading and posting to both. Do try to stop jumping to silly conclusions,
>> will you? Or is that all you are capable of?
>
> One thing that I have noticed is that many Canadians that post to this
> group tend to start out with a very self-congratulatory, know-it-all
> attitude. Mike, there are some things that you must learn:
>
That's because ( as you must know, if you are Canadian) that's how we are in
real life.
> 1) Quit taking yourself so Fucking seriously. No one else does.
>
Geez. I didn't think *anyone was taking this seriously. I thought the whole
thing was a flamefest. Silly me. Rest assured I don't take anything I read
here (or elswhere on the net) seriously.
> 2) Don't eat yellow snow.
Thanks, but it's August. Contrary to popular opinion, it dosen't snow in Nova
Scotia in August. Of course if I did eat yellow snow, I think I'd win Mr. Alt.
Tasteless 1993. I can hear the chant now: GIF GIF GIF GIF. But I digress.
>
> 3) You may be reading and posting, but I have known people that eat, breathe
> and shit (the equivalent biological processes) but that doesn't mean
> Jack Shit in the real world (let alone the NetWorld). (Note the Woody
> Allen reference).
What
>
> 4) Debates do not belong in alt.peeves. A debate implies reasoned, thoughtful
> discourse, none of which belong in alt.peeves. Take your debate to
> alt.pud.pulling.wanking.hamsters
>
Ah. gotcha.
> 5) Fuck Off.
>
Well in the spirit of that last comment:
EAT SHIT YOU BRAIN DEAD, HALF SQUICKED, SHEEP FUCKING PIECE OF TOEJAM!
If I wanted any comeback form you I'd scrape the back of your throat (tm).
Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick, the day I listen to some sheepshit sniffing,
clapheaded, pussywhipped piece of shit whose mother is also his aunt, sister,
cousin, wife *and* *daughter* is the day you, Al, get laid by something other
than children, small fuzzy animals,very old nuns, or common household
appliances. Now go back to fucking your great grandmother's clostomy bag.
Otherwise I might get upset.
Howzzat.
>> > We're slow to anger, Mike-o, but we play rough. Soc.college might
>> > have given you a quick pat on the rump; if we have to chastise you,
>> > you'll be picking bits of leather out of your ass for the next year.
>
> Curtis... don't forget the steel slivers from the chains...
>
Or your six inch stilleto heels, or those patent leather chaps. Whoops.
Wasn't supposed to mention that...
>> Sorry pal, but I'm here for the next little while. So why don't you
>> just pick up your leftist toys and go play somewhere else, hmm...?
>
> Isn't calling someone a "Leftist" (as if it were somehow derogatory)
> somewhat dated? C'mon Mike, you can do better. Stop PudWanking, grab
> your balls, and THROW something truely imaginative, insulting, and
> totally irrelevent out into the forum. You will be a better Man for it.
>
Well, since I got called a "facist" I think I'm even. PUDWANKING? ME?
Hey look pal, I've got a body over which even *men* get wet. Of
course considering that incident with you, Curtis, the tramploine, the three
midgets, and the tapir, I wouldn't be surprised if your tastes *do* deviate a
bit from heterosexual, or even homo sapien.
Well, you *did* tell me to pitch some of this stuff in here.
Mike, the Man From Dalhousie
(tm - alt.tasteless)
This just in:
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Peeve:
I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Finally!
Money!
Power!
NO MORE ROOMATES!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
No more school!
No more debt!
*sigh*
and the best part:
I still keep my usenet access!
A HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA!!!!!!
Gawd I'm in a good mood. Well, this shoots any further falmes I was going to
post straight to hell, I'm felling too good.
M.
Nosy
[tedious, derivative text deleted]
< !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Peeve:
< I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
< Finally!
< Money!
< Power!
< NO MORE ROOMATES!
< HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
< No more school!
< No more debt!
< *sigh*
< and the best part:
< I still keep my usenet access!
Uh, sorry to rain on the old victory parade, but
"job interview" does not equal "job", speaking
from personal experience.
Oh, and "booby hatch" is somewhat older synonym
for "loony bin"......
ObPeeve: 01sybok is just too, too similar to the logon
of a rather, er, energetic poster from MIT.
It's disconcerting to think that there could
be virtual copies posting around.
Curtis Yarvin
>>
>> It hurts me to have to tell you, Mike, but all
>> those other groups didn't kick you out just 'cause they're mean and
>> nasty and they can't appreciate intelligent & sensitive folks like
>> you. No, Mikey my boy, they showed you the door because, deep down,
>> at a level (alas) beyond the curative powers of medical science, you
>> just ain't a very interesting fellow.
>
>Actually, Curtis, you chromosomal abberation with USENET access, those other
>arguments were more like debates. And if I'm not that interesting, why are
>you responding to my article.
Because Steve's gone and my conscience just deputized me Acting
Immigration Officer, and since I guess I have to spell it out more
clearly your application has just been stamped >>DENIED<<.
You don't seem entirely devoid of intelligence, though, so it might be
worth explaining what I mean by "interesting," and why you aren't it.
Obviously, some poor fool having given you a computer and told you how
to work it, you've been traipsing through alt.this and soc.that,
looking for a nice rowdy place like the basement of your frathouse the
morning after a hard night with the Milwaukee Beast, or whatever vile
piss you think of as beer. Coming upon alt.peeves at a slack point,
you got the impression that it was exactly the sort of place you were
looking for.
A place where you could misspell every third word; where you could
mutilate grammar and piss upon punctuation; where you could drop line
feeds and hide them in corners to be gnawed on by the cat, and
_nobody would notice_.
Well, in fact, Peevetown _is_ a place like that. It's just a
coincidence that every regular poster to this group has perfect
grammar and spelling. Such are, after all, the table manners of
conversation; any civilized person has them, but even barbarians
can be interesting at dinner.
You, however, are not. This judgment might puzzle you; I'm sure
you're the wittiest boy in your frat and make a big hit at toga
parties. But alt.peeves is a higher league. To play ball in these
parts, you've got to have the tools of the trade:
1) Refined prose.
2) Character and style.
3) Humor and wit.
With two of three you might make it; with NONE, you just ain't
ready for the pros.
But don't get yourself down. These qualities, or lack thereof, aren't
etched in your genes. They're skills that can be developed with
practice and time. My advice to you, Mike: forget about Usenet for a
few years, and go live a full and varied life. Join the Peace Corps.
Run away to Afghanistan and link up with the Muja-Haddeen. Sell drugs
in the tough back alleys of Edmonton. Learn to ride and apply for a
job with the RCMP. Become a wealthy and corrupt options trader on the
Toronto commodity exchanges; make ten million and lose it all in a day.
Write the Great American Novel, and fail to sell it. Start a Glenn
Miller cover band, buy a suit of red velvet, and spend the next three
years playing lounges. In short: live a little, it'll make you
interesting.
Growing up an Albertan farmboy and matriculating to frathood at St.
Mary's University won't, and hasn't. Unfair it may be; but there's
no use crying over spilt milk.
>Sorry pal, but I'm here for the next little while.
And that, of course, you may be. Usenet has no mechanism for
censorship. We can waste our breath humiliating you, but we
can't forcibly kick you out. Eventually we end up doing what
most groups do in this situation: just ignoring you. Most
people are smart enough to take the hint.
Perhaps I've made a mistake; perhaps someone on this network really
did appreciate your posts. I'm new to this job, and I'd like some
feedback. Does anyone want to speak up for this wretch, or shall we
throw him to the dogs?
c
Allan Evans
> In article all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan Evans) writes:
> > [Canadians taking themselves too seriously...]
> That's because ( as you must know, if you are Canadian) that's how we are in
> real life.
>
> > 1) Quit taking yourself so Fucking seriously. No one else does.
> >
> Geez. I didn't think *anyone was taking this seriously. I thought the whole
> thing was a flamefest. Silly me. Rest assured I don't take anything I read
> here (or elswhere on the net) seriously.
That's a start.
> > 2) Don't eat yellow snow.
> Thanks, but it's August. Contrary to popular opinion, it dosen't snow in Nova
> Scotia in August. Of course if I did eat yellow snow, I think I'd win Mr. Alt.
> Tasteless 1993. I can hear the chant now: GIF GIF GIF GIF. But I digress.
Come now, everyone knows that once you cross the 49th going north everything
immediately turns to ice. My trusty snowmobile is always parked out beside
the igloo back home in Calgary.
> > 3) You may be reading and posting, but I have known people that eat, breathe
> > and shit (the equivalent biological processes) but that doesn't mean
> > Jack Shit in the real world (let alone the NetWorld). (Note the Woody
> > Allen reference).
>
> What <---- Is this a question? (punctuation s.v.p.)
Assuming that it is... you remarked that you were still reading and posting.
Although I gathered the latter myself, the former was not entirely obvious. As
stated, I have known individuals that perform the equivalent biological
processes, however even though they appear to be alive it is not certain that
they are concious - ie: they just "show up".
> > 4) Debates do not belong in alt.peeves. A debate implies reasoned, thoughtful
> > discourse, none of which belong in alt.peeves. Take your debate to
> > alt.pud.pulling.wanking.hamsters
>
> Ah. gotcha.
Good.
> > 5) Fuck Off.
> Well in the spirit of that last comment:
>
> EAT SHIT YOU BRAIN DEAD, HALF SQUICKED, SHEEP FUCKING PIECE OF TOEJAM!
Well, the eating shit part might be appropriate in a.t, but not neccesarily
in a.p. Half squicked? My Oxford English Dictionary is not by my side, but
I was not aware I had a "squick". As for the sheep, well, I AM in Australia,
however the New Zealanders tend to be more orientated in that direction.
> If I wanted any comeback form you I'd scrape the back of your throat (tm).
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
No comback forms here. I must refer you again to alt.pud.pulling.wanking.
hamsters.
> Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick, the day I listen to some sheepshit sniffing,
> clapheaded, pussywhipped piece of shit whose mother is also his aunt, sister,
> cousin, wife *and* *daughter* is the day you, Al,
I realize that you haven't been too far from home dear Mike, but the rest of
Canada does not have the same breeding habits as your Homeboys. As a matter
of fact, except for the odd incident with Sheep and/or Sheepdogs, most of
the rest of the world *AVOIDS* dicking their relatives.
Sheepshit sniffing: ten billion flies can't be wrong.
Clapheaded: MY head does not have the clap. I realize that your mother may
have passed the clap on to YOU, but that is YOUR problem.
Pussywhipped: That is MINK CHAIN-whipped to you, boy.
> get laid by something other
> than children, small fuzzy animals,very old nuns, or common household
> appliances.
children: Old enough to bleed, old enough to breed. As long as they aren't
a cousin... unlike in Nova Scotia, I am not into cousins.
small fuzzy animals: see alt.hamsters.duct.tape
very old nuns: Don't be knockin a good virgin.
common household appliances: I wondered what happened to my mixmaster.
> Now go back to fucking your great grandmother's clostomy bag.
> Otherwise I might get upset.
My great grandmother didn't need to be fucked in the
clostomy bag... my grandaddy used her cunt.
> Howzzat.
Needs work. Leave out the allusions to down-home sexual practices next
time. They may not be understood outside of Nova Scotia. Although the
priests in Newfoundland may be interested...
> > Curtis... don't forget the steel slivers from the chains...
>
> Or your six inch stilleto heels, or those patent leather chaps. Whoops.
> Wasn't supposed to mention that...
Now yer talkin.
> >> just pick up your leftist toys and go play somewhere else, hmm...?
> >
> > Isn't calling someone a "Leftist" (as if it were somehow derogatory)
> > somewhat dated?
>
> Well, since I got called a "facist" I think I'm even. PUDWANKING? ME?
> Hey look pal, I've got a body over which even *men* get wet.
Count me out.
> Of course considering that incident with you, Curtis, the tramploine, the three
> midgets, and the tapir, I wouldn't be surprised if your tastes *do* deviate a
> bit from heterosexual, or even homo sapien.
Homo sapiens -- yes (recall this IS Australia...) but I don't stray from
Heterosexuality I'm afraid.
> !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Peeve:
> I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
> Finally!
> Money!
> Power!
> NO MORE ROOMATES!
> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
> No more school!
> No more debt!
> *sigh*
> and the best part:
> I still keep my usenet access!
> A HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA!!!!!!
> Gawd I'm in a good mood. Well, this shoots any further falmes I was going to
> post straight to hell, I'm felling too good.
> M.
Since when has a job (providing you get it) ever ended powerlessness and poverty?
I solved the problem by remaining perpetually in school; with USENET access.
Hey peevers... anyone care to remind our dear friend Mike about the real world?
Can YOU say D.E.B.T?
Al
242 lbs before cooking
>> group tend to start out with a very self-congratulatory, know-it-all
>
>real life.
Jeez. Are you going to wear that red ball nose and those floppy
shoes for any length of time? Or are you just in the habit of
squeezing the bulb on your horn when someone calls you proud without
cause and shallow?
You're a pretty pathetic clown. Have you ever thought of taking up
miming?
>Geez. I didn't think *anyone was taking this seriously. I thought the whole
>thing was a flamefest. Silly me. Rest assured I don't take anything I read
>here (or elswhere on the net) seriously.
The "whole thing" is not a flamefest. Remember the fate of Migs in
Silence of the Lambs? That's what happens when someone gets flamed
here. So far, your little plastic, injection-molded self has been
toyed with in a simple, but often effective method of
demonstrating you're way out of your league. It's as if you were on
the deck of an aircraft carrier, folding paper airplanes, and
figuring that you fit right in.
>Scotia in August. Of course if I did eat yellow snow, I think I'd win Mr. Alt.
>Tasteless 1993. I can hear the chant now: GIF GIF GIF GIF. But I digress.
That's pretty unlikely. I doubt you could articulate the event to
the point the readership could understand what you did.
>What
That about sums it up.
>> 5) Fuck Off.
>Well in the spirit of that last comment:
>EAT SHIT YOU BRAIN DEAD, HALF SQUICKED, SHEEP FUCKING PIECE OF TOEJAM!
