Sink the Earth
Joseph Miller
I think that the only alternative to paving the Earth is to replace all of
the continents with C4 and blowing them up. This would allow the seas to
flow over the entire surface of the earth, and when viewed from space
would cause the planet to resemble a giant saphire, an effect that many
planets can only dream about. In fact I think that this should definitely
be done. You see, paving the earth will require much work to keep the
earth looking nice. Asphalt cracks and fades and that just looks tacky.
Besides, if one were to look at the earth from orbit after it had been
paved, it seem that the entire planet is in mourning. Face it, black is a
depressing color, not like blue that makes people happy. When people see
black the get depressed and think about departed pets. I don't think that
we should torment the citizens of the earth with this. And what about hot
sunny days, that asphalt is going to get extremely hot and make things
feel very uncomfortable. If the earth were under water, then everything
would stay a nice cool temperature, much better for those with high blood
pressure. I ask you to think about this and not to be intimidated by the
flames that we will receive from the col. He's just scared, it happens to
everyone when they are faced with something new and different. It's his
way of protecting himself.
Love ya,
Joe --
--------------> The touch, the feel, the fabric of our lives <--------------
|Joe Miller | "You gotta love any movie where the heroine is |
|jemi...@umr.edu | named Pussy Galore."-Sam Donaldson on Goldfinger |
----------> The touch, the feel of cotton, the fabric of our lives <--------
Michael Heaney
>I think that the only alternative to paving the Earth is to replace all of
>the continents with C4 and blowing them up. This would allow the seas to
>flow over the entire surface of the earth, and when viewed from space
>would cause the planet to resemble a giant saphire, an effect that many
>planets can only dream about. In fact I think that this should definitely
>be done. You see, paving the earth will require much work to keep the
>earth looking nice. Asphalt cracks and fades and that just looks tacky.
>Besides, if one were to look at the earth from orbit after it had been
>paved, it seem that the entire planet is in mourning. Face it, black is a
>depressing color, not like blue that makes people happy. When people see
>black the get depressed and think about departed pets. I don't think that
>we should torment the citizens of the earth with this. And what about hot
>sunny days, that asphalt is going to get extremely hot and make things
>feel very uncomfortable. If the earth were under water, then everything
>would stay a nice cool temperature, much better for those with high blood
>pressure. I ask you to think about this and not to be intimidated by the
>flames that we will receive from the col. He's just scared, it happens to
>everyone when they are faced with something new and different. It's his
>way of protecting himself.
>Love ya,
>Joe --
Of course, you simply haven't thought things through. Where would
we drive? Ah, once that one question is provided, I can see the
realization creep slowly over your face. Enlightenment sometimes takes
a little help, but always, eventually, comes the dawn.
Even now I can hear you saying, as beautiful as a blue earth of
water would be, it is not practicle, and since it has no pavement,
unworthy.
Indeed, black is, in certain instances, a depressing color. But
remember, the population of the planet will be housed underground with the
oceans. They need never set foot on that bleak surface unless their hearts
desire, and they can decorate the under world in any bright and happy
colors they please.
The Amazing Mister Myxlplyk
Holy Sage of Internal Combustion
Benjamin Ketcham
Joseph Miller <jemi...@saucer.cc.umr.edu> wrote:
>
>I think that the only alternative to paving the Earth is to replace all of
>the continents with C4 and blowing them up. This would allow the seas to
>flow over the entire surface of the earth, and when viewed from space
>would cause the planet to resemble a giant saphire, an effect that many
>planets can only dream about.
Interesting idea, but your motivations are all wrong.
>Besides, if one were to look at the earth from orbit after it had been
>paved, it seem that the entire planet is in mourning. Face it, black is a
>depressing color, not like blue that makes people happy. When people see
>black the get depressed and think about departed pets. I don't think that
>we should torment the citizens of the earth with this.
And why not? What is this "happy" crap? Who are you, anyway?
>And what about hot
>sunny days, that asphalt is going to get extremely hot and make things
>feel very uncomfortable.
That's what A/C is for. Honestly, some people just don't think before
they post.
