I don't think obsessing over the big picture is a paradox it's just a human neurosis a true paradox is one like the barber paradox.
Or the Epimenides sentence. I don't even know if Epi is a paradox really it's just a sentence devoid of meaning. Go up to someone in the street and say "this sentence is false " , what meaning can they possibly extract from it other than
you like to go up to strangers and quote old Greeks.
Some of the text looks garbled but what it's from is the Apple dictation software and I should always go back and correct it but sometimes I don't to see if people can figure it out , especially it'll do things like put down can instead of can't , that gets kind of dangerous especially if you're trying to control nuclear weapons.
It looks like you're saying you sold the books but never read them . I guess that's all right , if you read the damn books you'd wind up with a condition like my first law covers: "Fantastic insight into the true nature of reality is pretty near the same as insanity".