New Preparation X in the works

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Skip Elsheimer

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Aug 31, 1999, 3:00:00 AM8/31/99
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So finally I'm gathering together stuff for the next issue of Preparation X.

This next issue's theme is "Food, Folks and Fun".

Here's what I'm looking for (your writing assignment)…

FOOD SERVANT STORIES - as a waiter, waitress or food delivery person you
deal with the human animal and its most primitive instinct. What are some
stories about obnoxious, sub-humans that you've served?

THIS SHIT TASTES LIKE FOOD - Everything on the planet has a taste (except
for your tongue). In Stay Free, I asked people to describe what sexual
fluids tasted like. Now I want to know what all the body parts (hair, skin,
poop, sweat, etc.) taste like. What's the food parallel? These taste
descriptions will be anonymous, so fess up.

SECRET RECIPE POLITICS - Recipes are an odd commodity passed down from
generation to generation, transcribed by hand from index card to index card.
Secret family recipes often involve weird family politics. Let's hear your's
and we'd love to get the recipe too…

FOOD RITUALS/HANGUPS - Can't let food touch on the plate? I want to hear
about it and what happens when it does touch. How about chewing rituals?
Humans ritualize everything else they do, so let's here yours. The stories
can be anonymous if you wish.

FAKE MEAT RECIPES - I love fake meat almost as much as the real thing. Let's
share some delicious recipes. My challenge (if anyone else wishes to conquer
it) is to make a vegetarian McRib.

EXOTIC FOOD EXPERIENCES - stories of eating beyond the realm of the Western
palate - a diet things that may be considered pets, pests or pretty
decorations in the U.S.

GROCERY STORE SHENANIGANS - these 24 hour food oasis's are perfect hangouts
for things besides buying food. Let's here of what you do and what you've
seen others do.

ORPHANED FOOD - you used to crave it, but now you moved or they don't make
it anymore. What is it and how do you cope?

SCHOOL CAFETERIA CONFIDENTIAL - this is where the real education takes
place. Bartering food, weird social strafication, gross out contests.

If you have any other great theme-related stories, please pass them along.

The deadline is the Monday, Sept 27th. I hope to have the issue out in
October.

Thanks for your help.

Skip
Prep X guy
sk...@avgeeks.com

Philip Ayers

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Sep 1, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/1/99
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Skip-
I'm thinkn' yer on to something here. This could be hot information people
are dying to have, I am. Is _Preperation H..X?_ one of those webzines
.....or is it the old fashion kind? Eitherway where & when can I get
mine?

Flip
In article <37cc...@news2.mixcom.com>, "Skip Elsheimer"

Skip Elsheimer

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Sep 1, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/1/99
to
It's the old fashioned kind - ink on paper.

I do have a website - www.prepx.com - but it's sorely in need of being
updated.

I usually put them out at record stores, bookstores, clubs, etc. Check the
Internationalist.

Skip


Philip Ayers <p.a...@mindspring.com> wrote in message
news:p.ayers-0109...@pppa8-resaleprinceton1-4r1060.saturn.bbn.com..
.


> Skip-
> I'm thinkn' yer on to something here. This could be hot information people
> are dying to have, I am. Is _Preperation H..X?_ one of those webzines
> .....or is it the old fashion kind? Eitherway where & when can I get
> mine?
>
> Flip
> In article <37cc...@news2.mixcom.com>, "Skip Elsheimer"
> <sk...@alienskin.com> wrote:
>
> > So finally I'm gathering together stuff for the next issue of
Preparation X.
> >
> > This next issue's theme is "Food, Folks and Fun".
> >

> > Here's what I'm looking for (your writing assignment).


> >
> > FOOD SERVANT STORIES - as a waiter, waitress or food delivery person you
> > deal with the human animal and its most primitive instinct. What are
some
> > stories about obnoxious, sub-humans that you've served?
> >
> > THIS SHIT TASTES LIKE FOOD - Everything on the planet has a taste
(except
> > for your tongue). In Stay Free, I asked people to describe what sexual
> > fluids tasted like. Now I want to know what all the body parts (hair,
skin,
> > poop, sweat, etc.) taste like. What's the food parallel? These taste
> > descriptions will be anonymous, so fess up.
> >
> > SECRET RECIPE POLITICS - Recipes are an odd commodity passed down from
> > generation to generation, transcribed by hand from index card to index
card.
> > Secret family recipes often involve weird family politics. Let's hear
your's

> > and we'd love to get the recipe too.

Philip Ayers

unread,
Sep 1, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/1/99
to
Skip -
This is absoluply the Ritz! I want to be your friend! I have lots...well
not "lots", but a few...well one friend whoo would also want to be knowing
about this zine you do. If Preperation X were a journal I would like to
submit an article. Do you consider outside articles for this publication?
Oh well, ...such fun, oblique and strange. Love the scatological stuff
too.
I would contribute. Let me know.
Flip
In article <37cd...@news2.mixcom.com>, "Skip Elsheimer"

kevin...@my-deja.com

unread,
Sep 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/2/99
to
Skip, and all at PrepX, thanks for the great work.