>If the earth were under water, then everything
>would stay a nice cool temperature, much better for those with high blood
>pressure.
Traveling at Mach 0.9 across the ground will be terribLe for those with
high blood pressure. So evolution occurs. What's the problem? We all
win in the long term. This species has been thwarting evolution for
the sake of keeping the weak ones "happy" for too long, and you're a
clear indication of just how bad things are getting because of it.
>Love ya,
>Joe --
Go have a happy day somewhere else.
DAN BAILEY, MSU NUCLEAR WEAPONS TESTING DEPT.
> jemi...@saucer.cc.umr.edu (Joseph Miller) writes:
>
>
>>I think that the only alternative to paving the Earth is to replace all of
>>the continents with C4 and blowing them up. This would allow the seas to
Go join alt.destroy.the.earth, you heathen!
>>flow over the entire surface of the earth, and when viewed from space
>>would cause the planet to resemble a giant saphire, an effect that many
A saphire is a function of Mother Nature, and will be subdued.
>>planets can only dream about. In fact I think that this should definitely
>>be done. You see, paving the earth will require much work to keep the
Nobody cares about your perversions of our dream, heathen.
>>earth looking nice. Asphalt cracks and fades and that just looks tacky.
Asphalt does not look tacky, and we have developed nanotechnology
to deal with cracks and potholes.
>>Besides, if one were to look at the earth from orbit after it had been
>>paved, it seem that the entire planet is in mourning. Face it, black is a
>>depressing color, not like blue that makes people happy. When people see
I think is Psych 1, they mentioned that blue is one of the
depressing colors.
>>black the get depressed and think about departed pets. I don't think that
>>we should torment the citizens of the earth with this. And what about hot
>>sunny days, that asphalt is going to get extremely hot and make things
>>feel very uncomfortable. If the earth were under water, then everything
The asphalt's trapped heat will be used to create steam,
which will push giant turbines to power and heat the under-
ground hydroponics farms.
If the earth were underwater, no alien race would even be
remotely impressed by all this.
>>would stay a nice cool temperature, much better for those with high blood
>>pressure. I ask you to think about this and not to be intimidated by the
>>flames that we will receive from the col. He's just scared, it happens to
>>everyone when they are faced with something new and different. It's his
>>way of protecting himself.
>>Love ya,
>>Joe --
>
> Of course, you simply haven't thought things through. Where would
Of course he hasn't - he's one of those a.d.t.e heathens.
> we drive? Ah, once that one question is provided, I can see the
> realization creep slowly over your face. Enlightenment sometimes takes
> a little help, but always, eventually, comes the dawn.
And some of them will be forced to work in the underground
hydroponics farms, as they will never see the light.
> Even now I can hear you saying, as beautiful as a blue earth of
> water would be, it is not practicle, and since it has no pavement,
> unworthy.
One can hope the heathen bastard has seen the light.
> Indeed, black is, in certain instances, a depressing color. But
Yes, but not in the instance of a paved Earth. I can think of
nothing more beautiful - God, it still brings tears to my eyes,
even to this day. Think of all that smelly, gooey black stuff
existing farther than the eye can see....How beautiful! *sniff*
> remember, the population of the planet will be housed underground with the
> oceans. They need never set foot on that bleak surface unless their hearts
Yes, the oceans will be drained into large artesian wells,
which will be built with 10-megaton Thermonuclear Artesian
Well Creation Systems, donated (unknowningly) by the small
republic of Ukraine.
> desire, and they can decorate the under world in any bright and happy
> colors they please.
Yes, but those who don't want to drive on the pavement are
heathens, and all heathens must be forced to work in the
hydroponics farms until the day they die. They may decorate
their cells any way they so choose, as long as nothing even
remotely resembling Mother Nature shows up anywhere inside
the cell. The only color that may be used to paint the walls
is black - the color of the Holy Asphalt.
>
>
> The Amazing Mister Myxlplyk
> Holy Sage of Internal Combustion
>
This has all been my $0.02 worth for the conversation.
Keep the streetlights burning,
SuperDan, the Junior Lord of the Eternal Asphalt