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“The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down” to be Deleted

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John Albert

Aug 18, 2017, 9:25:01 PM8/18/17
“The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down” to be Deleted

It’s news that will lift very many hearts in these
challenging and turbulent times. Robbie Robertson has
announced that the song, “The Night They Drove Old Dixie
Down,” first recorded and released by The Band in 1969, will
be banned from all future sale, in whatever form. The
original master tapes of all of The Band’s performances of
it are to be destroyed. There will be no further publishing
rights granted to any artist under any circumstances.
Although it will take some time, the song is to be erased,
as if it never existed in the first place.

This is a great thing, because there’s no justification for
this kind of drivel any more. America is finally growing up.
We know now that there can be no sympathy for any individual
caught in the waves of history, trying in his flawed way to
do his best and make his way through it with some shred of
humanity intact. We know that we must squarely acknowledge
only what is worst in that person, only those things about
which he was mistaken, and we need to rip down the memory of
anything redeemable about him, and, to the extent
practically possible, we are morally obliged to defile his
grave. “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down” had always
seemed to me to be a song that brought people together in
empathy for those caught in a whirlwind of war and politics
and destruction, crying out in a very particular white
Southern voice but one all the more believable for its
specificity to time and place, and one that could touch the
heartstrings of those from entirely alien backgrounds.

Today, of-course, it would just make you want to throw up.

We’re better than that now, and we’re getting better and
better each and every day and in every way. Long live our
new, budding world of universal understanding. Peace is
finally coming. Why did it take so long to arrive?

The deletions are progressing, but there’s still one or two
versions of this song out on YouTube at the time of writing.
Watch and listen below if you want a reminder of how sick
things used to be. But forgive me if I pass, and hold on to
your stomach.

DISCLAIMER: This post is satirical (at the time of writing).
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