>If I wanted any comeback form you I'd scrape the back of your throat (tm).
>Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick, the day I listen to some sheepshit sniffing,
>clapheaded, pussywhipped piece of shit whose mother is also his aunt, sister,
>cousin, wife *and* *daughter* is the day you, Al, get laid by something other
>than children, small fuzzy animals,very old nuns, or common household
>appliances. Now go back to fucking your great grandmother's clostomy bag.
>Otherwise I might get upset.
>Howzzat.
If this was supposed to be a question, pretty poor. I have to admit
I haven't heard "toejam" used recently and it was probably time to
be recycled.
Other than that, it just really did nothing for me. No images
really came to mind until about the third line, when I envisioned
you as a chattering monkey.
On the other hand, if I made references to alcohol-induced
vomiting, date rape, group masturbation, academic probation, or
senseless class discrimination in conjuntion with you, I have little
doubt that most peevers could immediately envision you, in the act.
You're just that kind of guy.
Fuck off.
(See? Concise, understandable, and effective.)
>Well, since I got called a "facist" I think I'm even. PUDWANKING? ME?
>Hey look pal, I've got a body over which even *men* get wet. Of
Oops. A little semantic slip, Mikey. I think you meant to say
"I've got a body over which even men wet." Unless, of course, you
meant the back of their throats got wet with bile, in which case I
stand corrected.
>course considering that incident with you, Curtis, the tramploine, the three
>midgets, and the tapir, I wouldn't be surprised if your tastes *do* deviate a
>bit from heterosexual, or even homo sapien.
Why doesn't it surprise me that you consider fag allegations
insulting.
Next time you're two-fingering the nub, I'll bet you think of Mel
Gibson. Really. Mel Gibson.
Not because you want to, but because I've planted the idea in your
head. Jerk away.
>!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Peeve:
>I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Anyone this excited about an interview is clearly unemployable. I
would make a comment about counting your chicken before they hatch,
but this would require the ability to count.
>Finally!
>Money!
>Power!
Gee, you really are naive.
>Gawd I'm in a good mood. Well, this shoots any further falmes I was going to
>post straight to hell, I'm felling too good.
falmes? You're "felling" too good? Are you going to demonstrate
you're illiterate in your interview?
andy
ba...@abingdon.sun.com
--
I suppose that if I were a baseball fan I'd get equally peeved at
"RBIs," but the only stick-and-ball-type sport I watch much of is
women's beach volleyball with the sound turned off.
-- Scott Fisher
242 lbs before cooking
>> EAT SHIT YOU BRAIN DEAD, HALF SQUICKED, SHEEP FUCKING PIECE OF TOEJAM!
>
>Well, the eating shit part might be appropriate in a.t, but not neccesarily
>in a.p. Half squicked? My Oxford English Dictionary is not by my side, but
>I was not aware I had a "squick".
In an effort to squelch the disinformation Mikey will provide you,
"squick," in the SF Bay Area alternative sex scene, refers to an
act, usually sexual, which the speaker finds distasteful. "Yeah.
Tom and Ned threw a party last Friday, but they started squicking
around midnight so I left."
Our resident wordsmith and wit-master, Geoff Miller, when posed with
the question "What's a squick?" rattled off a reply, in jest, that
is was skull fucking. I can't match nor retrieve the words he used
to describe this act, but it amounted to "squick" was the sound
produced by the act.
Mikey, being of roughly the proper emotional age to take
alt.tasteless at face value, will parrot Geoff's tongue-in-cheek
definition.
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug5.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>
> < !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Peeve:
>
>
> < I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
> < Finally!
> < Money!
> < Power!
> < NO MORE ROOMATES!
> < HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
> < No more school!
> < No more debt!
> < *sigh*
> < and the best part:
> < I still keep my usenet access!
>
> Uh, sorry to rain on the old victory parade, but
> "job interview" does not equal "job", speaking
> from personal experience.
>
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! I'm having a moment. You know this and I know this
(well, I know it *objectively*), but right now I'm happy to even *have*
and *interview*. I went out and bought new socks and everything.
HauteCouturePeeve: After paying more than a ceratin amount for things, they
take on whole new names. Shampoo becomes Hair And Body Gel. Socks become
Hosery for Men (I am *not* kidding).
HauteCouture!peeve: I know this because I went shopping yeasterday, and did
my favorite thing: bought things I can't afford ;-).
> Oh, and "booby hatch" is somewhat older synonym
> for "loony bin"......
>
Gasp! Oh, the humanity! I am crushed :-)
NAWT!
> ObPeeve: 01sybok is just too, too similar to the logon
> of a rather, er, energetic poster from MIT.
>
> It's disconcerting to think that there could
> be virtual copies posting around.
Well, they say everyone in the world has a double.
Mike
Nosy
< Perhaps I've made a mistake; perhaps someone on this network really
< did appreciate your posts. I'm new to this job, and I'd like some
< feedback. Does anyone want to speak up for this wretch, or shall we
< throw him to the dogs?
Alpo-rama.
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug4.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>>
>>> It hurts me to have to tell you, Mike, but all
>>> those other groups didn't kick you out just 'cause they're mean and
>>> nasty and they can't appreciate intelligent & sensitive folks like
>>> you. No, Mikey my boy, they showed you the door because, deep down,
>>> at a level (alas) beyond the curative powers of medical science, you
>>> just ain't a very interesting fellow.
>>
>>Actually, Curtis, you chromosomal abberation with USENET access, those other
>>arguments were more like debates. And if I'm not that interesting, why are
>>you responding to my article.
>
> Because Steve's gone and my conscience just deputized me Acting
> Immigration Officer, and since I guess I have to spell it out more
> clearly your application has just been stamped >>DENIED<<.
>
Well, running on the assumption that in a moment totally devoid of sanity
I *were* to emigrate ( and I have no intention of it as of yet) I assure you my
final act as Peevetown's earstwhile Surgeon General, I believe my final act
woudl be to give you a full frontal lobotomy. Opps, looks like somebody has
beaten me to the punch.
> You don't seem entirely devoid of intelligence, though, so it might be
> worth explaining what I mean by "interesting," and why you aren't it.
>
> Obviously, some poor fool having given you a computer and told you how
> to work it,
^^^^^^^
perfect grammar? I think not.
you've been traipsing through alt.this and soc.that,
> looking for a nice rowdy place like the basement of your frathouse the
> morning after a hard night with the Milwaukee Beast, or whatever vile
> piss you think of as beer. Coming upon alt.peeves at a slack point,
> you got the impression that it was exactly the sort of place you were
> looking for.
Ah Curtis, how too terribly original. The "frat" thing again. Do try to be a
*little* more original... hmm?
>
> A place where you could misspell every third word; where you could
> mutilate grammar and piss upon punctuation; where you could drop line
> feeds and hide them in corners to be gnawed on by the cat, and
> _nobody would notice_.
>
Blame my editor. It's been acting up lately. As I type this the letters appear on
my screen at random.
> Well, in fact, Peevetown _is_ a place like that. It's just a
> coincidence that every regular poster to this group has perfect
> grammar and spelling.
Ah, this would explain phrases like "work it."
Right.
>Such are, after all, the table manners of
> conversation; any civilized person has them, but even barbarians
> can be interesting at dinner.
> You, however, are not. This judgment might puzzle you; I'm sure
> you're the wittiest boy in your frat and make a big hit at toga
> parties. But alt.peeves is a higher league. To play ball in these
> parts, you've got to have the tools of the trade:
>
> 1) Refined prose.
> 2) Character and style.
> 3) Humor and wit.
>
> With two of three you might make it; with NONE, you just ain't
> ready for the pros.
This from the man who has made more silly generalizations and relied on
more stereotypes in one post than I have seen of heard in months.
I'd say those silly stereotypes would qualify you for the category
"Distinctly lacking" in any of your categories.
>
> But don't get yourself down. These qualities, or lack thereof, aren't
> etched in your genes. They're skills that can be developed with
> practice and time. My advice to you, Mike: forget about Usenet for a
> few years, and go live a full and varied life. Join the Peace Corps.
> Run away to Afghanistan and link up with the Muja-Haddeen. Sell drugs
> in the tough back alleys of Edmonton. Learn to ride and apply for a
> job with the RCMP. Become a wealthy and corrupt options trader on the
> Toronto commodity exchanges; make ten million and lose it all in a day.
> Write the Great American Novel, and fail to sell it. Start a Glenn
> Miller cover band, buy a suit of red velvet, and spend the next three
> years playing lounges. In short: live a little, it'll make you
> interesting.
I'm not going to post my resume Curtis, but ten bucks says I am a more
interesting person than you are. What a charming notion you have of the RCMP
too. They *do* drive in cars, you know.
>
> Growing up an Albertan farmboy and matriculating to frathood at St.
> Mary's University won't, and hasn't. Unfair it may be; but there's
> no use crying over spilt milk.
And there's the "frat" thing again. Good heavens Curtis, I've been hearing
about your legendary wit, and this is the best you can do? frat frat frat?
How terribly un-clever of you.
I neither attend Saint Mary's (I took one course there, and was forced to use
that account when I overshot the budget on this one) nor grew up in Alberta.
What made you think I grew up in Alberta?
>
>>Sorry pal, but I'm here for the next little while.
>
> And that, of course, you may be. Usenet has no mechanism for
> censorship. We can waste our breath humiliating you, but we
> can't forcibly kick you out. Eventually we end up doing what
> most groups do in this situation: just ignoring you. Most
> people are smart enough to take the hint.
>
> Perhaps I've made a mistake; perhaps someone on this network really
> did appreciate your posts. I'm new to this job, and I'd like some
> feedback. Does anyone want to speak up for this wretch, or shall we
> throw him to the dogs?
How kind of you to speak for however many hundred/thousand people who read a.p,
Curtis. I'm sure they appreciate it. How clever of you to know what they are
all thinking.
>
Well, Curtis, tell you what. I don't like this flamewar any more than you do.
Believe it or not. Why don't we continue it email, or drop the whole thing if
you like. Of course, if *you* want to keep the flamewar going here's that's
fine with me too. It's your choice.
I await your rresponse.
Mike
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> (Allan Evans) writes:
>>> EAT SHIT YOU BRAIN DEAD, HALF SQUICKED, SHEEP FUCKING PIECE OF TOEJAM!
>>
>>Well, the eating shit part might be appropriate in a.t, but not neccesarily
>>in a.p. Half squicked? My Oxford English Dictionary is not by my side, but
>>I was not aware I had a "squick".
>
> In an effort to squelch the disinformation Mikey will provide you,
> "squick," in the SF Bay Area alternative sex scene, refers to an
> act, usually sexual, which the speaker finds distasteful. "Yeah.
> Tom and Ned threw a party last Friday, but they started squicking
> around midnight so I left."
>
> Our resident wordsmith and wit-master, Geoff Miller, when posed with
> the question "What's a squick?" rattled off a reply, in jest, that
> is was skull fucking. I can't match nor retrieve the words he used
> to describe this act, but it amounted to "squick" was the sound
> produced by the act.
>
> Mikey, being of roughly the proper emotional age to take
> alt.tasteless at face value, will parrot Geoff's tongue-in-cheek
> definition.
>
Nope. If you wanna find out what "squick" means, ask Geoff. Ask him who made
it up, if he'll tell you. And I'm supposed to look for something deep and
meaningful in alt.tasteless? Sounds a little pretentiuos to me.
M
242 lbs before cooking
>Nope. If you wanna find out what "squick" means, ask Geoff. Ask him who made
>it up, if he'll tell you. And I'm supposed to look for something deep and
>meaningful in alt.tasteless? Sounds a little pretentiuos to me.
Listen, cuspidor-breath: I know what Geoff is going to say because
1) I was *there* when he made the original reply. I'm not a
Mikey-come-lately with an absurd case of cockiness.
2) I have the archives of the event.
I have a great amount of respect for Geoff's imagination and rolled
on the floor with the rest of the alt.tasteless world when he penned
his definition. I have little respect for the thought-free gits
that currently traipse about the net shreiking "Squick felch squick
felch gif gif gif." You're like a bunch a five year olds that have
latched onto their first dirty word.
Now, maybe you can open that little lockerroom of a mind you have
long enough to cogitate this: Geoff made up the definition. He
didn't make up the word.
drew
Geoff Miller
In article <1992Aug6.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>Socks become Hosery for Men (I am *not* kidding).
^^^^^^
Maybe the term derives from the price, perhaps?
On a similar note, I was driving through Redwood City during my lunch
break today, and I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair.
I shit you not.
Geoff
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
"Liberace was a great piano player, but he sucked on the organ." --Mike Oxbig
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Geoff Miller
In article <1992Aug6.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>Nope. If you wanna find out what "squick" means, ask Geoff. Ask him who made
>it up, if he'll tell you. And I'm supposed to look for something deep and
>meaningful in alt.tasteless? Sounds a little pretentiuos to me.
I'm afraid Andy's right, Mike. About a year and a half ago, some self-
described lesbian crossposted an article to alt.sex, alt.sex.bondage and
alt.tasteless in which she expressed a desire to learn what "squicking"
was. I'd never heard the word before myself, but I liked the sound of
it, so I decided to employ a bit of reverse onomatopoeia and come up with
something, hopefully a concept that was exceptionally tasteless.
After giving it some thought, I decided that "squick" sounded like the sound
that would result if someone were to drill a hole in the top of someone's
skull and have direct carnal relations with their brain. So I submitted
that definition in jest, alnong with a rather detailed description of the
mess that would be made by such an activity, and the next thing I knew, it
had been given canonical status in the alt.tasteless FAQ list.
It would be an interesting exercise in the study of urban folklore to
determine the geographical progression of the definition. Hmmm, maybe I
should write to Professor Brunvand...
Geoff
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Geoff Miller + + + + + + + + Sun Microsystems
geo...@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM + + + + + + + + Menlo Park, California
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Alex Elliott
>
>did appreciate your posts. I'm new to this job, and I'd like some
>feedback. Does anyone want to speak up for this wretch, or shall we
>throw him to the dogs?
