Funeral of the Hon Mrs Frances Shand Kydd
Michael Rhodes
The funeral of the Hon Mrs Frances Shand Kydd was a very Scottish
affair — with a touch of Roman Catholic grandeur about it.
Fifteen priests, led by their bishop, took part in a Requiem Mass in
St Columba’s Cathedral in Oban for the woman who once lamented
that her daughter’s marriage to the Prince of Wales had exposed
her to a turbulent life of unsought publicity.
'Sometimes, she said, 'I think the only one resting in peace is
Diana.' Yesterday she found her own peace, surrounded by the people of
Argyllshire among whom she had always felt at home, as well as her
children and grandchildren.
With rain clouds piling up over the island of Mull and a stiff west
coast wind, a congregation of more than 200, many of them from the
nearby island of Seil — her home for 32 years, nearly half her
life — joined Prince William, Prince Harry, Earl & Countess
Spencer, Lady Sarah McCorquodale and her husband Neil, Lady Fellowes
and Lord Fellowes, and other family members in the Neo-Gothic
cathedral, which looks out over the Atlantic.
It was a service she herself had chosen and which reflected both her
instinct for informality and her deep Catholic faith. Among those
taking part was Father Roddy Macaulay, from the island of Benbecula,
who had instructed her when she converted to Catholicism. Later he
also conducted the interment.
The tone was relaxed throughout. Christian names only were used on the
order of service and the congregation was given a run through of the
responses with a priest urging: 'Come on, you can do better than
that!' Father Donald MacKay, who conducted the service, said that Mrs
Shand Kydd had seen to every detail in advance. 'This is her
post-mission statement,' he said.
Her grandson, Prince William, read from Paul's Epistle to the Romans,
the modern version, with its stirring conclusion: 'Nothing can come
between us and the love of God.' He did so firmly and well, undaunted
by the dour warnings of the Free Presbyterian Kirk which had condemned
him for taking part in a Catholic service. Later, as the congregation
came forward to take Holy Communion, both princes received a blessing
from a priest.
Three granddaughters, Emily and Celia McCorquodale and the Hon Laura
Fellowes, contributed readings from the Bible, from Pope John's
Journey of a Soul and the Gaelic Blessing which includes the words:
'May the rain fall on your fields, may the road rise up to meet you
and may the Lord hold you in the palm of his hand.'
The eulogy was delivered by Earl Spencer, the brother of Diana,
Princess of Wales, who said that his mother's life had been 'an open
book', that she was 'afraid of nothing and nobody', was 'blessed with
a sharply infectious sense of humour' and that she had 'no time for
self-pity'.
Instead of dwelling on her painful divorce from his father, he
preferred to recall that her marriage to Earl Spencer had been 'a
passionate and happy union', though the death of their young son John
had been 'a crushing blow'.
Equally, despite ill-informed gossip, her subsequent marriage to Peter
Shand Kydd had been 'a loving relationship'.
Inevitably, perhaps, there were those who compared his address with
the defiant 'blood family' message he had delivered at the Princess's
funeral. This, however, was the warm and affectionate tribute of a
son, recalling the idyllic childhood they had enjoyed at Park House in
the grounds of Sandringham and the way in which his mother later had
become an invaluable source of advice for the Princess.
The much reported rift with her daughter, whose premature death meant
that they were never properly reconciled, had been exaggerated. Their
relationship had always been a close one, he said, interrupted only by
the occasional tensions usual in any family. The fact that the
Princess had made her mother executor of her estate and guardian of
her children spoke for itself.
Mrs Shand Kydd had found comfort, he said, in her beautiful house on
Seil, in her friendship with local people and the many charities with
which she became involved. She liked to take a hands-on approach with
her sleeves rolled up.
Her faith, he said, had been an important part of her life. A proudly
independent woman, she had led a 'valiant life, lived to the full'.
As the bishop, the Right Rev Ian Murray, gave his 'final
commendation', holy water was scattered on the coffin before it was
carried out. To the sound of a lone piper her son, daughters and
grandchildren followed. Rarely can members of a British Royal Family
have walked the length of a church with clouds of incense swirling
around them. But that, as many members of the congregation pointed
out, was less a statement of Catholicism than a reminder of Mrs Shand
Kydd’s personality and beliefs.
Among them was Maria Dorrian, a Scot who had travelled from Italy to
attend. She had worked with the Princess and attended her funeral too.
'Really, the two ceremonies were not all that different, she said.
'Both reflected the characters of two wonderful women.'
A group of young people, all wearing yellow shirts to commemorate
pilgrimages they had made to Lourdes with Mrs Shand Kydd, remembered
her sense of humour. 'She was a hoot,' declared Margaret Mitchell.
'Whenever she was around you could be sure that life would be that
little bit more fun.'
As we emerged into a rainswept afternoon the Caledonian MacBrayne
ferry to Mull was pulling out of Oban harbour — a trip that Mrs
Shand Kydd made many times. She once said that her daughter's funeral
had been 'probably the proudest day of my life as a mother'. She would
have been equally proud yesterday of the tributes paid by her family,
the way her Church had conducted itself and the wave of affection from
those she knew and loved so well.
Waterlou4
Overkill.