Thought you may be interested in this
http://news.excite.com/news/r/990902/07/odd-life-logos article about
logos and products being banned from California School Textbooks.

- Kevin Darbro
http://www.wickedwitchproject.com
http://www.intrex.net/kdarbro
--
"To be and not to be, that is the answer."


Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Share what you know. Learn what you don't.

Dave Schall

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Sep 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/2/99
to
This may prove to be fun so . . . Here it goes.


> THIS SHIT TASTES LIKE FOOD -

I've never eaten shit but I have a weird (or maybe not so weird) association of
Indian food, with body odor. So could sweat taste like maybe say - curry
chicken? Also bamboo shoots taste like toilet water smells to me. Again, could
the reverse be true? Somebody want to test these hypotheses and let Skip know?


> My challenge (if anyone else wishes to conquer
> it) is to make a vegetarian McRib.

*There's currently meat in those?*

>
> GROCERY STORE SHENANIGANS - these 24 hour food oasis's are perfect hangouts
> for things besides buying food. Let's here of what you do and what you've
> seen others do.

Riding the pony. It only cost a quarter (sometimes less depending on location)
- how could I not? Giddy-up. Picture this 6'-4" man riding 2'-3" plastic pony.
Hmmm.

>
>
> ORPHANED FOOD - you used to crave it, but now you moved or they don't make
> it anymore. What is it and how do you cope?

Two things:

I miss Krystal Burgers - the Southern equivalent to White Castles - little mini
grease bombs that are only good at 3am after a night in the bars - only they
don't have them here for some reason! What's a drunk to do? Solution - buy
about two dozen of them when I'm home with the folks in Tennessee, freeze the
little suckers and thaw them in the microwave when on a bender. You can't make
them any worse so this is perfectly acceptable procedure.

Also orphaned - hickory smoked -spicy tomato sauce based BB-Q (not that local
vinegar stuff or the icky sweet texas style stuff). Its not that I won't eat
the vinegar stuff, its that the tomato stuff is better! Sorry - I don't mean to
start the old vinegar / tomato sauce debate but that's just the way I feel and
you can't change my mind!

Solution - Eat at Ott's, Buddy's, or Calhoun's BBQ in TN when home.

(Note: Its a little out of the way but seeking out Ott's is highly recomended
when ever Knoxville)

>
>
> SCHOOL CAFETERIA CONFIDENTIAL - this is where the real education takes
> place. Bartering food, weird social strafication, gross out contests.

I will never get over Jimmy Arnwine barfing up his peas in lunch in the second
grade. Scarred for life I am.

> weird social stratification

In eight grade we were assigned seats in lunch. Forced to sit together, myself
and the four other guys at my table formed a strong bond over the year, causing
all kinds of trouble, playing truth and dare and just generally acting like
obnoxious early-teen boys. The next year we all went to highschool and never
spoke again. They all turned into football / basketball jocks and I was the
nerdy punk skater kid they all loved to hate. Weird. I spent the next 4 years
trying to figure it all out. Then thankfull college came or I would have gone
nuts.

>
>
> If you have any other great theme-related stories, please pass them along.

OBLIGATORY LOCAL MUSIC CONTENT: Recently, Mark Sloop (Slobs, etc.) was seen
shooting Wesson Oil at a party on Oak St.. In his state he apparently thought
it was liquor. Later a pair of soiled underpants turned up in the bathroom
trash can. He didn't fess up but I have my suspicions.

That is all I care to share. Perhaps I've shared too much, perhaps not enough.

Later, Dave Schall.

PS: Still looking for bagpipe player for a recording. Any out there?

James Hepler

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Sep 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/2/99
to

Dave Schall wrote:

> > ORPHANED FOOD - you used to crave it, but now you moved or they don't make
> > it anymore. What is it and how do you cope?
>
> Two things:
>
> I miss Krystal Burgers - the Southern equivalent to White Castles - little mini
> grease bombs that are only good at 3am after a night in the bars - only they
> don't have them here for some reason! What's a drunk to do? Solution - buy
> about two dozen of them when I'm home with the folks in Tennessee, freeze the
> little suckers and thaw them in the microwave when on a bender. You can't make
> them any worse so this is perfectly acceptable procedure.

Or you could go to Harris Teeter and buy either White Castle Hamburgers
or White Castle Cheeseburgers.

I'm still not sure if I want to mention scrapple and how we make it.
*ugh*

James Hepler

Skip Elsheimer

unread,
Sep 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/2/99
to
I do publish outside stories, but I like to keep the stories on topic
(unless they're really really good).

See below for a list of submission topics.

Skip


Philip Ayers <p.a...@mindspring.com> wrote in message

news:p.ayers-0109...@pppa23-resaleprinceton1-4r1060.saturn.bbn.com.
..