I'll be kind to the dude and give him a suggestion for improvement. He
should learn to pare down quoted articles. If there are eighty lines
quoted from an article I just read with only four new lines from the new
poster, even the wittiest, most engaging prose becomes enervated and
insipid.
Mr. Mike tends to leave far, far too much stuff from the old articles
he is following up on. Take my advice, Mr. Mike. Do some more trimming
and you will appear more intelligent without having to work at it.
And never, never leave in someone's .sig unless you plan to comment
on it. Nothing is more unprofessional than a quoted .sig hanging off
the end of your posting.
Alex Elliott
The Lemming.
ell...@minerva.cs.yale.edu
Curtis Yarvin
>> [flame-bait newbie post, deleted]
>>
>> [cogent rebuttal of one Mr. Yarvin in response to a flame-bait
>> newbie post, deleted]
>>
>> Caaaaareful mikey. Didn't your mommy ever tell you what happens
>> to BAAAAAAAAD wittle boys when they play with matches?
>
>She did, then I had her killed.
Your wit, sir, overwhelms me.
c
Scott Larnach
>It's funny to have interviewees come into my office, terrified that
>they didn't were a nice enough suit and find that they've run into a
>den of Levi worshipers
My suit - the one and only suit I have ever owned - my suit which I
paid 300 pounds for five years ago, about $600 that is, and it looks
every penny of that - is strictly reserved for funerals and weddings.
Except for one occasion, that is, when I did a few days work for a
certain three letter acronym company where everyone wears dark blue
suits. As a wierdo commie hippy longhair, I found it amusing to
discover that I was the best dressed person in the entire building.
Luckily (for them) I managed to avoid making any management decisions.
Oddly enough, that suit is the only article of clothing I have ever
owned that fitted me properly. Maybe there's a moral in there
somewhere. Does anyone in Edinburgh know of a good supplier of bespoke
jeans and tee shirts?
S
Not Al Crawford
>
> It's funny to have interviewees come into my office, terrified that
> they didn't were a nice enough suit and find that they've run into a
> they've gone too far in the opposite direction,
Peeve: unexpected dress codes. I once spent a few months doing data entry
work (marginally less exciting than watching paint dry) for a temp agency.
After two or three jobs where Office Dress had been mandatory (i.e. time
for me to drag out my one vaguely smart shirt and the nauseaous jade tie I
picked up in a sale) I found myself on assignment at Bilston Glen Colliery.
Now I figured that since I was doing computer work, I'd be in the big
office block beside the pit and that the usual office stuff would do. Hah!
There are few things that make you feel more out of place than wearing a
smart(ish) shirt and tie while surrounded by people wearing overalls, hard
hats and a thick layer of coal dust. Russ's den of Levi worshippers would
have been considered positively effete by this crowd. The office I was
expected to work in was covered in coal dust, about 10 metres from the mine
shaft and looked like the sort of office you'd expect in a gold mine in a
Western.
The job apparently had a very high turn-over rate. The fact that the
sophisticates in the "office" expressed disappointment that I "wasnae a
lassie. We usually git lassies. Pfwoagh! <accompanied by a variety of
highly expressive gestures with their arms>" might well explain it. I quit
after a grand total of about three hours, not because of sexual harassment,
but because a) I was being expected to use half a dozen different packages
I'd never even seen before without a manual, the terminal was connected via
a 300 baud line to an ancient mainframe in Yorkshire (which probably
explains the fate of the manuals - they were being decrypted by
Egyptologists somewhere) and the terminal itself was coated in something
halfway between tar, grease and what you'd expect someone to sneeze out of
their nose after inhaling coal dust for a week. I figured that since
strange and unusual punishments weren't in the job description, I was quite
entitled to quit. Oddly enough, the agency didn't seem too surprised and
were, if anything, pleased I'd lasted as long as I did.
After that job, going to work for the suits at IBM next was a positive
relief.
!Peeve: Bilston Glen Colliery was closed and razed to the ground a couple
of years back.
--
Not Al Crawford - Not_Al_...@ed.ac.uk
"The water shines/A sheepdog skips across the face/A dozen times"
01s...@ac.dal.ca
>
> Your wit, sir, overwhelms me.
>
> c
Why thanks (Mike digs toe in ground modestly, while smirking a secret smirk).
But I already knew that ;-)
Mike
Gerald Combs
[ Pages and pages of stuff deleted ]
> Well, Curtis, tell you what. I don't like this flamewar any more than you do.
> Believe it or not. Why don't we continue it [in] email or drop the whole thing
^^^^^^^^ ^^ ^^^^ ^^^^^ ^^^^ ^^^ ^^^^^
^^^^^
> if you like. Of course, if *you* want to keep the flamewar going here's that's
> fine with me too. It's your choice.
Please do.
Peeve: News software without any sort of kill facility. This _should_ be
remedied soon, however.
- Gerald Combs
_____ __o Internet : gco...@vax1.umkc.edu
----- -\<, Bitnet : gcombs@umkcvax1
----- ( )/ ( )
I blame Sherwood Schwartz for everything bad that happened during the
'70's.
Scott Larnach
> I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair.
An engine needs to be properly lubricated.
S
Laura Potler (GSFC)
>In an effort to squelch the disinformation Mikey will provide you,
>"squick," in the SF Bay Area alternative sex scene, refers to an
>act, usually sexual, which the speaker finds distasteful. "Yeah.
>Tom and Ned threw a party last Friday, but they started squicking
>around midnight so I left."
not the way i understand it. i've seen it used as "what tom and ned
did with that gopher really squicked me".
--
-lp ****************************************************************
* "i may make you feel but i can't make you think" --Jethro Tull *
*********************************************************************
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug5.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>> One thing that I have noticed is that many Canadians that post to this
>>> group tend to start out with a very self-congratulatory, know-it-all
>>
>>That's because ( as you must know, if you are Canadian) that's how we are in
>>real life.
>
> Jeez. Are you going to wear that red ball nose and those floppy
> shoes for any length of time? Or are you just in the habit of
> squeezing the bulb on your horn when someone calls you proud without
> cause and shallow?
>
I was merely pointing out the Canadian weakness for this sort of thing.
I am neither proud nor ashamed of this.
> Other than that, it just really did nothing for me. No images
> really came to mind until about the third line, when I envisioned
> you as a chattering monkey.
That's kind of peculiar, since when I first saw that 242lbs thing, I
automatically pictured some short, loud, rude, fat, balding,
socially inept, recently divorced, embittered little man in a 90% polyester,
off-the-rack ill fitting outfit(complete with sweat stains), who perhaps was
beginning to question the meaning of what is (in your case) a meaningless and
trivial existence. I could therefore understand why such a pathetic specimen
would turn to a newsgroup, perhaps in desperation, for affirmation in an
otherwise trivial and isolated life.
Mind pictures are kind of odd, aren't they?
>
> On the other hand, if I made references to alcohol-induced
> vomiting, date rape, group masturbation, academic probation, or
> senseless class discrimination in conjuntion with you, I have little
> doubt that most peevers could immediately envision you, in the act.
>
>
> (See? Concise, understandable, and effective.)
>
Well, stereotypical, incorrect, unoriginal and not that interesting would
be a better description.
>>Well, since I got called a "facist" I think I'm even. PUDWANKING? ME?
>>Hey look pal, I've got a body over which even *men* get wet. Of
>
> Oops. A little semantic slip, Mikey. I think you meant to say
> "I've got a body over which even men wet." Unless, of course, you
> meant the back of their throats got wet with bile, in which case I
> stand corrected.
Nope. I meant what I said originally. Let's try again.
It's difficult for men to "get wet" over anything (anatomically speaking)
Subsequently, if even *men* were to get wet over a body like mine, it must be
something wonderful.
> Why doesn't it surprise me that you consider fag allegations
> insulting.
Aren't you the one who, a few lines ago, threw "group masterbation"
into the arena? If you're going to play More Politically Correct Than Thou,
at least try to be consistent.
>
> Next time you're two-fingering the nub, I'll bet you think of Mel
> Gibson. Really. Mel Gibson.
Nahh... if I were to picture a guy while performing a five knuckle chuckle,
it'd be myself. That's the kind of guy I am ;-)
>
>>!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Peeve:
>>I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
>
> Anyone this excited about an interview is clearly unemployable. I
> would make a comment about counting your chicken before they hatch,
> but this would require the ability to count.
>
Haven't figured that one out yet, have you? That's too bad.
Now now. No need to be bitter, or petty. I'm just getting the excitement out
of my system before the interview. ;-). Funny, I'd have said anyone with your
negative attitude would be unemployable. I guess it takes all kinds.
> falmes? You're "felling" too good? Are you going to demonstrate
> you're illiterate in your interview?
>
Nahhh... My fyping ifn't fhat good ;-) fhat's all.
Mike
Chiron
has happened since.
yar...@highlite.uucp (Curtis Yarvin) writes:
> grammar and spelling. Such are, after all, the table manners of
> conversation; any civilized person has them, but even barbarians
> can be interesting at dinner.
They can even play nice rugby. Mind you, it is more a state of spirit
then a team. At every match I have seen them, they managed to play
their game to the end. To hell with those who watch the scoreboard
instead.
You may or may not know much about rugby as you may or may not know
much about the Grand Duchy of Luxembourg. In the end that doesn't
matter.
ObPeeve: Dostoievski died calmly in his bed, whereas Tolstoi didn't.
When you read their books, you get the impression that they did
everything to convince you that it should have been the other way
round. If you don't understand, try reading their books. It is worth
finding out.
An the AntiPeeve that goes with it: Young writers that have not yet
become sophisticated enough to hide the truth.
There is also a MegaPeeve, but I better keep that one quit.
--
Just prose.
Nosy
< In article <1992Aug6.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
< >[elation at getting an INTERVIEW and Nosy's comments carefully excised]
< >Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! I'm having a moment. You know this and I know this
< >(well, I know it *objectively*), but right now I'm happy to even *have*
< >and *interview*. I went out and bought new socks and everything.
< New socks? Wow! What utter dedication to the seeking of a job.
Could be. Could be the first time he's bought socks since
he started college; maybe it's taken this long for him
to figure out why no one would ever sit within 2 meters
of him in classes...
<ObPeeve: interviewing.
I'll see you that one and raise you a phone screen and
a "site visit" or "plant trip", your choice of terms.
<Trying to come up with questions that find out
<if this person is a complete untalented drip or a talented system
<ghod, and if he's an asshole is he an asshole that you can live with.
Hear, hear! Honesty, at last.....
ObPeeve: interviewers who are, shall we say, less than totally
honest....
<We've got one of everything, but if they're good enough I'll work
<with them regardless - hell, they have to work with me and that should
<be punishment enough.
Worse than that, they have to not flinch when Russ
tries to get them to go to the gun show....
< It's funny to have interviewees come into my office, terrified that
< they didn't were a nice enough suit and find that they've run into a
< den of Levi worshipers, then watch the look in their eyes that maybe
< they've gone too far in the opposite direction, and that it's not a
< good idea to be better dressed than the interviewer... I had one of
< them the other day, and it really cheered me for the entire dreary
< afternoon.
That's because they still care about the interview process....
if they got to the stage where interviewing is all a big
game not unlike "getting a date for the prom" in High
School, then being better dressed than the entire company
would merely be another source of amusement.
< ObPeeve': my thumb still hurts, and I didn't get a good photo. I'd be
< willing to demonstrate the nail ripping technique one a suitable model
< - did I hear a volunteer?
I reckon Mitre corporation has a suitable subject for
the demonstration......if he/she/it is still "on this
echo".....
Rick Gordon
>Part of this was originally an email reply. Something entirely else
>has happened since.
No kidding!
> [ ... Something about table manners, rugby (?), then: ]
>ObPeeve: Dostoievski died calmly in his bed, whereas Tolstoi didn't.
>When you read their books, you get the impression that they did
>everything to convince you that it should have been the other way
>round. If you don't understand, try reading their books. It is worth
>finding out.
>
>An the AntiPeeve that goes with it: Young writers that have not yet
>become sophisticated enough to hide the truth.
>
>There is also a MegaPeeve, but I better keep that one quit.
Hello! <noknoknok> Serge, is that you in there? We seem to be a bit
desynchronized. This looks like an excellent response to something
other than what I've read. Ever.
If Tolstoi *had* died in Dostoevski's bed, there would have been a
three-part miniseries *at least*.
>Just prose.
--
Rick Gordon | "Loud is good."
ri...@netcom.com | -- Frank Loesser
Bill Berbenich
>My suit - the one and only suit I have ever owned - my suit which I
>paid 300 pounds for five years ago, about $600 that is, and it looks
>every penny of that - is strictly reserved for funerals and weddings.
>Except for one occasion, that is, when I did a few days work for a
>certain three letter acronym company where everyone wears dark blue
>suits. As a wierdo commie hippy longhair, I found it amusing to
>discover that I was the best dressed person in the entire building.
>Luckily (for them) I managed to avoid making any management decisions.
Good God (a bit stringy, but good enough for a stew), Scott! You weren't
told the cardinal rule of IBM-dress? That is, NEVER out-dress anyone
'over' you.
Peeve: Getting bitched at for dressing better than a previous boss.
--
"Among free peoples, the open exchange of ideas
ultimately is our greatest security." - President Ronald Reagan
242 lbs before cooking
>I found myself on assignment at Bilston Glen Colliery.
>expected to work in was covered in coal dust, about 10 metres from the mine
>shaft
I give up. Why was there all this coal dust at a dog farm? And why
was it limited to Collies?
drew
ba...@abingdon.sun.com
--
"If you add a teaspoon of wine to a barrel of sewage, you get sewage.
If you add a teaspoon of sewage to a barrel of wine, you get sewage.
This, my son, is entropy."
242 lbs before cooking
>In article <l81nu1...@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM> ba...@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) writes:
>>act, usually sexual, which the speaker finds distasteful. "Yeah.
>>Tom and Ned threw a party last Friday, but they started squicking
>>around midnight so I left."
