Re: Midget [Joke] Spotted
St. Jackanapes
In buh.shit Sir Obi ~ Sigzilla o? OOTIKOF barfed this out...
>
> ~ any buddy from texas ??
>
> Group: alt.discuss.katzenjammer
> Date: Thu, Jun 19, 2008, 6:41am (MDT+2)
> From: o2B...@webtv.net (o2BnPJs)
>
> The flight was coming into Dallas when a combination of mechanical
> errors and unstable weather caused the plane to start plummeting to the
> ground!
>
> The pilot feverishly worked his controls, and finally, the engines
> roared back to life in time to prevent the plane from going splat on the
> ground!
>
> As the plane landed, airport officials rushed to the disembarking gate
> and were stunned to see 200 midgets shakily get off the plane.
>
> Finally the crew got off the plane and the local manager of the airline
> came up to congratulate him on his perseverance under extreme odds.
>
> As the official and the pilot were talking, the official commented how
> unusual it was that there were so many midgets on the flight.
>
> "Those weren't midgets," the pilot replied.
> "Those were Texans with all the shit scared out of them!"
Now *that* was fucking funny! I hate Texans. I couldn't have cared less
about them until that goddamn fucking retard W got into office.
--
St. Jackanapes
http://www.jackanapes.ws
===========================================================
"Where knowledge ends, religion begins." - Benjamin Disraeli
-----------------------------------------------------------
VISIT DR. CHUNG'S CAT HOUSE: http://tinyurl.com/39gbog
Father Haskell
> In buh.shit Sir Obi ~ Sigzilla o? OOTIKOF barfed this out...
>
>
>
>
>
> > ~ any buddy from texas ??
>
> > Group: alt.discuss.katzenjammer
> > Date: Thu, Jun 19, 2008, 6:41am (MDT+2)
>
> > The flight was coming into Dallas when a combination of mechanical
> > errors and unstable weather caused the plane to start plummeting to the
> > ground!
>
> > The pilot feverishly worked his controls, and finally, the engines
> > roared back to life in time to prevent the plane from going splat on the
> > ground!
>
> > As the plane landed, airport officials rushed to the disembarking gate
> > and were stunned to see 200 midgets shakily get off the plane.
>
> > Finally the crew got off the plane and the local manager of the airline
> > came up to congratulate him on his perseverance under extreme odds.
>
> > As the official and the pilot were talking, the official commented how
> > unusual it was that there were so many midgets on the flight.
>
> > "Those weren't midgets," the pilot replied.
> > "Those were Texans with all the shit scared out of them!"
>
> Now *that* was fucking funny! I hate Texans. I couldn't have cared less
> about them until that goddamn fucking retard W got into office.
Bush is a Connecticut carpetbagger. A bowl of
real Texas red would kill him; even the Minnesota
version of chili would make his asshole burn like
a Bessemer furnace.
St. Jackanapes
In alt.flame.jesus.christ Father Haskell barfed this out...
I thought their Texas accents sounded fake!
Now this what a *real* Texan sounds like:
http://www.jackanapes.ws/mp3/jewslikejesus.mp3
Father Haskell
And much better mannered. Met Kinky at a book signing.
Gave me a silkscreened Kinky Friedman "snot rag"
(American flag with 50 Mogen Davids replacing the stars)
and autographed my copy of Sold American.
St. Jackanapes
In alt.flame.jesus.christ, Father Haskell spake thusly...
Uber cool! I'm sure that I've heard of him in my crowded, cluttered, and
very stoned past. But when my Austrian friend I+E+D posted that MP3 in
AFJC for me a couple of weeks ago, it was like I'd never heard of Kinky.
And just a couple of weeks ago Kinky Friedman was a guest "interviewee"
or whatever MSNBC calls the "Liberal" press and politicos it calls up to
comment on recent events with Keith Olberman. Unfortunetly I had to
leave on a gallon vodka run before 10:00 PM closing time - and missed
his bit.
Father Haskell
"Sold American" contains at least two of Kinky's most
offensive pieces, including "Get Your Biscuits in the Oven
and Your Buns in the Bed" and "The Ballad of Charles
Whitman." I was playing that particular album into
the ground when my fellow high school students
were playing the Grateful Dead and Fleetwood Mac
into the ground.
Ensign Lord Admiral Robert T. Chatterton
Ewww...Greatful Dead & Fleetwood Mac? What year was this? 1981?
--
Ensign Lord Admiral Robert T. Chatterton,
- the Queen's Master of the High and Salty Seas
----------------------------------------------------------------
http://www.jackanapes.ws / http://www.royal-navy.mod.uk/
===========================================================
"Where knowledge ends, religion begins." - Benjamin Disraeli
-----------------------------------------------------------
VISIT DR. CHUNG'S CAT HOUSE FOR LUNCH: http://tinyurl.com/39gbog
Father Haskell
1979. The bands' respective current albums for that
year were "Terrapin Station" and "Rumors." Both
efforts were indications that the bands were a decade
past their creative primes. Everyone despised punk,
for some reason, even if no one had ever heard it.
Unknown
Rumors? <gag!> I was attending art college that year. I was older than
most of the students, so when I went to their parties they kept me up to
date on the latest punk & early New Wave bands. I was still playing the
shit out of my copy of Tull's "Too Old to Rock 'n' Roll: Too Young to
Die!" that was released in 76, and bemoaning the lack of good music.
After 1974 the music scene pretty much turned to shit on the radio. From
'68 to '74 you didn't need a stereo cassette or 8 track in your car -
the radio played music that you liked. The mid-70's just sucked - there
were a few bright moments, Pink Floyd's The Wall, but until the '80's
the music world was dead. I guess the drugs finally burnt everyone out.
Then along came the floods of cocaine and creativity exploded again.
Now, since the 80s' scene died out when everyone went to rehab, music is
worse than ever. Hip-Hop? Gimme a break - it's the same damn song with
different words. There's been a serious creativity void, and Hollywood
has gone all fucking corporate - they want to create stars out of faces
& dancers - and have ignored the singer-songwriters that was their bread
& butter since the industry began. Yet those fucking assholes cannot
figure out why music sales has gone through the floor - they blame it on
P2P - that ain't it. It's because there ain't shit worth spending money
on today. If there were I might spend money on it.
</rant>
--
Ensign Lord Admiral Robert T. Chatterton, The African Explorer
and the Queen's Master of the High and Salty Seas