> > > > share some delicious recipes. My challenge (if anyone else wishes to


> > conquer
> > > > it) is to make a vegetarian McRib.
> > > >

> > > > EXOTIC FOOD EXPERIENCES - stories of eating beyond the realm of the
> > Western
> > > > palate - a diet things that may be considered pets, pests or pretty
> > > > decorations in the U.S.
> > > >

> > > > GROCERY STORE SHENANIGANS - these 24 hour food oasis's are perfect
> > hangouts
> > > > for things besides buying food. Let's here of what you do and what
> > you've
> > > > seen others do.
> > > >

> > > > ORPHANED FOOD - you used to crave it, but now you moved or they
don't
> > make
> > > > it anymore. What is it and how do you cope?
> > > >

> > > > SCHOOL CAFETERIA CONFIDENTIAL - this is where the real education
takes
> > > > place. Bartering food, weird social strafication, gross out
contests.
> > > >

> > > > If you have any other great theme-related stories, please pass them
> > along.
> > > >

Skip Elsheimer

unread,
Sep 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/2/99
to
Ah man, first you can't smoke in bars in Calif and now this...!? California
isn't the wonderland that I hoped it would be.

I'm glad to see such a thing though.

Skip

<kevin...@my-deja.com> wrote in message
news:7qm6l3$m00$1...@nnrp1.deja.com...

Skip Elsheimer

unread,
Sep 2, 1999, 3:00:00 AM9/2/99
to
Thanks for the response.

I guess I should say that I'd like the responses emailed directly to me to
keep from cluttering up a.m.c-h.


Skip

Dave Schall <jdsc...@eos.ncsu.edu> wrote in message
news:37CECA60...@eos.ncsu.edu...


> This may prove to be fun so . . . Here it goes.
>
>

> > THIS SHIT TASTES LIKE FOOD -
>

> I've never eaten shit but I have a weird (or maybe not so weird)
association of
> Indian food, with body odor. So could sweat taste like maybe say - curry
> chicken? Also bamboo shoots taste like toilet water smells to me. Again,
could
> the reverse be true? Somebody want to test these hypotheses and let Skip
know?
>
>

> > My challenge (if anyone else wishes to conquer
> > it) is to make a vegetarian McRib.
>

> *There's currently meat in those?*
>
> >

> > GROCERY STORE SHENANIGANS - these 24 hour food oasis's are perfect
hangouts
> > for things besides buying food. Let's here of what you do and what
you've
> > seen others do.
>

> Riding the pony. It only cost a quarter (sometimes less depending on
location)
> - how could I not? Giddy-up. Picture this 6'-4" man riding 2'-3" plastic
pony.
> Hmmm.
>
> >
> >

> > ORPHANED FOOD - you used to crave it, but now you moved or they don't
make
> > it anymore. What is it and how do you cope?
>

> Two things:
>
> I miss Krystal Burgers - the Southern equivalent to White Castles - little
mini
> grease bombs that are only good at 3am after a night in the bars - only
they
> don't have them here for some reason! What's a drunk to do? Solution -
buy
> about two dozen of them when I'm home with the folks in Tennessee, freeze
the
> little suckers and thaw them in the microwave when on a bender. You can't
make
> them any worse so this is perfectly acceptable procedure.
>

> Also orphaned - hickory smoked -spicy tomato sauce based BB-Q (not that
local
> vinegar stuff or the icky sweet texas style stuff). Its not that I won't
eat
> the vinegar stuff, its that the tomato stuff is better! Sorry - I don't
mean to
> start the old vinegar / tomato sauce debate but that's just the way I feel
and
> you can't change my mind!
>
> Solution - Eat at Ott's, Buddy's, or Calhoun's BBQ in TN when home.
>
> (Note: Its a little out of the way but seeking out Ott's is highly
recomended
> when ever Knoxville)
>
> >
> >

> > SCHOOL CAFETERIA CONFIDENTIAL - this is where the real education takes
> > place. Bartering food, weird social strafication, gross out contests.
>

> I will never get over Jimmy Arnwine barfing up his peas in lunch in the
second
> grade. Scarred for life I am.
>
> > weird social stratification
>
> In eight grade we were assigned seats in lunch. Forced to sit together,
myself
> and the four other guys at my table formed a strong bond over the year,
causing
> all kinds of trouble, playing truth and dare and just generally acting
like
> obnoxious early-teen boys. The next year we all went to highschool and
never
> spoke again. They all turned into football / basketball jocks and I was
the
> nerdy punk skater kid they all loved to hate. Weird. I spent the next 4
years
> trying to figure it all out. Then thankfull college came or I would have
gone
> nuts.
>
> >
> >

> > If you have any other great theme-related stories, please pass them
along.
>

marcsl...@gmail.com

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Apr 30, 2019, 11:30:30 AM4/30/19
to
I don’t doubt that that story was true. I was a disaster back then. Glad I quit drinking in 2000. Kind of hilarious to read about my antics nowadays, being so far removed from that lifestyle. I wonder if anyone will see this?
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