>
>not the way i understand it. i've seen it used as "what tom and ned
>did with that gopher really squicked me".
Hmmm. I haven't heard it used that way, but then I've only heard it
used once in conversation. The comment was that an S&M crowd turned
an event into a squicking party for the straights. Given the
context, I guess it could be either. The definition I was given by
the user of the term was roughly what I said before.
andy
242 lbs before cooking
>That's kind of peculiar, since when I first saw that 242lbs thing, I
>automatically pictured some short, loud, rude, fat, balding,
>socially inept, recently divorced, embittered little man in a 90% polyester,
Well see what happens when you're too lazy to do any research. About
the only one you hit was "rude." And if you had any hope of proving
to people that you umbilical cord was cut longer ago than last night,
you've failed now. It wasn't more than two months ago that most
people on this list exchanged physical descriptions. It was more
recently that I posted two gif files of myself. Just so you don't
step on your crank *again* (it must be getting painful), I'm 6'6",
have a 36" waist and a 52" chest. I have hair halfway down my back, a
full beard and moustache, and not a hint of a receding hairline. I've
absolutely no plans of ever getting married, and can get along fairly
well in just about any social circle I'm involved in. I'm caustic,
not embittered. And yes, I weigh 242 lbs, give or take 5 on any given
day. Now maybe you'll have be just a wee bit creative and not look
like a complete stooge by using insults that, as a matter of public
record, are patently false.
>off-the-rack ill fitting outfit(complete with sweat stains), who perhaps was
36 x 40 Levis and XL T-shirts fit me quite well, thank you. And as
much as I know you'd like to, you can't have access.
>beginning to question the meaning of what is (in your case) a meaningless and
>trivial existence. I could therefore understand why such a pathetic specimen
>would turn to a newsgroup, perhaps in desperation, for affirmation in an
>otherwise trivial and isolated life.
Excuse me, chubby-lips. This newsgroup is entertainment for me. I
don't turn to the readers for affirmation, I turn to the posters for
fodder. And you almost got a chuckle out of me on this one, based on
your abject toadyism to the alt.tasteless readership in your puling
cries for affirmation yesterday. Sad to say they didn't wage your
battle for you.
That's ok. I think you look cute, hanging on that thread, whipping in
the breeze.
>> On the other hand, if I made references to alcohol-induced
>> vomiting, date rape, group masturbation, academic probation, or
>> senseless class discrimination in conjuntion with you, I have little
>> doubt that most peevers could immediately envision you, in the act.
>Well, stereotypical, incorrect, unoriginal and not that interesting would
>be a better description.
But, you see, it doesn't matter *one* bit. If I accused you of
buttfucking an aardvark, it might be colorful, but it's pretty
unbelievable.
If I accused you of waking up with your face in your own gastric acid
so many times your skin was flaking or you cut your foreskin on your
thumbnail because you were being too, uh, vigorous, the best you could
do is cry "I do not! MOMMY!"
The simple fact of the matter is that I don't have to fabricate a
thing about you. Your logical clumsiness and ignorance that knows no
bounds speaks for itself. You've shown that you're half-assed and
half-cocked. The only comments you've made that even had a semblence
of a coherent stream of thought were marred by your blunder of
woefully incorrect information.
This may be stereotypical (in fact, in your case, I'd be surpised if
it wasn't), unoriginal, and in your mind, not that interesting.
There's no denying it's correct.
>It's difficult for men to "get wet" over anything (anatomically speaking)
>Subsequently, if even *men* were to get wet over a body like mine, it must be
>something wonderful.
The timing is so incredibly off that you couldn't have been trying to
be witty. It's sad the you've deluded yourself so.
>Aren't you the one who, a few lines ago, threw "group masterbation"
>into the arena? If you're going to play More Politically Correct Than Thou,
>at least try to be consistent.
That's mastUrbation, bright boy. And yeah, I threw it in because I
knew you'd be frightfully put out by the comment. Yes, you're that
predictable.
I'm hardly politically correct (another example of your blantant
inability to get a grip on a situation before attempting to bluster
your way in.) My point, which obviously buzzed your sloping brow, is
that calling someone homosexual is hardly an effective way of
belittling them. If you turned on the Osterizer in your head for a
moment, you'd realize that it gets you labeled an asshole without
having the slightest impact on your typical, emotionally stable
person, regardless of sexual preference.
>Nahh... if I were to picture a guy while performing a five knuckle chuckle,
>it'd be myself. That's the kind of guy I am ;-)
Five knuckles ... that's the two in the thumb and the three on the
index finger? You do have an opposable thumb, don't you? Pardon me,
it was just a guess. Evolution is a wonderful thing.
>Now now. No need to be bitter, or petty. I'm just getting the excitement out
>of my system before the interview. ;-). Funny, I'd have said anyone with your
>negative attitude would be unemployable. I guess it takes all kinds.
No, I got hired for my mental skills. Something of which you're obviously in
no danger.
Don Baldwin
>>
>> Your wit, sir, overwhelms me.
>>
>
>But I already knew that ;-)
Hey Curtis, he doesn't even understand irony.
Let's try PoliticalSpeak, that'll confuse him into wetting his diaper...
don
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
"If a fetus is a person, why does it look like a steamed prawn?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Don Baldwin - Software Engineer - e-mail to: do...@tamri.com
Chiron
: Hello! <noknoknok> Serge, is that you in there? We seem to be a bit
: desynchronized.
Sender: ser...@syma.sussex.ac.uk (Chiron)
Sigh! I have replied by email. If you should feel desynchronized too, please
mail ser...@syma.sussex.ac.uk.
Peeve: Yougorail. Back in 88 it was. Some hundred miles south of Belgrade,
a controller and my train ticket:
- Where is you reservation?
- Sorry, what reservation do you mean? I haven't seen any reservation
notices on these seats.
- You need to have a reservation to travel by train.
- Ah, I didn't know that was necessary in Yougoslavia.
- (Controller having another glance at the ticket) What's that? Where
is your ticket?
- _That_ is my ticket. If you have a closer look, you will even find the
stamp that the Greek controller has put into it.
Well at least he is looking now. Takes his time.
- That ticket is for young persons. You are an adult.
- Yes, that's what it is. The ticket is four young persons under 26.
Under twenty six.
- Stay calm. This ticket is not valid. It is for minors. You need to by a
new one from me.
- (Ding it makes in my head) Well, we will check that out with the
Chef de Gare at the next station.
- You have to buy a new ticket now.
- May I have my ticket back?
- No, I keep it. I will call the police at the next station.
Won't tell how I managed to find the controller and get the ticket
back from the controller after the train had stopped at the next station.
I managed. He did not come with me to the stations office. The train left
without me.
AntiPeeve: The north of Greece, Macedonia, and the south of Serbia are
great by train. Probably one of the most beautiful lines in the world.
(Anti)Peeve: I met great people in the new train. From Macedonia. If
I could, I would send a hundred thousand heavily armed soldiers there and
tell them to shoot with all what they have at any soldier from the four
neighbouring countries who dares to cross the border. Slav Macedonia
is a European treasure. For how long?
...
Lucky lot you are here in Britain. Actually I have come to know BR quite
well (From Kyle of Lochalsh to Exeter). Did I say ScotRail?
I'll post to the BR threat when I will feel a bit better.
P.S. I find BR has some charme. In Germany trains are so boring.
--
Romancing the killfile ...
Alexander Vrchoticky
>[...] I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair. I shit you not.
similarly, who'd have thought that `rubbermaid' is a brand-name for
tupperwaresque plastic containers?
-alex
--
Alexander Vrchoticky al...@vmars.tuwien.ac.at
TU Vienna, CS/Real-Time Systems +43/1/58801-8168
A. Jing Hippy
|>
|>
|> In article <1992Aug6.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
|>
|> >Socks become Hosery for Men (I am *not* kidding).
|> ^^^^^^
|>
|> Maybe the term derives from the price, perhaps?
|>
|> On a similar note, I was driving through Redwood City during my lunch
|> break today, and I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair.
|> I shit you not.
In beautiful Stone Mountain, Georgia, is a rather large manufacturing plant
that has emblazoned on its wall: "Mechanical Rubber Company". That always
brought a lot of interesting images to my mind.
When I worked in a school supply house, we used to sell cots to kindergartens
that were made by "Tucker Duck and Rubber Company". I always loved that
one.
+--------------------------------------------------+
|Dave Cochran, Data General Corporation, RTP, NC |
|coc...@dg-rtp.dg.com |
+--------------------------------------------------+
|By God, Mr. Chairman, at this moment I stand |
|astonished at my own moderation! |
| --Baron Robert Clive of Plassey |
+--------------------------------------------------+
Russ Kepler
>geo...@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
>
>>[...] I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair. I shit you not.
>
>similarly, who'd have thought that `rubbermaid' is a brand-name for
>tupperwaresque plastic containers?
OK, if we're going to follow this path: Trojan Batteries. I used to
see signs for these all along the highways in the west USA, and always
had to chuckle.
--
.signature: not found. Create?
Curtis Yarvin
>> did appreciate your posts. I'm new to this job, and I'd like some
>> feedback. Does anyone want to speak up for this wretch, or shall we
>> throw him to the dogs?
>
>Curtis. I'm sure they appreciate it. How clever of you to know what they are
>all thinking.
I admire your literacy. Have a reading-comprehension brownie, Mike.
The responses have been few, but unanimously negative; I would allow a
few more days for all the votes to trickle in, but - frankly speaking
- this democracy thing is a bit new and I don't think much of the idea
anyway, so the ballot is hereby declared closed.
It seems unlikely, as things stand, that you'll obey The Will Of The
People(tm). I don't expect to convince you of anything; I'm not very
good at convincing. What I will do is post a short history and
sociology of alt.peeves, which is something that should have been
made into a FAQ a long time ago but hasn't. A lazy lot, we peevers.
Wandering into the wrong part of alt.peeves at the wrong time of day,
it's very easy to come to the conclusion that the place is a sort
of bush-league alt.flame - full of shrill yelling over utter
trivialities, bald-faced personal attacks, and rampant rudeness.
Well, we do have our slums. Largely populated by recent immigrants -
people who wander into said slums and, finding the place congenial,
assume that the whole town is infested by drunken beggars, flocks of
yelling children, and tin-roof shacks with no sewers and pigs where
the porch should be. It's enough to make a profane man wonder about
recursions and origins.
But the ideal of alt.peeves, if sinking, is a mile above the pigs.
The last Laputa in a world that thinks "Laputa" means "the whore."
The last bastion, in short, of civilization. Our empires may be
gone, our armies may have lost their swords in the mud and shambled
down to the pub for a brainrot cocktail of Bud Lite and television,
our servants may have had flashes of inspiration while passing the
cemetery, revolutionized modern politics, and left their mongrel
offspring to govern the world - but there's still a place where
a gentleman never offends anyone intentionally, where a lady can
set your face glowing with a two-word remark in dulcet tones
and impeccable typography, and it, peasant child, is _here_.
The purpose of alt.peeves is not "flaming," but _conversation_.
To TV-whelped brats like you, civilized conversation may be a lost
art; but we've _found_ it, and if this be a museum it is at least a
lively one. With a nasty doorman and a punji turnstile - for we
throwbacks like to be left alone.
Leave us, please, to our harmless vices. When you throw a
party, we do not insist on pissing in your beer; it seems no
more than common courtesy for you to refrain from pissing on
our newsgroup.
We appreciate your past politeness in this matter, and hope
that it will continue.
c
Curtis Yarvin
>
>a gentleman never offends anyone intentionally
That, of course, was "unintentionally."
Give me a spelling typo any day! Give me twenty! Better to play the
barbarian, than play a half-wit pansy in public. Egg on my face,
and an omelet to go. When will this damnable hangover pass?
c
01s...@ac.dal.ca
ba...@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) writes, while wiping drool
from the keyboard:
> 01s...@ac.dal.ca (Mikey) writes:
>>That's kind of peculiar, since when I first saw that 242lbs thing, I
>>automatically pictured some short, loud, rude, fat, balding,
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
The operative word ( if had bothered to read ) was PICTURED. You know,
synonym for IMAGINED. You can read, can't you?
> I've absolutely no plans of ever getting married,
Women everywhere are breathing sighs of relief, I'm sure.
> 36 x 40 Levis and XL T-shirts fit me quite well, thank you. And as
> much as I know you'd like to, you can't have access.
>
Thanks, I'd rather hop naked on a pogo stick through a feminist picnic held
on a minefield while shaving my head with sandpaper and chewing on tinfoil.
But don't take it personally. And weren't you the one who accused me of
being homophobic a couple of posts back.
> Excuse me, chubby-lips. This newsgroup is entertainment for me. I
> don't turn to the readers for affirmation, I turn to the posters for
> fodder. And you almost got a chuckle out of me on this one, based on
> your abject toadyism to the alt.tasteless readership in your puling
> cries for affirmation yesterday. Sad to say they didn't wage your
> battle for you.
>
You're excused, sweet cheeks.
Hey, pal, I just didn't want them gettig pissed at me for somethig I didn't do.
And as for USENET, it's the only thing that keeps me going (not counting
massive amounts of coffee) at work.
> That's ok. I think you look cute, hanging on that thread, whipping in
> the breeze.
>
I'm *always* cute. But that's not the point.
> If I accused you of waking up with your face in your own gastric acid
> so many times your skin was flaking or you cut your foreskin on your
> thumbnail because you were being too, uh, vigorous, the best you could
> do is cry "I do not! MOMMY!"
>
Acutally, the best I can do is not fall asleep at such boring and colourless
fare. Such things rather unoriginal, and therefore not not excire my attention.
Oh, and I find if you keep your fingernails well groomed, you usually avoid
such accidents. You are free to do with this advice what you wish.
> The only comments you've made that even had a semblence
> of a coherent stream of thought were marred by your blunder of
> woefully incorrect information.
Funny, I though we were discussing mental PICTURES of people. I still maintain
my mental image of you, even though I now have a physical description, simply
because it was the one I started out with. The tone of your posts aids this
description.
