I'm besides myself

Judith Latham

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Jul 27, 2021, 4:02:50 PM7/27/21

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I am leaving early Thursday morning to visit my sister Rivkah in Israel.
She lives on a kibbutz east of Jerusalem in the Gaza Strip. She is
getting married for the 3rd time, and I'm at my wits end trying to
figure out what a proper engagement gift would be. She's 34 and already
has 12 children from her first 2 marriages. She's marrying an 18 year
old Hasid, who happens to be a classmate of her oldest son Moses. You
know damn well a horny 18 year Jew is going to want to have more kids. I
was thinking of a chastity belt. Do they make them any more? I'm talking
about the authentic type that will cut a man's johnson off if he tries
anything funny. I'm not sure how their wi-fi is in the kibbutz so I'm
not sure when I'll be able to communicate with the group. Any
suggestions for a gift would be appreciated if presented by tomorrow
evening.

Thomas Joseph

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Jul 27, 2021, 5:55:28 PM7/27/21

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Judith Latham wrote:

> You know damn well a horny 18 year Jew is going to want to have more kids. I
> was thinking of a chastity belt. Do they make them any more? I'm talking
> about the authentic type that will cut a man's johnson off if he tries
> anything funny.

I am the last person to ask about what kind of gift to buy someone. I am neither giver or taker - I mean to say I'm really no faker.

The chastity belt is a form of security. Like all security measures - doomed to failure. If anything, the more security of any kind enters the picture the less secure things are bound to get down the road.

History tells us that cock sucking did not exist before the chastity built came into usage. I know it's hard to believe, but back then people saw the mouth strictly as a two-tool device, for eating and talking, nothing more. The reality of history is this: The chastity belt created cock sucking. Once they locked the cunt the doors to cock sucking swung free. Can't you see that? Can't you see how that applies to security across the board? It doesn't matter what you do or how far you go, in the long run any amount of security is too much.

I don't care how wide your moat is, I will find a way across. I will crash your castle and rock your world with my strange newness. By the way, we here at alt.life.sucks have nothing against Jews. In fact half our group is Jewish. How about that? Pretty fucking open minded I'd say. But the guy who started our group had one rule and we stick by it even to this day to honor his memory: "No posts to or from Israel." That is the rule. There are ways around the rule, we've done it before. I'll clue you in later. Say hello to Schlomo for me.

bosod...@gmail.com

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Jul 27, 2021, 5:55:58 PM7/27/21

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I kinda know what you mean having lived in Israel myself among vatikim, yoreds, Sabras, and all the other kinds of Jews there is prolly a lot like discovering your own flesh and blood be they brothers, sisters, cousins and all those other Jews in Eretz Israel are not the people you'd like to think they are just cuz they may or may not be related.

Thomas Joseph

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Jul 27, 2021, 6:09:25 PM7/27/21

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> I kinda know what you mean having lived in Israel myself among vatikim, yoreds, Sabras, and all the other kinds of Jews there is prolly a lot like discovering your own flesh and blood be they brothers, sisters, cousins and all those other Jews in Eretz Israel are not the people you'd like to think they are just cuz they may or may not be related.

"Different kinds of Jews", hey, that's kind of like different kinds of people, isn't it? Except it's Jews. Why the limitations? Come on man, don't you think it's time to join the human race? No, right now is probably not a good time. I kibitzed in Lancaster Pa for two years and met all different kinds of Amish. Then later in life I kibitzed in Detroit Michigan for 8 months and met all different kinds of Negroes. It's amazing how people can be so much the same and so different at the same time. Wow, this is intriguing.

Judith Latham

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Jul 28, 2021, 12:43:02 AM7/28/21

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We are all Jews. Back in 1943 distinctions were not being made; but if
they were, I think you would be considered more Jewish than me. On your
dating profile, you had a real Jew face. I was surprised that you picked
a photo that was so ethnic. If everything is on the up and up, I would
like to introduce you to my sister, Sarah. She's got a real Jew face,
just like you. Some matches are made in heaven and some are made in
alt.life.sucks. This could be the real deal, Bozo. Go for it!!

