Need info/lyrics for Big Fat Sissy Irvin, 42nd fastest gun

[Robert F. Monroe]

In article <19970523040...@ladder01.news.aol.com>, ALYingst
<alyi...@aol.com> writes
>Please help me find anything about an old comic song about a gunfighter,
>Big Fat Sissy Irvin, who was the 42nd fastest gun in the west. Is there a
>good site to search for this info?

I am sorry to say that I don't have the lyrics (I have been looking for
them for quite some time myself). The name of the song is _The Ballad Of
Irving_ and I believe that Irving was actually the 142nd fastest gun in
the west. As I recall, Irving's life was heavily influenced by his
Jewish mother. If anyone can can up with the lyrics I would be greatly
appreciative as well. It must have come out around 1965 to 1967.

Come to think of it, I do believe that I can recall the final verse:

"Finally Irving caught three slugs in the belly,
It was right outside the Frontier Deli.
He was standing there twirling his gun around,
And butter-fingers Irving gunned himself down."

It is a great song and I can't even remember who wrote it or sang it.
That's the best I can offer. I hope that someone can come up with the
whole thing.

Bob.
--
Robert F. Monroe

[Childuf60s]

OK, this is the song you're looking for.

"The Ballad of Irving" - Frank Gallop
available on LP "When You're In Love, The Whole World Is Jewish",
originally
released on Kapp Records KRL-4506 in 1966, but re-released in 1993 on
Rhino
Records CD/CS 71084, paired with "You Don't Have To Be Jewish".
also released as a single, 1966.
also available on"Dr. Demento's 20th Anniversary Collection", Rhino
Records
CD/CS 70743, 1991.

He was short and fat, and rode out of the West
With a Mogen David on his silver vest.
He was mean and nasty right clear through,
Which was kinda weird, 'cause he was yellow too.
They called him Irving.
Big Irving.
Big, short Irving.
Big, short, fat Irving.
The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
He came from the old Bar Mitzvah spread,
With a 10-gallon yarmulke on his head.* [see below]
He always followed his mother's wishes,
Even on the range he used two sets of dishes.
Irving.
Big, fat Irving.
Big sissy Irving.
The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
A hundred and forty-one could draw faster than he,
But Irving was looking for one forty-three.
Walked into Sol's Saloon like a man insane,
And ordered three fingers of two cents plain.
Irving.
Big, fat Irving.
Big sport Irving.
The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
----------------
[The following lines were edited out of the original release, and are only
in
the version available on Dr. Demento's 20th Anniversary Collection.]
One day Bad Max happened into town.
His aim was to shoot fat Irving down.
Bad Max said, "Draw, and draw right now!"
And Irving drew, drew a picture of a cow.
Irving.
Big, fat Irving.
Big gunfighter Irving.
The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
----------------
The James Boys was comin' on a train at first sun,
And the town said, "Irving, we need your gun."
When that train pulled in at the break of dawn,
Irving's gun was there, but Irving was gone.
Irving.
Big, fat Irving.
Big help, Irving.
The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
Well, finally Irving got three slugs in the belly.

It was right outside the Frontier Deli.

He was sittin' there twirlin' his gun around,
And butterfingers Irving gunned himself down!
Irving.
Big, fat Irving.
Big dum-dum Irving.
Big dum-dum dead Irving.
The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
Really.
*The line about the 10-gallon yarmulke was on the original LP, but the
single
version and subsequent LP pressings substituted the line:
Schlepping a salami and pumpernickel bread.
This substitution was made because the record company felt the joke would
be
lost on non-Jewish listeners.

[CatHeadRec]

Sorry, I got the wrong artist on my previous post. I was thinking about a
different demented song.
Lisa
Cat Head Records
Vinyl and 78 Search Service
Visit Cat Head on the web - http://members.aol.com/CatHeadRec/index.htm e-mail - CatHe...@aol.com

a little bit of uh-huh, a whole lot of oh yeah....

[heils]

Robert F. Monroe wrote:
>
> In article <19970523040...@ladder01.news.aol.com>, ALYingst
> <alyi...@aol.com> writes
> >Please help me find anything about an old comic song about a gunfighter,
> >Big Fat Sissy Irvin, who was the 42nd fastest gun in the west. Is there a
> >good site to search for this info?
>
> I am sorry to say that I don't have the lyrics (I have been looking for
> them for quite some time myself). The name of the song is _The Ballad Of
> Irving_ and I believe that Irving was actually the 142nd fastest gun in
> the west. As I recall, Irving's life was heavily influenced by his
> Jewish mother. If anyone can can up with the lyrics I would be greatly
> appreciative as well. It must have come out around 1965 to 1967.

I hope this helps.
- Claire

"The Son Of Irving" - Frank Gallop
available on LP _Would You Believe--Frank Gallop Sings?_ on Musicor Records,
MM-2110 (mono), c1966.

You remember how Irving got three slugs in the belly?
How it happened outside the Frontier Deli?
How he lived by his gun and died by his gun?
Well, no one knew fat Irving had a son,

Named Seymour.
Tall, slim Seymour.
Tall, slim, excellent-looking Seymour.
Son of the hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.

He had steamy eyes and stood six-foot four.
When he walked in the bar, he filled the door.
He had a gun in one hand, and the folks would stare,
'Cause in his other hand, he had a teddy bear.

Seymour.
Tall, sissy Seymour.
Tall, excellent-looking, sissy Seymour.
Son of the hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.

Seymour was dressed in boots magenta,
By his mother, Esther, a dance hall yente.
She had one goal, and he never mocked her.
She dreamed he'd marry a lady doctor.

Seymour.
Momma's boy Seymour.
Excellent-looking, big baby Seymour.
Son of the hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.

One day Seymour rode into town,
Billy the Kid was waitin' to shoot him down.
Seymour disguised himself in a dress and bustle,
And rode out of town as Lillian Russell.

Seymour.
Side-saddled Seymour.
Tall, really excellent-looking Seymour.
Son of the hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.

But then Seymour made Bad Max a dare.
There stood Seymour, one hand on his gun and one on his teddy bear.
But Bad Max shot Seymour down in the high noon sun.
Stupid Seymour had drawn his teddy, and hugged his gun.

Seymour.
Mortally wounded Seymour.
Not so excellent-looking Seymour.
Dead, dum-dum Seymour.
Truly, the son of the hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.
Really.