> This may be stereotypical (in fact, in your case, I'd be surpised if
> it wasn't), unoriginal, and in your mind, not that interesting.
> There's no denying it's correct.
Sure there is. Nobody in my fraternity (that I know of) has ever met even a
single aspect of your characterization. Subsequently, the only comments *you*
have made than even resemble a coherent stream of thought are marred by *your*
blunder of woefully incorrect information.
> The timing is so incredibly off that you couldn't have been trying to
> be witty. It's sad the you've deluded yourself so.
Actually, I think it's just that you weren't smart enough to pick it up the
first time. If you *still* can't understand, I'll be happy to explain it to
you again.
>>Aren't you the one who, a few lines ago, threw "group masterbation"
> That's mastUrbation, bright boy.
Thanks. I guess we can all tell what you do in your spare time, then.
> Five knuckles ... that's the two in the thumb and the three on the
> index finger? You do have an opposable thumb, don't you? Pardon me,
> it was just a guess. Evolution is a wonderful thing.
It is, isn't it? Especially when we all get a look at a living example of
Darwin's Grab Bag, such as yourself. How're those frontal lobes coming along?
> No, I got hired for my mental skills.
Ah. So tell me, how much *do* lab specimens get paid?
Mike
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug7.0...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>>
>>> Your wit, sir, overwhelms me.
>>>
>>
>>Why thanks (Mike digs toe in ground modestly, while smirking a secret smirk).
>>But I already knew that ;-)
>
> Hey Curtis, he doesn't even understand irony.
>
Hmm... ***Somebody*** oughta pick up a dictionary and look up "sarcasm."
Mike, the Reigning King of Obtuse
Allan Evans
> do...@igor.tamri.com (Don Baldwin) writes:
> >>> Your wit, sir, overwhelms me.
Mike Quote One:
> >>Why thanks (Mike digs toe in ground modestly, while smirking a secret smirk).
> >>But I already knew that ;-)
> > Hey Curtis, he doesn't even understand irony.
>
> Hmm... ***Somebody*** oughta pick up a dictionary and look up "sarcasm."
Okay.
Mike Quote Two:
> Mike, the Reigning King of Obtuse
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
THIS, perhaps, is true irony. (Mike Quote Two)
from: American Heritage Dictionary
sarcasm
-n. 1 A sharply mocking or contemptuously *ironic* remark intended to
designed to wound another.
irony
-n. 1 a) The use of words to convey the opposite of their literal
meaning. b) An expression or utterance marked by such a
deliberate contrast between apparent and intended meaning.
c) A literary style employing *ironic* contrasts for
humerous or rhetorical effect. 2 Incongruity between what
might be expected and what actually occurs.
I suppose Mike Quote One could be sarcasm... It is true that Mike is
*NOT* modest, and probably could not smirk secretly as well. However,
it is likely that Mike did not know what he was talking about.
It is for this reason that I conclude that MQ1 is in fact misplaced
irony. Sarcasm is *intended*, whereas irony need only exist, intended
or not (definition 2). Mike Quote Two also fits into this category
I think... it is unlikely that the irony of his signature is apparent
to his occasionally sparking neuron.
Peeve: Not having a dictionary in my office. I have the American
Heritage Dictionary on line (MS Bookshelf on CD) but I find it slow
and more of a pain to use than a RealBook (tm). Now, if I can only
convince somebody around here that I NEED the new Oxford English
dictionary on CD...
Disclaimer: Since I don't have a dictionary handy.. and our unix spell
stuff is not setup right... spellings contained in my
posts may or may not reflect the
OneTrueSpellingThatGhodIntended. So phucque Awph.
Al
still in Oz
_______________________________________________________________________________
| Yes, I know my return address is messed up. Petition my sysadmin.......... |
| Allan H. Evans * School of Geography * UNSW * PO Box 1 Kensington 2033 Aust.|
| all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU Remote Sensing and Spatial Information Systems |
Mark Nesdoly
I should really be posting this to alt.tasteless, but the above quote
reminded me of a true story one of my former co-workers told me.
Darcy's uncle used to make "bread wine" -- some kind of homemade wine that
you made in a five gallon pail, and put pieces of bread on top. This pail
was kept in a closet. Also, this was in the days before plumbing was in
the house, so they kept a pail in the same closet for doing your business
(read: shit and piss) at night, instead of running outside to the outhouse.
One day, Darcy's uncle and all of his drinking buddies decided to sample the
wine. They drank about 4 - 4.5 gallons of it when Darcy's aunt came into
the kitchen laughing, and holding the wine pail. She then showed them all
the logs that were floating in the bottom of the pail. One guy puked all
over the table, and the rest turned green.
Darcy's uncle: "WHO SHIT IN MY WINE??!!!"
His daughter: "I took a poop last night, daddy."
Darcy's uncle: "C'MERE!!!" <WHACK> <WHACK>
At this point Darcy ran home.
Peeve: Not being there. I would have loved to have seen their faces.
-- Mark
Bill Berbenich
Damn! Just when I was sure that Norman and Curtis were the same individual!
David Philip Langstaff
itself to be the property of "Onan Generators".
Now what's all this seed doing on the floor ?
--
Dave Langstaff | Janet:d...@uk.ac.aber.cs | Disclaimer: All my own work.
Any views expressed are those of the author alone. | Phone:(0970)622838
After-life, After-shave, don't hold with any of it, bleugh! - Sir Henry
242 lbs before cooking
>The operative word ( if had bothered to read ) was PICTURED. You know,
>synonym for IMAGINED. You can read, can't you?
Good. This means that you have enough of an imagination to draw
mental images. This puts your IQ well into the double digits, if I
recall the scaling.
My point, dear vacuous one, was you published blatantly wrong
data. Conjuring insults is only effective if you can convince others
they're true. You were in no such position.
Now, I realize I used some big words there, so let me restate that:
Mikey speak. See Mikey speak. Speak, Mikey, speak. Mikey play game.
Mikey try to win game. Mikey make story (we're up to two syllables
now) to win game. Story is wrong. Other people know story is wrong.
Mikey not win game.
>Women everywhere are breathing sighs of relief, I'm sure.
I suppose we have to have fantasies ...
Oops.
Mikey plays game again. Mikey have no facts. Mikey plays game alone.
Mikey still not win game.
>Thanks, I'd rather hop naked on a pogo stick through a feminist picnic held
>on a minefield while shaving my head with sandpaper and chewing on tinfoil.
Gee. This might have been funny is I didn't read it in alt.tasteless
less than a week ago. Or was it here?
>You're excused, sweet cheeks.
>Hey, pal, I just didn't want them gettig pissed at me for somethig I didn't do.
You mean you didn't want them getting upset, thinking you had actually
formed a cogent thought? I think you had little to worry about.
>Acutally, the best I can do is not fall asleep at such boring and colourless
>fare. Such things rather unoriginal, and therefore not not excire my attention.
Well, I'm not sure what I would have to do to "not not excire your
attention," but it probably isn't worth my while.
I wasn't trying to be interesting or colorful. I simply enumerated
several of the ploys I could have used, had I been so inclined.
I also stated that I didn't need to use those ploys, since you're a
one man circus, without the talent.
If I stuck my head inside your tent, I'd see cobwebs on the riggings
and trampolines, a bunch of inbred, lethargic animals, and a pathetic
clown that ran to the barren stands after each "act" and applauded
himself, loudly.
>Oh, and I find if you keep your fingernails well groomed, you usually avoid
>such accidents. You are free to do with this advice what you wish.
Brian and I already discussed this. We both keep our thumbnails well
trimmed.
>Funny, I though we were discussing mental PICTURES of people. I still maintain
I was talking about your misuse and wimpering insistance of the
meaning of "squick." You were paging through your Vanity Fair and
asking everyone if they had any Kleenex. I guess that's where the
communication breakdown happened.
>> This may be stereotypical (in fact, in your case, I'd be surpised if
>> it wasn't), unoriginal, and in your mind, not that interesting.
>> There's no denying it's correct.
>
>Sure there is. Nobody in my fraternity (that I know of) has ever met even a
>single aspect of your characterization.
First off, (which I'm sure you usually are) *I* wasn't talking about
your characterization. See above. Secondly, your fraternity is not
representative of the world in general. If you ever overcome your
agoraphobia, you'll realize that are vast segments of the populace
that didn't have Daddy buy them their friends.
>Subsequently, the only comments *you*
>have made than even resemble a coherent stream of thought are marred by *your*
>blunder of woefully incorrect information.
And the PeeWee Herman ploy is dead. It was pummeled and bludgeoned to
that state quite some time ago.
>Actually, I think it's just that you weren't smart enough to pick it up the
>first time. If you *still* can't understand, I'll be happy to explain it to
>you again.
Let me show you this card trick ...
>> That's mastUrbation, bright boy.
>
>Thanks. I guess we can all tell what you do in your spare time, then.
You mean you deduced that I devote some of my spare time to keeping my
writing skills strong even to be intelligible? Or did someone tell
you this?
>It is, isn't it? Especially when we all get a look at a living example of
>Darwin's Grab Bag, such as yourself. How're those frontal lobes coming along?
WIT! He used WIT! All those times I told Mr. Gordon that no amount of
intensive education would ever teach a chowder brain like Mikey
anything: gone. Or do you think it might have just been an accident,
Rick?
>> No, I got hired for my mental skills.
>
>Ah. So tell me, how much *do* lab specimens get paid?
We don't pay you anything. Most of you are fool enough to just show
up on your own.
Scott Larnach
>Good God (a bit stringy, but good enough for a stew), Scott! You weren't
>told the cardinal rule of IBM-dress? That is, NEVER out-dress anyone
>'over' you.
Mmm... yes, I agree... but needs extra salt for my taste.
Oh yes, suits... My status was that of independent consultant. I was
outside the hierarchy... and I wanted to make damn sure that they all
knew it! Besides, my pay cheque was coming from a different office.
s
p.s. If anyone's been sending personal replies to anyone on
festival.ed.ac.uk (or som...@ed.ac.uk) there'll be delay. The bloody
machine is totalled at the moment.
--
Ream Sig.
Scott Larnach
>was it limited to Collies?
The Collie is Scotland's favourite sheepdog. Also, mining Scotties for
example, the digging/dog ratio is so high it cuts into the profits. In
the good old days of Greyfriars Bobby, you could practically pick them
up off the hillsides. But all the old open cast workings are worked
out now.
There are all these damn useless coal deposits that need to be dug
through to get to the collie deposits. What a mess.
Dog farm? You think they grow on trees?
S
--
Ream Sig.
Rick Gordon
>01s...@ac.dal.ca (Mikey) writes:
> [ Lots of flimflamery deleted ... ]
>>It is, isn't it? Especially when we all get a look at a living example of
>>Darwin's Grab Bag, such as yourself. How're those frontal lobes coming along?
>
>WIT! He used WIT! All those times I told Mr. Gordon that no amount of
>intensive education would ever teach a chowder brain like Mikey
>anything: gone. Or do you think it might have just been an accident,
>Rick?
Sometimes there's nothing for it but patience, Andy. That we're here at all
is the end result of a finite but large number of such spontaneous
mutations. It *is* borderline exciting to see this sort of thing happen
while the experiment is in progress, but let's not jump to conclusions.
I saw a quotation in somebody's signature that may be applicable. I
don't remember the author, unfortunately. "The singular of data is
not anecdote."
>andy
Eric Minch
By all means try it sometime, you pretentious lackwit:
sar casm \'sa r-,kaz-em\ n
[F or LL; F sarcasme, fr. LL sarcasmos, fr. Gk sarkasmos, fr. sarkazein
to tear flesh, bite the lips in rage, sneer, fr. sark-, sarx flesh;
akin to Av thwares- to cut]
(1579)
1: a sharp and often satirical or ironic utterance designed to cut or
^^^^^^
give pain
2a: a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter,
caustic, and often ironic language that is usu. directed against an
^^^^^^
individual
>
> Mike, the Reigning King of Obtuse
ob tuse \a b-'t(y)u s, eb-\ adj ob tus er; -est
[L obtusus blunt, dull, fr. pp. of obtundere to beat against, blunt,
fr. ob- against + tundere to beat more at OB-, STINT]
(15c)
1a: lacking sharpness or quickness of sensibility
or intellect: INSENSITIVE, STUPID
b: not clear or precise in thought or expression <obtuse language>
syn see DULL
--
Eric Minch Any resemblance to the opinions of persons
Epistemic Artisan or organizations other than myself--living,
Stanford Genetics dead, or imaginary--is purely fortuitous.
s...@gnv.ifas.ufl.edu
> In article <l83159...@jethro.Corp.Sun.COM>, geo...@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
|> In article <1992Aug6.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
> |> >Socks become Hosery for Men (I am *not* kidding).
> |> ^^^^^^
> |> Maybe the term derives from the price, perhaps?
> |>
> |> On a similar note, I was driving through Redwood City during my lunch
> |> break today, and I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair.
> |> I shit you not.
>
> In beautiful Stone Mountain, Georgia, is a rather large manufacturing plant
> that has emblazoned on its wall: "Mechanical Rubber Company". That always
> brought a lot of interesting images to my mind.
>
> When I worked in a school supply house, we used to sell cots to kindergartens
> that were made by "Tucker Duck and Rubber Company". I always loved that
> one.
On I-81, in Penna. I believe, there is a company known as the Tingly Rubber
Products. I even got a picture of it.
SAC
Peter Alan Dutton
>In article <1992Aug8.163428.12485@bbxrbk> russ@bbxrbk (Russ Kepler) writes:
>>In article <1992Aug8.1...@email.tuwien.ac.at> al...@vmars.tuwien.ac.at (Alexander Vrchoticky) writes:
>>>geo...@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
>>>
>>>>[...] I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair. I shit you not.
>>>
>>>similarly, who'd have thought that `rubbermaid' is a brand-name for
>>>tupperwaresque plastic containers?
