The Porky Page
exp(j*pi/2)
Rieves. The Porky Page can presently be accessed at
http://www.azwebpages.com/porky.htm.
Just in case Jim Carr decides to remove The Porky Page from his website
(for whatever reason), I am posting it here, ver batim (direct
copy/paste) for the Google record and for future reference.
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The Porky Page!
Purpose:
To keep the signal to noise ratio in in alt.music.home-studio to a
bearable level. Responding with a link to this page will help avoid
flame wars with Porky.
What's wrong with Porky?
Who knows? What you need to know is that before Porky arrived in the
newsgroup, there were 400-500 messages per month. In the period from
March 8 through April 8, 2004, there were over 2,000 posts! And guess
what? Porky wrote 1/3 of them (650). Whether you like him or not, is
presence has adversely affected the group.
Should I listen to what he says?
That's up to you. If the topic is one of opinion, treat his opinion
like you would any other. If he's offering suggestions about mixing, he
sounds like he might know what he's talking about. You can hear some of
his own work at the following links. If you like what he does with his
own stuff, his advice might be useful.
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/7/madmikemusic.htm
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/4/eightinchpeanutsmusic.htm
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/3/metalicdreamsmusic.htm
When it comes to facts, however, Porky is well intentioned, but often
inaccurate. Worst of all, he doesn't like being corrected, which is the
main reason this page exists. I got tired of arguing with him or
watching others argue with him when he was clearly wrong. He claims as
facts things he simply doesn't know. He's not one to write, "I heard
that..." - he writes, "Such and such is the case."
He's also a known liar. Porky is the third identity he's used in this
newsgroup. He originally arrived as Einstein. All was going well until
he started misinforming people about how a compressor works. Several of
us stepped in to correct him. In his paranoia he thought we were
picking on him because of his name, so he changed it to Hakwins Johnson
Becket Hood without telling anyone.
When folks still argued with him, he changed it to Porky, then began
posting messages as a defender of Hawkins. He was pretending to be
somebody else to bolster his arguments. Kinda creepy if you ask me. I
caught on to him and exposed him (http://tinyurl.com/2eyu2), but he
repeatedly lied about it and attacked me. Fortunately, he got caught in
his own lies and finally owned up to it.
So, take what he says with a grain of salt.
Why did you go to the trouble of making this page?
Seems weird, huh? I'm trying to learn mixing. I thought this newsgroup
was great until Porky arrived. I got sick of the arguing and the 20+
messages per day he posted. So did a lot of other people. Many of us
don't want to leave his inaccurate statements out there uncorrected,
yet we don't want to argue. I figure this page might help us avoid
protracted arguments.
I think if we can post a link to a third party explaining the correct
information and a link to this page, maybe we can reduce the noise.
Since I own my own domain and can type very fast, putting together this
page took less than an hour. I've spent more time than that arguing
with Porky in one afternoon!
Update - 2 August 2004
Porky promised to leave the newsgroup (end of May) if I took this web
page down (this was right after he falsely accused me of using someone
else's MIDI file and claiming it was me actually playing an electric
bass). He made the offer to leave, not me. I agreed and took down the
page. Did he leave? Well, not exactly. He started posting under a new
alias, Captain Midnight. I called him on it via personal e-mail. He
stopped using that alias, but now he's back as Porky again. So much for
being a man of his word. When I told I would put up this site again, he
swore he would sue me for libel, violating his first amendment rights,
Internet stalking, and some other stuff that made me laugh. I sent him
my real name and address so his lawyer can contact me. I think the guy
is nuts, but what do I know? I made this page, so I guess that makes me
nuts, too!