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Jul 30, 2021, 3:07:02 PM7/30/21

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> I was going to wish you L'chaim "Judith" but when you said you're going to visit sister Rivkah who lives in a kibbutz "east" of Jerusalem in the Gaza Strip no less, I said to myself this is even funnier, dumber, and more bogus than the Jewish looking foto you said you found of me on your dating site. Hey I don't know if you're a Jew or not, Judith, because there are a lot of self-hating Jews and other assholes who think they're Jews and they're just self-hating assholes like TJ who has nothing else on his mind other than his diffidence towards Jews and his general feelings of inferiority which he shares with a lot of disturbed people like himself. But even if you're not a Jew, Judith, you're funnier than most assholes who'd like to think they are Jews. In any case, Judith, good luck and L'chaim — and if I were you, I'd get rid of that first cartoon foto you posted here mocking a circumcision — it's pretty bad taste and pretty dumb old shit and the kind of stuff you'd expect only from dumb old nazis and a few malignant self-hating Jews who don't know anybody. But Jew or not, I think you do know better, and I've made some pretty dumb anti-Semitic comments and mistakes myself thinking I was being funny. L'chain.

You just can't let it go, can you Bozo? The Jew thing. You can't live without it. It's all you've got. Pretty pathetic actually. I would like to feel sorry for you, but I can't bring myself to do so because I'm not sure you'd even feel genuinely sorry for me for any reason. It's a tit for tat world, Clown. This is not a one way street. I wish it were. A one way street going my way. But it's not. And so, once again, I face the truth with resolve and courage, not running from it with bogus challenges and other forced fraudulence like pretending to think stuff is funny to suck people into thinking you are their friend. You disgust me Clown. But there are worse people, so for now I'll just say you're an all right dude and let it go at that.

Salam

Judith Latham

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Aug 12, 2021, 8:32:43 PM8/12/21

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Bozo is a good man and I suspect he is also a good Jew. I believe that
people with sinister intent created a fake profile for Bozo on various
dating sites. I foolishly fell for one of them. You have to understand
that we Jews are a proud people, just like everybody else. We're also a
fucked up people, just like everybody else.

OllieN...@aol.com

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Aug 12, 2021, 8:51:23 PM8/12/21

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I think Jews are special.

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 12, 2021, 11:25:04 PM8/12/21

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Aug 19, 2021, 8:36:57 PM8/19/21

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One more time with feeling. I have heard that many times before. Well I am out of feelings.

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 20, 2021, 3:07:44 PM8/20/21

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> "One more time with feeling. I have heard that many times before. Well I am out of feelings."

That was beautiful Ollie. Great rendition. But toward the end, after you say "I have heard that many times before", I want you to take a longer pause before you say, "Well I am out of feelings." Ok? Try it. Go ahead. See what I mean? Yeah, that pause really brings it. I hate telling you what to do, even suggesting seems out of line. Nobody could handle this role but you. I knew that from the start. Still, we gotta keep working till we get it right. This is show business, not you and your friends putting on a play in your parent's basement - this is the big leagues and we do things right or we don't do them at all. I am glad to see you agree about the longer pause. I really believe we're going to get it right this time........

"Ok, everybody - quiet! Quiet on the set. Let's do it again. Scene 7, take 234. Action!"

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Aug 22, 2021, 2:17:38 PM8/22/21

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If anyone tries pinning a murder on Bozo, I will cast a mighty spell on
them.

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 22, 2021, 4:44:01 PM8/22/21

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> Children commit a lot of murders but you never hear about them. They get blamed on the town retard.

Those were the good old days, weren't they, when a town only had one town retard. Today there is competition. As for the kids committing murder, certainly, why not? Same in reverse, parents should have the right to kill their kids. But only after enough years have passed to prove that at least some effort was made to get along. But if at a certain officially legal age the parents see the kid as a bad seed, yes, in that case I would say it's ok for the parents to kill them - in a humane way. As for kids and the retard - wow, what a horrible life for the retard - ridiculed daily by the very children who later frame him for their murder. Wow.