>>
>>OK, if we're going to follow this path: Trojan Batteries. I used to
>>see signs for these all along the highways in the west USA, and always
>>had to chuckle.
>>
>Driving past Eastleigh airport in Hampshire, a large wharehouse reveals
>itself to be the property of "Onan Generators".
>
>Now what's all this seed doing on the floor ?
Hey - that's the best little wharehouse in England!
(Insert comments about the differences between "warehouse" and "whorehouse".
Almost a really good typo, but not quite)
Peter!
B A Page
[Blah Blah Blah]
You know, I am beginning to get flashes of deja vu about Mikey. I
remember a while back when Jenni and !Al had a number of regular posters
dangling on a wire when "Jenni's fiance" started posting to the net.
This caricature deliberately set out to write substandard, poorly
thought-out peeves which were actually designed to get the more
trigger-happy peevesters crawling over one another in eagerness to have
first aim at the clueless dork.
Anyone else see the parallel?
Has some kind Net paragon noticed that the boys were getting restless
and decided to dangle some new and enticing bait?
Babs
Charles Parr
>In article <l85tk7...@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM>,
>ba...@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) writes, while wiping drool
>from the keyboard:
>Thanks, I'd rather hop naked on a pogo stick through a feminist picnic held
>on a minefield while shaving my head with sandpaper and chewing on tinfoil.
Hmmmm...He's getting a little better, people. Maybe we
need to load with lead (as opposed to rubber) bullets?
>It is, isn't it? Especially when we all get a look at a living example of
>Darwin's Grab Bag, such as yourself. How're those frontal lobes coming along?
>
>> No, I got hired for my mental skills.
>
>Ah. So tell me, how much *do* lab specimens get paid?
Yes, definatly improving.
Look, Mikey, I'm gonna give you some fatherly advice.
If you could post entire articles with the wit levels
you've just shown in the quoted highlights above, we
would find you marginally acceptable.
Sort of like the jester in a kings court, mind you,
but we all have to start somewhere.
So run along and shake your stick and bladder, okay?
Regards, Charles
--
Within the span of the last few weeks I have heard elements of
separate threads which, in that they have been conjoined in time,
struck together to form a new chord within my hollow and echoing
gourd. --Unknown net.person
Gerald Combs
wrote:
No one's mentioned Ridgid Tools yet. I can't believe it.
- Gerald Combs
_____ __o Internet : gco...@vax1.umkc.edu
----- -\<, Bitnet : gcombs@umkcvax1
----- ( )/ ( )
"A thousand cheshire cats grin inside of me." -- XTC
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug6.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>>
>>> Perhaps I've made a mistake; perhaps someone on this network really
>>> did appreciate your posts. I'm new to this job, and I'd like some
>>> feedback. Does anyone want to speak up for this wretch, or shall we
>>> throw him to the dogs?
>>
>>How kind of you to speak for however many hundred/thousand people who read a.p,
>>Curtis. I'm sure they appreciate it. How clever of you to know what they are
>>all thinking.
>
> I admire your literacy. Have a reading-comprehension brownie, Mike.
>
I would, Curtis except:
a) I am allergic to chocolate.
b) God knows what you'd put in it ;-)
> It seems unlikely, as things stand, that you'll obey The Will Of The
> People(tm).
Nope. Probably not.
I don't expect to convince you of anything; I'm not very
> good at convincing.
You heard it here first, folks. :-)
[rather a long and (it kills me to admit this, but) eloquent descritption
of what alt.peeves is all about deleted]
> To TV-whelped brats like you, civilized conversation may be a lost
> art; but we've _found_ it, [...]
Thank you, Curtis, but Mom is an English teacher, and I assure you I am as
literate as the next person here. It is an unfortunate conspracy between my
inept fingers and and editor from Hell that may occaisionally make me appear
as anything else.
> Leave us, please, to our harmless vices. When you throw a
> party, we do not insist on pissing in your beer; it seems no
> more than common courtesy for you to refrain from pissing on
> our newsgroup.
I don't throw parties. I don't drink beer. I don't piss on newsgroups. Not very
eloquent, but there you have it.
> We appreciate your past politeness in this matter, and hope
> that it will continue.
>
I assume this means I have made it through the firewall.
Does this mean you and I (and maybe Andy) can bury the hatchet? I don't
mean between the eyes.
Mike
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> Mike Quote One:
>> >>Why thanks (Mike digs toe in ground modestly, while smirking a secret smirk).
>> >>But I already knew that ;-)
>
> Mike Quote Two:
>> Mike, the Reigning King of Obtuse
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>
> THIS, perhaps, is true irony. (Mike Quote Two)
I think it rather more ironic that I take an obtuse pride in being purposely
obtuse, don't you, Al?
[definitions deleted]
> I suppose Mike Quote One could be sarcasm... It is true that Mike is
> *NOT* modest,
GASP! caught! *smirk* (Al, please note: This is sarcasm).
>and probably could not smirk secretly as well. However,
> it is likely that Mike did not know what he was talking about.
>
Or gee Al, maybe I did, and was being obtuse on purpose. What a neat thought,
eh? (said with a mixture of sarcasm and irony, for the terminally stupid.)
> It is for this reason that I conclude that MQ1 is in fact misplaced
> irony. Sarcasm is *intended*, whereas irony need only exist, intended
> or not (definition 2). Mike Quote Two also fits into this category
> I think... it is unlikely that the irony of his signature is apparent
^^^^^^^ well, *there's* a shocker.
> to his occasionally sparking neuron.
Gee, Al. Maybe I'm smarter than you think, and combined sarcasm, irony *and*
obtuseness, all into two lines. Gee for all the effort you put into analyzing
this post, you'd think I was Shakespere ( I say "was" instead of "were"
because you just never know...)
Mike, (Smarter than Al, or just better looking? You be the judge)
Don Baldwin
>>smirk).
>>>But I already knew that ;-)
>>
>> Hey Curtis, he doesn't even understand irony.
>>
>
>Hmm... ***Somebody*** oughta pick up a dictionary and look up "sarcasm."
sar.casm (sar'kazm) 1. A taunting or caustic remark, generally ironical.
2. The making of such remarks. 3. Sarcastic quality.
Here's one for you: please look up "feeble".
>Mike, the Reigning King of Obtuse
Otherwise known as Mike, who posts to alt.peeves with one hand. Hey,
this ties in with that post about Onan Motors or whatever...
don "not above toying with the weak" baldwin
Dan Sorenson
> No one's mentioned Ridgid Tools yet. I can't believe it.
I hate to mention it again, but was present for the following:
"Do you handle Rigid tools?"
"Don't *ever8 hand me a strait-line like that again!"
Anyway, in the small town of Bumfuck (actually, Nevada), Iowa,
there is a shop that proudly displays the following sign: "S&M Appliance".
I have often wondered if there was a special area in that otherwise-normal
shop, and what you had to do in order to gain entrance.
--
<Dan Sorenson, DoD #1066 |"There'll be angels on Ariels in leather>
<z1...@exnet.iastate.edu | and chrome, Ridin' down from heaven >
<vik...@iastate.edu | just to carry me home." -- R. Thompson >
< ISU thinks I need more education, which they provide for a fee. >
Paul Goldberg
>In article <1992Aug08....@highlite.uucp>, yar...@highlite.uucp (Curtis Yarvin) writes:
>[rather a long and (it kills me to admit this, but) eloquent descritption
>of what alt.peeves is all about deleted]
>I assume this means I have made it through the firewall.
>Does this mean you and I (and maybe Andy) can bury the hatchet? I don't
>mean between the eyes.
Apparently Curtis' description omitted one important feature. Perhaps
most people wouldn't need to be informed of it, having read the title
of this newsgroup. This is that the primary function of alt.peeves is
to discuss that which annoys you. Preferably things "out there" in the
Real World, as opposed to fellow-posters, and their opinions of one's
contributions.
No-one "makes it through the firewall" until the average quality of
their posts exceeds an imprecisely-defined threshold. This is
alternatively known as contributing positively to the signal/noise
ratio. It is not actually hard to achieve this. But if a new poster
comes along and generates several threads which are more or less
content-free, in that they consist of uninformed abuse and no bona
fide peeves, the rest of us will start to get upset. It seems to me
that Curtis' description alluded to above has so far been the only
saving grace of Mike's contributions.
Paul.
Voltaire to Rousseau, on reading Rousseau's "Ode a la Poste'rite'":
"Mon ami, voila une lettre qui ne sera jamais recue a son addresse"
01s...@ac.dal.ca
>
> By all means try it sometime, you pretentious lackwit:
>
Mike *smirk*
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug9.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>In article <l85tk7...@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM>,
>>ba...@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) writes, while wiping drool
>>from the keyboard:
>
> need to load with lead (as opposed to rubber) bullets?
>
>
Ah... affirmation ;-)
> Sort of like the jester in a kings court, mind you,
> but we all have to start somewhere.
>
That's ok, I'll just wait until everyone is asleep, then kill them all and...
oops. Never mind
Mike *smirk*
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug9.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>>>Why thanks (Mike digs toe in ground modestly, while smirking a secret
>>>smirk).
>>>>But I already knew that ;-)
>>>
>>> Hey Curtis, he doesn't even understand irony.
>>>
>>
>>Hmm... ***Somebody*** oughta pick up a dictionary and look up "sarcasm."
>
> sar.casm (sar'kazm) 1. A taunting or caustic remark, generally ironical.
> 2. The making of such remarks. 3. Sarcastic quality.
>
> Here's one for you: please look up "feeble".
>
Feeble /'fi:b(e<- this is a shwa))l: 1: someone who takes everything at face
value. 2)Don Baldwin's sexual prowess.
Well, in MY lexicon, anyway.
Mike *smirk*
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> In article <1992Aug9.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes
> (yeah - and don't we all wish he hadnt:
>
> [Blah Blah Blah]
>
> You know, I am beginning to get flashes of deja vu about Mikey. I
> remember a while back when Jenni and !Al had a number of regular posters
> dangling on a wire when "Jenni's fiance" started posting to the net.
>
> This caricature deliberately set out to write substandard, poorly
> thought-out peeves which were actually designed to get the more
> trigger-happy peevesters crawling over one another in eagerness to have
> first aim at the clueless dork.
>
> Anyone else see the parallel?
>
Sorta. Except now the clueless dorks are replying to the original *ahem* poster.
Mike *smirk*
242 lbs before cooking
>I assume this means I have made it through the firewall.
Is this an invitation to cut you open and see if you're done, yet?
Don't delude yourself, big boy. The only conceivable way that you
can think you're a fixture is in that your tanned hide is stretched
above the door with "Welcome to alt-dot-fucking-peeves" scrawled on it
and your intestines are strung as streamers.
Your smirking head has been put on a pedestal for use in shooting
practice. It's labeled as the "Easy Target."
>Does this mean you and I (and maybe Andy) can bury the hatchet? I don't
>mean between the eyes.
I think I'll keep the hatchet around. There's still a pretty high
demand for toothpicks.
drew
01s...@ac.dal.ca
orderlies and discovering a USENET terminal):
> 01s...@ac.dal.ca (Mikey) writes:
(Well, looks like I'm caught with that damn nickname *again* :-)
> Good. This means that you have enough of an imagination to draw
> mental images. This puts your IQ well into the double digits, if I
> recall the scaling.
I have to ask... if my IQ is so low, why are you bothering to reply, unless...
Oh, *I* get it... we aren't going too quickly for you, are we? Please let me
know. We'll try to use words of one letter ir less. Now, Andy, don't get
frustrated. You know you'll only work yourself into another seizure, and
we don't want *that* to happen...
> Conjuring insults is only effective if you can convince others
> they're true.
Remember this. It'll come in handy later.
Insults are effective if they make people laugh. I got a few laughs. That's
what counts. That they were at your expence only improves matters.
> Now, I realize I used some big words there, so let me restate that:
[cute post exposing Andy's true vocabulary deleted]
Well, I try never to follow an inferior act but here we go. Let's try
anodda one:
Mikey post. See Mikey post. Post Mikey post. See Andy get upset. Cry Andy
Cry. Why does Andy cry? Andy's upset because he recognizes a superior intellect
and can't stand the fact that somebody else is using his little toy.... oops.
Sorry. Got carried away.
> I suppose we have to have fantasies ...
What, like the one you were telling me about the other day with the
three choirboys and the vat of vegetable oil...? Damn. Sorry Andy.. can't
seem to keep these things under my hat.
> Mikey plays game again. Mikey have no facts. Mikey plays game alone.
> Mikey still not win game.
Mikey get upset and reach his hand down Andy's throat and rip out Andy's vocal
chords. alt.peeves cheers. People everywhere sigh with relief.
> I wasn't trying to be interesting or colorful.
Oh, good. Wasn't *that* lucky.
> I also stated that I didn't need to use those ploys, since you're a
> one man circus, without the talent.
Well, I am no longer a one man circus. I hired your grandmother the other day.
Hey, it's not often you get a fat lady *and* a bearded lady rolled into one.
So tell me, are any of your other freakish relatives looking for work?
> If I stuck my head inside your tent I'd see, [...]
>a bunch of inbred, lethargic animals,
Ah, so you've *met* my family.
> Brian and I already discussed this. We both keep our thumbnails well
> trimmed.
Ah... nothing like being right (again.)
> First off, (which I'm sure you usually are) *I* wasn't talking about
> your characterization. See above. Secondly, your fraternity is not
> representative of the world in general. If you ever overcome your
> agoraphobia, you'll realize that are vast segments of the populace
> that didn't have Daddy buy them their friends.
***This is where you should recall what Raggedy Headed Andy said about
insults and accuracy.***
Actually, the fraternity is pretty close to life in general. We have people
from all walks of life, and quite a few from different countries.
(whoops, how'd that non flame creep in?)
Oh, and unlike some people on the net (Hint: I am implying that the following
applies to *you* Andy) I paid my own way, both in the fraternity and through
college. That's why I'm in debt up to my ears. What was that about insults and
faulty data you were saying? Perhaps we'd better go back over that enchanting
story you wrote, and substitute my name for yours. Of course, this assumes you
have the cognitive skills to create that little epic. I'm not really sure you
posess the creativity. I smell plagerism, since I doubt you are that clever.