Porky Highlights
The following are some highlights on Porky lest you think my claims are
unfounded:
Porky on Compression
He wrote, "A compressor's function is pretty much the opposite [of a
limiter], When the signal drops below a certain predetermined trigger
level the gain is increased proportionately to the drop in level, so
that low level signals are amplified more." (http://tinyurl.com/2r5fx
83 articles in this thread alone, plus countless other threads on the
same topic). That's so wrong it's laughable. You can read the thread to
see how Porky was providing a "simple, holistic explanation" that
"omitted the compensatory gain circuit" blah blah. This link explains
compression correctly:
http://www.soundinstitute.com/article_detail.cfm/ID/121
Porky on his Credentials
"[I] have over thirty five years in electronics, I have built my own
compressor/limitors, including tube type optical, LED optical
transistor and IC, and FET IC types. I've been in and around studios
for over thirty years. including Muscle Shoals Sound, Fame Studios and
Broadway Studios in the Tri-cities area in Alabama, MCA Studios in
Nashville and Tree Studios before it was Sony Tree."
In reality, Porky played in a band for a while in the '70s, served a
couple of years around 1968 in the Army doing electronics, then by his
own admission did nothing with music for at least 20 years
(http://tinyurl.com/ypw2l). There's nothing wrong with his experience,
but it certainly doesn't match his claims.
Porky on Sound Absorption
"To absorb low frequencies [use a] very dense material such as lead,
which doesn't reflect low frequencies back into the room."
(http://tinyurl.com/29cn3 37 articles in this thread)
Common sense tells you that dense materials reflect sounds, which is
why foam is used to absorb sound. Lead will keep sounds out by
refelecting them.
He referred to the phrase "adiabatic to isothermal conversion" in an
attempt to bluster his way out of the argument. There is no such
phrase. Adiabatic versus isothermal conversion is used when discussing
why using foam inside of an enclosed speaker cabinet can make it seem
bigger (http://www.lungster.com/l/speakers/BassListArchive.html#t1)
If you're interested in sound absorption, check out
http://www.auralex.com for information on acoustic foam.
Porky on Copyright Law
"You CANNOT get a mechanical (or any other) license without the
copyright owner's permission. Period!!" (http://tinyurl.com/3a4xw 121
articles in this flame fest). Too bad he's wrong!
The Harry Fox Agency, who handles this stuff, says, "once a copyright
owner has recorded and distributed such a work to the U.S. public or
permitted another to do so, a compulsory mechanical license is
available to anyone else who wants to record and distribute the work in
the U.S. upon the payment of license fees." See
http://www.harryfox.com/mechanical.html for more details.
Porky on using Audition
"There is no provision for the use of DirectX or VST plugins."
(http://tinyurl.com/2955s - 175 articles!!)
He couldn't be more wrong. See
http://www.adobe.com/products/audition/main.html for more details. At
least Porky admitted to being wrong about this one, but it's just
another example of how he states things as fact without knowing what
he's talking about.
Porky on Clarinets and Saxophones
"The material has more to do with the sound than the bore."
(http://tinyurl.com/2u485 37 articles)
Once again he states as fact what he simply does not know. Check out
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saxophone. They say, "the material from
which it is made has less bearing on the sound quality produced than
the method by which the sound is produced."
Porky on Guitar Pickups
Here he claims that a pickup reacts to mechanical vibration. I simply
pointed out that it reacts to movement in the magnetic field. He
couldn't accept that clarification and freaked out. He ended up
writing, "It reacts to the mecahnical vibration of a conductor"
(http://tinyurl.com/yq6jt 173 articles!!) which is simply wrong. It
needs something that is magnetic (reacts to a magnet). Water is a
conductor, but it won't make a pickup work.
Again, it's just him being argumentative and imprecise.
Porky on Spelling
He was teased about spelling diaphragm as diaphram. He refused to
accept that not a single dictionary listed his spelling as an alternate
spelling (http://tinyurl.com/2o6ls). He cited a Japanese site as proof
that his spelling is correct.
Typos are normal and accepted. When he got teased about his "typos" he
freaked, then refused to admit he was wrong!
So, when a guy refuses to accept eight different dictionaries as the
voice of authority, people like me make web pages like this to avoid
getting into protracted arguments.
Want to add your own comments? Try the Guestbook!
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