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 22, 2021, 4:47:36 PM8/22/21

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> If anyone tries pinning a murder on Bozo, I will cast a mighty spell on
> them.

Bozo likes to ask questions. One of his favorites is, "What does "'Dude, you can't even get arrested' mean?" Nobody could ever pin a murder on Bozo because he not only does not look the type, he looks the complete opposite. Even Judges on the bench with tons of evidence against him would free Bozo on looks alone. "He's too meek to kill", the Judge would later explain to reporters wanting to know why he allowed the child molesting killer to go free.

OllieN...@aol.com

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Aug 22, 2021, 7:17:43 PM8/22/21

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Sometimes a child is tried as an adult but why not an adult get tried as a child.

He was very childlike during the killing.

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 23, 2021, 11:27:55 PM8/23/21

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> He was very childlike during the killing.

I read your posts last night in bed on the smartphone which I cannot use for posting. I did not want to get up and use the big machine, I had an early appt with a doctor. I saw this one as an LOL. I see the prosecution agreeing with reluctance. "Yes, yes, we can see in the video that he was indeed very childlike during the killing - but if you look really close you will see that like most children this murderous adult son of a bitch had hate in his heart. You can see it on his face. Check out the videos."

The prosecution tries to convince the jury with videos and so forth that hate was involved even if the murderer was childlike during the killing.

"That is not hate", counters the defense counsel, "what you're looking at is tantrum stuff. There is a difference. Sure it looks like hate on the surface, but if you look really close you can see it's more tantrum than hate any day. It clearly has a rumpus room vibe to it. Check it out."

The Judge finally rules in favor of the defense because he was not only a child at one time, unlike most people he remembers it clearly. He knows when he felt hate and he knows when he was tantrum induced. He knows the difference. That is why is a Judge.

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Aug 30, 2021, 12:32:29 PM8/30/21

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Keeping a negro in chains these days is frowned upon by polite society.
I would suggest an electronic bracelet; one that can not only track his
movements, but can also zap him with 2000 volts of electricity if he
gets out of hand. In this day and age, we must treat our pet negroes
with dignity and respect.

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 30, 2021, 5:57:42 PM8/30/21

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> He is King Kong for real. I can see him climbing a tall building.

I can see him falling from a tall building. With CGI a lot of old movies can be used for comedy. Just certain scenes. Like the scene where Kong has the broad at the top of the Empire State Building. Instead of Kong, suddenly we see Mike Tyson. But he is not holding her in his arms Kong style. He is not petting her protectively. He has her up against the base of the skyscrape's antenna and is fucking the living crap out of her. Up the ass. Pieces of her shit falling to the crowd below. And again via CGI, keep the 1930s crowd scenes, but insert the flashing of cellphone cameras as the crowed gathered below captures their favorite moments from the once in a life time event. Many are taking selfies so they can later say what everyone who has ever lived always wants to say: "I WAS THERE, MAN!"

Thomas Joseph

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Aug 30, 2021, 6:04:03 PM8/30/21

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> Keeping a negro in chains these days is frowned upon by polite society.
> I would suggest an electronic bracelet; one that can not only track his
> movements, but can also zap him with 2000 volts of electricity if he
> gets out of hand. In this day and age, we must treat our pet negroes
> with dignity and respect.

I am going to get serious a minute because I genuinely believe what I'm saying and have for a long time, that the Negro was not singled out for abuse on the basis of his skin color, but was a natural choice for the safety of society. Maybe not in the long run though. You see, the Negro came to this country already wearing a convict uniform in the form of his skin. imagine trying to escape. To where? At least a real convict uniform can be removed. But the Negro wears his all the time. So it was - and is - only natural for those in charge of arresting people to turn to those who can't escape as easily. But in some ways it wound up differently than they had hoped. The Negro ghettos in some towns are massive enough to be cities unto themselves. They are fortresses. I know, I drove a cab. I've been through them many times. Sure, people living there have it tough, they have to avoid certain people. But if you are white and you're taking a Black to the big ghetto and he fucks you over somehow and you get out to chase him you will be out of luck because everyone the fortress will protect him. The very fortress we ourselves built.