>>> That's mastUrbation, bright boy.
>>
>>Thanks. I guess we can all tell what you do in your spare time, then.
>
> You mean you deduced that I devote some of my spare time to keeping my
> writing skills strong even to be intelligible?
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
That, too.
Oh, and judging from that last phrase, I'd spend a little more time on practice.
No, no, Andy, I meant WRITING practice! Good heavens. And If I were you, I'd
consider trimming my thumnail a bit more. You seem to have drawn blood.
> WIT! He used WIT!
Tsk. I suppose the concept *is* pretty foreign to you, Andy, but do try to
control your excitement. The orderlies might mistake it for another seizure and
decide to come back and give you another round of ECT, this time upping
the voltage.
>All those times I told Mr. Gordon that no amount of
> intensive education would ever teach a chowder brain like Mikey
> anything: gone. Or do you think it might have just been an accident,
> Rick?
Who is Rick? Your parole officer? Your psychiatrist? Your bondage bud?
Inquiring minds wanna know.
>>Ah. So tell me, how much *do* lab specimens get paid?
>
> We don't pay you anything. Most of you are fool enough to just show
> up on your own.
I thought you said the Pee Wee Herman thing was dead.
Later
Mike *smirk*
Gerald Combs
other
chimpanzees wrote, over a given amount of time:
> Mike, (Smarter than Al, or just better looking? You be the judge)
Neither. <BANG!> Next case.
Don Baldwin
>Feeble /'fi:b(e<- this is a shwa))l: 1: someone who takes everything at face
>value. 2)Don Baldwin's sexual prowess.
>
>Well, in MY lexicon, anyway.
What, did I hurt you?
don
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The true pleasure of life is to live with your inferiors."
-William Makepeace Thackeray
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Don Baldwin - Software Engineer - e-mail to: do...@tamri.com
242 lbs before cooking
In article <1992Aug11....@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>I have to ask... if my IQ is so low, why are you bothering to reply, unless...
Because, like the gnat you so closely resemble, you're an annoyance.
>Remember this. It'll come in handy later.
I will.
>Insults are effective if they make people laugh. I got a few laughs. That's
>what counts. That they were at your expence only improves matters.
No one denies you got a few laughs. That they're the same type of
laughs one affords to the terminally flustered doesn't seem to have
quelled your pigheaded determination. I'm not laughing at you, Mikey.
I'm laughing *near* you.
>Mikey post. See Mikey post. [ ... ]
What an inspiration of wit! What a truly unique approach! Tell me,
are you *at all* capable of using a method of humor or debate that
wasn't forcibly shoved down your throat less than a week prior?
>What, like the one you were telling me about the other day with the
>three choirboys and the vat of vegetable oil...? Damn. Sorry Andy.. can't
>seem to keep these things under my hat.
No need. It wasn't something I would have said in confidence.
I didn't realize you were the guy the spit-cleaned my windshield and
bummed a quarter last week, either.
>Well, I am no longer a one man circus. I hired your grandmother the other day.
>Hey, it's not often you get a fat lady *and* a bearded lady rolled into one.
>So tell me, are any of your other freakish relatives looking for work?
Oh boy! Now the familial attacks. There's an original ploy if I've
ever seen one. Roll into it the fact that the a.t article with the "fat
lady and bearded lady" yuck hasn't even expired at my site and
you're just a vessel of ingenuity.
>Actually, the fraternity is pretty close to life in general. We have people
>from all walks of life, and quite a few from different countries.
>(whoops, how'd that non flame creep in?)
>
>Oh, and unlike some people on the net (Hint: I am implying that the following
>applies to *you* Andy) I paid my own way, both in the fraternity and through
>college. That's why I'm in debt up to my ears. What was that about insults and
>faulty data you were saying?
My most humble apologies, fancy-pants. I didn't realize that the
government and banks in Canada were so fivolous as to loan money to
boys in puberty so they could buy their own friends. My, but they're
open minded up there.
>Perhaps we'd better go back over that enchanting
>story you wrote, and substitute my name for yours. Of course, this assumes you
>have the cognitive skills to create that little epic.
To which little epic are you refering?
>I'm not really sure you
>posess the creativity. I smell plagerism, since I doubt you are that clever.
This from a guy that should include the original message id of each
line he uses? You're so shallow you don't even cast a shadow.
>Who is Rick? Your parole officer? Your psychiatrist? Your bondage bud?
>Inquiring minds wanna know.
I don't need to answer this because if you had an ounce of perception,
you'd already know. As it is, you just persist in proving your
cranium is an echo chamber of original lines off the net. You have yet
to show any associative skill to a person's posting style, content or
demeanor when you reply. You just fire a scud, and if it doesn't hit
its mark, at least it makes a big noise, right? If I wanted to get
bombarded with yesterday's news, I'd wait until the Mercury was
on microfiche at the library.
Your recognition skills are purely Pavlovian. If the name on the
article is yarvin or banta, it's time to go trawl the net for some
fascinating quips to dump their way. If the name is geoffm, it's time
to limber up the tongue for some interloping and spread his cheeks.
Everything else just sort of falls through the aggregate with nary a
trace to be found. Oops that's wrong. Scan it for some line that you
can use as a soggy dagger in the future.
I doubt you'd recognize your dick if you didn't know it was clenched in
your sweaty fist.
You're one of the most pitiful examples of a wannabe that's ever
wandered this way.
In a last ditch effort, so your brain doesn't get tricked doing any
logical leaps of faith: Go away. If I wanted a yappy little dog at
my ankles, I'd go to the fucking SPCA.
>Mike *smirk*
Quoth the grinning idiot.
Charles Parr
>> In article <1992Aug9.1...@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>>>In article <l85tk7...@exodus.Eng.Sun.COM>,
>>>ba...@blagg.Eng.Sun.COM (242 lbs before cooking) writes, while wiping drool
>>>from the keyboard:
>>
>> Hmmmm...He's getting a little better, people. Maybe we
>> need to load with lead (as opposed to rubber) bullets?
>>
>> Yes, definatly improving.
>>
>Ah... affirmation ;-)
Nope. Amazement. Don't get cocky, punk.
BTW, the gratuitous use of the smiley is only for those
bozos who cannot convey humour through language, and
*know* it. If you have to resort to pretty pictures
you probably aren't ready for real posts.
>> Sort of like the jester in a kings court, mind you,
>> but we all have to start somewhere.
>>
>That's ok, I'll just wait until everyone is asleep, then kill them all and...
>oops. Never mind
And then defile the corpses? Watch it bub, there are a
good many obguns, and several ObBroadswords being
toted by these people...And Peevetown *never* sleeps.
I would like to return this TOBACCONIST; it is scratched
>It's difficult for men to "get wet" over anything (anatomically speaking)
>Subsequently, if even *men* were to get wet over a body like mine, it must be
>something wonderful.
The next time you have a fuckless date with Muffy from Tri-Del take a look
at your pants. See the wet spot? No, not the yellow one, the one that
is all slippery. This is highly concentrated sperm, put out by your
body so that even a clutz can knock up a woman if she's fertile.
--
"If I had killed her when I had first thought about getting divorced,
I would have been out of jail by now."
-- A newly-divorced guy I met at a block party
I would like to return this TOBACCONIST; it is scratched
>(Not Al Crawford) writes:
>>I found myself on assignment at Bilston Glen Colliery.
>> [ ... ] The office I was
>>expected to work in was covered in coal dust, about 10 metres from the mine
>>shaft
>I give up. Why was there all this coal dust at a dog farm? And why
>was it limited to Collies?
Becuase they're the kind of dogs most worth having.
You don't have charcoal briquet mines, but you do have diamond mines.
Gerald Combs
lbs before cooking) wrote:
> "If you add a teaspoon of wine to a barrel of sewage, you get sewage.
> If you add a teaspoon of sewage to a barrel of wine, you get sewage.
> This, my son, is entropy."
Hmmmm... Substituting 'Mikey *Smirk*' for 'sewage' and 'alt.peeves' for
'wine' pretty much describes the quality of this newsgroup over the past
week or so.
Peeve: Substituting 'Mikey' etc. etc.
- Gerald Combs
_____ __o Internet : gco...@vax1.umkc.edu
----- -\<, Bitnet : gcombs@umkcvax1
----- ( )/ ( )
"I was going to join a sorority once, but I already had a personality"
-- Judy Tenuta
S. Jonson
In article <1992Aug10....@morrow.stanford.edu>,
mi...@lotka.stanford.edu (Eric Minch) writes:
|>
|> By all means try it sometime, you pretentious lackwit:
|>
|>
|>Hey! I resent that. I am not a lakcwit.
|>
|>Mike *smirk*
|>
I agree. Mike *smirk* is not a lakcwit. He's dyslexic. 'Splains lots.
He's prolly also a limpwick. 'Splains more.
--
Nolan "Go away, boy. Ya bother me!" Hinshaw
Internet: no...@twg.com Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197
"If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it
with a computer." David Wittenberg, in Risks Digest 13.70
"Boy, was I in for a dose of reality." Randall K. Abler
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody." Rick Gordon
Judge Wapner
In article <gcombs-11...@134.193.10.10>, gco...@vax1.umkc.edu (Gerald Combs) writes:
|>
|>In article <1992Aug10....@ac.dal.ca>, 01s...@ac.dal.ca and 99
|>other
|>chimpanzees wrote, over a given amount of time:
|>
|>> Mike, (Smarter than Al, or just better looking? You be the judge)
|>
|> Neither. <BANG!> Next case.
|>
!peeve: Concise rebuttals to mindless drivel. Well done, Gerald. Harry Stone'd
be proud of ya.
Peeve: Mikey won't go away, and neither will the other n-1 chimps out there
who drivel with such enthusiasm.
--
Nolan "20 years hard labor! Court's adjourned." Hinshaw
Skrymir the Jotun
Go away, little gnat, before someone comes after you with a swatter.
Oh, BTW, this one's for you
CCCCC LL UU UU EEEEEEEEEEEE
CC CC LL UU UU EE E
CC LL UU UU EE
CC LL UU UU EE E
CC LL UU UU EEEEEEE
CC LL UU UU EE E
CC LL UU UU EE
CC CC LL L UU UU EE E
CCCCC LLLLLLLLLLLL U UUUU EEEEEEEEEEEE
--
Nolan "Quick, Maude! The Flit!" Hinshaw
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>
>
> The next time you have a fuckless date with Muffy from Tri-Del take a look
> at your pants. See the wet spot? No, not the yellow one, the one that
> is all slippery. This is highly concentrated sperm, put out by your
> body so that even a clutz can knock up a woman if she's fertile.
> --
a) Re: the header. That's 01Sybok, to you, pal.
b) I date Buffy. My brother Skip dates Muffy.
c) We're usually doing the nasty before I have time to notice any lubrication
(you know how those sorority girls are !)
d) I said "difficult" not "impossible. Since you're such an authority on
anatomy, you must know women tend get get far more lubricated then men.
e) whoops. No (e). I got carried away.
Mike
Alexander Vrchoticky
>c) We're usually doing the nasty before I have time to notice any lubrication
tsk, tsk, tsk. how inconsiderate.
-alex
--
Alexander Vrchoticky al...@vmars.tuwien.ac.at
TU Vienna, CS/Real-Time Systems +43/1/58801-8168
charles stross
In article <1992Aug10.1...@aber.ac.uk> d...@aber.ac.uk (David Philip Langstaff) writes:
>In article <1992Aug8.163428.12485@bbxrbk> russ@bbxrbk (Russ Kepler) writes:
>>In article <1992Aug8.1...@email.tuwien.ac.at> al...@vmars.tuwien.ac.at (Alexander Vrchoticky) writes:
>>>geo...@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM (Geoff Miller) writes:
>>>
>>>>[...] I saw a sign for a business called KY Auto Repair. I shit you not.
>>>
>>>similarly, who'd have thought that `rubbermaid' is a brand-name for
>>>tupperwaresque plastic containers?
>>
>>OK, if we're going to follow this path: Trojan Batteries. I used to
>>see signs for these all along the highways in the west USA, and always
>>had to chuckle.
>>
>Driving past Eastleigh airport in Hampshire, a large wharehouse reveals
>itself to be the property of "Onan Generators".
>
>Now what's all this seed doing on the floor ?
>
In the fine city of Bradford there is a company that proudly
proclaims on a hoarding that faces the road, "LUBICO -- leaders
in lubricants". The side-splitter in this is that the road in
question is named after that famous scion of Yorkshire, the
artist David Hockney (whose personal habits you are welcome
to guess at).
Maybe they're all part of some vast, globe-spanning multinational?
--
This .sig file has been rescued by the Sigfile Liberation Front
CatWoman
]mi...@lotka.stanford.edu (Eric Minch) writes:
] |>
] |> By all means try it sometime, you pretentious lackwit:
] |>
] 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
] |>
] |>Hey! I resent that. I am not a lakcwit.
] |>
] |>Mike *smirk*
] |>
]
] I agree. Mike *smirk* is not a lakcwit. He's dyslexic. 'Splains lots.
Hey! I resent THAT!!! Gives us dyslexis a bad name, y'know!
Geoff! Sic 'em!
Peeve: I can't think of anything more clever to say.
Dyslexia does strange things to the thought processes
on output, also...
] He's prolly also a limpwick. 'Splains more.
Not going to volunteer to find out - have enough
on my hands convincing the PYM that HeteroSeXuality
is NOT a DeathKult!
Diana
Friend-of-Rodent-Catchers
In a previous peevish incarnation I spake:
Meself> I agree. Mike *smirk* is not a lakcwit. He's dyslexic. 'Splains lots.
In article <1992Aug14....@wetware.com>, di...@wetware.com (CatWoman )
writes:
CW> Hey! I resent THAT!!! Gives us dyslexis a bad name, y'know!
CW> Geoff! Sic 'em!
