Funnies
ShiraBWild
what’s the difference between a roadie and a homeless person?
the laminate
How do you get a drummer off of your porch?
Pay him for the pizza!
Q: How many punks does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None: punks cant change a thing.
Q: How many folk musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One to screw it in, the rest to complain that its electric.
Q: How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Ten: One to screw it in and nine to watch his back.
Q: What's tragic about 4 ravers driving off a cliff in a Honda Civic?
A: The car seats five.
Due to a mix-up on Grammy night, Madonna, Britney Spears and Christina
Aguilerra are forced to share a private jet in order to arrive in time for the
ceremony.Once up in the air, Madonna pulls out a $1000 bill and says "I'm going
to throw this $1000 bill out the window and make someone down below very
happy."Not to be outdone, Britney ripped $1000 bill in half and threw it out
the window, saying, "Look, I just made two people really happy."Not even
noticing Britney's stupid move, Christina bragged, "Look, I'm going to throw
1000 $1 bills and make a lot more people a little happier."At this point the
pilot, who has overheard all this bragging and can't stand it anymore, comes
out and says, "I think I'll throw all three of you out of this plane and make
250 million people happy."
What's the difference between one of Saddam Hussein's palaces, and a rap star's
house?
You know you're going to find weapons in a rap star's house.
What does a stripper do with her asshole before she goes to work?
Drops him off at band practice.
What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman?
The Rolling Stones sing "Hey, You, Get Off Of My Cloud"
A Scotsman shouts "Hey, McCloud, Get Off Of My Ewe"
If a guitarist, a singer, and drummer are riding in a car, who's doing the
driving?
The police officer.
Why does a guitarist keep a package of strings on his dashboard?
So that he can use the handicap parking space.
what’s the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy?
the puppy eventually stops whining and grows up.
how many entertainment lawyers does is take to tile a bathroom?
one, but you have to slice him very thin
A: How can you tell if a singer is at the door?
A: Because he can't find the key and doesn't know when to come in.
Q: What do you call the third guitarist in a band?
A: The new bass player.
Q: How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None - they have machines to do that now.
Q: How many singers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One - he just stands there while the world revolves around him.
Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 10. One to do it and nine to say "I could do that."
Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one, but the guitarist has to show him how first.
What do you call a building full of guitarists?
Jail.
What do you call a guitarist with no girlfriend?
Homeless.
Q: Why do drummers leave their drumsticks on their dashboard?
A: so they can park in handicapped spaces.
Q: what do you call a guy that hangs out with a bunch of musicians?
A: a drummer
Q: What do you call a beautiful woman on a drummer's arm?
A: A tattoo
Q: What's the difference between a guitar player and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four.
What does a guitar player do when he locks his keys in the car?
He breaks the window to get the bass player out.
What are the three rules of rock drumming?
1. Fingerless gloves... sure.
2. Shirtless... maybe.
3. Fingerless gloves and shirtless... no.
How do you know if a drummer's broken into your house?
He's still there when you get home
Q: What do you call a drummer in a 3-piece suit?
A: The defendant.
What do you call a guitar player that only knows two chords?
A music critic
"Yes! Melnicks!!!"
Richard
Q: What do you say to a roadies girlfriend?
A: No... I don't know 'WHO YOU ARE'.
Alfred N
N.A.D.H.
hg
hmm
Kar
>Fron the Rope:
<snip>
Funny!
>Q: How many singers does it take to change a light bulb?
>A: One - he just stands there while the world revolves around him.
Kar
hc
Kar
>> Funny!
>>
>> >Q: How many singers does it take to change a light bulb?
>> >A: One - he just stands there while the world revolves around him.
>>
>>
>> Kar
>
>No, it's not.
>
>hc
Yes, it is.
Kar