OllieN...@aol.com

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Sep 1, 2021, 2:42:24 AM9/1/21

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What color are Afghanis? They are coming in by the millions now. We need to be able to spot them. I bet they smell. Get your noses in shape.

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Sep 9, 2021, 6:09:37 PM9/9/21

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I absolutely love nightmares. I take plenty of Ambien at night just so
that I can fall fast asleep and dream away. My favorite nightmares are
the ones where it's 1944 and I'm in a Nazi death camp, standing on a
line waiting to take a shower. The guard yells "We need more soap" to
one of the kapos, who points directly at me and says "This fat one here
should provide us all the soap we'll need for the rest of the war".
Everyone on the line starts laughing uncontrollably. Even the SS can't
help but chuckle. That's usually where I wake-up, so very disappointed
that I never get to walk into the shower room.

Thomas Joseph

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Sep 9, 2021, 7:13:57 PM9/9/21

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> Everyone on the line starts laughing uncontrollably. Even the SS can't
> help but chuckle. That's usually where I wake-up, so very disappointed
> that I never get to walk into the shower room.

Life is all about give and take. The theory of relativity. Sure, few people want to spend their days in a concentration camp. To them - to you - this is a nightmare. But imagine being all alone in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the winter with frozen rain pouring down on you, shivering and crying for someone or something to come along and save you - at that moment confinement in a camp would be a step up. Well, it could be. It could also be worse. Depends on what they want to do. Point is, I am sure there are many people, myself included, who could give you nightmares so extreme that you'll be begging for a re-run of the camps. You could also die in a way so horrible that you would be begging for the shower room. Of course that's the story of life and suffering, isn't it? The grass is always greener on the other side type stuff. It can always get worse. I will see to it.

Sep 18, 2021, 11:20:54 AM9/18/21

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Magazines appear to be dead. The Internet killed them. Perhaps that is where the magazines obits are.

Judith Latham

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Sep 19, 2021, 12:15:41 AM9/19/21

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What could we say at Bozo's wake? I would hope something uplifting and
positive, and not focus on how he's been a real dickhead of late. Would
it be appropriate to offer a eulogy in Japanese, especially if nobody
there understands the language? I think there'd be more room for honesty
if nobody knew what was going on. Could condolences be offered in a form
letter where you just fill the name in the blank spots? Death can be
very confusing for everyone involved, including the corpse. It must suck
to lay in a box and hear people talk shit about you.

,

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Oct 3, 2021, 12:50:43 PM10/3/21

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I met a guy a few years back who all he wanted to do sexually was sniff
my asshole while he jerked himself off. What is wrong with men like you?

Thomas Joseph

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Oct 3, 2021, 10:13:46 PM10/3/21

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> Yet you will post on sex extensively. I got the proof. Ass sniffing and all.

Yeah, but that's not sex, it's more in the realm of science. Sure, sometimes a good whiff might make the old bone jump, but that is not my main purpose. I'm a smell man, no doubt about it. But I am not a sex addict. I am not man enough.

Thomas Joseph

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Oct 3, 2021, 10:17:09 PM10/3/21

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> I met a guy a few years back who all he wanted to do sexually was sniff
> my asshole while he jerked himself off. What is wrong with men like you?

Ass sniffing is seen by many as odd or even insane. But it is normal. Very normal. Any guy who says he doesn't like the smell of the proper asshole, or more accurately the cheeks that surround the hole, soft pillowing folds of feminine flesh with a reek all its own. It can be disgusting though. Especially when it's over and fruition has been achieved. At that time the alluring reek of a lady's inviting ass quickly becomes just another small town sewer.