Ah, delightful FelineFemale and Foe-of-Rodents, dyslexia's not the problem.
Old Mike *smirk*'s too lackwitted to rise above his dyslexia. It's the
WitlessDyslexia that's the problem
CW> Peeve: I can't think of anything more clever to say.
CW> Dyslexia does strange things to the thought processes
CW> on output, also...
Are you sure it's the input? Maybe it's the mileage. Lookie me, f'rinstance.
Meself> He's prolly also a limpwick. 'Splains more.
CW> Not going to volunteer to find out - have enough
CW> on my hands convincing the PYM that HeteroSeXuality
CW> is NOT a DeathKult!
Actually, Mr. Sybok reminds me a bit of another limpwick on a different
gnuzfroop - a lad from somewhere in the southwest of the USA who spoke with
pedal appendages in oral cavities and then attempted the good old weasel when
caught with trousers around knees. The Kneeling Limpwick. Remember him?
--
Nolan "My eyes are dim / I cannot see" Hinshaw
Internet: no...@twg.com Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197
"If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it
with a computer." David Wittenberg, in Risks Digest 13.70
"Boy, was I in for a dose of reality." Randall K. Abler
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody." Rick Gordon
"Well, first of all, your stance is too wide"
Allan Evans
> all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan (call me Linda)Evans) writes:
Is this your personal fantasy? Sorry, I'm years younger and a different sex.
Oops... I nearly forgot... that sort of thing makes *you* wet.
> > 01s...@ac.dal.ca (Mike) writes:
[A lot of drivel, much of which he seemed to think was *intellegent*. Since
everone now has their dictionaries out, perhaps "deluded" is a good word to
look up.]
> > Mike Quote One:
[An unintended ironic statement]
> >
> > Mike Quote Two:
> >> Mike, the Reigning King of Obtuse
> > ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> >
> > THIS, perhaps, is true irony. (Mike Quote Two)
>
> I think it rather more ironic that I take an obtuse pride in being purposely
> obtuse, don't you, Al?
Well, you've got me there. You certainly excel in obfuscatory remarks. I will
admit though, since you take pride in lacking keenness or quickness in
comprehension, you have succeeded beyond all doubt in accomplishing your goals.
> > I suppose Mike Quote One could be sarcasm... It is true that Mike is
> > *NOT* modest,
>
> GASP! caught! *smirk* (Al, please note: This is sarcasm).
Quoth he.
> >and probably could not smirk secretly as well. However,
> > it is likely that Mike did not know what he was talking about.
>
> Or gee Al, maybe I did, and was being obtuse on purpose. What a neat thought,
> eh? (said with a mixture of sarcasm and irony, for the terminally stupid.)
Please look up the definition of obtuse.
> > I think... it is unlikely that the irony of his signature is apparent
> ^^^^^^^ well, *there's* a shocker.
I can understand why this would shock you. Fear of the unknown.
> this post, you'd think I was Shakespere ( I say "was" instead of "were"
^^^^^^^^^^
Show this to mommy. You may get spanked... don't get too wet now.
> Mike, (Smarter than Al, or just better looking? You be the judge)
Case dismissed. Throw the bozo in the hole.
Al
_______________________________________________________________________________
| Yes, I know my return address is messed up. Petition my sysadmin.......... |
| Allan H. Evans * School of Geography * UNSW * PO Box 1 Kensington 2033 Aust.|
| all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU Remote Sensing and Spatial Information Systems |
CatWoman
] In a previous peevish incarnation I spake:
]
] Meself> I agree. Mike *smirk* is not a lakcwit. He's dyslexic. 'Splains lots.
]
] di...@wetware.com (CatWoman ) writes:
] CW> Hey! I resent THAT!!! Gives us dyslexis a bad name, y'know!
] CW> Geoff! Sic 'em!
]
] Ah, delightful FelineFemale and Foe-of-Rodents, dyslexia's not the problem.
] Old Mike *smirk*'s too lackwitted to rise above his dyslexia. It's the
] WitlessDyslexia that's the problem
Okay, okay...it's backpedaling, but I'll accept it - it's
NOT the dyslexia - it's the witlesness...
But remember - us dyslexics MAY just decide to Untie and
NOT Unite you...
] CW> Peeve: I can't think of anything more clever to say.
] CW> Dyslexia does strange things to the thought processes
] CW> on output, also...
]
] Are you sure it's the input? Maybe it's the mileage. Lookie me, f'rinstance.
Nah - it's been going on since I was in school. My favorite
definition - the brain speaks VM, the eyes speak UNIX, and the
translation program has sector read errors...
Peeve: Being somewhat dyslexic. Manifestation is mainly when
I try to read columns of numbers, since my parents taught me
to read very early. Second most often is learning new things -
the brain goes into an infinite loop and does a panic core
fault if I try to learn something too quickly. Unfortunately
I didn't realize this until just in the last 10 years, so I
have a pattern of thinking I can't learn, rather than a pattern
of HOW to learn...
More peeve: that my parents knew I was having trouble, even if
they weren't sure WHAT, and tried to keep me back a grade - and
the **&%)(*&% school system wouldn't let them, since because I
knew reading (by a method now used to TEACH dyslexics to read),
the school did NOT think I had a problem - just that I was "lazy"
or whatever. So I came to believe they were right - and now
it's a CHORE to learn something new...ARRGH!
] Actually, Mr. Sybok reminds me a bit of another limpwick on a different
] gnuzfroop - a lad from somewhere in the southwest of the USA who spoke with
] pedal appendages in oral cavities and then attempted the good old weasel when
] caught with trousers around knees. The Kneeling Limpwick. Remember him?
Which one? I can think of SEVERAL guys who fit this description,
spanning several different 'froops, but since I don't know their
physical location, I can't place any one in particular...
Diana
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>
>>c) We're usually doing the nasty before I have time to notice any lubrication
>
> tsk, tsk, tsk. how inconsiderate.
>
Mike
Curtis Yarvin
>In article <1992Aug10....@ac.dal.ca> 01s...@ac.dal.ca writes:
>
>Apparently Curtis' description omitted one important feature. Perhaps
>most people wouldn't need to be informed of it, having read the title
>of this newsgroup. This is that the primary function of alt.peeves is
>to discuss that which annoys you.
Roight. I took this for granted, because - of course - the sole
function of conversation is to discuss that which annoys you.
Otherwise it's either boring, banal, or fulsome; either can
be useful for upsetting the digestion of unwanted guests,
but none is worth flaunting in public.
c
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> 01s...@ac.dal.ca (Herman the Hermaphrodite) writes:
>> all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan (call me Linda)Evans) writes:
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> Is this your personal fantasy? Sorry, I'm years younger and a different sex.
> Oops... I nearly forgot... that sort of thing makes *you* wet.
What, attractive women with a personality? You bet.
> [A lot of drivel, much of which he seemed to think was *intellegent*. Since
> everone now has their dictionaries out, perhaps "deluded" is a good word to
> look up.]
Or perhaps "presunptuous".
>> I think it rather more ironic that I take an obtuse pride in being purposely
>> obtuse, don't you, Al?
>
> Well, you've got me there. You certainly excel in obfuscatory remarks. I will
> admit though, since you take pride in lacking keenness or quickness in
> comprehension, you have succeeded beyond all doubt in accomplishing your goals.
>
Well, thank you. I told you it was a obtuse pride.
>> GASP! caught! *smirk* (Al, please note: This is sarcasm).
>
> Quoth he.
>
Well, I know I thought *this* was the best comeback I've seen in a bit.
NAWT.
Forgive me if I'm not slain by your (half) wit.
>
> Please look up the definition of obtuse.
Ok.
Oh, maybe you'd like me to explain. Have trouble with the alphabet, perhaps?
Obtuse:more than 90 degrees and less than 180 degrees.
How's that?
>> > I think... it is unlikely that the irony of his signature is apparent
>> ^^^^^^^ well, *there's* a shocker.
>
> I can understand why this would shock you. Fear of the unknown.
>
What's this, the "I'm rubber and you're glue" school of flamage?
>> this post, you'd think I was Shakespere ( I say "was" instead of "were"
> ^^^^^^^^^^
> Show this to mommy. You may get spanked... don't get too wet now.
>
Thanks. but my dear old Mommy (the English teacher) thinks I'm a pretty good
writer... I don't think spankings would be in the works if I were to show her
this stuff.
>> Mike, (Smarter than Al, or just better looking? You be the judge)
>
> Case dismissed. Throw the bozo in the hole.
>
Ah... so you don't deny either charge? hmm.. Al ol' boy, jealosy will get you
nowhere.
Mike
Allan Evans
> all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan the Ass from Oz) writes:
Very original Mikey
> >> all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan (call me Linda)Evans) writes:
> > ^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> > Is this your personal fantasy? Sorry, I'm years younger and a different sex.
> > Oops... I nearly forgot... that sort of thing makes *you* wet.
>
> What, attractive women with a personality? You bet.
How long have you thought that Linda Evans was not a woman?
> Or perhaps "presunptuous".
This is in *your* dictionary? I realize that you did not realize that
Shakespeare has more than one "a" in it, but believe it or not, I think
you may have trouble finding presunptuous in any dictionary.
> >> GASP! caught! *smirk* (Al, please note: This is sarcasm).
> > Quoth he.
>
> Well, I know I thought *this* was the best comeback I've seen in a bit.
> NAWT.
You certainly exhibit a lack of literary knowledge. Perhaps you should read
a book now and then instead of comic books. Wayne may have a funny world,
but... listen closely... the real world is subtly different.
> > Please look up the definition of obtuse.
> Oh, maybe you'd like me to explain. Have trouble with the alphabet, perhaps?
> Obtuse:more than 90 degrees and less than 180 degrees.
> How's that?
I thought as much. You are looking in the glossary of an Engineering text...
a dictionary is not quite the same thing. Which fraternity are you a member of?
DU's in Alberta tended to take pride in having a vocabulary larger than that
of a centipede, of course many of the Kappa Sigmas used to have trouble spelling
their names.
> >> this post, you'd think I was Shakespere ( I say "was" instead of "were"
> > ^^^^^^^^^^
> > Show this to mommy. You may get spanked... don't get too wet now.
>
> Thanks. but my dear old Mommy (the English teacher) thinks I'm a pretty good
> writer... I don't think spankings would be in the works if I were to show her
> this stuff.
It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury;
Signifying nothing.
-William Shakespeare, Macbeth.
^^^^^^^^^^^^
If your mother thinks *you* are a good writer, the fate of the next generation
is to be literary buffoons.
Elaine Richards
>eloquent, but there you have it.
I dunno, feller. Maybe you should throw a party, drink a lot of
beer, get up on the table and soliloquize and then (after the beer
has moved,uh, southward) piss on a few newsgroups.
ER
--
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I can't help it, I was born sneering."
-Pooh Bah
01s...@ac.dal.ca
> "Guess whoo" from ac.dal.ca writes:
>> all...@earth.gas.unsw.OZ.AU.gas.unsw.OZ.AU (Allan the Ass from Oz) writes:
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> Very original Mikey
>
Why, tahnk you, Al. O *did* think it was several cuts up from that Herman the
Hermaphrodite remark, but I was pretty sure you weren't going to pick that up.
>> What, attractive women with a personality? You bet.
>
> How long have you thought that Linda Evans was not a woman?
I think perhaos you'd better read what I wrote again.
>> Or perhaps "presunptuous".
>
> This is in *your* dictionary? I realize that you did not realize that
> Shakespeare has more than one "a" in it, but believe it or not, I think
> you may have trouble finding presunptuous in any dictionary.
>
Whoops! The editor from hell strikes again. Shakespere spelled his name several
different ways, or so I was taught. Your spelling *is* the most common, but
it isn't the only one around.
>> Well, I know I thought *this* was the best comeback I've seen in a bit.
>> NAWT.
>
> You certainly exhibit a lack of literary knowledge. Perhaps you should read
> a book now and then instead of comic books. Wayne may have a funny world,
> but... listen closely... the real world is subtly different.
Why thank you Al. I do believe that's *the* most pretentious thing I've heard
in a while. Didn't youe mother ever tell you it was beurgois to comment on
somebody's education ?
> I thought as much. You are looking in the glossary of an Engineering text...
> a dictionary is not quite the same thing.
Ah... I guess the words OXFORD CONCISE ENGLISH DICTIONARY are just a clever
ruse, eh?
>Which fraternity are you a member of?
I am a proud member of Phi Delta Theta, thank you.
>
> It is a tale
> Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury;
> Signifying nothing.
>
> -William Shakespeare, Macbeth.
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^
>
> If your mother thinks *you* are a good writer, the fate of the next generation
> is to be literary buffoons.
>
> Al
Why thank you, Al. I'm sure we couldn't survive without pretentious beurgeosie
such as yourself... to make fun of.
Mike
01s...@ac.dal.ca
>
> It is a tale
> Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury;
> Signifying nothing.
>
> -William Shakespeare, Macbeth.
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^
>
Oh, and here's one for ya, Al:
"Lord, what fools these mortals be!"
Shakespere, A Midsummer Night's Dream
Gee look at that. I can be as pretentious as Al. *There's* something to strive
for hm....
Mike
242 lbs before cooking
[ yet another tepid, vapid riposte ]
Stop, sit back and think for a moment, Mikey. Rather than assuring us
each and every clue fired your way missed its mark, why not inform us,
after a barrage, that that nothing successfully completed the synaptic
leap from grey matter to your spinal cord.
Your postings are a lot like the dry heaves: they come far too often,
are quite annoying, and don't even give you the pleasure feeling like
you've accomplished something.
drew
ba...@abingdon.sun.com
--
Nosy
< Oh, and here's one for ya, Al:
< "Lord, what fools these mortals be!"
< Shakespere, A Midsummer Night's Dream
^^^^^^^^^^
Who dat "Shakespere" guy? Is this another of Roger Bacon's
hamhanded imitations?
<Gee look at that. I can be as pretentious as Al.
Sentence fragment. Duh.
<*There's* something to strive
<for hm....
ObPeeve: poorly done citations.